WHO'S YOUR MOMMY?
Rated PG (each chapter will have it's own rating)
Author's Note: This is the first installment of a series of one shots related to It's the Journey. Some might work as stand-alone pieces, but overall they'll make more sense if you have read It's the Journey. I will never post a story here until the related chapter(s) of It's the Journey have been posted. This one is related to chapters 1-9, with the end relating to chapter 13. If you haven't read it, what you need to know is that Rachel had Finn's baby (although his parentage wasn't clear at his birth) and isn't exactly up for mother of the year. I'd like to thank mykkila09; it was at her suggestion that I wrote this, and I really hope I fulfilled her request and made her happy. Please review.
Santana walked into the loft after her shift at the bar to the sounds of a baby screaming at the top of his lungs. "Rachel, what's up with Stephen?" She called out, heading towards the crib in Rachel's room.
Rachel emerged from Kurt's room, saying, "I have no idea. He's been screaming all day!"
"Well, what have you been doing with him?" Santana asked.
"Nothing. He's a baby. He can't do anything, and you certainly can't do anything with him," Rachel responded.
Reaching in and picking up the tiny boy, Santana placed one hand under his bottom and supported his neck and upper back with the other, bringing him to her chest. "Shh, shh, mijo, I'm here, it's okay," she soothed. "When was the last time you changed him? He's soaked," she said.
"I don't really remember. Not too long ago. I was going to change him again when he ate."
Despite his sopping diaper, the little boy was nuzzling and pawing at Santana's breast. "He's hungry now," she told the child's mother.
"Well, he isn't due to eat again for another hour," Rachel informed her.
"Come on, Stevie, let's get you changed and fed," Santana addressed the baby in her arms.
"His name is Stephen," Rachel said crossly.
Santana ignored her, changing the baby's diaper and heading towards the kitchen.
"He isn't supposed to eat yet," Rachel insisted. "They said at the hospital he'd eat every three hours at this age. He ate just a couple of hours ago."
Santana looked pointedly at the half-full bottle on the counter. "How much did he eat then?"
"I don't know. Half the bottle, I guess. He just stopped eating and turned away from it and started fussing. He started screaming a little while later. But like I said, he's been pretty much screaming all day."
Santana sighed. Sitting down, she laid the baby face down across her lap, patting his back until he burped. "Did you burp him?"
"What?"
"Babies swallow air when they eat, especially when they drink from a bottle. They usually can't get rid of it themselves, so you have to burp them. He probably quit eating because he swallowed too much air, so he felt full. Since you didn't burp him, all that air just stayed in his little tummy and made it hurt, but once the formula was gone he was hungry again." As she explained, she got up, settling the baby against her shoulder and holding him securely with one arm while with the other she began preparing a new bottle. "And, on top of that, while schedules are great, not every schedule is perfect for every baby. You have to adapt."
"And how would you know so much about it?" Rachel asked sarcastically. "It's not like you ever had a baby."
"Um, babysitting."
"You're the youngest," Rachel pointed out.
"And I have two nieces and a nephew, not to mention younger cousins, neighbors; you don't have to have younger siblings to babysit. Didn't you ever babysit?"
"I had a career to focus on and prepare for," Rachel said haughtily.
"Hmm. How's that working out for you?" Santana asked. Okay, maybe it was a little bit snarky, but Rachel deserved it.
"This," Rachel said, looking pointedly at the baby who was now settled in Santana's arms, drinking a bottle, "Is merely a temporary set-back. I'm working on getting back into shape and back on the stage as quickly as possible. That's what I was doing in Kurt's room – looking through audition notices, both for student productions at school and for legitimate Broadway theater. I couldn't focus where he was yelling."
Santana took the bottle away from the baby, who fussed at its loss. "I know, little one, but let's show her how it's done, then we can finish." She burped him again, wiped away a tiny bit of formula that had come up with the burp, and gave him his bottle again. "That's how you prevent a repeat of today," she told the child's mother, who rolled her eyes and stalked into her room.
An hour later Kurt returned from his shift at the diner to find Santana sitting on the floor, her back leaning against the couch. Stephen was sitting in her lap, braced between her arms so he leaned against her stomach. "The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round," she sang softly, as she slowly turned the pages of the board book she was holding.
"What are you doing?" He asked.
"Um, singing. Am I so out of practice that it's unrecognizable as such?"
"But Wheels on the Bus?"
"Well, I was all for a little Nine-Inch-Nails, but little man here vetoed that. I think he just wanted pictures to go with his music."
"Isn't he too young for all this stuff?"
"My mother and both grandmothers sang to all of us from the day we were born. And read to us, too. And apparently, if that's going to happen for this little guy, it's going to be up to you and me. You-know-who is clearly uninterested."
