Finally reaching the Akatsuki's main base, I let my guard down. That last mission had left me warn out, but I still couldn't help feel elated after it. It was simple really, just kill someone and get money in return. Those were my favorite type of missions; I mean who doesn't love money. And getting it in return for doing something that I love, well that's just a plus.
As I was walking towards Leaders office, I heard the familiar bickering of my fellow criminals. Kakuzu and Hidan. My relationship with them was complicated to say the least. If I was going on a particularly hard mission, they would accompany me. Or if they needed some extra help, which they would always deny, I would go with them. I tried to stay away from the duo when I wasn't working with them, simply because the Joshinist made me feel weird when I was around him. It wasn't like he intimidated me, or scared me or anything like that. No, it was more of a sickness, something fluttered inside of my stomach every time I was around him. I was able to calm it down at times, but only when I was in battle. Or when he annoyed me, which was basically all the time. That feeling, the feeling of slight nausea, was something that I used to feel a lot when I was younger.
Rounding the corner, I was headed straight towards the 'Zombie Combo' as Kisame would say. They had just came from the leaders office by the looks of it, seeing as how this was the only hallway leading to it and it was a complete dead end other than his office door. I'm sure it was a bale mission, like mine had been. Kakuzu was as crazy about money too, something that we both had in common. I was forced to pass them by as I headed towards my destination. I decided that I wasn't going to make eye contact with the silver haired male, seeing as how it would only cause my stomach to go into knots. Unfortunately, Kakuzu was the treasurer, which meant that I needed to give him the money I had just obtained. I stopped when they got somewhat close and reached inside my bag for the beautiful strips of paper.
"Back so soon?" Hidan smirked at me. I nodded my head in response.
"It wasn't that challenging, he was a prince or something, no ninja ability what-so-ever." I almost yawned thinking of the boring mission. "Here, Kakuzu." I handed him the bills, and kept my voice at its naturally stoic tone.
"Good. Thank you, Ryuu." He said slowly, before taking off down the hallway again. Hidan winked at me before continuing after his partner. Somehow, I figured that he knew about my feelings, even if I refused to accept them myself.
I reported to leader before going to hang out in my room for a little while. I wasn't tired; in fact I was a bit wired. I knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep even if I tried my hardest. After going through every book I had, looking through every scroll I owned, practiced my time freezing Jutsu, and throwing multiple kunai's at the ceiling, I was officially bored. Sighing I jumped off of my bed and sauntered towards the doorway. Maybe I could go bug Kisame or something.
As I opened my door, someone right across the hall did as well. Deidara gave me a small smile, and I froze a bit before returning one. Call me crazy, but apparently my nerves liked him as well seeing as my stomach did a little summersault in response to his cute smile. It hadn't always been this way. Deidara was my first friend here and I hadn't thought of him anything more than a brother, but as we got closer I started to realize that I liked him a lot more than I would let anyone know.
"Hey, Ryuu." He waved a bit as we both fell into step with one another. "How did your mission go, un?"
"Oh, fine I suppose. It wasn't very eventful," I sighed, looking down at my normal black, fitted, outfit.
"I suppose you're bored too then, yeah." He laughed. I couldn't help but laugh as well, seeing as how he always knew what I was feeling.
We walked down the hallways for a bit, debating what we should do to ease our growing boredom. Finally settling on pulling a few pranks on the other members, we set off on our quest for mischief. By the end of the day, we had managed 'misplace' Kisame's pet fish, steal Tobi's teddy bear, water Konan's paper flowers, place a 'caution, I bite' sticker on Zetzu's back, and fill Itachi's room with stuffed weasels. The only people that we had let slide were Kakuza, who was too busy counting his money to be bothered, Leader, who was shut up in his office like always, and Hidan who had been doing his daily ritual. After our tiring day of almost getting killed, Deidara and I started to head back towards our rooms.
As we walked passed Hidan's room, I noticed that his door was open. I had never actually been inside of any of the other member's rooms before, other than Deidara's on occasion and today while we were pranking. So naturally I leaned in to take a peek inside. Deidara nudged my shoulder and pointed over to the very back wall where Hidan's scythe was sitting.
"What do you think, yeah?" He asked jutting his chin out towards the weapon, in a silent dare. I debated it for a few moments, looking from the scythe, to Deidara, then back into the room. It seemed as if Hidan was nowhere in sight.
"You're on." I shook his hand. It was only natural that I took the bet even though it was a complete suicide mission. Hidan was one of the three that we hadn't gotten too, which meant that it was time for a bit of fun.
"Deal," The blonde boy stepped back as I snuck quietly into the previously uncharted room.
My guard was up to its fullest, just because I couldn't see Hidan didn't mean that he wasn't in the room. I knew that I couldn't use my time freeze jutsu, because even if I did touch the scythe, no one would witness it since they would be frozen. I was almost there, a mere two inches away when a dark shadow fell over me. I cursed the death Gods for such rotten luck, and froze in place. I already knew who it was, feeling the dark aura that was coming from the being.
"What the fuck are you doing in my room, bitch?! You're interrupting my ritual." Hidan yelled, but it wasn't as loud as I was expecting. It didn't even sound like he was that angry for some reason.
I turned around slowly and it seemed like time stopped. Hidan was less than a foot away from my face with one of his signature smirks on his face. His light pink eyes were glowing in amusement, and it didn't even look like he was angry. In fact, he looked more amused than anything else.
