Title: Box Of Memories

Rating: M

Summary: Hotch walks away before the pain gets too much

Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds or its characters. I do own the plot, though

Status: One-Shot

Inspiration: A song called It's Too Late by Evermore

She looks beautiful in sleep.

You want to stay, to watch her some more. But you can't.

You have to go now.

You have to go before she wakes up.

You remember.

"What are we playing at?" She asked you. You had no answer.

You remember her face, her body. What she was wearing. But you can't remember what you were feeling.

You remember everything.

But you remember nothing.

You remember the first time you went out.

You remember the first time she asked you to get a drink. Just the two of you. You were shocked.

You were shocked because you enjoyed yourself.

You were shocked because it was the most fun you'd had in ages.

You enjoyed yourself.

You remember.

"Are you okay?" She'd asked.

You didn't have the heart to tell her no.

That no, you weren't okay.

You remember the first time.

It was beautiful.

To you, it was the best.

The best night in your life.

The best time of your life.

You wish you could just go back to that night.

Before it all became too much.

"Five victims. All brunette."

You no longer see victims.

All you see is her.

All you see is her face, her body.

There's nobody else.

It wasn't like this before. Not with Haley, not with anybody else.

Not that there was anybody else.

You remember the night it all became impossible.

She was in danger.

You knew that.

You wanted to hurt him.

She knew that.

You wish you could go back to that night.

The night before someone died because of you.

Because you were too emotional.

All you could see was the gun pointed to her head and her.

You didn't see the person with the gun.

You didn't see the person that had family, a mother, a father.

All you saw was the enemy.

He died that night.

It was your fault.

Her fault.

You'd gotten too emotional.

You blow a kiss goodbye.

Then the fights started.

You wanted to go back to that night before the crack's started to appear.

Screaming.

You tuned out.

You didn't sleep together that night. She went back to her place.

It was the first time that happened.

The cracks starting showing at work.

You snapped at people, for no reason. You just didn't have the strength to play nice.

That was when you realised.

When you realised it was over.

You couldn't tell her. You didn't have the heart.

You wish you had now. It would've been easier.

You feel your heart breaking.

You've never felt this way before. Not when Haley left. Never.

You take a deep breath. You feel tears well up in your eyes. You blink them back.

You remember.

"What's going on between you two?" Morgan asked.

You knew he knew. You just didn't want him to mention it.

But he did.

"Nothing."

You tried to deny it.

He didn't believe you.

You could see it in his eyes.

You remember.

You went out to dinner. She ordered her favourite.

You wanted to talk. You desperately wanted to talk.

But you couldn't.

You didn't want to see her heart break.

But you knew it would.

At least you wouldn't be there to see it.

You walk out the door.

But before you do you leave something.

You leave a box. A box full of memories, memoirs.

A box of memories, lying on the floor.

A box of memories.

She looks beautiful in sleep.