"But two weeks?"
"Never too early. But he's getting sleepy. I'll try to put him to bed in a little while. He and Rachel apparently had a bad day, so I'm going to try to get him to sleep before I take him in to her room. I would have liked to have taken him out, gotten them completely away from each other for a while, but it's too cold and too dark out right now, and while I feel okay by myself in our neighborhood after dark, I can take care of myself. I'd feel a little nervous out with him after dark by myself."
Kurt grabbed another book from the pile on the end table. "My turn. He just might be my nephew, after all."
As he reached out for the baby, Santana snuggled him closer for a moment before sighing, kissing the top of Stephen's tiny head, and passing him almost reluctantly to Kurt. If he didn't know better, he'd swear that she was his mother, and that she was unwilling to let someone else hold him.
"God, I cannot stand being cooped up in here with him any longer!" Rachel raged, sending a glare toward Stephen, asleep in his crib.
"What did he do now?" Santana asked, waltzing into Rachel's room, cup of coffee in hand.
"He was up three times last night!"
"I'm aware. Remember, I'm the one who fed and changed him and got him back to sleep," Santana pointed out.
"But he woke me up every time. How am I supposed to catch up with classes and prepare for auditions if I can't even get a full night's sleep?"
"I don't know. I'm dancing, waitressing, covering for my stoner manager, and auditing classes so I'm ready to actually take classes next semester, and I manage, despite being the one who stays up with him."
"But you don't have to be perfect at any of that. I have to be perfect, and I go back to school next week; I have to prove to everyone that he hasn't made me lose my edge. No one can think a baby's made me soft," Rachel insisted.
"Then you might want to try a few crunches," Santana said, a bit cruelly. She was sick and tired of Rachel griping about Stephen constantly. He'd done nothing to bring this on himself, and his mother seemed to blame him for everything wrong in her life. She was also more than a little fed up with taking care of a baby who wasn't her own, even as much as she loved him, particularly when the child's mother seemed to regard that as Santana's job, to be done without complaint, payment, or appreciation of any sort.
Rachel glanced down at her stomach, remarkably flat for having given birth only three weeks earlier, but still not as firm as it had been before her pregnancy. Deciding to change tactics, she said, "Have you talked to Blaine recently? He just vanished after I had Stephen. We should call him. Do you have to work today? We could meet him for lunch or something."
"He probably doesn't want to babysit," Santana commented. "And yes, I have to work, but not until late afternoon."
"Great. I'll call him," Rachel said.
After a short conversation, she hung up and turned to Santana. "Okay, he has a class or study group or something at lunch time, but he said he could meet for coffee in an hour."
Santana stared at her cup. "Oh, well, I guess more caffeine won't hurt. Maybe it'll be better coffee than this stuff."
"If you want nice coffee you buy it. Do you know how much formula costs?"
"You know there's an alternative that's a lot cheaper."
"I will not have him doing one more thing to ruin my body. It would destroy my breasts."
"No one's looking at your breasts, Berry."
"I'm certain no one will be if it looks like I've been breastfeeding."
"Whatever."
Thirty minutes later Santana had woken Stephen, dressed him warmly in layers, and checked to make sure everything they needed was in his diaper bag, and they left. "Berry, you can carry the baby or the diaper bag and stroller. There are two of us, there's no need for me to juggle all of this and Stephen too," she complained.
Rachel reluctantly reached out and took the folded umbrella stroller from her as they approached the top of the first set of stairs down to the street. Ignoring Santana's glare at being left with both the baby and the diaper bag, she jogged down the stairs and was waiting impatiently at the bottom when Santana, slowed down by an infant and his supplies, arrived.
"I'm glad there wasn't a fire. My baby would have died if he'd been depending on you to get him out in that case."
"I would hope that if there was a fire you'd be a little more concerned with getting him out yourself," Santana snarled back.
Once on the street, they opened the stroller and buckled Stephen in. Rachel left Santana to carry the diaper bag and push the stroller, while she walked alongside. Santana supposed she should consider herself lucky that Rachel at least picked up the front of the stroller to help carry it down the stairs at the subway station, and back up again when they reached their stop.
They arrived at the coffee shop and greeted Blaine warmly. He entered the line and ordered their coffee while they got a table.
Stephen had dozed off again, and Santana positioned the stroller to face her. She gently opened his jacket to keep him from getting too warm in the cozy shop, doing her best to not wake him. An elderly woman passed by and patted her on the shoulder, saying, "So sweet. And he looks just like his mommy. You can just tell he's going to look like you when he grows up."
