Harry Potter and the Attack of the Extraneous Details
Rating: T (Warning – Implications of things that every teenager is keenly aware of, to their parents' distress, but nothing really happening)
Author's Notes: Many authors put way too much detail into their stories. One gets the impression that the story only serves as a medium for them to display their obsession or knowledge about some subject. This plot bunny hopped into the room during the reading of one such story. The original version of the story was much shorter. I had thought to highlight the text of the original story, but then thought, that would spoil the fun.
Early in her fourth year at Hogwarts, Ginny Weasley decided to have sex with Harry Potter.
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, by its very name, acknowledged that a school devoted to training young wizards and witches in manipulation of the natural forces, must recognize that sexual forces are among the most powerful of the natural forces, and that there are significant differences in the sexual dimorphic expression of these. As the school was filled with several hundred adolescent males and females going through puberty, and learning to use the natural forces, there was substantial provision made to learn, to express, to explore and to enjoy this facet of their developing lives. To this end, the school appeared to be oversupplied with what were termed 'broom closets', many of which had permanent contraceptive charms applied to prevent the necessity of babysitting services for most of the seventh year students. In addition to that, Madam Poppy Pomfrey (the school's nurse, medi-witch and supplier of medicinal potions for the treatment of everything from gastric distress {due to overeating at feasts} and hangovers {due to other overindulgences typical of teenagers}) had the standing task of roaming the school corridors on weekend evenings, casting additional contraceptive charms into dark corners and seemly empty (due to disillusion charms) classrooms. By their fourth year, many of the students had started losing their virginities, and Ginny Weasley, coming from a family of six older brothers and herself (plus her parents of course), had, from audible evidence of her parents' enjoyment of the sexual act, decided this sounds like fun and did not want to be left out. Her boyfriend, Harry Potter (the boy-who-lived, the star quidditch player and all-around hunk with gorgeous green eyes {although seriously afflicted by nearsightedness, a.k.a. myopia} which had their vision corrected by glasses which would not have been necessary if Harry could ever get the 'reparo eyeballs' charm worked out, instead of displaying his evident incompetence as the frogs he intended to charm always ended up with eight eyeballs looking like amphibious spiders) was the obvious target of her affections, desires and her current intent.
Ginny Weasley (the youngest child and only daughter of Molly and Arthur Weasley [she being a housewife {although at school she had been a first-string chaser on the Gryffindor Quidditch team} running their house {The Burrow}, just outside the little Devon town of Ottery St Catchpole, which lay on the Otter River in Devon, and he being a minor civil servant in the Ministry of Magic, {or so people thought} when he was actually a key intelligence officer in the fight against the pure-blood racist agenda, and supplied information to the aurors {who were the Ministry's police responsible for keeping various political naughtiness at bay}], and the first girl born in to the family in five generations) decided that this Saturday night (September the 27th, which had a full moon, not that she and Harry were likely to notice it, being as they would be inside an interior corridor of Hogwarts castle for their assignation), she was going to finally seduce Harry Potter (believing that Harry, who appeared so innocent and was so vulnerable to teasing by her and her elder twin brothers George and Fred, who were inveterate pranksters and devoted to the idea of keeping their little sister out of the clutches {or at least the beds} of the male students at Hogwarts, being a school filled with adolescent boys eager to discover the joys of sex with just about anyone willing to participate, regardless of gender or species {in some cases, others being a bit more picky about their partners, largely due to the difficulties of removing the fine underhairs of yaks from between their teeth after nuzzling their correspondent} was himself a virgin – she herself qualified as a virgin, at least with respect to actually having not been with a boy, although she did have a rather experienced right hand, which had given her much joy, just as others of the girls in her dorm room had also experienced {both from their own hands and hers, sometimes in solitary exploration and sometimes together in groups of up to eight}, after which the room was too small for even the bed-enlargement spells the young witches cast to provide a more comfortable venue for their activities).
