Disclaimer: I don't own POTC or X-Files. Le sigh.
A/N: This is for my Secret Santa, Allyson, on HtR! Merry Christmas!
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Fox Mulder, special agent in the FBI, head of the X-Files Division, key figure of a government conspiracy, and a highly honored graduate of Oxford University, considered himself highly qualified to complete various difficult and super-secret tasks that came along with his lifestyle. Picking out a Christmas gift for Scully, however, was something that he found utterly impossible.
We agreed not to exchange gifts, Mulder thought, frustrated as he strolled down aisle after aisle of the decked-out-in-decorations department store. Why am I even putting myself through this?
He knew why he was doing this, deep down, though he refused to admit it to himself or anyone else. Being in love with your partner was not exactly something the FBI smiled upon, and it seemed that Fox "Trust No One" Mulder couldn't even trust himself with the reality of his feelings.
So, intent on his task, he padded blindly down another perfume aisle, not really seeing any of the colorful glass bottles on the shelves, until he collided with someone headfirst coming from the other direction.
He was caught off balance, and not even years of training in the FBI Academy could have helped him prevent hitting the ground with a resounding smack that he was sure could be heard throughout the store. Shaking his head to clear his vision, which had temporarily blackened at the impact, he jumped up from the ground and glanced around to see if anyone had noticed the fall. Luckily for Mulder, he and his collider were alone in the aisle.
Looking over to the person responsible for this embarrassing fall, Mulder's profiling eyes found another young man with brown curly hair and dark brown eyes leap up from the ground, brushing himself off as he went. He wore a blue bandana to hold his hair back and a hoop in one of his ears, as well as a loose fitting white shirt and bleached jeans. His entire appearance- from the free, long hair to the relaxed clothes- made him look like the epitome of a cool college kid, though he looked to be around thirty. The other man's laid-back look made Mulder's suit and tie look too formal for casual Christmas shopping, but Mulder internally shrugged. He had come straight from work, where Scully had told him that she liked his tie…
Breaking into Mulder's musings, the young man's voice drifted towards him. "Hey, sorry man," were the words he chose for the moment, his light British accent pervading his speech only slightly.
"They say that failure is not falling down, but staying down," Mulder said dramatically, causing the man to pause and quirk his eyebrow. He had been expecting a 'That's fine' or 'Watch where you're going' and then he would have been on his way, but this man surprised him. Mulder smiled, "So I think I'll live."
"Will Turner," the man said, sticking his hand out.
"Mulder," he said, shaking the man's hand with a casual smile. "Were you so blinded by the lights of commercial America and the red sale tags that it caused you to run into me?" he asked in his usual sarcastic manner.
"No," Will replied, distractedly gazing around at the pretty bottles that lined the shelves. "Just trying to find a gift for my girlfriend." There was a faint note of hysteria in his voice as he said the last bit.
Mulder nodded understandingly.
"You too?" Will questioned, meeting his eyes.
"Yeah, but not for my girlfriend, per se," Mulder responded, "She is my friend, and she is a girl, but she's not my girlfriend…" he fumbled, trying to describe what Scully was to him. Will waited patiently. Mulder finally arrived at, "She's my partner at work."
With a knowing gleam in his eye, Will nodded as if he was reading more into Mulder's comment than Mulder wanted him to. "Any ideas?" Mulder asked, to stop the meaningful glances that Will was sending his way and gesturing wildly to the various array of signs that read "The Perfect Gift!" and "Every Woman's Dream!"
Will shook his head helplessly. "Not a clue, mate. I've been wandering around in this store for hours." He slid his hands into his jeans pockets smoothly, shrugging his shoulders.
"Maybe we should just find something that we would like," Mulder pondered thoughtfully, "You know, give them something that we would appreciate receiving."
"It's a place to start," Will responded, grateful for any ideas. "What are you into?"
"Me? Oh, I enjoy a wide variety of academic and highly intriguing pursuits that lead me into the far corners of the world…" Mulder rambled, but was silenced by a look from Will. "Aliens," Mulder said sheepishly.
"I think you're in the wrong department store," Will said with a grin, strolling out of the aisle. "Is that related to your work?"
"Sort of," Mulder replied vaguely.
"You sound like you're really work-oriented then," Will said instinctively, "Why don't you get her something functional?"
"But what?" Mulder questioned the heavens. What on Earth could Scully, one of the most put-together, organized people in the world ever need?
"Here let me help you…"
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After Mulder was finally satisfied with the gift he had picked out (with Will's help) for Scully, it was time to turn to Will's girlfriend.
"What do you like to do?" Mulder asked him, the same question Will had asked Mulder not long ago. By now, they had made their way to the hardware section of the department store.
"I'm into metalworking and that kind of stuff," Will said. "But I don't think Elizabeth would appreciate a new hammer or drill, do you?"
"I think you might be right there," Mulder said sarcastically.
"She's really into this whole idea of … pirates, though," Will admitted, feeling slightly awkward even though Mulder had admitted his obsession with aliens.
Mulder didn't flinch. "Then get her a book on the history of pirates! It's called Pirates of the Caribbean: she'll love it."
Will looked at it skeptically. "Do you really think so?"
Mulder nodded frantically. "That's it! Now let's get out of here!"
And with that, both men bolted for the cash register, ready to leave the department store far behind.
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A little while later (during the "Ghosts Stole Christmas Episode")…
"I know we agreed not to exchange gifts…" Mulder smiled, trailing off and handing Scully a small, wrapped package. "But I got you a little something."
"Mulder," Scully said playfully, taking the gift. "Well, I got you a little something too," she said, pulling a wrapped package out of her coat.
Together, she and Mulder dashed for the couch and began unwrapping their presents, like two children on Christmas morning, with "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" playing on in the background.
Mulder managed to get his open first: it was a book on the formation of the universe. Mulder was slightly perplexed, seeing as he wasn't a big fan of astronomy. Scully smiled at him. "Just something I thought might be interesting to you," she said, taking the book from his hands and flipping it over so that the back cover was displayed. A neon yellow title on the back read, "What the History of the Universe Tells Us About Extraterresterial Life." Mulder's face lit up: astronomy might not have been his thing, but extraterrestrials definitely were.
Just as he was going to tell Scully thank you, she managed to unwrap her own present: a little glass figure of a whale with the words "Moby Dick" carved into the bottom. She was speechless. Mulder thought that maybe she was confused. "It reminded me of you.. and your dad," he explained, "You know, he used to call you Starbuck and you named your dog Queequeg... and you said it was your favorite book..." Mulder trailed off, trying to catch her attention. "You don't like it."
She finally met his glance, and her eyes were slightly misted over with nostalgia. "No, no, I love it, Mulder," she said sincerely. "I just can't believe you would remember all that, and that you would... know what this means to me."
"Don't get sentimental or anything, Scully," Mulder falsely scoffed, stretching his arms out and placing one comfortably on Scully's shoulders. Luckily, he thought, she didn't shrug him off.
Someday, Mulder thought as they sat cozily together on the couch, someday he would be able to tell Scully what he really felt. Someday he would draw up the courage to tell her that he remembered her liking of Moby Dick because he loved her, and because he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. But not today.
"Merry Christmas, Mulder."
"Merry Christmas, Scully."
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A/N: Well there you go! I was debating whether to leave what the presents actually were ambiguous, but I decided with this ending. I think the presents match with the shape of the presents in the episode "How the Ghosts Stole Christmas," but I'm not sure. I tried my best ;)