Had this idea floating around in my head for a little bit. It's obviously very unrealistic, but a girl can dream, right? Slight spoilers for 3.13, so read at your own risk. I apologize for any typos, all proof reading was done by only me.
To say it had been a hard week was an understatement. But of everything that could have gone wrong, more ended up right.
Although at times you could call it a character flaw, this time, it was good that she was too stubborn to leave the case alone. Without her and Castle quietly investigating from the confines of her apartment after Montgomery had pulled her, Ryan and Esposito could still be held hostage, or worse, after refusing to talk. And without the combined detective work from both sets of partners, they wouldn't have figured out the decades-old conspiracy. They wouldn't have caught the men at the top that orchestrated countless deaths—her mother's included. Yes, a lot could have gone wrong if she wasn't so strong-willed.
But strong-willed was what was keeping her from what she really wanted. Probably needed. Right now she sat at home alone. Too tired to move, but not able to sleep. She couldn't shut her mind off. She wondered what her mother's words would be to her after finally closing the case. She wondered how many other lives she'd saved, and families she'd saved from pain. But she also wondered about Him. Castle. She didn't want to. But she couldn't help it. Without him, she doesn't know where she'd be. If he hadn't looked into the case in the first place a few years ago, there's no way it would have ever been solved. She had put it to rest. But he could never leave anything alone.
Maybe they were more alike than she thought. She was too strong-willed to not push, and he was too curious to not push. It got them similar results.
Yet, she didn't want to be thinking of him right now. She wanted sleep. Desperately needed it. They'd been working this case almost non-stop for four days straight.
So she did what she rarely ever allowed herself to do, mostly because she never really needed to, and she took a sleeping pill. Half an hour later she was blissfully drifting into slumber.
Bang, bang, bang. "Mmmmm," she moaned, rolled over in her bed, and snuggled deeper into the covers. Then she heard the sound again. Bang, bang, bang. Was she dreaming or awake? She wasn't sure, but there was definitely a loud sound. She reasoned with herself that if she were dreaming, she would know what the sound was. She struggled to pull herself from the fog of the sleeping pills. What time is it, she wondered? Managing enough strength to lift her head and turn it towards her alarm clock, she waited for her vision to become clear before she confusingly acknowledged that it was 3:27 am. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. She realized the sound was coming from her front door. Only one person would be brave enough—or stupid enough—to just show up. If it were an emergency, anyone else would have called first. Though, maybe she slept through the ringing of her phone. She checked. No missed calls or messages. That all but confirmed it. The case was over though, couldn't he give her six hours of sleep?
She struggled to sit up. Stepping out of bed one foot caught in her sheets. She kicked furiously for a few seconds until it detangled. She shook her head to try and clear the fog. Okay Kate, you can think full thoughts, come on. She looked herself over. Boxer shorts and a long sleeved shirt. Not revealing enough to go through the effort of pulling her bathrobe from her closet. Slowly, she put one foot in front of the other heading towards her front door.
"Kate, I know you're home. Where else would you be at…" he paused to check his watch, "3:31 in the morning?"
She paused briefly, annoyed at hearing him, but then continued towards the door and called out, "I'm coming. Just please, stop banging."
When she reached her door, she put her hand on the knob, but took a deep breath instead of turning the handle. He definitely wouldn't go away without seeing her. He clearly thought something was important enough to come see her in the early morning hours when normal people sleep.
She really didn't want to see him. Actually, she did. But she was worried about where he would take the conversation. Because during the case, it had been easy to avoid talking about the kiss. Or thinking about it. When she was home alone, less so. Hence the sleeping pills. Even though it wasn't a real kiss—merely to distract a suspect—it was more real than they could have imagined. And while he was the only person she wanted to see once the case was over, the only person she wanted to celebrate with, aside from her dad, she had managed to push that urge aside in order to avoid his prodding. She knew he wouldn't do it while they were in the middle of the case. And he saw how exhausted she was once all was said and done. But she could tell. Could see the thoughts lingering in his eyes. Almost hear the words he was trying so damn hard to force back down his throat. For her sake. For a later time.
But here he was.
One more deep breath. She turned the doorknob.
He had clearly tried unsuccessfully to sleep. His hair was adorably messy, and he was wearing navy blue sweatpants and a white t-shirt with a light blue zip-up sweatshirt over it. They stared at each other for a second once the door was fully open. And for some reason she wasn't uncomfortable with the eye contact. But she so desperately wanted to be asleep, so she had to get this over with.
With a sigh she managed to breathe out, "Castle, what do you—"
And that was all he allowed her to get out.
He pushed her against the door, not roughly, but quickly, so she didn't have time to think. And as his face moved towards hers, and his head tilted ever-so-slightly to the right, his right hand came up and brushed across her cheek, glided under her ear, and gently fisted in her hair as his lips met hers.