"He's mine, actually," Rachel informed her in a frosty tone, although she still made no move to touch the tiny child.
"Oh," the woman exclaimed, startled. Santana shot her an apologetic glance.
Blaine soon joined them, coffee in hand, and they began discussing their lives. Blaine had already noted that Santana was pushing the stroller when they arrived, but hadn't thought too much about it. Now he noticed that it faced Santana, and that Rachel barely seemed aware of the baby's presence, although Santana kept a close eye on him as he slept. Most of Rachel's news revolved around what she was doing to get back on track, both with school and her career. She mentioned DNA testing to prove to Finn that he was Stephen's father, and other than that the news concerning her less than one month old child revolved around the litany of sitters who were caring for him, or were lined up to do so, while his mother focused on becoming a star. When Stephen awoke and began to fuss, Rachel made an annoyed face, while Santana reached down and picked him up. She snuggled him close and he calmed down slightly as she reached into the diaper bag for his bottle. Shifting him into the crook of one arm, she began to feed him. Although she continued to participate in the conversation, the majority of her attention was clearly focused on the baby. She cooed at him and glanced only briefly at Blaine and Rachel, mostly maintaining eye contact with Stephen, who stared at her face intently. If Blaine hadn't known better, he would have sworn the baby was Santana's.
A couple of weeks later, Rachel and Santana came to see him play, along with Kurt and Adam. During their eleven o'clock set break, the girls excused themselves, as the babysitter had a curfew, and they had to get home to relieve her. Santana seemed fine with leaving, but Rachel seemed put out; Blaine briefly wondered if she was going to try to get Santana to go home to the baby without her, but when Rachel began whining about leaving a glare from Santana shut her up. Blaine had a feeling it wouldn't last long, and was glad he could get back on stage and away from them before the argument that was brewing erupted.
They were waiting for the subway when Rachel turned to Santana and said, "Really? You couldn't help me out just once? You could have gone home and paid Jackie and stayed with him, and I could have had a nice evening out. But no! You couldn't even do this one little thing for me. Since I had Stephen I haven't gotten to have any fun at all." She set her mouth in a pout.
"Seriously? You've got to be kidding. I babysit him constantly. Even when you're around I'm the one who takes care of him!"
"I have other things to deal with!"
"You have a baby! You have to deal with him. He has to come first now, whether you like it or not!"
"Plenty of women have successful careers after having children," Rachel stated.
"But that doesn't mean that they ignore the existence of the children," Santana argued. Rachel didn't respond, opting instead to give Santana the silent treatment.
A few weeks later, Stephen's paternity confirmed, his parents married in a small ceremony in Lima. A reception was held at Rachel's fathers' home. Everyone wanted to see Stephen, and he was passed from person to person, everyone adoring him. Only his mother seemed uninterested, and made every effort to refocus attention on herself. Finn loved showing him off, but when he grew tired and fussy Finn was at a loss as to what to do. Rachel made no move to help him, but Santana stepped in, taking the child and soothing him. She disappeared, finding a quiet guest room in which she could change and feed him, before putting him to sleep. There was no crib or travel crib there, and she wasn't sure where Rachel had put them, so she stayed with the baby to make certain he was okay napping on the bed. Rachel had clearly been getting annoyed by the attention showered on her child, and Santana was ready to slap her. The last thing she needed was to be another planet orbiting Rachel Berry anyway, and she didn't want to deal with Rachel any more today.
Santana awoke to the sounds of three month old Stephen shrieking in pain. She stumbled toward the bedroom that Finn and Rachel now shared with the child, nearly running into Kurt who was emerging from his room as well. "Will someone please make him shut up?!" Rachel yelled. Finn nearly ran into both of them as he walked out of the room carrying the baby.
"What's wrong with him?" Kurt asked groggily.
"I don't know," Finn answered. "He was fussy all day, and you and Santana were either working or at school, and I was supposed to be at school but the babysitter called and made me come home. Rachel was working on some project at NYADA and couldn't come-"
"Wouldn't come," Kurt clarified. "Her classes today were all in the morning. Her afternoon ones were cancelled because of some meeting all the professors had about recruitment and admissions and auditions or something like that. She's trying to get cast in another student production, but after she bailed on the first one she agreed to do, no one wants to work with her. I get why she bailed, but I told her not to agree to it in the first place. Once she said she'd do it, she should have followed through."
Santana was quiet. She knew she should let Finn handle this himself, but she couldn't. She watched Stephen for a few minutes, as Finn tried to comfort him.
"Maybe if I put him in the stroller and took him for a walk?" Finn mused.
"I don't think so," Santana sighed, reaching to take the boy. "It's the middle of the night in the middle of winter. Look how he's pulling and rubbing his ears. And he's hot, I think he has a fever."
