Chapter One

Shock hammered through my body – no, Liss's body – and I was dragged from my lumpy bed to Adrian's comfortable sofa. They were practising awfully late tonight, but trapped just behind the waves of surprise that were dominating Liss's mind was the reason: Adrian had made some progress on his healing ability.

"Wha-what are you doing, Adrian?" Her small voice brought me back to the situation and anger bubbled in my own mind. It didn't take a genius to work out what had just happened.

A half-empty bottle of vodka sat on the kitchenette counter and Liss hadn't had a drop, so that gave some context as to why Adrian was acting like this. It was odd to say that I'd never actually witnessed Adrian when he was completely drunk. By the looks of things, it didn't end well. His arm curved around the back of the sofa, cradling Lissa and urging her towards him.

"What do you think I'm doing?" There was no mention of the word cousin now. "Do you want me to stop?"

"Of course!" Liss replied immediately, but her tone was unconvincing. Breathily, she was looking up at Adrian with widened, sultry eyes. It was thrilling having Adrian this close to me, no, her. She was feeling such strong emotions right now that it was hard to differentiate. His floppy brown hair looked just the same as normal, but he wore that ethereal glow of having been using his magic. It apparently affected other Spirit users, too.

This wasn't the main thing setting Liss's skin on fire, though. This was wrong. This was the naughtiest thing should could imagine – sleeping with someone else. Doing something forbidden. Giving into carnal desires on a sofa. Liss was barely trying to shove those feelings down, but she didn't have the willpower to move from her seat, which was practically on Adrian's lap by now.

I was struggling to remember why she needed to leave as images of her straddling Adrian, of her hand travelling south whilst his lips ravaged her, flowed through her, and my, mind.

"Adrian," Liss's voice should have held a warning as he leaned in close to her, but it was a come hither. She was practically begging him as her back arched of its own accord.

Whilst Adrian wasn't slurring, the flush of his cheeks and the expression he wore made it plainly obvious he was drunk. "Lissa, I really want to kiss you right now."

And this time she found herself not pushing him away. His lips were soft and expert on hers despite his intoxicated state. Liss was flushing an unnatural shade of red and her heart was pounding in her ears. Thoughts of Christian were almost gone from her mind as the excitement consumed her. This was forbidden and for some reason, breaking the rules was turning her on to ridiculous levels.

I was just about to pull out of her head and go and knock some sense into her when the door to the room opened.

Lissa and Adrian's kiss came to an immediate halt, but they didn't spring apart. Liss remained with her thigh pressed against Adrian's and his hand on her cheek. Tears sprung to her eyes as she watched Christian's disgusted face. He was hiding his hurt well. After a good thirty seconds of tension, which Christian's hands balling into fists as he no doubt considered torching the both of them, Lissa slapped Adrian's hand away.

"No need to stop on my account." His voice was completely devoid of emotion and his face didn't even flinch as he watched Liss flounder. Anger smouldered behind his eyes and his posture was tense, but his mouth gave away nothing.

"Christian." She spoke his name like a plea, but it changed nothing. Panic was beginning to rise as she realised there was really nothing she could do. She'd sentenced herself and now she was facing the consequences of getting caught up in the moment.

"What, Liss?" Christian inquired, sarcasm leaking into his tone, now. "What's wrong?"

"Christian, I'm so sorry," she whispered, her voice quiet and quivering. I was impressed she managed to keep looking at the cool façade Christian projected towards her.

Christian gave her one last look before shaking his head. "We're done," he enunciated, slamming the door behind him as he retreated. There had been no waver. Nothing had suggested there might be room for renegotiation. Still, Liss and Christian had always been solid. A team. This had only been a kiss – maybe something could be done to save their relationship. Then again, there was nothing to say how far that kiss would have gone if Christian hadn't interrupted.

It just seemed so odd to think that Christian and Lissa would ever break up.

