A/N: I've made no secret of my love of Pemma- I've been shipping the two together since the end of June, when Kring first announced Emma's introduction. But I admit, I expected to be disappointed; the Heroes writers are notoriously bad at writing good romance. And then I saw Shadowboxing. I stand corrected. Hence this.
~*Tearing Down The Wall*~
Peter's late coming home tonight. He's been at the hospital for ages dealing with the incoming stream of patients after the train wrecks, and somehow he managed to work half of a third shift before his coordinator realized he'd been there all day and strong-armed him into going home.
Overuse of his healing power has completely drained him, and Peter is exhausted. Before he collapses into bed, though, there's something he has to do.
He stands for a few minutes before the wall, rubbing his jaw and staring at it. Some forty articles cover the flaking blue paint, all of them detailing his various rescues. This was supposed to be his reminder to himself that he could make a difference without getting caught up in great dramatic events again. But somewhere along the line, it became something else. It became his obsession; it became his entire life, and he had no time for anything that couldn't be pinned up on this wall later.
He's starting to see now what everyone's been telling him- Bennet, Hesam, even his mother to some extent. This wall in his apartment is the physical representation of a very different kind of wall in his life. Peter didn't realize it until just today, but now he sees just how much he's been changed by the last insane year of his life. His heart used to be wide open for anyone to walk into without even knowing it; now he's got walls so high even he doesn't know how to get around them. Whether it's because of the loss of so many people he cared about or because he's had his eyes opened to the true darkness a human face can mask, he's not really sure. Either way, he's somehow forgotten quite what it means to love unconditionally. Growing up is one thing, but becoming so jaded, cutting himself off from everyone? That's not right, even he can see that.
Hiro was right- there is something very, very wrong with his life. But he doesn't need a time-traveler to fix it. Peter's going to have to do that all by himself.
Then a small smile crosses his lips as he thinks of Emma. Maybe not entirely by himself, then. But first, there's something he needs to do.
In a single, decisive movement, Peter crosses the floor space between him and the wall and pulls a thumbtack from the most recent of the articles. The newsprint flutters to the floor and lands face-up. The headline screams at him, Hero Paramedic Saves Family of Four. He picks up the short article and studies it for a moment. Then he smiles and sets it down on the chair next to him and begins pulling the rest of the papers down, one by one. Bit by bit, he tears down the whole wall.
Peter knows the reason he's had his eyes opened. It has everything in the world to do with a pretty blonde doctor-turned-file clerk who's got some impressive walls of her own. But she trusted him enough to lower her barriers and give him a glimpse of the woman behind them, as well as the tragedy that built them. The least he can do is return the favor.
Before he knows it, all the articles are in a neat little stack on the chair. Peter picks them up and contemplates them briefly. Then he sighs disgustedly. They're his subconscious way of clinging to past victories, of proving that he's just as good as the rest of them. He doesn't want to hold onto the past any longer- his past as a paramedic or... other things. It's time to move on.
Just last week, the future would have been relatively dull, if fulfilling. A steady job, where he had the opportunity to save lives and be a hero, and not necessarily just with his powers. But that was it. Minimal contact with his family, few friends outside of Hesam. That wasn't really living. What good was making a difference if he was still losing his faith
But today? Today things are looking a little brighter. Something- someone- has managed to distract him, managed to pull his focus away from the job. Suddenly he finds himself not thinking so much about his strategy for tomorrow, what he's going to do to save as many as possible, and more about things outside work. Not that there's much, right now.
There will be, though, starting tomorrow. Predictably, Hesam will ask him to go to Houlihan's with the guys, and he's thinking about actually going for once. Friends. It's been a long time since Peter's actually had a friend outside of the little circle of heroes he met on his quest to save a cheerleader. It's almost a foreign concept to him, now. But still... friends. And maybe... maybe a girlfriend?
Way to get ahead of yourself, Petrelli, Peter chastises himself.
He would be lying, though, if he said he wasn't attracted to Emma. Actually, he'd be lying if he said anything less than that she absolutely fascinated him. There was just something about her that he couldn't quite put his finger on. That little smile she got on her face that let him know, even when he couldn't see them himself, that she was watching her face. Her own quiet brand of strength, and an absolutely cool head that he envied. Something about it all added up to one completely bewildering woman. Something about her just pulls him to her every time he sees her. She's showing him the way to tear down his walls.
Peter moves to toss the pile of articles in the trash, but a knock on the door interrupts his thoughts, and the world comes crashing in again.