A/N: This is my latest Jori fic that I started writing ages ago. I had the idea after my other story life through Cat's eyes and was always thinking about doing a jade's diary story. This isn't a life through Cat's eyes sequel but it is in a similar fashion I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Victorious and the title comes from an old TV show called "As told by Ginger" I thought it fitted.

Dear Diary;

12.30pm

It feels weird being single. I was with Beck for so long that I forgot what it was like to be able to do whatever the fuck I want without him giving me the look. You know the look. The 'I'm disappointed in you look'

Well thank fuck I don't have to deal with that anymore! Then I remember all of the good times we had together. I have to admit that we were happy at times but I'm beginning to realize that we did argue a lot. They say arguing is healthy in a relationship but we went to extremes.

Oh no! Now you think we hit each other?! No that never ever happened! Beck would never hit me and vice-versa. I kicked him once in my sleep but that was purely accidental, I wasn't exactly used to sharing a bed. What I mean is we took the silly things and blew them way over proportion. I also got insanely jealous and sometimes he messed with me, played games because he knew it would wind me up. So I guess no matter how sad I feel right now about losing him. I guess in the end it will prove to be a good thing. Maybe?

I don't know that yet. We broke up a lot in the course of our relationship. A couple of months ago I wrote a song for him, giving him a chance to take me back. I sang with all my heart. If he took me back it was a second chance and if he didn't well then I could move on. Of course he took me back and we dated for a while.

It's been four weeks since we split up. There is about four months left of school and after that it's all over. It's the end of an era. I have no idea what comes next now. I've applied for a few schools but I haven't heard back just yet.

I still miss him sometimes but that doesn't mean I don't fantasize about other people. I briefly thought about André but well… he's attractive and all but he's not making my head spin and making me all tingly inside and all that crap so I won't go there. Robbie's a no on so many levels. I don't think of him in that way besides Cat has a thing for him and he clearly has a thing for her… and any walking, talking and breathing girl in our school.

Right this moment I'm in Sikowitz' empty classroom sitting in a chair by the window. Outside Tori is talking to Trina, she looks mad about something. I'm not quite sure what she's mad about but her forehead is creased and she looks sad too. I don't like it when Tori is sad, not because I care or anything ridiculous as that. It's because seeing her sad isn't fun to look at. At least she's not crying because Tori's tears are annoying. Not that she cries very often, it's just when she does I want to hug her and make the tears disappear and then that would mean I have to admit that I don't despise the ground she walks on. We've come a long way since the first day we met and I know that at times we've actually managed to get along but I'm not ready to wipe away her tears or anything like that. She turns away from Trina and spots me, she waves and smiles but I turn away.

Fuck! I am such a freaky person. Shit! Am I turning into a freaky stalker like… ugh! Sinjin? I know I'm not obsessed or in love with her…. but I did, Oh god! I did read her medical records…

5pm

Sorry, Tori interrupted me earlier, I was happily minding my own business and freaking out in this diary when she yelled my name from behind.

I jumped and dropped this diary. I quickly scooped the thing up and stuffed it in my bag extremely un-gracefully.

"What's that?" Tori asked, quirking her eyebrow up and noticeably smirking a little. My heart practically jumped out of my chest. Okay, it didn't but it felt like it.

"Nothing! It's just some notes on the outdoors for a setting for a play…." I improvised. I know it's lame but it was all I could come up with. She shrugged it off but she still had this look in her eyes.

"Why'd you come here anyway?" I asked, needing a change of subject and distract her from me.

"I just got seasons one and two of 'Orphan Black' on DVD and I thought maybe you'd want to watch it with me this weekend?" Tori wandered, she was shuffling her feet awkwardly and I couldn't refuse. Orphan Black is now my latest guilty pleasure.

"Sure. Sounds good, your place? Say 2 pm on Saturday?" I suggested, Tori nodded then swiftly left the room.

So yeah, do you think I have a problem here?

Jade West

A/N: So that's it for this chapter. Over the Christmas break I'm hoping to update this and all my other stories. I hope you liked it, let me know in a review.