Forcing myself up and out of my warm bed, I changed out of my pyjamas and into a pair of trackies and a jumper. As much as I wanted to go and confront Liss and let her know just how much of an idiot she'd been, I knew that there was someone else I really ought to find.

Christian and I had never been the best of friends, but when something like this happened, it was nice to have a shoulder to cry on. I knew from experience, because I'd been needing one for a solid month now. Unfortunately no one had been in my head when Dimitri had told me he was leaving to take up Tasha's offer and I hadn't let anyone know. So, I was dealing with it alone and I knew it wasn't fun. Maybe I could be of assistance to Christian.

We'd at least gained some mutual respect for each other since Spokane and I thought he'd appreciate my company, even if he wouldn't admit it.

I dismissed the idea of going to his room pretty quickly: it would be too much effort to sneak past the guardians on duty and I knew he almost certainly wouldn't be there. Instead, I headed towards the chapel and up towards the attic.

I paused outside the door and listened to see if I could hear anything. Christian's breathing seemed even enough and I really hoped he wasn't crying. I wasn't sure I'd be able to deal with that.

Taking a breath and preparing myself, I began slowly opening the door.

"Liss, I swear to God, if you-" Christian began, his voice shaking with anger.

I quickly stuck my head in before he could continue. "It's me, Christian." I really didn't want him to set me on fire prematurely.

"Oh. Go away, Rose." Was his immediate response. It was what I'd expected, honestly, but he should knew I was more stubborn than to just listen to him.

Entering the small room despite his protests, I took a seat opposite him. The light was dim but I could tell he hadn't been crying. Sat with his legs up and his chin rested on them, Christian looked completely empty. I wondered if he'd tried to cry and couldn't.

"I'm sorry," I offered by way of comfort. Now that I was here I realised that I had no idea what I could possibly to say to Christian that might make him feel any better. I'd never been good at cheering people up – I was in Lissa's head and I still sucked. I had no chance with Christian.

Christian rolled his eyes. "It's hardly your fault. Unless you knew about this the whole time and didn't tell me. Then it is partly your fault."

"Oh, no, this was the first time anything like that happened." I tried to assure him. "I was just as surprised as you were when I got pulled into her head."

Christian snorted. "Right." I supposed it was reasonable that he was doubtful. He'd been jealous of the time Liss spent with Adrian from the beginning.

"I mean it, Christian. I don't have any reason to lie to you." I wasn't trying to defend Liss here, but he deserved to know the truth.

Christian still looked like he highly doubted me. "Was she drunk?" He'd obviously noticed the bottle of vodka like I had.

"No."

I heard a barely audible sigh. "Then why?"

I thought back to Liss's mental process when she'd allowed Adrian to kiss her. And I couldn't relate at all. I'd never been in a committed relationship like Christian and Liss at all and then had the opportunity to cheat. I still wasn't entirely sure why she hadn't just gotten up and left. She'd never even considered Adrian as more than a friend – she'd spent so much time trying to match me up with him.

"I don't know," I finally answered Christian.

Christian barked out some sarcastic laughter. "You were in her head, Rose. Of course you know. Is it really that bad?"

"It's hard to explain. It wasn't really anything to do with Adrian, as such, it was the thrill of doing something forbidden. You should talk to her about it, though, not me. It's not really fair for me to tell you what's going on in her mind."

He sighed, but didn't comment. "Thanks for telling me and thanks for your company. I'd rather be alone."

"No, you don't." Being alone was so much worse. Sitting and thinking about it with no distractions didn't help anything.

"I didn't realise you'd developed mind reading abilities." Christian wasn't even looking at me anymore. His head was leant back against the wall as he stared at the ceiling. I was surprised at how calm he was. I was sure something would have been on fire by now. I would have been impressed, but I knew it was only because sadness had detracted from the anger. It wasn't just stellar self-control.

I was about to reply when the door to the attic opened and an extremely pale Liss emerged in the doorway. I'd been thinking about what to say to Christian so much that I'd been blocking Liss out subconsciously. Liss had apparently forgotten that I existed, too, as her face registered shock at my appearance.

