Notes: Have you noticed that Kaiba's company is threatened almost as often as his brother? Seriously, those poor employees probably went from, "Oh god we're getting bought out by a maniac," to, "This is another Tuesday," real fast. So yeah, basically, a patent attorney being annoyed with Children's Card Games deciding the fate of her health insurance, Joey wondering how goddamn many ancient prophecies can involve card games, and Mokuba being a little sass bastard. Either way, this is almost pure crack, written mostly for my own amusement.
A Girl With Good Dividends
"...and as you new C.E.O., I can promise you that the changes I will make to this company will lead us into a glorious future for all of mankind…" the asshole in the white robe droned.
She rolled her eyes and checked her watch. It wasn't as if her or any of her fellow Kaiba Corp employees were new to this. HR had even started including, "What to do in Case of Hostile Takeover Attempts," in their orientation videos. They all knew the drill at this point, all there was left to do was wait until this maniac got bored with monologuing, then go back to work. Those patent applications weren't going to file themselves after all.
This Grand Druid, or whatever he called himself, would be out of the building before the end of the week. She'd been here for five years and had put up with at least eight of these ridiculous take overs. They rarely lasted long and were at this point more of a nuisance than anything else. They were like a coworker who took your food from the breakroom refrigerator.
She leaned against the wall as he continued to talk about how he was going to usher in a golden age, restore the earth to its primal state, and other things that she honestly did not have time for. She wished she'd worn flats today. Whenever these meetings happened, she never managed to get a chair and they always took so damn long.
"Just hurry up and tell us what your health plan looks like!" she shouted. Sometimes, Mr. Kaiba would honor the promises made by the usurpers in order to ensure employee loyalty. They already had a very generous health plan, but better coverage never hurt and last time, Accounting got raises.
"You will find everything you need to know about Henge Industries at your desks," he said. "Now as I was saying, we will work in harmony together to restore the earth to its…"
She cringed. It was especially aggravating when they tried to change the company name. Once, when she was new and naive, she'd ordered new stationary with the lunatic du jour's logo replacing Kaiba Corp's. Her frustration when everything reverted to normal on the same say as said stationary arrived was just short of tangible.
She checked her watch again. He and the other so called druids had been at this for almost half an hour. If they hadn't offered complimentary coffee by now, there wasn't likely to be any later. Truth be told, free coffee and bagels were the only reasons she showed up to these meetings. They likely wouldn't notice if she left and went back to work. A few others already had.
So, she slipped out of the crowd through a side door and around the corner to the elevators and got into the first one available, then took it down three floors before realizing she was going the wrong way. Then after catching the right elevator, made it to Legal and her office.
She settled into her chair and pulled out a file containing plans for a new dual disk system. She would start looking over that in a little bit. Then she would leave early to escape this insanity, maybe before eight, and go home, open that box of wine, maybe watch one of her stories, and look over more paperwork.
But first, she would look at Henge Industries employee benefits. She flipped open the green manila folder on her desk. It was all very standard looking material, direct deposit paperwork, a few NDA's, a prospectus, other forms to look over, fill out, and give to HR by next week, absolutely nothing about Legal getting raises, a slightly more generous vacation and sick day plan, and at the back of the folder, a booklet detailing their health plan.
She opened the booklet and started to read. Henge Industries evidently decided to save money after their buyout by skimping on health insurance. Before she got half way through the booklet, her lips were pursed and her posture was tense.
She couldn't keep her usual provider. Henge Industries barely offered a dental plan and their prescription coverage was laughable. Vision was all but non-existent. Preventative care was actually non-existent. She didn't want to look at what they had in store for E.R. visits. In fact, the only things the new policy covered were Henge Industry products.
She sighed and put the folder into her desk. She couldn't wait for this annoyance to get over because she was not paying out of pocket for prescriptions and if there was one thing to be said for Seto Goddamn Kaiba, he gave them a real health plan.