"I could call my mom . . ." Finn mused.
"Let's give him baby Tylenol now, and take him to the doctor in the morning," Santana suggested.
"Um, okay," Finn said uncertainly.
Santana got the medicine and managed to get Stephen to take it. She was the only person who could get him to take medicine. After almost an hour the medicine seemed to take effect. It only made him a little cooler, but he calmed down somewhat, as long as someone was holding him and walking. Santana took turns with Finn and Kurt while Rachel slept.
In the morning Santana accompanied Finn and Stephen to the doctor, not trusting Finn to describe the boy's symptoms accurately. They left with a diagnosis of an ear infection, prescription in hand. Santana called in sick to work on the way home. When they arrived, they found Kurt returning from his early classes and Rachel gone. Although they started his medication, it took time for it to work. All of that day and the next Stephen spent most of the day and night crying, before the antibiotic finally seemed to kick in and make him feel better. Rachel made herself as scarce as possible, while Santana took care of the sick infant. Finn and Kurt helped out a little so that Santana could nap, but both felt helpless and incompetent, so they mostly let Santana take charge and care for him. By the time he was better Santana was exhausted, but had to return to work and school.
She was in the dressing room of the club where she worked as a dancer, trying to cover the evidence of more than two days with almost no sleep, when one of the older dancers saw her and laughed. "Honey, you're too tired to even put on makeup, and I would have sworn you could do that in your sleep. Let me help you." As she applied concealer under Santana's eyes, she said, "If I didn't know better I'd swear you were that little boy's mama."
"Blaine and I have decided to move in together," Kurt announced. It was early March, a little over a week before spring break. Santana's heart sank at the news; there went her backup with Stephen.
"But, who's going to watch Stephen if I'm in class or working and so are Finn and Santana?" Rachel protested.
"I guess you're going to have to arrange for a babysitter," Kurt informed her. "Which might be a good idea if you and Finn are both busy anyway."
"What does that mean?"
"It means," he said, in an only slightly condescending tone, "that you should have been doing that all along, not assuming Santana or I will always be available to take care of Stephen. We both love him, but really, he is your baby."
"I would think that you would show some responsibility, not just run out on your obligations," Rachel said haughtily.
Kurt took a deep breath and blew it out his nose. Santana recognized the signs; he was trying to calm himself down and not scream at Rachel. "I would think you'd at least attempt to do the same," he said, "especially since Stephen isn't my obligation, and he isn't Santana's. In case it escaped your notice, I didn't father a child, Finn did, and Santana didn't give birth, you did, so although we both love Stephen, he isn't our responsibility, he's yours."
Rachel spun on her heel and stormed into her room. Santana was certain if she'd had an actual door she would have slammed it.
Finn looked confused. "I'm not sure how we're going to manage," he said. "I'm not like you or Blaine; I was never good in school. I was good at sports and okay with the music, but the rest of it. . . ." He trailed off.
"Your point?" Kurt asked him.
"It's just, Rachel is working some, going to school full time, and working on getting into a show, all while being an understudy or stand-in or whatever she is for Funny Girl, and Santana is always working and now she's in school too, and I'm in school full time, and I think I'm going to get a job offer from one of the places I applied, but I have to do study groups too. I'm not like the rest of you. I need help with my classes and studying, and between that and how much Santana and Rachel are gone, we really need you here with Stephen."
"Finn, you and Rachel are going to have to figure out something. I'm sorry, but this situation isn't my fault, and it's not Santana's. Yes, you and Rachel go to school full time, and Rachel has a couple of part time jobs, but Santana works two jobs, and her management at both of them seem a little foggy on the concept of part time, and I work three, two with similar issues, and Isabelle just forgets that anyone has a life outside of , and we both go to school full time as well."
Santana was grateful for the support, but still dreaded losing the only other adult who was both competent and willing to care for the baby. Despite Kurt's speeches, she really didn't think the situation was likely to change.
Kurt and Blaine found an apartment together, and as predicted, a greater share of the responsibility for Stephen fell on Santana. She began caring for him more and more as Kurt spent more time packing. The only relief came from the daycare at the community center where Finn had gotten a job, but its hours were limited, and Santana frequently received panicked phone calls from Finn or Rachel begging her to pick Stephen up when the daycare closed.
"Here he is, Mrs. Hudson," the young woman approaching the daycare desk said as she brought Stephen to Santana, along with his diaper bag.
"Oh, I'm not Mrs. Hudson," she told her.
"I'm sorry, I just assumed you and this little guy's dad were married; I guess I shouldn't jump to conclusions."
