a/n: Inspired by Think before you speak by WhoYouReallyAre.
"Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile."
("Well you've been around the wedding block a few times.")
Duffy doesn't even know why Louise's comment bothered her so much. It was Louise. She wasn't exactly one to sugar-coat her words, was she? Plus there was an element of truth in her words. It wasn't her first marriage.
It just struck a nerve, it's why she was here. At Andrew's grave.
It had been sixteen years since she'd visited last. Gave it one last tidy up before she left for New Zealand, brought the boys along too. She was just secretly glad Andrew had family nearby that wouldn't allow his grave to become lost under the rubbish.
"Hi." She said quietly as she sat down.
She began to tidy up the litter and the dead flowers. She'd brought along a small bunch of flowers with her and she re-arranged them in the pot.
"Sorry I haven't been around."
The cemetery is pretty empty, the birds chirping in the distance and the sound of a car engine fill the occasional silence.
28th February 1993.
She remembers the day like it was yesterday. Other than the day their boys were born, (and the day she marries her best friend) it was the happiest day of her life. Everything in that moment was perfect.
"The boys are all grown up."
She smiles sadly when she says it. Paul never did get chance to meet his father, he died three months before he was born. It was the one thing that broke her heart the most. Losing him devastated her but the fact her youngster never got to know Andrew, that was something that still continued to haunt her most.
"Peter's married to Tanya, she's a lovely girl. They've got a daughter, your granddaughter Abbey."
She takes out a hanky and begins to clean his headstone as she continues; "Jake's travelling. He rang me yesterday, he's currently in Switzerland. He keeps telling me he'll be home soon and then he's booked a one way ticket to some country."
She laughs gently, "He's like you. He doesn't like to stay in one place for very long."
She closes her eyes tightly and wipes away the tear that's trickled down her cheek. "Paul—Paul's good. He doesn't want to leave New Zealand but can you really blame him? It's all he's known."
Duffy sighs sadly and bites down on her lower lip slightly harder when she feels more tears roll down her cheeks. She'd been much more emotional of late. When she'd married Andrew, she took her wedding vows seriously. The whole "For richer for poorer, in sickness in health, for better, for worse."
She never wanted to marry again.
She never wanted to go through a divorce.
That was why she stayed even when things were tough. Even when his affairs broke her, she still stayed because part of her didn't just blame herself for being a rubbish wife and not giving her husband what he needed but because, she didn't want to have a failed marriage.
Despite the heartache and the constant ups and downs, he did make her happy.
"I did love you, you know." She kissed her fingers and placed them on the gravestone, "I always will."
She wondered if it was possible to fall in love multiple times but for the love to always be different?
She loved Andrew. He was the first person she ever really loved. He gave her the boys. Without him, her boys wouldn't exist and she would always cherish the times they had together. She did care deeply about him.
She loved Ryan too. Ryan gave her a reason to smile after Andrew's death. He gave the boys a purpose and for that, she would always be grateful.
But neither of them could compare to the love she felt for Charlie.
Charlie was different. Charlie was her best friend, her soul mate. He knew her better than she knew herself, he knew all her secrets and all her flaws and still chose to love her. And she loved him too, she always had. Deep down, she'd loved him from the moment their eyes met in the carpark.
Swallowing away the tears, she kissed Andrew's headstone once more and stood up.
"Goodbye my darling."
She began to walk away when she heard a familiar voice, "I thought you might be here."
She glances up, her eyes falling upon Charlie and she smiles sadly. She wipes away the tears that have ran down her cheeks and he sighs sadly, wrapping his arms around her tightly. As she breaths in his aftershave, she breaks down in tears.
He doesn't speak, he just holds her.
"How—how did you know where I was?" She whispers.
He kisses the top of her head and doesn't answer for a second or two, "Louise told me what she said."
She closes her eyes and nods. Part of her feels she's overreacted and it's silly to be so emotional over someone who died seventeen years ago but Louise's comment just struck a nerve inside. She had to go and see him.
Charlie kisses her head once more and whispers, "Home?"
She smiles sadly and entwines her hand with his before whispering back, "Home."
She glances back at Andrew's grave once more before she heads home with the man she loves. The man she's always loved and the place she's always felt safe and secure. With him. Her best friend.
a/n: I'm not a Duffy/Andrew fan but it had to be written. If you like it enough to favourite/alert, please don't forget to review.