Diamond in the Rough
Synopsis: An Aquabats fanfiction. Eaglebones meets a rocker chick (Genavive 'Gen' Diamante) who can play a rather intense bass solo. She also has a sonic voice; a technique to disarm her enemies. Her 'je ne sais quois' makes her a valuable ally as well as diplomat.
Chapter 1-On the Road
The Battle Tram was once again and the Aquabats were feeling satisfied with their recent concert. Most of the money had gone to charity and other beneficial not-for-profits along their route. The rest went to maintaining the cost of living, whether it was keeping the tire-pressure in the Tram up or making certain they were fed, hydrated and their clothes were laundered every weekend.
Jimmy and the other Aquabats were beginning to feel tired and found there was a truck stop not far from their next destination, Albaquirky. The Bats all settled down for the night with a typical bed time story from Jimmy. This one was about The Pudding Snatcher, the fiendish gnome that comes to life only at night to satisfy it's desire for sweets, mainly that of puddings. Often, he is called the Flan-napper, due to the fact that he stuffs himself with as much of the rich Latin dessert as he can. Knowing this is only a kid's tale, the Bats slumber throughout the night. Tomorrow will be another day of singing, dancing and showboating for the masses.
Eaglebones was the first to awaken. Ricky had rececently stocked the kitchen with healthy foods and snacks. Eaglebones staggered to the refrigerator and got himself Greek yogurt with blueberries on the bottom, poured himself some orange juice and watched the other Bats trudge into the kitchen. Fairly after having breakfast, he became extremely chipper.
'Great day, isn't it ? Been nicer since the temps have cooled down. What do you thik Albaquirky will be like ?', he said, between satisfied bites and a big glug of orange juice.
'Dunno, but don't ya think it's been kinda boring without any monsters to fight recently ?', MC Bat Commander asked.
'Yeah, I've been kinda bored. I really wanna hit something, and the punching bag in the training room ain't cuttin' it.', Crash admitted.
'I wouldn't go that far, Crash. ', Jimmy said, diverting his attention to a greasy spoon on the side of the road called Larry's.
'I'm starving ! Anyone want to try Larry's out ?', he questioned.
'It's probably a good idea for us to refuel before we get moving again. We're not too far from our concert designation, after all.', Ricky chimed in cheerily. MC Bat Commander and the others agreed. It didn't look so bad after all, despite the trailer park it was contained in. Some of the best diners they had eaten in had the same sort of vibe about them, and the food was always unbelievably good (not to mention fattening).
McLarson had pondered about the Flan-napper, wondering if he was real just like the Floating Eye of Death. The whole notion of it seemed really idiotic anyway. Then again, the Eye wasn't a kid's tale. He didn't let his mind become too distracted with the probability or possibility of a Flan-napper, if it indeed existed. Instead, he downed the blintzes on his plate and let out a raucous belch.
'Man, I am too full to even move. These blintzes just KOed my hunger. Maybe a little nap before the concert wouldn't hurt ?', Crash said. The others agreed and upon returning to the Tram, Jimmy placed it into autopilot again and the five of them rested for the remainder of the trip.
Chapter 2-Genevive Diamante
Gen had always been different than other women, especially considering her talent. She was a wicked fast bass player and her band members the Fatales knew the bass held unhindered power. They didn't know this but she had a sonic voice she could use to disarm enemies if need be. She had used this once before when she saw an old lady getting mugged on the street. Typically, she would've never gotten involved, but this ability was mysterious as well as helpful. She didn't know where it came from or why, but she didn't question it. She used it for the benefit of others rather than to cause the audience members at the Fatales' concerts to go deaf. She wondered if she could ever use this power for her benefit as well as her charisma and diplomacy. Secretly, she wanted to be an Aquabat and had even sewn her own costume, right down to the smallest detail. It was her ultimate dream, but sadly, the Aquabats seemed to be a 'gentlemen only' superhero group.
The next morning Gen couldn't believe her eyes. It was the Bats' BattleTram. She had seen this time and time again, even in her dreams. She felt like a kid in a candy shop and desperately wanted to try her uniform out to see how it fit. Also, she hoped she could impress the Bats in preparation to become an honorary member. She knew she had no training, but she had plenty of pluck and spunk as well as determiniation and drive. If nothing else, those qualities alone, she felt, would impress the pants off of just about anyone.