"He's not mine, but I am authorized to pick him up," Santana told her. "They checked my ID before they called for him. You can check it again if you want."
"Oh, I just assumed you were his mother," the woman said. "I guess I've never seen her, and I've seen you a few times, and he's so comfortable with you."
"I live with his parents and uncle, so we're buddies, aren't we, mijo?"
Stephen smiled up at Santana and gurgled at her, grabbing for her hair. Shifting him to her hip and shouldering his bag, she smiled at the woman and said, "Thanks for staying a few minutes late with him. They didn't call me until right before close, and it took a few minutes to convince my boss I had to leave."
"No problem," the woman told her.
"I'm taking my armchair," Kurt announced when she walked through the door with Stephen. He reached out to take the baby from her arms, freeing her to begin fixing his dinner in the kitchen.
"I figured," she said, choosing a selection of partially eaten jars of baby food from the refrigerator.
"I think that's about all I'm taking, as far as furniture," he told her.
"Don't you need someplace to sleep?" She asked.
"Blaine, um, didn't want to use my bed, so I'm leaving it."
"Why didn't he – oh!" Santana started to ask, then realized why Blaine wouldn't want Kurt's bed. "Can I have it then?"
"Sure. We bought new linens too, so you can have all my sheets and blankets as well."
"Privacy at last. After all this time Auntie Tana won't know what to do with that, will she, Stephen?" She said as she took the baby from Kurt's arms and secured him in his high chair. As much as she'd miss both Kurt's company and his help, at least something good was coming from him moving out.
The day of Kurt's move, Santana worked an early shift at the club where she danced, and then went directly to the club where she was a waitress. It was nearly three a.m. when she trudged up the final set of steps to the loft, looking forward to collapsing in a real bed for the first time in over a year and a half. Walking into the room that had been Kurt's, she was stunned to find his bed dismantled and pushed against a wall, having been replaced by Stephen's crib.
She walked into the next room, where she quietly pulled the covers off Finn and Rachel, kicking the mattress for good measure.
"What?" Rachel asked blearily.
"What the Hell?" Santana hissed.
"What are you talking about?" Rachel asked.
"Once Kurt left I was going to take his room. It just makes sense."
Finn looked confused and a little scared. "But Rachel said – she told me to –"
"You couldn't expect me to continue to keep him in here," Rachel said. "I need privacy. I need to be able to sleep, to rest properly. That wasn't going to happen as long as he was in here."
"Why put him in Kurt's room?" Santana demanded. "Put him in the living room. No one in diapers can claim privacy."
"It's too busy there. And I need to be able to use that space any time I want without fear of waking him up, because you know what a disaster that is. It's just better for everyone if he's in the other bedroom."
"Everyone except me," Santana grumbled.
Rachel huffed. "You are so selfish sometimes."
Santana sent her a death glare before stomping out, biting her tongue to keep from yelling a retort she might (but probably wouldn't) regret later.
After a few days of caring for Stephen with no help from his mother, and only limited help from his father, Santana was fed up. Finn often forgot to take Stephen to day care, or just didn't take him, assuming Santana would be available, and Rachel was completely disengaged, not seeming to know or care where her son was most of the time, as long as he wasn't bothering her. More than once Santana was forced to drop him off at day care, and arguments between she and Rachel became more and more frequent as she tried to keep up her work schedule and convince Rachel to take responsibility for her child. She couldn't keep this up, and she knew it.
The final straw came the day she snapped at Stephen. She'd had to call another dancer to cover the end of her shift, because Rachel was God-only-knew where and Finn was making a presentation to a group at the community center about the value of music education, leaving Santana to race to pick Stephen up at day care again. When she picked him up, the girl working the desk cheerfully informed her that Stephen had skipped his nap. She rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath about letting the inmates run the asylum before picking up all of Stephen's gear and the baby and stalking out. The missed nap made him fussy, and once they got home he kept whining while she tried to make his dinner, then shoved his bowl off his highchair, before beginning protest its loss. "If you'd taken a nap, like you were supposed to, you'd be in a lot better mood, and you wouldn't be fussing now!" Santana said sharply, raising her voice. Stephen's eyes grew huge at her tone, and his bottom lip began to quiver, and he started to sob. Realizing what she'd done, she began to gather him into her arms, soothing, "Oh, no, mijo, it's not your fault. I'm so sorry. Auntie Tana shouldn't have said that, I'm just frustrated. Those silly girls at day care are supposed to make sure you take your nap. It's not your fault, I'm not mad at you, I promise." After a few minutes she was able to calm him down enough to make him something else to eat and feed it to him, but she finally acknowledged the stress was getting to her. It was time for a change.
