"It's for your own good, you know."

"Just shut it, Malik."

"Oh come on, Bakura! This is important! You know that purple-haired slut's probably crawling with diseases! This is just to make sure you're safe!"

"...thanks, Malik. I feel a lot better now."

"Really?"

"NO!"

Bakura Touzokou dug his hands deeper in his jean pockets and glowered. His best and worst friend, Malik Ishtar, had dragged him to a medical clinic. As in, 'literally dragged him to the car before pushing him in, shutting the door, and driving him here.'

****ing 'Childproof Locks.'

Like most people, Bakura had a minor dislike of regular doctor's appointments. But in this case he had a valid reason to be particularly bitter.

Last month Bakura discovered that his long-term boyfriend, Otogi, had been cheating on him with some slut he'd met while clubbing. Because he'd trusted Otogi (a great decision on his part, Bakura reflected) they didn't always 'play it safe;' and now Bakura was concerned that he might have contracted whatever the hell that home-wrecking whore might've had.

And so Malik had dragged him to a local health clinic, insisting that he be tested.

As they sat down in the waiting room, Bakura reflected on how he ended up in this wretched place.

He'd met Otogi nearly a year ago, at a very popular club. The seductive man was equally smooth in his dancing and his words. It didn't take long for him to convince Bakura that they should be dating.

They'd both had their share of prior relationships, but the white-haired man always ignored the countless rumors that 'his boyfriend' was a serial cheater.

But Otogi turned out to be just what the rumor-spreaders had described: a sly operator with no morals or limits. Bakura felt nauseous when he realized how easily he'd fallen for the: 'I used to be a player, until I met you' bit.

Time ticked by slowly. Malik was looking through the various fashion magazines strew about the reception area. He occasionally pointed out the 'fashion fails' he found, but Bakura didn't really care.

Half an hour passed, and Bakura was starting to get pissed.

'Where the bloody hell is this stupid quack?! I'm paying hundreds of dollars for insurance just to be ignored in an empty waiting room for five bloody hours?!'

Suddenly, the receptionist spoke up. "Mr. Touzokou? The doctor called- he apologizes for the delay and wants you to know he'll be here soon. He asked that you go into the exam room in the meantime. It's the third door on the right." She pointed down the hallway.

Grumbling, Bakura left Malik (who was still laughing at some actress' neon-plaid hat) and stomped down the hall to 'Room #3.' He sat on the exam chair and scowled at the sterile-smelling office. There were various laminated medical 'charts' on the wall, and he turned his head to look at them. Ten more minutes passed, and Bakura was seriously considering walking out when there was a knock.

He didn't bother turning his head away from the bone structure chart- it was probably the receptionist saying the doctor was still on his way. Bakura frowned as heard the door opening, and a breathless voice started to apologize.

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Touzokou. My name is Dr. Ryou Bakura. Please excuse my lateness; there was an emergency ectopic pregnancy diagnosis and one of my colleagues is out of town."

Bakura snorted- he wasn't a terribly patient person- and he finally turned around. "Right, and there was really no other doctor in the whole facility who could handle... that...?"

He stared at the young man who had just stepped into the room. His eyes were a rich emerald green, and he had hair even more pure and pale than Bakura's own. His face was soft, and his button nose was perched above two perfectly tinted lips.

Bakura's brain seemed to have stopped functioning, as he could no longer think or move. He was captivated by the fair-haired latecomer. It took him a moment to realize that the soft voice ringing through the room was actually the physician speaking.

"-and unfortunately, with Dr. Mushashi out of town, there really wasn't anyone on duty with extensive experience with ectopic difficulties. And they wanted my advice just to be sure they found- erm, Mr. Touzokou? Is everything alright?"

"Uh? Yeah, fine."

The other white-haired man picked up a clipboard and a pen. "So, what brings you here today? I see it's been a while since you last visited a medical facility."

'Oh, crap.' Suddenly the reason for the visit came back to Bakura. This was going to be waaay more embarrassing than he initially thought. As his mind struggled to come up with some excuse to suddenly leave- probably by yelling something and running out of the room- he heard a gentle laugh coming from the other man's mouth.

"Don't worry, Mr. Bakura. I might be young, but I've heard it all. You're not likely to shock me." His voice sounded so kind and honest- it was very reassuring.

Bakura nodded and forced himself to speak.

"I, erm, recently learned that my partner was cheating on me- so a friend suggested I get tested."

Dr. Ryou Bakura frowned. "I'm quite sorry to hear that." His words were sincere and his face was sympathetic. "That must have been painful. But I'm glad you came in- it's not exactly pleasant, but it's always a good idea to be tested when you find that unknown parties may have been involved in your relations."

Bakura felt himself relax slightly. He got the strange impression that the physician had gone through something similar.

The next half hour or so was spent discussing Mr. Touzokou's health. Some of the questions were rather embarrassing, but Dr. Bakura's kindly demeanor helped keep the conversation somewhat comfortable. After the initial exam questions were answered, they slowly veered off-topic into more casual matters. Eventually they ended up talking about the many things they seemed to have in common. It was particularly amusing when they realized that they had both played the same popular trading card game in their youth. They made comments on each other's favorite decks and reminisced fondly about their duels. Bakura found himself smiling and even laughing at the doctor's odd tongue-in-cheek style humor. His 'look-alike' was quite witty- he wouldn't mind talking a bit longer. The visitor was already starting to feel more relaxed, at least.

But then, in what was undoubtedly the most awkward event in his entire existence- past and future- the computer made a ringing noise and the doctor informed Bakura that the lab was ready for his 'samples.'

Cr*p. He'd forgotten that he had to submit two 'samples' for the tests. He gulped heavily as the doctor gave him the instructions.