It was good that she ignored me, though, and turned her attention immediately to Christian, who'd made himself look, if possible, even more emotionless at her entrance. "Christian, please, just give me a chance to explain," she begged. "I know I've made an awful mistake. I'd do anything to take it back."

Christian's slight lifting of his eyebrow was the only thing that even showed he'd heard her. She took it as a sign to continue.

"I don't even know what happened." Her words were shaky but so far she was kind of telling the truth. She still wasn't quite sure how she'd been so stupid herself. "Adrian was just coming onto me, he was really drunk and we'd used so much magic I think he was really out of it, and I told him that I didn't want to and he ignored me and then-" She got caught up in her tail and didn't even appear to notice the tears that were trailing down her face until her voice was caught in a choked sob. "I just didn't stop him anymore, it was so stupid. I'm so, so sorry, Christian."

"What are you expecting me to say, Liss?" Christian demanded over Liss's incoherent mumbles about how sorry she was. "You expect me to just forgive you and forget it ever happened? You think I'd ever be able to trust you again?"

"I'd stop practising with Adrian," she pleaded. "I'd stop using my magic altogether."

"It's not good enough," Christian dismissed, though he couldn't quite hide how much that statement hurt him. "I don't want to be around you right now. Just go."

Liss was struggling to keep herself upright. She didn't pick up on the fact that Christian had said 'right now' like I did. There was always a chance he'd forgive her. The only thought running through her head right now, though, was that she'd ruined everything. She begged with him once more, but Christian refused to respond. He was blinking rapidly and his knuckles were white from clenching his fists so hard, but he didn't cry.

Liss turned her attention to me now Christian had made his position clear. "I'm going to stay here with Christian for a bit and then I'll come see you," I told her. It wasn't fair of me to ditch Christian for Lissa when she was the one who'd made a mistake.

Her face fell even further and though she knew I was right, she couldn't stop the rush of anger that hit her. It was all becoming a bit too much for her to handle and I had a feeling it was partly due to some of the bad effects of using spirit finally hitting her. "But you don't even like Christian," It was practically a whine. "I really need you right now, Rose."

I scowled as I checked the bond and some of the blackness I found seeped away. "Well maybe you should have thought about that before you did something so stupid."

Despair quickly took over once more and she fled the attack with tears streaming down her face. I'd leave her to stew on it a bit longer – she'd cheated on her boyfriend and I couldn't find the sympathy I should have felt as her best friend. After a few moments of silence, my foul mood dissipated. I realised that Christian was watching me. "What?" I asked him with a frown.

"Why didn't you just go with her? You know how upset she is. I'll be fine."

I shrugged and rested my chin on my knees, much like Christian had been doing when I'd first come to the attic. "I think she deserves to be upset right now." Then the sudden thought that Liss might actually be so upset she'd return to hurting herself crossed my mind and I checked the bond worriedly. Thankfully she hadn't even considered it – maybe the magic wasn't as bad as I'd thought before.

Christian rolled his eyes. "You don't need to baby me. I'm used to being alone."

His eyes were tired and his case couldn't hold mine any longer. Christian wasn't used to being alone anymore – he'd had Lissa. "I'm not pitying you. I'm just, I don't know, really. Just trying to be your friend, I guess," I explained, my voice quieter than I'd anticipated. "I still think you're a dick, obviously." My smirk was probably a poor attempt to lighten the mood. "But I figured we're sort of anti-friends since Spokane."

Christian chuckled, but his heart wasn't in it. Still, it was better than nothing. "I suppose we could call it a truce."

We managed conversation for a surprising amount of time after that. It was trivial talk, of things that meant nothing to either of us, but the point was that it kept his mind off Lissa. Eventually, we were both too tired to keep going.

As we left the attic, my heart was heavy in my chest. I'd finally come to terms with accepting that Christian and Lissa were together and part of my friendship group and now it was all coming to an end.