She paid a visit to Kurt and Blaine, and in the process basically invited herself to live with them. Even if they hadn't had a spare bedroom, a couch in an apartment without a baby would be an improvement, but they did have one, even if it was tiny. The two men looked at each other, then excused themselves to go to their bedroom to discuss the matter. She was on pins and needles until they returned, announcing that she could stay with them until she was able to find another place, and laughing when she told them she'd already arranged to have Kurt's old bed delivered. Finally, she would have peace, quiet, and freedom.
Santana's expected peace and quiet didn't turn out quite as expected. Rachel still expected her to look after Stephen regularly; Finn, however, finally realized just how much she'd done. She still heard from both of them, asking her to help, but while Rachel made unreasonable, and hence, easily deniable, demands, Finn's requests were much more reasonable, and he was quick to acknowledge his own responsibility and the fact that she was doing him a favor. As a result, most of her days off found her taking the subway to Brooklyn to babysit.
Although she complained almost constantly about it, Kurt noticed that her face softened whenever she talked about his nephew, and, like him, she was at the loft at least once a week. Occasionally they went together, and Kurt noticed that Stephen's face always lit up when he saw her. He had to tamp down pangs of jealousy when they both walked in to the loft and Stephen reached for Santana first, only managing to console himself with the fact that, with a young child's lack of attention span, the baby was soon reaching for him and struggling to be free of her arms. It was clear that the little boy adored both of them, and equally transparent that they both missed him.
In early November, Santana and Kurt, accompanied by Brittany and Blaine, made their way to Bushwick, presents in tow, to celebrate Stephen's first birthday. Leaning against the table while Finn struggled to get the cake out of the bakery box intact, she watched Kurt and Blaine, sitting on the couch with Stephen between them. Blaine had found a sports highlight show featuring the Ohio State Buckeyes football program, and was trying to explain football to the infant, while Kurt leafed through an issue of Vogue and pointed out various pictures as though he were narrating the most fascinating story ever told. Stephen's eyes, huge and fascinated, constantly moved from Blaine's face to the television to Kurt's face, then to the magazine and back to Blaine, occasionally glancing down to the floor where Brittany was playing with his new toys.
"Does he talk yet?" She asked.
"What?" Rachel responded.
"Has he said any words?" Santana clarified.
Rachel rolled her eyes. "He's a baby. Babies don't talk."
Finn cast a worried glance toward his son. "The doctor asked the same thing. She said it's not unusual for them to talk later than this, but that he should start saying at least a few words soon."
"Do you talk to him?"
Rachel huffed. "Again, he's a baby. He wouldn't understand anything we said to him anyway."
Finn looked guilty. "I try, but I'm just so busy I forget sometimes."
Santana rolled her eyes. "The more you talk to him, the faster he'll talk. By the time I turned one, they couldn't shut me up."
"Well, apparently not much has changed since then," Rachel replied cattily. Kurt and Blaine stifled their laughter; they had to live with Santana, after all.
As Finn and Rachel left the apartment on Thanksgiving, Rachel turned to Santana. "Why don't we ever just hang out anymore? Today was fun. Can't we meet for coffee like we used to, or just go do something?"
Santana eyed her suspiciously. "We never hang out because we were never close, and now that we don't live together it doesn't happen by chance. The only time you ever call me is to demand that I keep Stephen so you can get away from him."
Rachel plastered on a syrupy sweet smile that Santana instantly recognized as fake. "Why would I ever want to be away from this little angel? I'm only away from him because I have to be, you know, to be successful so that I can provide everything he needs."
Finn looked decidedly uncomfortable as Rachel blithely disregarded his contribution to their child's financial support.
"Okay, fine. There's a coffee shop two blocks down, just a block this way from the subway station closest to the apartment. Meet me there, Saturday, eleven o'clock. We can have coffee, and you can be back home in time for Stephen's nap."
"I'll see you then," Rachel said brightly, turning to leave.
"What was that about?" Kurt asked.
"I don't know, but I feel like I'm going to be finding out in a couple of days."
Santana was already at the coffee shop when Rachel approached, pushing Stephen in his stroller. They ordered coffee and sat down.
"You know, Santana, I've been thinking. You and the doctor both asked about Stephen talking, and Kurt and Blaine kept trying to get him to talk at Thanksgiving, and Finn said some of the other kids his age at the daycare are saying a few words. Maybe, if you were just around him more, he might start talking. I mean, you seem to talk to him as much as you do to me."
"It's easier to be civil when speaking to him," Santana commented.