Chapter 3-The Mysterious Gnosher
During the concert, when the Bats turned the performance into a sing-a-long, Gen knew every song they had sung. Secretly, she had purchased every album the Bats had recorded to date and was a covert fan of their's. If Gen's best friends from the band had seen her they probably would've laughed at her fangirl tendencies. Before Gen knew what had happened, she was pulled on stage by the Commander and she belted out the tunes with gusto. Eaglebones was impressed by her control and eleoqution. Few singers singing rock n' roll were ever understood, but her diction was perfect. He wondered if she could play an instrument, but that question would have to wait until later.
Meanwhile outside a nuclear waste facility...
In the green ooze, something unusual began forming. It had been the once discarded body of a police officer that had been in the wrong place at the wrong time. Bizarrely, and even slightly eerily, the nuclear waste reincarnated him. Certainly he was no longer his handsome self. There were some parts hanging from sinews and arms that were double jointed that weren't so naturally. Bucky Hobart didn't care though. He was starving and all that was on his mind were sweets, wherever he could find them.
Eaglebones and Gen talked for hours after the concert. The two of them had so much in common, including their adultaion and adoration of music. There was a bass guitar in the Tram that Eaglebones had won from a Gibson Guitar contest long ago. It was a Les Paul, glorious, veneer sheened and immaculate. Gen was almost afraid to touch it since it was so sacred. But before she knew it, she had gone into her typical musical induced trance and began plucking out a monster bass line. Eaglebones awed, thrilled, clapped and whistled.
'You must be in a band of some kind !', he complimented.
'Yes, in fact I am. I am the bass player of the Femmes. Sort of ironic, considering I am their leader, and main vocalist.', she said, lowering her head coyly. Eaglebones was quite handsome and she had been caught by his chocolate, hypnotising eyes. He couldn't help but feel attracted to her as well, an instant magnetism that only artists could truly comprehend. While they were chatting away, laughing and joking about like children, there was an odd, dishelved and somewhat scruffy looking shadow lurching back and forth into the food court at the concert. He was eating everything in sight. As it grew closer, Eaglebones and Gen could see it was a zombie cop with a lust for sugary snacks.
'We have to stop him before he eats everything that isn't nailed down.', Gen sugguested. Unfortunately, the officer had begun even to eat the posts that secured the tarps over the temporary booths and happy concert goers became scared, running from the freakish cop as fast as their legs could carry them. Eaglebones and Gen began playing their guitars, zapping the mysterious gnosher into dust without breaking a sweat. Gen, curious about what had animated the poor, hapless cop, went to investigate if there were any clues about his enigmatic regeneration.
'This gnosher, it seems was brought to life by radioactive waste.', she said, pointing at the trail of obvious lime-green glowing fluid.
'Pssht. Lame. How cliche is that ?!', Eaglebones remarked. Then he paused, feeling as if this was only the first zombie that they would see unless something was done.
'You know that factory,Orborman Corp ?', Gen questioned. Eaglebones had come across an article about how much 'safer' and 'economical' it was only a few weeks earlier. His mention of it to the team was dismissed quickly once any mention of food, videogames, paintballing or other sweaty male bonding activities were sugguested.
'Yes, but Jimmy was the only one who took me seriously. That is until we came across a Fry's Electronic's Store during our US Tour, which, we're still rolling on.' Eaglebones said. He slapped his palm to his head. He couldn't believe how moronic he had been. He and the band were on a schedule, and they were probably in the lounge asking where he had gone to. But, he knew he could use Gen's help.
'Do you want to be an honorary Aquabat ?', he asked. She was already dressed perfectly for the part, and she looked dynamite. Eaglebones couldn't help staring a bit at her perfect curves and lovely hourglass figure. Shaking his head to focus his thoughts on the present, he asked her if she had her own transportation.
'Yes, why wouldn't I ? It's a Vespa. I'm sure I can keep up with the Tram. It's got quite a bit of torque, I modified it for that very reason.', she said. Eaglebones was beginning to believe that there wasn't anything that this woman, whom would soon become known as 'Diamond' couldn't do.
Chapter 4-An Armada of Flan-Nappers and Sugar Addicts
Oborman Corp had been dumping nuclear waste close to a non-disclosed area where mobsters of old had dumped corpses of non-cooperative mouthpieces to the mob, or tax evaders, or ruffians that simply got caught on the wrong side of whatever circumstance to land them in that retention pond. Oborman didn't know that the waste itself was reanimating these corpses. Apparently whatever was in the waste had the effect of insatiable hunger, particularly that for confectionaries and indulgences.
'Do you think we'll be enough to hold back this zombie hoarde, EB ?', Gen questioned, curiously.
