The year 2000. Fifty years since the PRESIDENT signed a BILL making everyone with superpowers either an EMPLOYEE of the GOVERNMENT or an OUTLAW. MY name's KRAVEN THE HUNTER, and the government PAYS me to hunt down the STUPID PUNKS who think THEY can dodge that LAW.

I LOVE my job.
Kraven crouched behind the stone gargoyle, watching the woman down below walk hurriedly to her car, occasionally glancing anxiously behind her. She was tall and red-haired, and the rather voluminous dress concealed an iron physique. Right now she looked scared for her life.

The reason was revealed an instant later, when two men stepped out of the shadows. They wore ski masks, and walked with the easy stride of a predator who has no fear of their prey escaping or fighting back. One carried a switchblade, while the other held a baseball bat. The woman fumbled with her car keys, before dropping them, and pressing her back against her car, as if trying to push herself through the side and to safety.

The man carrying the baseball bat began to say something, but was interrupted by a sudden orange and blue blur, which crashed into him, lifting him bodily off his feet, and slamming him into a parked car some distance away. An instant later, a figure wearing a black spandex costume with red highlights leapt over a parked car and kicked the man with the switchblade in the face. He collapsed to the pavement.

I recognize HIM. Calls himself the NIGHT-THRASHER. STUPID little vigilante. BUT he's supposed to be GOOD. VERY good. Worthy PREY for KRAVEN the HUNTER, then.

"Are you all right ma'am?" Night Thrasher asked the woman, as the blur resolved itself into a teenager wearing a ridiculous blue and orange costume. He was grinning with the look of an adrenaline junky who had- well, who had just crashed head first into a mugger after flying out of the darkness.

He's even WORSE. Calls himself SPEEDBALL. ABSOLUTELY useless in a FIGHT with ANYBODY who knows what they're DOING. He absorbs KINETIC energy, though, which means that he's NOT really in my AREA of EXPERTISE.

"Better than you gentlemen will be soon," responded the woman. Her hand jerked up, and a bolt of electricity leapt from her wrist, striking Speedball in the chest. He fell to the ground, as Night Thrasher leapt out of the way, behind another parked car. Kraven was moving in that instant, even as the woman shed the bulky dress, revealing the form fitting black uniform beneath it.

Kraven landed catlike behind Night Thrasher, who was leaping to his feet. Meanwhile, Speedball was trying to clamber to his feet, only to be struck by another jolt of electricity from the woman. Kraven grabbed Night Thrasher by the neck and slammed him up against the car. "Here's the deal," he rumbled, "You and me. No holds barred, no interference from my team. You have a thirty second head start. Go." He released his hold on Night Thrasher's throat and started counting. Night Thrasher took ten seconds to catch his breath, and then squatted, thrusting one foot out at Kraven's left knee. Kraven sidestepped, grabbing Night Thrasher's leg, and slamming him into the car by it.

"That was stupid," he said, kicking Night Thrasher in the ribs as he started rolling to his feet. "Now you don't get any head start. Get back up on your feet." Night Thrasher did so, and promptly punched Kraven in the gut. Hard muscle stopped some of the impact, but Kraven still doubled over as Night Thrasher kicked him in the face. He stumbled back against the car, grinning wildly, despite his clearly broken nose. He caught Night Thrasher's next two blows, one in each hand, and with a grunt, flipped Night Thrasher over his head, to land heavily on his back on the asphalt of the parking lot. Night Thrasher climbed to his feet again, but slowly this time. He was also coughing, and spit out blood. Still, he leapt to the attack again, and the next few minutes were a frantic exchange of blows, until finally Kraven grabbed hold of Night Thrasher by his neck and leg, lifted him above his head, and slammed him down onto the ground. This time Night Thrasher made no attempt to climb back to his feet. "Black Widow?" He asked, throwing Night Thrasher over his shoulder.

The red haired woman looked up, hitting Speedball with another jolt of electricity from the device on her wrist as she did so. "That last was as near to full juice as I could get without killing him," she replied in a still rather thick Russian accent. "He should remain unconscious for about twelve hours. And please, Sergei, call me Natasha"

Black Widow. She's my SECOND in command. She's also EVERY man's DREAM. Except the GAY ones. The only TROUBLE is, she DIDN'T just get that NAME because her FIRST collar in this JOB was the FLY. Most of the MEN who return her ADVANCES end up with a broken HEART or a broken NECK.