Rachel ignored her, continuing with her thought. "You could move back in, and things would be so much more convenient. We wouldn't have to worry about Stephen going to daycare, babysitters –"
"Convenient for you, maybe," Santana cut her off. "For me, not so much. I both work and go to school in Manhattan. The apartment I share with the boys is much more convenient for everything I have to do, just not as convenient for doing you favors. Not to mention, I happen to be living with Brittany as well now, and we're a package deal."
Rachel looked a bit nonplussed as Santana added the last part. She clearly hadn't considered the implications of Santana's relationship with Brittany. "Well – " she started, just as Stephen began to fuss, protesting his imprisonment in his stroller.
While Rachel ignored him, he seemed to expect her response, instead holding his hands out to Santana, who immediately obliged him by unfastening the straps that held him into the offending device and lifting him to her lap. Once in Santana's lap, he began to play with the buttons on her blouse with one hand, and her hair with the other, as she fished in her purse for a small plastic container of goldfish crackers for him, having long since learned that Rachel would forget to stock the diaper bag with snacks. Once he saw the crackers, his eyes lit up, and he turned in her lap and gleefully began the task of picking up the small objects and stuffing them into his mouth.
"Are those yummy goldfish, Sweetie?" Santana asked.
With wide eyes, he turned back to her, and, smiling a crumby smile, reached up to pat her cheek. Looking into Santana's eyes, he opened his mouth and said, through the last remnants of soggy goldfish crumbs, "Mama." Once the word was out, it seemed to shock everyone at the table, even Stephen.
"Oh, Baby, did you finally decide to talk to us?" Santana asked him, trying to show her approval at his efforts at speech while simultaneously defusing the situation by including Rachel, who seemed, possibly for the first time in her life, at a loss for words.
Delighted with his accomplishment, and with Santana's clear approval, Stephen bounced in her lap, continuing to stare at her face, as he repeated, "Mama, Mama, Mama!"
Regaining her powers of speech, Rachel announced. "Stephen, I am you mother!"
At her tone, he turned to look at her, face clouding a little, before deciding to focus instead on what was making him happy. Turning back to Santana, he reached up to pat both her cheeks, one with each hand, while chanting, "Mama, Mama, Mama!"
Suddenly Rachel reached out and snatched the child off Santana's lap, causing him to let out a furious howl as he reached back toward Santana, attempting to return to her arms. Placing him roughly in the stroller, she buckled him in, saying, "I think it's pretty clear it's time for us to go. He's apparently so tired he doesn't even know who's who." Without further conversation, she pushed the stroller from the shop.
Rachel fumed all the way home, and was still furious when Finn returned from the community center, where he met with several choir groups he had organized, two of which practiced on Saturday.
"Well, you can stop worrying about Stephen talking," she announced.
"Oh?" He asked. Stephen starting to talk could only be a good thing, yet she was clearly angry, which confused him.
"Yes. He decided to start talking today, of all days, at coffee with Santana."
"But isn't that a good thing?"
"He called her 'Mama', Finn! Her, not me!"
"Maybe he meant you . . . ." Finn tried to appease her.
"Sure he did. Watch." She said, walking over to where her son was playing in a corner of the living room. "Who am I, Stephen?"
The little boy looked at her blankly before turning back to his toy.
"She did this on purpose! You can't tell me she didn't!"
"All I ever hear her call herself around him is 'Auntie Tana,'" Finn told her.
"But she's around him a lot without us. I just know she told him to call her 'Mama," Rachel insisted.
"I don't think she'd do that," Finn tried to defend Santana.
"Whose side are you on?"
"I'm not on anyone's side! I'm just trying to be calm and logical," Finn told her.
"I'm your wife! You're supposed to be on my side, always! Or has she turned you against me, too?" Rachel ranted.
"Santana hasn't turned anyone against anyone!" Finn was getting fed up.
"The Hell she hasn't!"
"Rachel, language! Do you want Stephen repeating something like that?" He admonished.
"Don't worry. He won't say it unless she tells him to!" She spat.
Picking up his son, Finn said, "Rachel, we're taking a walk. You need to calm down before we get back."
Rachel didn't respond as Finn grabbed a couple of snacks for Stephen and a bottle, threw them in the diaper bag, and tossed it over his shoulder as he grabbed the stroller.
Once on the street, he called Santana. The call when to voice mail. He tried Kurt next. "Hey Finn, what's up?"
"Well apparently Stephen called Santana 'Mama' and Rachel's blowing a gasket."
"Yeah. Santana told me. She turned her phone off after Rachel called her three times, once to tell her she could never see Stephen again, and twice just to cuss her out." Well, that explained why he couldn't reach Santana.
"Have you ever heard her try to get Stephen to call her 'Mama?' Rachel is insisting she told him to do it."
"Nope, only 'Auntie Tana,' although I've heard her talk to him about Mama and Daddy, but she was talking about Rachel and you."
