So, yeah, another lemon fic from me. It was a request by tweek101. It's a Stan/Cartman XD rare pairing, but it has potential. Enjoy... :)


"Kyle, please don't leave me alone with him again," Stan pleaded.

"Sorry, dude, Kenny and I need some time alone, you're always with us," Kyle explained.

"I know... but I wanna watch the game and he won't let me, he'll just try to distract me again."

"Then don't let him distract you... and you can be happy that he's just in love with you and doesn't hate you because you're Jewish," Kyle said.

Stan sighed, "Yeah, and I love him, too, but I really want to see the game..."

"Stan, come here, you asshole, the game's already started!" the fat-ass shouted from the couch motioning for Stan to come sit next to him.

Kyle chuckled, "He even calls you asshole, what a retard, I really can't understand what you see in him..."

"Me neither sometimes," Stan sighed.

"Well I gotta go then, see ya," Kyle tapped Stan on the shoulder reassuringly and turned around to go to the door.

"See ya," Stan sighed again. He turned around, seeing Cartman look in his direction as the Broncos' line-up appeared on the TV screen. Stan went to sit next to Cartman and analyzed his team's tactic.

"So what do you think Stan, do the Broncos have a chance?" Cartman asked rather stupidly.

"Nope," Stan lied. He saw it as a last attempt to get rid of his boyfriend, though he knew very well that Cartman wasn't interested in the game at all, "The Steelers will most likely completely demolish them..."

Cartman raised his eyebrows, "Uh, why are we watching then?"

"Don't know... because we want to?" Stan asked.

"I don't want to... why don't we just go upstairs?" Cartman asked innocently.

"What do you wanna do there?" Stan asked looking at Cartman slyly.

"I don't know, maybe have a little fun, this game's gonna depress us anyway, don't you think?"

"Cartman, I don't want to have sex with you now, alright?" Stan tried to end the conversation.

"What? I don't wanna have sex with you, you faggot. I just wanna have some fun with you..."

"Aha, and what kind of fun do you have in mind," Stan asked, knowing it pretty well.

"I don't know... let's find out!" Cartman said and grabbed Stan's arm, pulling him from the couch.

"Ow! Stop it!" Stan protested trying to stop Cartman from pulling him upstairs. It didn't work though, because Stan was clinging to the couch, "I wanna watch the game, Cartman!"

"No, you come upstairs now!" Cartman said pulling on Stan's leg (literally).

"We can have sex later, Cartman!" Stan continued to protest and dug his fingers deep into the couch.

"No, now!" Cartman finally admitted his objective even though it was pretty obvious before, too.

"Fuck off!" Stan said, beginning to kick with his legs.

"Fine!" Cartman said, stopping to pull but not letting go of Stan's legs. Stan stopped kicking and looked at Cartman unbelievingly.

"If you don't wanna have sex upstairs... then we just do it here," Cartman grinned evilly now taking advantage of his hold of Stan's legs in a different way. He wrenched off his jeans and let Stan's legs fall uncomfortably to the floor.

"Hey! Give back my pants!" Stan said standing up quickly.

"No, no, no, I-" Cartman began.

"Touchdown Broncos!" it sounded from the television.

"Aw, awwwwww... thanks a lot Cartman, now I missed it," Stan said as he saw the Broncos celebrating the six points.

Cartman glared at Stan. He really hated it when the attention wasn't on him. He stomped to the TV and turned it off.

"Hey! Let me at least watch the kick."

"No, no, no Stan. There unimportant touchdown for you," he pointed to the TV, "Here important touchdown for you," he pointed to his body, "got it?"

Stan frowned, "Jesus, you're such a girl."

"Fuck you, Stan!"

"Give me back my pants!" Stan said realizing Cartman still held them in his hands. He wanted to take them from him but Cartman suddenly ran away, laughing, "hehe, get them if you can."

Stan chased after him, "Cartman, stop!"

Cartman ran upstairs into Stan's bedroom and as Stan almost caught up to him he quickly opened the window and threw the pair of jeans out in the Colorado snow.

"Aw, Cartman!" Stan said angrily, "Why do you have to destroy my day?"

Cartman grinned, "That's for your own good Stan, so now you can concentrate on the important things."

Cartman approached is furious boyfriend cautiously. Stan sighed heavily, "Alright, alright."

Cartman smiled and kissed his boyfriend gently. Stan kissed back and was immediately lifted off his feet and thrown onto the nearby bed.

"So you want me, too, little slut, huh?" Cartman grinned and lifted his shirt over his head.

Stan rolled his eyes, "Oh, brother," he said under his breath.

"What was that?" Cartman asked.

"Uh, yes, I do."

"Well, well, well..." said Cartman before kissing Stan again. He also let one hand travel down to the bulge in Stan's boxers. Cartman just made him hot, he didn't know why. Stan flung his arms around the larger boy continuing to kiss him passionately. Suddenly all thoughts about the Broncos were gone and there was just this one fat boy in his mind that he loved so much.

That boy, however, broke up the kiss to lift up Stan's shirt as well, so he could finally see the well-trained chest again. He smirked and lowered his head to kiss it, his hands still rubbing the bulge in Stan's boxers teasingly. Cartman slowly kissed his way to Stan's left nipple and bit down lightly, which earned him a load moan from the quarterback.

