No Regard for the Fourth Wall
"Hello, my name is Professor Juniper. I-"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've already went through the rundown when I came to this region." The ten year-old said monotonously.
"Well then are you a boy or a girl."
"What does it bloody look like?"
"I don't know your name. Can you tell it to me?"
"Wait a second lady, you've chosen me to handle high-tech equipment and take care of one of the rarest Pokémon in the region and you don't even know my name?"
"Yes you little shit now tell me your damn name."
"It's Alastriona ya' damn bitch."
"Well then I'm going to introduce you to your two best friends."
"If they're my best friends then shouldn't I not need their introduction from a NPC like you?"
"Shut up it's the plot."
A picture of an Asian boy around my age popped up on the near invisible screen behind Juniper. "This young man is Cheren."
"I have never seen this person in before in my life."
"He can be a bit difficult, but he's a very honest person."
"That's nice to know."
"This is Bianca."
"Don't know her either."
"She's a little flighty, but she works very hard."
"I highly doubt that."
"Because I found potential in you-"
"I've only been here for a week."
Juniper looked pissed. "I am sending on a journey. During your journey you will meet many Pokémon and people with different with different personalities and points of view."
"This feels a lot like foreshadowing."
"I hope you'll what is truly important to you during these adventures. Though I find it highly unlikely."
"Oi!"
"I sincerely hope that throughout these travels you will befriend new people and Pokémon and grow as a person." There was a short silence before we both snorted.
"Keep on wishing lady!"
"Whatever, just get out of my lab."
"Gladly."
Zhe very next Dai
"Alastriona!" The boy from before, Cherry or something ran up the stairs to greet me which I humbly responded to by a loud:
"HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET INTO MY HOUSE!"
"Silly Alastriona, you keep your spare key in the same spot."
"WHAT."
"I heard from Professor Juniper that we can have a Pokémon?"
"If you were told so by a world famous Pokémon professor then why the hell would you ask for my conformation from your friend?"
Neither of us said anything before Cherry looked towards the staircase. "What's keeping Bianca?"
"How the hell should I know?"
As if on cue, Bianca rushed up the stairs.
"How do you people keep on getting into my house?!"
"You left your back window unlocked."
Of course I did.
"So where are the Pokémon?"
"Maybe they're in the brightly colored box that's bigger than my fucking body! But you know just a guess." I replied.
"They were delivered to Alastriona's house so he gets the first pick." I blinked, once, twice then raised my hand.
"Can I go to the bathroom for a sec?"
"I don't know can you." Cherry replied smartly.
"Probably, besides if you wanted to see me with my pants down than you could've just asked." I said lightly so Bianca couldn't hear.
Cherry turned as bright as his namesake. "N-n-n-no! You can go on your own."
I laughed darkly. "Sure thing." I walked out of the room.
Not even twenty seconds later a scream came from that direction it sounded suspiciously like "Damn you Juniper!"
Alastriona walked back into his bedroom.
"Anyways Alastriona you go and choose first."
"Okay." On the box was a note:
Dear Little Shit,
I have brought a Pokémon for you and each of your friends. You should consider yourself lucky I was seriously contemplating giving it to someone else after yesterday's little fiasco. However, your mother begged me to get you out of the house. So enjoy!
-Professor Juniper
After opening the box I found three Pokémon. I decided HELL NO on the pig than looked up what the other two would evolve into on my phone. Picking up the pokéball with a water symbol on it I threw it in a very dramatic way. (Like Ace of Diamonds or Prince of Tennis.)
Out came an ummm… what's it called again? Ah something.
"Aw, I wanted the Oshawatt." Bianca whined.
Osha? Osh, ot, otter! An otter! That's what I was thinking about, an otter!
-Greetings Master.-
Looking around for a few seconds I looked at the Oshawatt.
-You can talk!-
-Yes I can Master but it seems like your friends cannot.-
-Then you can drop the fucking act you know.-
-Oh thank Arceus. - The pokémon sighed.
-So, do you have a name?-
-Nope, lab born and raised. Why do you have any suggestions?-
-What about Anant?-
- Anant?-
-Yeah it means from the stream.-
-Yeah, that sounds good.-
- You say it like you have a choice.-
- I suppose I really don't huh?-
-Absolutely none.-
-Well let this be an exciting ride.-
-I promise you it won't.-
-I'll hold you to that then.-
-Of course.-
"Hay Alastriona, let's battle." Cheren called, he had picked the Snivy.
"Oo, me first." Bianca called shoving herself in front of Cheren.
"Fine, then the winner will have to battle me."
"Sure thing." I said.
"Alright let's go Tepig!"
"Kick its ass Anant."
-Gladly.-
After an extremely sad battle. (Bianca had only used an actual attack once. But I did get 500 poké from it.) Cheren, after healing our pokémon stepped up to battle me.
"Let's see if you can keep up."
"All right give me your best."
The battle took about twenty minutes and half of that was just Anant talking.
"We should apologize to your mom about the mess." I raised an eyebrow at the catastrophe site my room had become.
-How?-
-Setting switch.-
-Ah.-
"Alright then let's go thank Professor Juniper." I heard Cheren decide.
"Wait I have to go home first!"
"Okay I'll be waiting in front of the Pokémon Research Center."
"Thanks. I guess."