Kraven turned to the man that Speedball had attacked. Or rather, now, the men. The two identical men- not that you could tell through the ski masks- stood up, and then one of them seemed to slip back into the other. "Madrox?" Kraven asked

"Nothing broken, Kraven. Although I'd like to point out that I'm not really the best person for bait. One of these days someone's going to notice that I duplicate when they kick me in the face. And then where will we be?"

James Madrox- the MULTIPLE Man. He can DUPLICATE himself any TIME anything HITS him. That MAKES him a one man ARMY. He has some TROUBLE making DECISIONS, though. He MAKES me nervous, because I NEVER know if I'm talking to HIM or one of his DUPES.

"I told you, we didn't have time to requestion any agents for bait. It took me five days of tracking them to figure out they'd be in this neighborhood tonight, and I wasn't about to hold off while we waited for the request to go up through the bureaucrats, and let them get away. Machine Man?"

"I did not sustain any damage, fleshy leader. All of my various components appear to be in perfect working order. I am, after all, considerably more durable than you squishy organics."

MACHINE Man. He only got PUT on the team because the ANDROID rights groups were protesting DISCRIMINATION. But he's GOT more TOOLS in him than a SWISS army knife, and he's got no COMPUNCTIONS about using them however he's ORDERED to.

"All right. Machine Man, take Speedball. There's a designated SHIELD pick-up point about five blocks south of here, and they hate coming down to earth anywhere else. Let's get moving."

SHIELD. America's TOP espionage and SPEC-OPS organization. Ever since the SOVIET Union fell, they've been MOSTLY concerned with enforcing and REGULATING the SUPER Human Registration and DRAFT act. And ever since Nick FURY retired, they're gone STRAIGHT to HELL. In a GODDAMN handbasket. Can't EVEN deploy a team to take down a super powered TERRORIST without triple AUTHORIZATION from half a DOZEN officials. Transport's EASIER. Just get the PRISONER to a designated pick-up POINT and they'll bring them up to the big PRISON in the sky. Most of the AGENTS are still pretty good guys though.

"Geeze, Kraven," said one of the SHIELD agents, clipping a collar around Speedball's neck. "This makes what, eight this month? Nine depending on how you count that conjoined twin. You trying to put yourselves out of business?"

"Not going to happen," said a Madrox clone, wandering by. Madrox Prime was talking animatedly on a cell phone "I saw a thing on the Discovery Channel the other night. The big brains figure that, not counting us mutants, the number of superhumans doubles every twenty years."

"Twenty years and seven months," said Machine Man absently. One of his eyes had extended from its socket, and he was examing Night Thrasher's suit. "Why on earth would he have thought that the red highlights were a good idea? They only serve to increase visibility. But then, much of humanity's so-called 'fashion' remains a mystery to me. For example, I can still not imagine why Kraven would wish to wear a vest made out of dead animals."

"Right. Evey twenty years and seven months. So it's always on the rise, and that means there's always going to be new idiots who think they can dodge the law. And considering we aren't on salary with benefits like you SHIELD jocks, only makes sense to take as many as we can. When can we pick up the pay?"

"Sorry, SHIELD's back to not handling that again this week," the agent grinned sheepishly. SHIELD's responsibilities in these matters was constantly shifting back and forth with the Super Human Registration and Draft Agency. "I'll write you up a receipt for these two, and you'll have to head down to SHRADA to cash it."

Madrox Prime had finished his conversation on the cell phone. "Hey, Kraven! Those twins I met at that society thing last week? They agreed to a double date, but only if you're one of the men, not just two mes. Ah, well, no accounting for taste, I guess."

MOST countries, the fact that I enjoy HUNTING the most DANGEROUS game would make me a CRIMINAL or a FREAK. Here I'm one of the MOST famous men in the country, and the WOMEN regularly throw their UNDERWEAR at me in the STREET. GOD, I LOVE America.