Jeff woke up that morning to his usual groggy and not a morning person roommate Nick snoring away. He laughed as he threw a pillow at Nick.
"Wake up" he said walking into the bathroom. Nick snapped awake glaring at Jeff. Jeff just stuck his tongue out at him and got in the shower. When he was all clean he walk back in to see Nick holding Jeff's phone.
"Lover boy texted you" Jeff grabbed his phone from Nick and smiled.
"Aww look Jeffy's in love" Jeff glared at him and blushed.
"Go take a shower you stink duval" Nick just shook his head and got in the shower.
Jeff read the text and texted Thad back. He got dressed as he talked to himself, "today is the day. I'm just going to tell him. Just pull him aside and say 'Thad I like and I don't just mean as a friend' then I guess I'll see what he says" Jeff let out a heavy sigh as he tied his tie.
"He's gonna say he likes you too" stated Nick standing in the door way. Jeff jumped.
"God don't do that…and how do you know?"
Nick just rolled his eyes "cuz I just do ok?"
"Yeah whatever" laughed Jeff "see you at lunch" Jeff ran out of the room towards the bench on the way to his first class. This was where he met Thad before class every day.
The warning bell had rung and still there was no Thad. Andrew came running by.
"Come on we'll be late" he said grabbing onto Jeff and dragging him to class. When they got inside there was no Thad insight either. All day it was the same thing, every time Jeff was supposed to see Thad he was nowhere to be found. Jeff couldn't eat that day because he was concerned for him. Nick looked at him and sighed,
"Find Thad yet?" Jeff just shook his head no. Nick reached out and put his hand on top of Jeff's. "It'll be ok, I'm sure he's fine."
Jeff just shook his head. "Yeah ok"
For the rest of the day Jeff wasn't smiling and wouldn't look at anyone. He didn't want to go to warbler practice that day, but he did anyhow. As he walked in he saw that Blaine, Wes and David all had bruises on their faces. Jeff had asked what from and they all look at each other then gave him some excuse about walking into something on the grounds. Jeff just said oh ok. He found his seat, he kept waiting to see Thad at the table but he never showed up. Jeff decided to text him again for the 8th time that day, but once again it never went through. He couldn't concentrate during practice so he excused himself and went back to his room.
Once he was there he dropped onto his bed and laid there. Did I do something wrong? Was I too pushy? Maybe I scared him? Jeff could feel the tears well up. He had to know why Thad wasn't answering him. He decided to check the one last place he hadn't yet. He went and knocks on Thad's dorm room. Trent opened the door smiling then dropped his smile.
"Jeff, Thad's gone. He left this morning" stated Trent "actually he punched Wes, David and Blaine cuz they asked what was wrong, and then he left." Jeff just looked at him wide eyed then walked away. He went back to his dorm room and found his lighter and stole a cigarette from Nick. He ran to the roof, he needed to be somewhere where he felt he could breathe again. As he went and sat watching the students below he started to cry and shake.
It was Halloween, he should be out with his friends having fun, but instead he was on the roof crying. He went to light the cigarette but dropped the lighter on his arm cuz of the shaking. He felt it burn but at the same time it felt like a release. He decided to do it again. He lit the lighter and laid it on his skin on his arm, it hurt but felt good. He kept burning and crying through the physical and emotional pain. Soon it started to rain; he had stopped burning himself by then now having burns all over his legs and even one in a place that no one would find. The harder it rained the more Jeff cried, he started to beat on the roof, not caring who heard him. As he beat down hard one time his lighter flew out of his hand and fell to the ground. He just threw his head back and cried finally speaking.
"Why did you leave? Why did you leave without saying goodbye? I loved you! I love you!" Jeff curled into a ball as he cried. He wasn't moving he didn't want to. As he laid there he heard people approaching and didn't fight or flinch as someone picked him up and carried him back into the dorm and took him to his room.
"Jeff come on bro, let's get you out of…" said nick as he stopped and saw the burns. Jeff just stood there deer eyed and nick just shook his head. "Hey Scott go get the first aid kit"
'Ok" replied Scott as he ran out to get it.
"You stay right here ok?" said Nick as he went to get Jeff dry clothes and by then Scott came back with the first aid kit. Nick took it into the bathroom and bandaged him up, before helping Jeff get dressed. Then he helps Jeff to bed, and lay next to him knowing that that's what Jeff needed. Scott and Andrew sat on Nick's bed, just looking at their broken friend. Jeff had closed his eyes and kept wishing that it was all a dream. He would wake up and it wouldn't be Nick it would be Thad. As he opened his eyes and looked around at all the dark haired boys none of them were Thad. He busted into tears even more. Jeff cried himself to sleep that night, Nick holding him, Andrew and Scott lying on the other bed.