"Get to the real thing already!" Stan said, trying to slide down his boxers.

"Ay, don't be so impatient!" Cartman said, stopping Stan from undressing himself completely. "Let me do that, at least," Cartman added and got off Stan to slide the boxers down himself. Stan's erection shot up immediately and Cartman threw the boxers out of the window, too.

"Hey, what did you do that for?" Stan glared at his opposite.

"What?" Cartman asked innocently quickly diving down to take Stan's pulsating member in his mouth.

Stan gasped at the sudden temperature change and immediately forgot what he was going to say.

Cartman began to bob his head and increased Stan's pleasure even more by rubbing his balls with his right hand.

"Oh, yeah," Stan moaned in utter pleasure and let his hands travel down to Cartman head to entangle his fingers with Cartman's hair.

In the meantime Cartman's own cock was rock hard as well and because of that the selfish Cartman hurried things up a bit by bobbing his head even faster. Stan's moaning became louder and louder and he quickly shot over the edge and came in Cartman's mouth. The fat boy took it gratefully and swallowed all of it.

Cartman got up from the bed leaving the panting Stan alone for a second to get rid of his pants and boxers. After hastily taking his last clothes of he jumped onto the bed again.

Stan giggled, "Don't break the bed, dude."

"Fuck you, Stan," Cartman said. He kissed Stan gently again and muttered seductively, "Say Stan, what do you think is the score at the game now?"

"I'm leading, but..." they kissed again, "but maybe you can catch up."

"And how am I going to do that?" Cartman asked licking his right index finger.

"Well for one you could- ohh," Stan was cut off by his own moans, caused by Cartman's finger that had snuck his way up his ass.

"Do that?" Cartman asked beginning to slowly thrust his finger in and out.

"Y- Yeah," Stan said getting used to the feeling.

"Or should I possibly even..." Cartman added another finger, "...do that?"

Stan closed his eyes, "Yeah, b- but you gotta hurry, the time's running out and you're not even close to the equalizer, " Stan smirked.

Cartman, too, "So you're implying I should move from field goals to touchdowns, huh?"

"Why don't you find out yourself and... we'll see what the final score will be..." Stan said.

Cartman grinned and flipped Stan over quickly. He reached at the nightstand and took some lube out of the drawer. He treated his throbbing member with the lube, as well as Stan's asshole, "We don't want to hurt the defense too badly, right?"

"You're gonna get it, Cartman. My defense is strong," Stan said, continuing to play along even though he didn't really want to anymore.

"Then, let's see if it can resist my offense," Cartman said putting the lube away and leading his cock to Stan's entrance. He immediately pushed inside, catching Stan off guard a little but it was pretty naïve to believe Cartman would actually ask anyway.

Stan moaned intensively, digging his fingers into the blanket beneath him, "Yeah, faster!"

Cartman obeyed his wish as best as he could, putting his hands on Stan's hips to support his thrusting. Stan's pleasant moans sounded through the entire house, leaving not one living being inside uncertain of the hot scenes taking place in the teenager's bedroom.

Cartman gave Stan's ass a little spank and continued to hump the quarterback who was, despite of his earlier orgasm, rock-hard again. That didn't stay unnoticed by Cartman who slowed down his pace to let his hands travel down Stan's sides to his penis.

"Oh," Stan moaned, now not just enjoying the thrusts but also Cartman's hand pumping his erection.

"I'm gonna come," Stan gasped.

"Me too," Cartman responded and soon enough shot his semen inside of Stan. The additional thrill of Cartman's orgasm brought Stan over the edge, too, spilling his seed all over Cartman's hand and the blanket.

Cartman collapsed onto Stan laying his arms around him limply. Both panted heavily and enjoyed the afterglow.

"So... I guess... I have won then... right?" Cartman asked.

Stan looked at him and smiled, "Yeah." The two of them then fell asleep in each others arms.

A few hours later Stan woke up finding his partner gone. He stood up, got dressed and slowly made his way downstairs. Cartman sat in the living room watching television and eating chips.

"Hey Cartman, who won the game?" Cartman turned around, "Huh? Oh, the Broncos won 40-35 or something, I think."

"What? Aw crap and I missed it. 40-35 you said? The game must've been good," went up to the couch.

"Yeah, I think they said something about one of the best games in history," Cartman said.

Stan sighed, "Thanks a lot, Cartman."

Cartman's answer was drowned out by the doorbell.

Stan opened the door and saw Kyle and Kenny. "Oh, hey dudes, how was your date?"

"Great!" Kenny said.

"Yeah, and here," Kyle said holding Stan's discarded jeans and boxers, wet from the snow.

"Oh, uh, thanks," Stan took them.

"So it happened again, didn't it?" Kyle asked laughing.

"Uh, yeah," Stan said turning around to look at Cartman, who didn't even bother to shift his gaze from the television, innocently eating his chips.


Thanks for reading :) ... rushed, wasn't it? I don't really like it because I think I could've done better. Well, I hope you liked it anyway and please review :)