The urine sample wasn't too difficult, but he was more than a little embarrassed at providing a 'male sample.' He reminded himself that the other man was a professional, and it was necessary for the tests.

Embarrassed, he walked back in the room and turned his face away as he gave the man the plastic containers. But the young doctor wasn't even phased. It was just part of his everyday routine at the clinic.

The physician jotted down something on his notepad and nodded. "And I think that should just about wrap things up for this visit- our lab should have your test results available within a week. Generally one of the receptionists will call you when they arrive. He or she will also help you schedule a follow-up appointment to go over the results. Did you have any other questions today?"

Bakura shook his head 'no.' The doctor smiled.

"Excellent- then if you'll just hand your insurance card to the receptionist you should be all set! Have a nice day, Mr. Bakura!"

His smile was adorable, and the patient only managed an uneasy, "erm, you too," before returning to the waiting area. His tan-skinned 'friend' (and he was using the term very loosely right now) was just sitting on a chair with a magazine, not even hiding his knowing grin. Bakura went over the insurance information with the secretary and then stormed out; not even waiting to see if the blonde was following. Eventually the bronzed-skin man put down the magazine and followed his bad-tempered associate.

As soon as they were both out in the hallway, Bakura rounded on Malik.

"You bastard- did you think that was funny?!

Malik just grinned in innocently-wicked amusement. He wagged an index finger at his grouchy companion.

"Tsk-tsk. Now, now, Bakura; you know you really do need to watch your health. A second appointment isn't going to kill you."

The white-haired patient threw his arms outward. "Forget the bloody visits! I meant the doctor!"

Malik tilted his head in fake naivety. "Oh? You mean Ryou? He's one of Marik's good friends. I thought he sounded alright. Was there something wrong with him?"'

Bakura snarled. "YES! You sent me to a handsome stranger to get tested for blasted STD's! Do you have any idea how f***ing embarrassing that was?! He probably thinks I'm a slut!"

Malik waved a hand in dismissal. "Nah, he'd never think that. Marik's told me all about him. That guy's always talking about how he wishes more people would be responsible and see him." His smirk widened. "In fact, Ryou says he doesn't care about his patient's lifestyles; just their health." The blonde gave a haughty smile, as if he was entirely justified.

Bakura was losing his meager restraint. "Dammit, Malik! It's still humiliating, having to tell a breathtaking angel like that all about my failure of a sex-life! Do you know how many questions he asked me?! Hell, I had to give him a cup of my-!"

"Eh-hem."

Bakura froze.

No. There was no way his luck was that bad.

"Mr. Touzokou? Excuse me, but is this your insurance card? The receptionist found it in the waiting room."

…f***.

Bakura rigidly turned around and saw the endearing doctor holding out a blue plastic card. Dr. Bakura was smiling cheerfully. There was very faint tinge of pink on his face, but Bakura decided it wasn't meant for him. 'He's just warm from chasing us down.'

"Erm, thanks." The embarrassed card-owner quickly slipped the ID into his wallet.

"It was no problem." The specialist chirped pleasantly. "Oh, and you must be Malik! Marik's told me all about you."

The bronzed man laughed. "I assure you, only half of what you heard was true!"

"Well, it's nice to finally meet you!" The two shook hands, but then Ryou glanced at his wristwatch and sighed. "Oh dear... I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't stay and chat; we're a little short-handed today."

"That's fine, he has to come back anyway, right?" Malik smirked at the fuming patient.

"Right, whenever the lab calls back- Oh!" The MD suddenly pulled something out of his pocket. It looked like another insurance card. The medic grabbed a pen and scribbled something on the back.

"Here, this is my business card- and my number. Thank you again for your patience earlier!"

The young physician gave a polite parting bow and hurried back to his office.

Bakura watched as the attractive doctor walked down the hall. His white coat soon slipped behind the office door. As soon as the doctor was gone, Malik turned to his friend and smirked. "Well?"

Bakura scowled. "Well, what?"

The blonde put his hands on his hips and pursed his lips. "Well, what are you going to do with that?" He pointed to the white card in Bakura's hands.

The irritated almost-albino just tossed the card in the direction of the nearest trash bin. He rolled his eyes when he missed by a mile. This was definitely not his day.

The blonde nearly screeched. "What are you doing?! Why would you throw that away?!"

"Malik, I don't want to set up another appointment here. I'll find some ugly old doctor to talk about my-"

"No, I meant the number! Don't you want it?!"

Bakura raised an eyebrow. "You do know the hospital has a website? I'm sure all the individual office numbers are listed there."

Malik sighed dramatically and picked up the card. He handed it to Bakura. "Honestly, what would you do without me? Try flipping it over, genius."

Bakura blinked before flipping the small rectangle over. He'd forgotten that the doctor had written something on the back of the card. He stared at the handwritten message.

(876)- 555- 7982

This is my personal cell number- if you ever want to grab a cup of coffee please give me a call.

I sometimes work the overnight shift and can always use some caffeine and good company. :)

-Ryou

Bakura's eyes widened before they settled into an excited grin. His face took on a slightly dazed expression.

His luck was definitely changing. He heard Malik's annoying voice calling him, but he ignored it.

As he stood in stupor, a bronzed hand suddenly snatched the card from his grip.

The reverie was broken instantly.

"MALIK!"

The blonde ran towards the parking lot, cackling madly. The white-haired Romeo followed, shouting vulgar threats as he closed the distance. The bronzed man eventually dropped the card and his pale 'friend/mangler' stopped to pick it up.

Bakura flipped it over. The same goofy smile returned as he read the back again.

Bakura made a mental note to thank Malik- right after he finished killing him.