Disclaimer: Not mine, Mr Andersons. This is the 2009 very, very late Christmas fic from myself. Yes, I know its February, but new job and family issues delayed me posting this…. Plus the fact I had three different Christmas fics started but this was the only one that I finished and was happy with. Please enjoy it and once again, I use Australian English. Oh, and this is for zeilfanaat who's recent reviews and encouragement made me get off my behind and get this posted….. AM, February 2010.
A Secret Revealed
By Angel Mouse
23rd December
The drive from the airport was currently being made in silence, but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence, just the gentle comfort of good friends or in this close, extremely close brothers. They had flown into Melbourne, Australia, that morning for the day and were looking forward to a beautiful summer's day in a warm and friendly city. They had come to the city for the day, to shop and other things, but mainly to spend time with each other as they didn't get to do that as often as they used to any more.
The silence had stretched out for about an hour or so into the drive when finally Scott broke it. Something had been bothering his brother and it was more than time to find out about it.
"What's been on your mind John, you've been awfully quiet since you got home the other day. More than normal I mean." John didn't answer for a long time and Scott began to get worried, finally when he did speak, his voice was quiet and subdued.
"Scott, I need you to do me a favour while we're here today." Scott frowned, but was quick to answer. John never asked for anything and when he did, it was usually with a great deal of reluctance.
"Of course, anything for you John, you know that. Heaven and Earth remember." John flashed a shadow of a smile at his brother and fell silent again. Just as Scott was about to ask what was wrong again he spoke.
"We have to go to the Royal Prince Alfred Hospital. I have an appointment with a specialist. He needs to remove a lump under my arm that I found last month. He had taken a biopsy then but there was a mix up at the lab, so now he just wants to remove the whole thing and get it over with straight away."
Scott was floored.
John had found a lump. Last month. And he had said nothing to Scott.
Finally, he found his voice as he absently took the turn off to head to the hospital John mentioned, obscurely glad that they knew where all major hospitals in all major cities were roughly located. His whole being was on autopilot right now as he focussed solely on his brother, but his eyes never left the road.
"Okay, right. So, what did the doctor say?" He focussed on keeping his composure and being there for his brother. But inside his heart and mind were going a million miles an hour as he absorbed his brother's words.
"He's 99.9% sure it's just a benign cyst, but the lab techs screwed up the biopsy, so instead of having another one, he's going to remove the whole thing and get that biopsy done today."
John's tone sounded relieved and he admitted to himself for the first time he was feeling a bit lighter about the whole thing, being able to finally say something was a relief. It had been weighing heavily on his soul for a little while now.
"Well, that's a good thing then. We defy the odds all the time. Just wish you had have told me sooner Johnny." There was a slight hint of rebuke in Scott's tone, but also love and understanding. John understood completely why it was there though. He would be feeling the same if it was one of his brothers keeping something like that from him.
"I know Scott, but I was scared. I didn't want to be molly coddled by all of you once you found out. You're the first one I've told." Scott frowned as a thought came to him.
"Why didn't you get Brains to check it out? Would have been much quicker and you would have had your answer sooner." He glanced at his brother but then put his eyes back on the road.
"Yeah but then Dad would have been wanting to know why I was seeing Brains and what was the problem and all that... and you know I can't keep a secret from Dad for the life of me once he's got his teeth into something." Scott laughed in agreement as they turned onto the road where the hospital was. Keeping a secret from their Father was pretty hard.
"Isn't that the truth. Okay then Johnny boy, let's get this done."
TBTTTBBTBTBTBTB
An hour later found them being ushered into the doctor's office. Dr Walters had a very friendly, competent and easy going manner about him that immediately put Scott at ease. He smiled warmly at them both.
"I see you took my advice John and brought a member of your family with you when you came back to see me." Scott glanced at John who had the grace to look bashful and contrite.
"Yeah well... felt that I should after doing some soul searching recently. So I told Scott, my eldest brother, on the way here today" Scott glared at John and then grinned at the doctor, winking conspiringly at him.
"Plus big brother here decided that little brother there wasn't coming alone once he found out what was going on." John gave a snort of laughter and rolled his eyes at the doctor.
"Not like you gave me a choice when I told you" The doctor laughed and grinned at them.
"Well I'm glad someone's looking out for you John. Now, pop over here and sit up on the bed, take your shirt off and well take the whole thing out and then send what we need and get the biopsy done immediately. They are going to put a rush on the results and they'll be back in four hours. Can you keep him occupied for four hours Scott?"
Scott grinned as he took John's shirt from him as he held it out for him after taking it off his head. The whole thing would be over in a few minutes and then, then he'd have to talk to his younger brother. John was obviously keeping a great many things from him lately.
"I think I can manage that." The doctor smiled as he brought over a tray.
"Great. We'll give you a local John and get this over and done with."
TBTBTBTBTBTBTBTTB
Scott handed back the menu to the waitress with a smile and she left them to it, saying that she'd be back with their drinks in a few minutes. Time to get some answers from his little brother, more than time in fact if he was honest with himself.
"So." John hadn't stopped looking down at his cutlery and didn't even blink as he answered.
"So," The silence stretched out for a moment and then they both laughed as blue eyes met blue. Finally John sighed and looked back down at his hands. "You want to know why I waited until now to tell you huh?"
"Yes, among other things." John just sat there for a long moment and then sighed again, looking back up at his brother.
"Simply put. I love you guys too much." Scott frowned but was silent as the waitress brought their drinks over. When she left he looked at John and frowned slightly, trying to understand the meaning of John's simple words.