"Okay. I didn't really think she'd do anything like that, but I just wanted to make sure. Um, you might tell her to block Rachel's number for a while. Oh, and tell her I'm not mad."
"Will do. Anything else?"
"No," Finn sighed. "But if you come see Stephen over the next few weeks, you might want to come alone, or just with Blaine; as far as I'm concerned Stephen can still see Santana, but we better make sure Rachel's not around at the same time for a while."
"Got it. Well, try and talk her down. I wish you luck."
If Stephen noticed his mother's slightly colder demeanor, he gave no sign, seeming to simply accept that that was the way Rachel was. He seemed more surprised, however, when she played the doting mother, an act she reserved for times when they were in public together, one which seemed based on his interactions with his Auntie Tana.
He continued to see his Auntie Tana regularly, with her babysitting about once a week. The difference was that Santana and Finn carefully arranged things so that Finn was the one to come home and relieve her. Rachel never thought to look into the identity of the sitters Finn lined up, and therefore simply assumed that Finn was continuing to block Santana from Stephen's life.
Eventually, her attitude toward Santana thawed, and she began to call her when babysitting "emergencies" arose, usually the result of her failure to seek a sitter until the moment she actual needed one. However, she was always clear to emphasize to Stephen that she was "Mommy" and Santana was "Auntie Tana," as if the child needed to be reminded. Santana simply rolled her eyes and tried to hide her exasperation from Rachel, glad that she was being allowed to continue to have a relationship with the child she had come to love.
Once Finn and Rachel divorced, Santana and Brittany, along with Kurt and Blaine, became mainstays in Finn's children's lives, up until Finn took his little family and returned to Ohio. Although she missed the children terribly, Santana was always willing to admit that Finn was better off, and more comfortable, in Ohio, where he had the support of family. However, she promised Stephen, and herself, that she would always be there for him if he needed her.
Santana walked through the crowd of guests at Finn and Quinn's wedding reception, hugging old friends and catching up on things. Suddenly, she felt arms wrap around her from behind. Looking down, she saw two small hands clasped together around her waist, just as she heard, "Mommy, I couldn't wait to see you again!"
Turning quickly, she knelt down so she was at eye level with Stephen, saying quietly, "Oh, no, Baby, I'm not your mommy, Quinn is –"
"It's okay," She heard Quinn say warmly. "I'm just so glad someone was there for him, to be his mother, when he was little and needed someone so much. Obviously Rachel never was, and I wasn't there then either. He calls me Mommy too, and I'm okay with that." Quinn laughed. "We've both played the role for him, so if he wants to call us both Mommy, that's fine."
"Thank you," Santana whispered gratefully, hugging Quinn with tears in her eyes. "He's always-"
"I know," Quinn told her. "He used to talk about his Mommy, and at first I thought he meant Rachel, but eventually I figured out he meant you. We've talked about it. I think he feels like if he calls you something else it might mean losing you, or making you less a part of his life, but I told him he never has to let you go. He needs you as much as he does me." Turning to Stephen, she said, "Stephen, Honey, I have to go talk to some other guests, but why don't you catch up with Mommy Tana. You can tell her all about school, okay?"
As Quinn walked away, Stephen wrinkled his nose. "There's too much homework and I hate word problems and my teacher expects us to write three whole paragraphs, and each one has to have five sentences, and that's like a million sentences, which is way too much and . . . "
Santana and Quinn shared a smile over his head as he continued to complain about the injustices of second grade. It continued that way for years, well into Stephen's adulthood. Quinn was there day to day, but when he was truly frustrated or hurting, or just needed to talk, he turned to Santana: when his first crush didn't like him back, when he had his first kiss, when his first girlfriend dumped him, when another cheated on him, when he was grounded for something completely (according to his teenaged logic) unreasonable, when his grandfather passed away. She spend hours on the phone, and in person when she could, comforting him, soothing him, agreeing that he had the most unreasonable parents (while texting said parents to tell them if he were hers he'd be grounded for much longer), and just being his sounding board. She helped him choose the ring he used to propose, and sat in the front pew, with Finn and Quinn, at his wedding. She was the first person other than his wife to know he was going to be a father, the first to know the baby was a boy, and the first to get a call, shouted over the screams of a baby with incredible lungs, telling her she was, in his mind, at least, a grandmother. It was a bond only broken many years later, when Santana passed away at the age of ninety-one. Even after that, he sometimes found himself standing at her grave, because something important had happened, something she needed to know.
End Note: Please, please review. I really want to know what everyone thinks of this! I do try to respond to reviews. Also, if there are any other stories you'd like to see here, please let me know.