She had put on her favourite and prettiest underwear (which had originally been a plain white cotton bra and knicker set which her mother had purchased at the local big-box store in Ottery St Catchpole {WarlockMart} which sold cheap products made by underpaid and exploited foreign workers in third world countries, and which she had transfigured into a forest green lacy combination, and which, had she actually checked in the mirror before donning her outer clothes, she would have noticed that her aureoles and pubic hair were quite visible through the lace {it is a puzzle to many males that many examples of female underwear [such as those in a bird's-eye weave] are indeed either transparent or at least not opaque, and given that in most societies women wear skirts, it would seem very likely that with such garments some things will be seen that the common understanding would say should not be seen, at least not by the boys, although one explanation is that the visibility is actually very much intended by the girl wearing them [such as by young actresses who had made their professional names by portraying children, but by the facts of aging were now more physically suited for adult roles, many of which in modern films require nudity or at least states of undress, and who for professional reasons need to remind directors and producers that they are not only ready for such roles but also quite prepared {and indeed eager} to show off their 'frillies' or even doff their duds, after all Shirley Temple had never achieved acceptance in adult roles], if for nothing else to keep her male acquaintances completely unable to think clearly, or alternately that the girl wearing the pretty {and pretty transparent} underwear was doing this for her own pleasure and in a quiet rebellion against the standards of a society which was intent on dictating that girls should not show their underwear but dressed them in a fashion where it was almost inevitable, such as with the short skirts worn by cheerleaders, tennis players and figure skaters) under her uniform skirt (grey linen with knife-pleats so that it flowed around her legs and bottom in a way that had the boys drooling as she walked by, not that it was particularly difficult to turn adolescent boys into drooling idiots when a pretty girl walked past {keeping the boys in this state is actually a universal feminine plot to remain in social control and eventually achieve world domination}, as it was still a warm autumn, and Ginny had not yet switched to her winter weight wool skirt, with the larger pleats which didn't conform to her body in nearly so interesting a manner) and blouse (white cotton with mother-of-pearl buttons, which given it was also bought at the low-cost store where her mother shopped, were from clam shells, rather than the more expensive {and elegant} oyster or abalone shells, or if they were of muggle manufacture, plastic, but that would be totally unacceptable for a fashionable young witch), and wore her school robe (black cotton with long sleeves, again rather than the wool winter weight outer robe which became necessary when the Highland winter set in, as the founders of the school had not thought to provide central heat and later schoolmasters, under pressure from anti-muggle sentiments of the pure-blood bigots on the Board of Directors of the school, had been forbidden to update the heating system) over her ensemble.
She took Harry's hand (his left, as she was walking on his left side to be nearer to his heart) as they walked down the hallway (which was about six metres wide and one hundred metres long before turning toward the access stairway to the Astronomy Tower) lit only by torches in sconces positioned about twenty five meters apart, thereby giving completely inadequate illumination for a hallway made of stone blocks where slipping on unseen roughness in the floor could lead to serious injury {it helped that after almost elven hundred years of the feet of students, the floor had been worn to a fine smoothness) on the sixth floor (being as the lower five floors were mainly devoted to classrooms and teachers' offices, leaving the upper floors devoted to storage) , when she pulled him into a vacant broom closet (some of the so-called broom closets were actually used to store brooms for the use of the caretaking staff of house elves working under the direction of Angus Filch, but more numerous of which were actually large rooms for storing brooms used for flying {the quidditch brooms being, of course, kept under lock and key and magical wards by the quidditch grounds, so that they were more convenient for the players and also protected from sabotage by the players from other house teams.} Because of this use, the larger 'broom closets' had large tables where damaged brooms could be repaired or otherwise maintained, but from frequency of actual use {and this was well known to the teaching staff, who in their own school days had used the closets for the exact same purpose} were primarily used for keeping young witches' bottoms supported on a more comfortable surface than would be likely on the stone floor except when cushioning spells had been cast. This provision of tables with curiously soft tops of course did not explain the fact that there were several areas of the walls which had been worn smooth over the years. Unbeknownst to Ginny, this was the self-same broom closet where her parents had each lost their virginities some thirty years before, Molly with a handsome young chaser from Ravenclaw {Morris Greengrass} where she had personally added to the smoothness {or subtracted from the roughness, depending on your point of view} of several spots on one of the walls, and Arthur with a tall statuesque blonde Hufflepuff named Ethyl Flugel, whose muggle great-great grandfather had invented the flugelhorn used in many English brass bands) She kissed him as she slipped her outer robe off her shoulders (it fell to the floor unnoticed at first until she felt it pile up around her legs, so she bent down to pick it up {giving Harry a reasonably clear [and very intentional, although given the low level of lighting, not completely explicit] view down her blouse}). She began to unbutton her blouse (with her left hand, as her right hand was still holding Harry's left), revealing the line of lace at the top of her bra (there was much more lace further down on her {lacy forest-green} bra, but this was not yet visible, and given the low level of lighting, might not had been obvious to her boyfriend who was becoming more distracted by the minute).