It took her at least ten long seconds to figure out what was going on. Maybe it was the grogginess of the sleeping pills combined with her confusion at him showing up here in the middle of the night even though the case was over, but it was probably because she couldn't deny—to herself—that she liked what was happening.
But it wasn't right. And she thought, I should stop this. But before she could, he pulled away. And oh boy, did he know how to end a kiss. He lightly bit down on her bottom lip as he pulled away. And when he let go, he leaned back in to give her bottom lip one more chaste kiss. And then one more again, for good measure.
And she looked at him, ready to be angry, ready to push him away and slam the door in his face, or hit him, or pull her gun to scare the shit out of him—too bad is wasn't on her right now—but the look on his face stopped her from doing… anything.
He looked serious. And happy. And ten years younger. Like the care-free kid in the picture on the wall of The Old Haunt.
She had intended on saying something. Even opened her mouth. Nothing came out.
He spoke instead.
"Don't be mad. Because I know you don't really want to be. And don't even think about physical violence. I can see you're too tired for that anyways."
And she had to admit, he was right.
When she didn't say anything, just kept looking at him, he put his hands on her hips and leaned in for one more brief kiss. He knew he shouldn't push his luck though, eventually her brain would think of something to do.
He looked her in the eyes, and she saw that he was afraid, but not of her.
A beat later, he started speaking again, "Kate, I want to be with you." He paused, gathered his thoughts. "I think we both know that. I think other people know that. That I've wanted you for a long time. And I think you want it too. And we could make up a million excuses for why it wouldn't work, and why we shouldn't even try, but… I'd do almost anything just to try."
And suddenly she couldn't remember why they'd tried so hard to make sure it didn't happen.
Her hands, which had been resting on his chest, ready to either push him away or grab him and bring him closer, slid up his chest. And over his shoulders. And into the hair on the back of his neck. And pulled him closer. And suddenly they were kissing again. Slowly. Like they had all the time in the world.
A sudden realization hit her and she pulled away. "Castle, I'm with someone else." She said it as if she were surprised by this piece of information.
His face fell. He didn't know what to say. Or do. Especially with her hands still on him.
And then she surprised him.
"I want to be with you too."
And he smiled.
"But, I need to break up with Josh. I want to do this. Me and you. But I want to do it right."
"Okay. I get that," he said softly. And he did. "So, I'll just… see you tomorrow then." He slowly pulled out of her grasp and turned away from her.
"No," Kate exclaimed, almost as if it were a gut reaction.
Castle turned back around with a puzzled and amused expression on his face. "No what?"
And for the first time since she opened the door, she cracked a brief, bashful smile. "No, I don't want to see you tomorrow. Well, I do want to see you then, but I want you to stay. Now."
"But you just said—"
"Get your mind out of the gutter Castle. Just because I want you to stay doesn't mean you get to have your wicked way with me. Or, more realistically, the other way around."
The look of shock on his face was priceless.
"I just," Kate stumbled, not used to be being open with him about her want for him, "when I got home earlier, I didn't want to be alone. I wanted to be with you. Because I wouldn't have solved this case without you. It wouldn't have even been a case again without you. But, it was like neither one of us wanted to be the first to admit what we both wanted."
"Yeah," Castle responded, "you're a little stubborn sometimes."
"Hey, no interrupting, I wasn't done."
And he chuckled a little. She always had to be in charge.
But their moment of light banter was over, and she had a serious look on her face.
"I want you to stay here tonight. With me. I don't love admitting this. To me or you. But sometimes I like being able to lean on you. And after everything that happened, I just want to go to sleep—for about fifteen hours—with you next to me. Maybe cuddle a little?"
"Why detective, you cuddle? Only if you're big spoon though, right?"
And she smiled again, and replied "Just this once Castle, I'll let you be big spoon. But tomorrow morning you go home and I go have what will probably be a long conversation with Josh."
"And then after your conversation with Josh, you go home, take a nap, then a bath, then get ready for our date."
"A date huh? Don't you think were a little passed the getting to know you stuff?"
"Of course we are, but you deserve to be wined and dined. I know you'll say you don't need to be, but I want to spoil you."
"Tomorrow night Castle, spoil away. Right now, I need sleep. And you do too."
She grabbed his hand and laced their fingers together before turning and leading him through her apartment, back to her bed. She dropped his hand, pulled back the covers, and crawled in. He kicked off his shoes, pulled off his sweatshirt, and walked to the other side of the bed. He lifted the covers and climbed in. Then he scooted over until her back touched his chest and he wrapped an arm around her waist. A few minutes later, both of them were in a peaceful slumber, content knowing what tomorrow would bring.