My name is Bella, well, Isabella, but I prefer Bella. If you want to know who I am, I am a shell. I am a person in a human body with no human emotion, save for pain. I eat, only when I must. I sleep, but the dreams that come are worse than any scar that could burn. I scream, but nothing can wake me from the nightmare I live. I guess I could be classified as human, but I am no longer the happy girl who was dating a vampire. Yes, I said vampire. Edward... Cullen, a man who's name I can barely think, and cannot say or hear without feeling like I am being ripped within. I sat up in bed. I went back to the couch and sat, staring blankly. Something felt different. No, I just felt something, that alone was different, that was change. I realized my sleep hadn't been plagued by images of him, him kissing my cheek, him whispering that he loved me in brief seconds his lips were on mine, his topaz and liquid gold eyes staring at me with utter conviction as he leaned his teeth over my burning wrist to stop me from becoming a vampire. Then there was him saying that he didn't want me, that I wasn't good enough. After that night there were no emotions to create dreams, only numbness to fill the empty space where my heart had been before he took it.
"Bells, hey, Jake's on the phone." Oh yeah, Jake, my human best friend. He hadn't called in 23 hours, new record. I didn't respond. I hadn't answered a call or spoken since September. Wait, maybe I should,
"Hey Jake." I took the phone form my dad, Charlie.
"Bella? I can hardly believe you answered."
"No idea why I did." I said weakly, my voice hoarse from lack of use.
"Hey, can you come down to the rez today?"
"Why?"
"Nothing much. I just thought we could hang. I got Quil and Embry over."
"Sure. See you there. When?"
"An hour?"
"Deal."
"Great." Surprise and relief edged his voice.
"Yeah. Bye." Charlie stared at her like she'd grown a second head.
"What's wrong?" I asked. Already knowing his answer.
"You just spoke. You didn't scream, you spoke. Words."
"Yes Dad, I spoke, I'm a person. Capable of speech. He, I'm going over to Jake's, that okay?"
"Okay? It's great! I've got to call your mother."
"Don't, I don't want her to hear about his right now."
"Why?"
"I just think she doesn't need to hear it. End of subject."
"Okay Bells."
"Hey, I'm going shopping tomorrow. I'll be out all day."
"Shopping? You hate shopping."
"I used to. But I feel like I could use some fresh clothes. Love ya Dad." With that I hurried to take a shower.
Twenty minutes later I was fixing my hair in the bathroom mirror. I looked in the cupboard. Yes, all the make-up from… Alice… was still there. I used a \thin amount of dark purple on my eyelids with heavy mascara. I thought I looked alright. For clothes I picked out some dark skinny jeans with tears at the knees and a black shirt. My old boots were still under the desk where I had left them last year. Oh yeah, I reminded myself, it's February now. Five months.
"Dad, I'm out."
"Okay honey, drive safely."
"Okay Dad."
"Bella! You're actually here!" Jake ran over, spinning me in a circle.
"I'm here." I sighed, smiled.
"Hey, meet Quil, and Embry." Two teens looked at me.
"Hey guys."
"So you're Bella."
"Yeah."
"Hold on a sec, my phone's ringing." Embry's face changed, becoming a mask of indifference. Quil and Jake looked at each other, then together:
"Sam."
"Who?" I said.
"Sam Uley, he's this, well, I guess you could call him a gang leader." Said Quil sullenly.
"Shut it Jake, you have no idea." Embry said simply, returning to the call.
"And Embry's with them?"
"Yeah." Suddenly the boy in question looked at me, shock registering on his face.
"How?" then: "Got it, okay."
"What'd Sam want now?" asked Quil sarcastically.
"Back off man. Hey, are we gonna check out that new game or not?"
"Let's go." The boys gathered in Jake's living room to play. It was 'Who Would Win?'
"Want in Bellsie?"
"Bring it." They picked teams for the debates, Quil with Jake, Embry with me. With Embry's calculating arguments and my own talent for debate, we won round after round.
"High-five!" Crowed Embry after a particularly vehement match: activity: hunting. Options: Jake's team rooting for John Wayne, mine for the Wolf-man.
"You two, how are you doing it?" Jake asked.
"Honestly, don't you two read? Wolf-man is highly superior to a mortal, albeit renowned John Wayne." Said Embry. I laughed.
"Bella? Wait, are you sure it's really you in there?" Asked Jake.
"Yeah, why?"