"Okay, there's some John logic in there somewhere, but be blowed if I can find it. You didn't tell me because you love us too much? How does that work?" John took a sip of his whiskey, knowing he shouldn't really be drinking after having a local anaesthetic but hey, he was having a rotten day, he was allowed.
"Don't you think I wanted to tell you Scott, don't you think my heart was screaming out to tell you? But I couldn't. Because I knew that if I told you, you'd be constantly worrying about me and your mind wouldn't be on the job and then you'd get hurt or worse and I couldn't live with myself that happened."
Scott thought over his words a moment and knew that John was instinctively right. He shook his head but his tone was supportive. He stared his brother in the eyes as he spoke, putting all the love and faith he had in gone in his words.
"I understand why you did it John; I just wish you didn't have to feel you had to do it that way though." John shrugged as he looked at his older brother.
"We do what we have to do to keep us all safe Scott. This was just my round about way of doing that." Just then their meals arrived and after thanking the waitress they began to eat. Eventually Scott spoke after swallowing a piece of steak, having mulled over John's words.
"Well, the main thing is that you've told someone now, that the lump is gone now and we've just got to wait a few hours."
"Waiting... I hate it." This got a raised eyebrow from Scott, silently asking him elaborate. "I mean, I wait while you guys are on a rescue to make sure you all get home okay. I wait in my tin can all the time for a call to come in. I wait for what ever excuse Alan's going to use to get out of duty early. I wait to come home and I wait to go back to my bird. I wait to talk to you when your down and I wait to talk to you when I need to. I wait all the time. I'm sick of waiting for everything Scott."
This caught Scott by surprise. If anything, John was the most patient of the five brothers. For John to admit that he was unhappy about something was as rare as hen's teeth. Especially since it involved his daily duties and his life. John saw the expression on his face and decided to elaborate a bit more.
"Don't get my wrong Scott. I love my job and I love what we are doing for everyone. I just don't like the fact that sometimes I'm left out all the time and I'm stuck in space waiting for something to happen." John frowned, trying to find the right words for what he was feeling. "It just gets to me sometimes you know? I've been on what, a dozen or so rescues? I feel totally useless when ever you guys are out on rescues. I want to be there with you. But I can't, because no one can do the job the way I do it. And honestly Scott, it really sucks sometimes."
Scott was stunned. This was the most verbose John had been in a long time. He always had been careful with his words, choosing the right ones for the occasion. But this, this was pure straight from the heart. John never, if rarely, spoke this way. But when he did, Scott took notice of every word. Without thinking Scott reached over and took his brothers hand.
"John. I wish I knew what to say. All I can do is be there for you, when ever you need me to be." John squeezed his hand in thanks, but said nothing. He'd said his piece and he was content now. Scott let his brothers hand go and they resumed their meal. Now, all they could do was wait.
TBTBTBBTBTBTB
The wait in Dr Walters's office felt like hours, but in reality was only like five minutes. He walked in and smiled at the two brothers as they sat waiting for him. He'd gone out of the office to get John's test results once they had come back.
"I'll put your mind at ease right away John. I was right; it was a totally benign fatty cyst." The look on John's face was one of incredible relief and like the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders. Scott grinned broadly and clapped his brother on the back.
"See, told you that you didn't have anything to worry about." John blinked back tears of relief that were threatening to overwhelm him. He felt like he had been thrown for a loop and back but now, now there was nothing but pure relief.
"Thank you Dr Walters. That was the best news I've ever gotten." He smiled at John and handed him a small computer disc.
"This is all the results and findings of the entire test for your own personal doctor John, he'll need to know what we've done here for you. I've also included everything he'll need to know just in case for future reference." John took the disc with a smile.
"Thank you, you've been awesome." John stood up and shook his hand, Scott doing the same. He was a good man and Scott was so relieved that he had helped his brother. Scott held out his hand for him to shake.
"I'm glad I've been able to give you some good news, especially this close to Christmas." Dr Walters's words were warm and Scott gave him a grin.
"You and me both. Thank you again Dr Walters."
"My pleasure. Merry Christmas to you both." The two oldest Tracy brothers grinned and chorused back to him.
"Merry Christmas."
TBTBTBTBTBTBTBTBTBTBTB
Tracy Island - Christmas Day
All the presents had been opened and wrapping disposed off. Alan was on via the link with TB5 as they all moved into the dinning room for the traditional huge family lunch that Grandma and Kyrano had prepared.
They had gathered around the table and filled their plates with the delicious looking and smelling food. John was sitting opposite Scott, next to Gordon. Their father was at the head of the table, his Grandmother at the other end. Virgil was at his constant place, by Scott's side.
Jeff looked at all his boys, his face proud. Alan was watching from TB5, his own dinner steaming in front of him. This year, for once, he had volunteered to take duty at Christmas time.
As per usual, their grandmother had sent up Christmas dinner for him a few days before hand frozen so he just had to heat it up and eat with them via video link. Jeff looked around at his boys and smiled, pleased to see them all together.
"Jeff, will you say grace please." Jeff looked at his mother and smiled.
"It would be my pleasure Mother." Jeff closed his eyes and bowed his head, his boys following his example one by one.
"Dear Lord, we thank you for this day and the bounty before us. We thank you for allowing our work to continue and that we are all safe and healthy." At these words Scott looked up and opened his eyes, meeting Johns across the table from him.
Without words they spoke of their love and support for each other as their eyes meet. John suddenly grinned and winked at his older brother and Scott grinned back. He was definitely grateful that his beloved younger brother was fine and healthy.
This Christmas, he truly had something to be thankful for.