'EB ? I like the sound of that. I've actually radioed the others back at the Tram. We can split up.', Eaglebones stated. Gen actually wanted to fight by Eaglebones' side, so this deflated her elation only momentarily. Moments before the hoarde began forming, the Aquabats were there to defeat them, mainly with the power of Eaglebones' axe. Using her diplomacy, Gen was able to convince Oberman Corps that dumping the waste had caused the armies of undead that were beginning to rise. They shut down operations and agreed to swith to heathier sources of power with fewer emissions but the last cascade of waste had trickled down the opposite side of the factory and into a graveyard not far away. Gen hadn't seen this unfortunate series of events take place, so she felt that the Bats' work was done for the day. Little did she know that she would be proving herself to the Bats once again.
The Bats were supposed to be heading to California when a news reporter suddenly interrupted their regularly scheduled cartoons with an update.
'Aw, come on ! The episode was just getting good. I was for certain El Horror would be foiled.', Crash said.
'Horror is always foiled by the Silver Crusader though. That's the whole point of Cosmonaughts.', Jimmy said.
'Yeesh, spoiler alert much !', Crash griped, shaking his head left and right. Spoilers or not, Cosmonaughts had become a fixation in their lives. Eaglebones hadn't been talking much and it wasn't like him not to be so contemplative.
'Why the long face, buddy ?', the Commander questioned, realizing Falconhawk wasn't his usual, upbeat self.
'I think I met my soulmate back there. Problem is...I didn't ask her for her phone number or email or ANYTHING !', Eaglebones said, nearly breaking down.
'Oh, man...Bummage.', Ricky Fitness chimed in.
'Not helping, Rick.', Commander fired back, reprovingly. The Commander directed Falconhawks' attention to the crisis back in Albyquirky.
'She may still be there. So you can exchange information that way. This time, don't let the opportunity slip by. And good luck.', Commander said, as they drove back to the place where they had fought the sugar-driven batallion the first time.
The corporation was shut down, but despite that, undead confectionary seekers were starting to head toward the Battle Tram. Crash had flan in his possession.
'The Flan-Napper does exist ! Jimmy was right !', he thought to himself. Then again, the Napper hadn't been a zombie brought into existence by nuclear waste. So, impulsively, to protect his flan stash, the lug grew huge in size, and bowled over about a dozen or more zombies back into their graves so they could get some peace.
But this didn't do the trick. Gen had seen the alert herself so she sped to the scene on her Vespa. Istead of taking the direct approach and blasting the creatures to dust, she sang an ancient song she was familiar with somehow. This particular melody was one that could send the undead back into their graves and give them much needed peace. The song, in an ancient language unsung and unspoken until now was translated thus;
Return, return from whence you came
Back to the comfort of your grave
To the cold ground you call your own
The dewy sod you call your home
Close and shut those sleepy eyes
What dreams may come when down you lie
Return, return, spirit take wing
Soul, fly, flee, to you I sing
Return, return oh wandering soul
To your new home, and again be whole
The army retreated and even buried themselves in their proper crypts. It was somewhat morbid, frightening but mystifying all the same.
'Diamond you were awesome !', Eaglebones said. He gave her a high-five to show his support. The other Bats were just as impressed with her, and Eaglebones gave them the rundown on their cooperation with the sweet eaters earlier.
'At least that is over with ! I'm beat, and it's late. We need to be heading to California. Glad to have had your help, Diamond. You are a worthy ally and an astonishing singer. If you ever want to join us again, we'd be more than happy to have you as part of our team.', the Commander said, patting her on the back. Eaglebones and Diamond quickly exchanged information and he did something unexpected. He kissed her cheek.
'For everything.', he stated, sweetly. Diamond blushed hotly and the band teased him immaturely, nudging him like schoolkids.
'Guys, come on. You're making me look bad !', he whined slightly. With that, Diamond said her goodbyes and returned to Albyquirky.
Epilogue
The whole team had been exhausted from fighting leigions of sweet-toothed undead. The strains of Lovers Loving Love played softly in Eaglebones' mind as he drifted off to sleep. Maybe someday he would be reuinted with Gen ? Who knows ? All that was important was that the concerts were going along magnificently and seeing everyone's face light up when their favorite songs were sung. They all adored the sing-along portion of the concert. To them, it was sacred, meaningful and worthwhile and energized them for their next destination. For the time being, villainy had been put to a stop and the music played on. They would still roll on defeating whatever evil faced them but for the present, music and cammeradery mad their lives a near-perfect paradise.
The End