"Okay, I haven't heard you answer a call in months, you haven't spoken unless absolutely necessary, and you never, ever, laugh. Today you were actively participating in a recreational activity and thoroughly enjoying it."
"What can I say, I broke through my cocoon and emerged a new person. Hey, I'm even going shopping tomorrow." Jake's eyes bugged out of his head.
"Bella Swan, shopping, by choice, looking forward to it? What has happened to the world?"
"She's probably just happy she left that Edward Cullen guy." Said Quil. I cringed, my arm wrapping protectively around my chest.
"Embry, get her some air while I beat this loudmouth to a pulp. I let Embry take my shoulder to guide me outside. I shuddered. Memories, too many memories.
"Bella, you need to get to your truck. I'll tell Jake I'm driving you home. We'll get you somewhere you can work through things. I promise." I reached the truck, held on to the edge for support. Embry was back a minute later. "Let's go. We drove fore only a few minutes when Embry helped me from the truck. "Okay, your emotions, let them loose. I know you feel like you're being ripped apart. Just let it go." I tried to follow his instructions. In convulsed, writhing as I broke. My human shape was lost as I became a silvery-gray wolf. Someone spoke in my mind.
Bella, this is Sam. You just phased for the first time. Your thoughts say you aren't surprised. –He noted with interest.
I'm surprised I phased, but I knew about the world of supernatural almost since I came here. I'm not easily bothered by weird. –I grimaced.
Look into my thoughts, and learn your past.
Wait, I thought only Quileutes could change.
But your Grandmother Molly married a descendant of the tribe. This ability passed to you, Bella. The presence of Vampires invokes our natural instinct to protect humans.
Has there ever been a female wolf before?
No –Said Sam. You are the first.
Right. –So, what happens now?
Well, if it's the same as it was for me then you come back to Emily's place for a big meal to meet your brothers. –Embry joined in.
Exactly. You two run to Emily's; she can probably find you something to wear.See you two here. Sam's voice vanished.
Welcome to the pack. –Embry said.
Is this what you meant by them having no idea what the gang really was?
Yeah. We're not a gang, we're the protectors. And those two pea brains idea of gang is a group of violent teenage boys causing trouble.
And you fight vampires. –It wasn't a question.
Yes.
I don't understand. The vampires are gone.
The Cullens, yes, but they traditionally aren't the threat. We watch them when they're here, yes. But there's two new ones hanging around. –I froze at Embry's sentence.
Show me in your thoughts. –It was as I feared. Victoria and Laurant were in town. I snarled. The odds of them being here for civil reasons were slim.
You know them?
Oh yea. The redhead is Victoria, and guy with the dreads is Laurant. I met the last spring, along with Victoria's mate, James.
Where's he?
Dead. The Cullens made sure of that when he tried to kill me. –I shifted my paw, the one that had a thin line of missing fur from my scar.
He went after you?
My blood is stronger than that of most humans. Much more appetizing. If not for their special diet I would have been an evening meal the first day I was here. James saw me when I was playing baseball with the Cullens. He and the woman decided to play a game, winner takes all. He gambled and lost, but she was nowhere to be found when James was burning. I guess she decided to resume the game
This is major. Now we know who and what she wants. Bella, you might be the most valuable player yet in these games.
I'm certainly the prize. –We arrived outside a quaint little cottage.
I'll be right back Bells. Embry vanished, then returned in a pair of cut-off jeans.
"Hey Emily, got something for Bella to wear?"
"Come on through Bella. Welcome to the family." I entered the door, and a tall woman led me through to what I assumed was her room.
"These might not be the right size, but we'll see. Bella, focus on your human shape. Try to pull yourself back." I concentrated, drawing my body back on its self. Suddenly I was curled up on the wood floor, completely naked. I accepted the clothes, finding they fit alright.
"Thanks. Emily, I presume?"
"Yeah, Sam's fiancée. And you were the one formerly called the Vampire Girl?"
"Yeah. And you're the Wolf Girl." Again, I wasn't asking.
"I guess I am. Well, now we both are. Welcome."
"Glad to be here if I can keep Victoria from killing me."
"Who?" Sam stood at the doorway, his eyes on Emily before the flicked to her.
"I guess we need to talk, because these two Vamps are bad news." I entered the kitchen to see four teenage boys around a plate of muffins. Somehow seeing them made it final. I was part of the pack. I had changed.