Harry gulped at this view of what he had only dreamed of (the adolescent male's imagination being quite specific on these matters, and he had dreamed of Ginny's body with various degrees of accuracy both in terms of clothing and dimensions, and the potential opportunities to determine either through visual or tactile experimentation, exploration, or sneaking a feel), and the implication that this was not all he could expect to see that evening (if you're going to dream, dream big, at least as it applied to Harry's fantasies about Ginny's breasts, however, small or large her actual endowments were, which although modest at the moment {in dimension, if not in her immediate intent}, Ginny was destined to inherit her mother's very generous bosom, even before it became enlarged by nursing her {Molly's not Ginny's, who expected to bear only five of mixed genders, although from the current gleam in Harry's eyes, it could easily end up at fourteen or fifteen} seven children). Harry was also curious about the different textures of the materials of Ginny's clothing, ranging from the stiff smoothness of her linen skirt, the soft cotton of her blouse and the scratchy surface of her lacy bra.
Harry stepped back to get a better view of his girlfriend's gradually more visible brassiere (he had a somewhat serious problem with this manoeuvre in that he had severe myopia {which some of his classmates had wondered at , speculating that Harry couldn't be a very good wizard if he couldn't fix his own eyesight, although there were also speculations that corrective eyesight spells were the one course that Poppy Pomfrey had failed in her medi-witch training and was too embarrassed to admit, and so refused to let Harry do it for himself}, so that if he backed up too far, she would go completely out of focus and the fine detail of her lacy underwear would blend into a soft blur, as he wondered why girls sometimes used the term 'underwear' to refer to their underpants only, and at others used the term to refer to bras, slips, camisoles, and knickers and/or any combination of such articles of feminine clothing). Doing so (and being rather seriously distracted by his view of his girlfriend, who was only a year younger than her brother who was Harry's best friend, other than Hermione who was also his best friend, but was very unlikely to be in a broom closet with Harry removing her clothing, although on occasion Harry had fantasized about exactly that possible event, if he could only get her to quit imagining that there was any kind of a future for her and Ron whose only interests were food and quidditch, and whose sexual imagination had to do with partially clothed witches flying passed him on a quidditch broom, wearing short {cheerleader type} skirts which were always blowing up with the motion of their brooms and their rapid and exquisitely timed passing of the quaffle), he tripped over some brooms which had not been hung up properly. Displaying a total lack of the fine balance and dexterity he was known for at the quidditch pitch (partly due to his distracted mental state, and partly because in the poorly lit room, he had not noticed that six brooms had been set on the floor by the students who had left them there in order to get to the Great Hall for supper, before finishing their maintenance of the brooms, and being hungry adolescents, had neglected to store the brooms in a safe manner, which given that brooms were approximately two metres long, and flying brooms were nearly half a metre wide with the stirrups, which tended to snag on other brooms if not hung up properly, had spilled all over the floor of the room). The last thing he saw before he struck his head on the stone floor and passed out with a concussion was the view up Ginny's skirt (not that it would have provide him with any nefarious or surreptitious thrill as, with the directionality of the lighting from a single torch along the southwest side of the wall of the room {Scottish Granite from quarries near Ben Nevis} the shadow of her skirt seriously limited any possible clear view of her lacy forest-green underpants {which she had worn especially so that Harry could have a good view of them, whether she later kept them on or not [and she had definitely intended on them coming off], although eventually she was going to have to take them off as she changed for bed of a shower, whichever she decided on when she returned to her dorm room, which she shared with six other fourth-year witches in Gryffindor House}) he completely failed to appreciate at the time.
Ginny looked down at the pile of her unconscious boyfriend lying on the floor, and realizing that, once again, she would be spending the night chastely holding the hand of her comatose paramour lying in his regular bed in the infirmary (and over which Madam Pomfrey had now posted a sign saying 'Harry Potter's Bed {Reserved}' because of his regular occupancy of it), and then the elderly witch would hover like a vulture around the young couple, making sure that Ginny did not crawl into the bed with Harry to cop a feel of her own, and dream of Harry doing the same for and to her. She grimaced, and said "Oh crap!"