"I'll say this once, Ryuu. Get out of my room," Hidan whispered, before slamming his hands on the wall beside my head making me jump a bit. He didn't have to tell me twice, as soon as he backed up a bit I was off and speeding down the hallway. I didn't see Deidara anywhere which probably meant that he had gone back to his room.
When I got close to my room, I slowed down and started to mentally kick myself. How could I act so stupid?! Was it the fact that he had gotten closer to me than he ever had been before? I didn't know, all I knew was that the butterflies in my stomach had gone crazy which in turn made me act like an idiot.
I opened the door to my room only to see Deidara lounging on my bed. It wasn't an unusual sight, and I had actually gotten used to it over the years. It was nice to have someone there at times, and for that I was grateful for Dei. I'm not going to lie and say that I had buried my feelings for my best friend; the nausea was still ever present every time he was around. I was just good at hiding it since I had been practicing for so long. I really needed someone to talk to but I knew I couldn't take my boy issues to Deidara. It would be too awkward, plus every time I talked about the silver haired Jashinist, I always would sense some kind of strong feeling from Deidara. I also knew that I couldn't just leave everything bottled up inside forever. Nothing good ever came of that.
"Dei, can I talk to you about something?" I said sitting down cross-legged beside him. I knew that this was going to be hard; I wasn't one to pour out my feelings to anyone. Even to my best friend.
"Sure, un." He looked over at me concerned. I could tell he knew something was up; his eyes spoke a thousand words.
"I have a problem," I paused taking a deep breath before continuing. "I like someone, or well two people and I'm not really sure if it's anything serious or not. One of them I'm really close with, but the other is more of a," I had to stop and think for a moment. What was Hidan anyway? We weren't close enough to be friends, but we were closer than acquaintances. "Comrade."
"So you're asking me on advice to as which person you should get with, un?" Deidara asked. I could tell by his voice that something was wrong; it was a mixture of sadness and jealousy. Why would be jealous? Don't you only feel that when the person you like, likes someone else? Deidara couldn't actually like me back, could he? I would always send him hints to judge his reaction, but he would never react in the way I had expected. Either he was really stupid, or just an expert at hiding his emotions.
"I suppose so," I finally answered.
"I'm not really the person to be asking, Ryuu, yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand in discomfort.
"Please, Dei. You're my best friend." I begged. He looked at me strangely, but then finally nodded his head for me to continue. "The comrade, well I'm not really sure why I like him. I just do. Maybe it's the danger that I always feel when I'm around him or the excitement when I watch him engaged in battle. I'm not really sure. He just makes me feel sick to my stomach, like a thousand tiny butterflies are in there. I don't know why though, he's crude and disrespectful and ignores me at times, plus I think he may be a bit bipolar. Things that normally would drive me up a wall. But, he's different around me at times. He doesn't yell at me like he does the other members, and when he says my name he doesn't say it sarcastically."
"So, you don't like his personality, but you like the feelings that he gives you when you're around him, un?" Deidara clarified.
"I guess so," I thought about it for a moment.
"And the friend?" Deidara said quietly. I had specifically saved him for last. I wanted to get everything out about Hidan just in case Deidara didn't return my feelings and everything got awkward.
"The friend," I smiled at him. "I've known him for as long as I've been here. At first, he was like a brother to me, but then things started to change. I would notice things, small things, about the way his eyes would sparkle every time he smiled his very rare smiles. The way he would always rub his eyes like a child when he would wake up. He makes me laugh all the time and we always get in trouble together. This 'friend' is sweet and respectful towards me and I know that I can take anything to him whenever I need help. He makes me feel like I'm wanted." I finished, hoping that he understood what I was trying to say.
Deidara's face was blank, not allowing me to see what he was thinking. He even had his eyes closed so either he was deep in thought or he was put to sleep by me pouring out my heart. Oh how romantic. Finally, after some agonizingly slow minutes the blonde bomber opened his eyes.
"So, with this information that you gave me, I know who the comrade is. Crude, disrespectful, bipolar, and treats you different than the others, it has to be Hidan, un." Deidara sat up and looked me dead in the eyes. He had his hair all the way up so I was able to see both of his eyes, which was a rare sight. They showed hurt and jealousy, but then started to swell into something along the lines of mischievous. "The friend made me think for a little bit, but I was able to narrow it down quite a bit until I found only one possible person. You say he respects you, you've known him for as long as you've been here and you can go to him with anything, yeah. Either I'm going to make a huge fool of myself, or this has been a long time coming, un." He whispered the last sentence so quiet that I had to lean close to his face to even make out what he was saying.
I didn't realize what he was planning until I felt a pair of soft, warm lips on my own. It was brief and light, almost like a butterfly kiss, but it felt like an eternity to me. All too soon it was over and Deidara slid off my bed.
"Goodnight, Ryuu." Deidara said. "Remember that whoever you choose, I'll still always be here for you, un." He smiled and then closed my door softly.
Bringing my hand up to my lips, I couldn't help but still feel the tingling sensation of the kiss. It spoke so many things that I had never heard uttered, and probably never would, from Deidara. I had felt the sparks that had long been forgotten in my life, it was almost as shocking as the butterflies I got around Hidan. Those words that Deidara had said before he left were like a double ended sword. I now knew his feelings for me, but he also knew that I liked someone else. He shouldn't be okay with the fact that I could possibly go to Hidan and not him, he should be fighting for me and not sitting in the background waiting for things to happen. Is that what I wanted? To be fought over? No, all I wanted was to be accepted and loved, and I knew that Deidara was willing to give that to me. Hidan on the other hand was a wild card. Would he be willing to let me into his heart? Or would he leave me out in the cold?
Only time would tell, I suppose.