Sooo... I don't know if I shoulh believe they're over. I like to believe they aren't (;

Right, so. I was bored. And I was sort of sad Vanessa didn't come to the PCAs. (ZAC WON! YAY!)

So, yeah. It's 2.10a, so I'd better go to sleep now. xx S.

The dark haired girl let out a heavy sigh as she let herself fall backwards into the pillows. She wanted nothing more than just cuddle his pillow to her chest and smell him. He had always smelled of ocean and nature, but also sweet like cotton candy and a bit manly due to his aftershave.

In her head she had tossed several scenarios back and forth, all ending with him asking her to be his date to tonight's award show. But he never asked her.

When she had been nominated for Favorite Star Under 25 she had never even considered going alone to the show, nor did she ever consider laying in her huge comfy bed alone on this night. But things had changed for her and now she was exactly that; alone.

Just as she was about to turn off the light and fall into a dreamless and deep sleep, her phone beeped and vibrated. Before it could fall off the edge of her nighstand she caught it and opened the message.

U sad? ;)

She knew who wrote it without looking at the ID. With a smile plastered on her ace she wrote back.

I'm happy for u. congrats baby

She typed the last word without thinking, just because she had always called him that. Her lips formed a straight line as she deleted the last 4 words of the text and put a smiley instead. After hitting the sent button she lay back down with her phone lying next to her. It felt wrong that she still felt this nice tingly feeling in her stomach whenever she texted with him or was just seeing his face, even his name somewhere.

After staring at her phone for what felt like hours but actually were only minutes, her eyes slowly closed and she drifted to sleep.

ZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZV

The sound of the door bell woke her up. For a moment she thought she might have imagined it and she had just awoken because Shadow moved, but then the bell ringed again. With her mind full of sleep, she went downstairs to open the door.

When she saw him standing there, in the middle of the night, she blinked a few time not sure what to say. Due to lack of brains so soon after getting out of bed she came up with only one word. „What?"

„You look tired." He ignored her question and put on a slightly worried face when he looked at her after she let him in. She could smell alcohols in his breath and his voice slurred a little.

„No shit." She glanced at the clock that hung in her foyer. „It's almost 4am and I was sleeping."

„Really, it's that late already?" He seemed genuinely surprised. Where had he been all night?

„No, I was just kidding you." She had to smile at his confused expression. „Yes, Zac. It is 4 o'clock almost. I was being sarcastic."

„Oh." He smiled the crooked smile she loved so much. The one where his dimples showed and his teeth and just a bit of his tongue showed. Within a second his expression changed and he looked into her eyes. When he spoke after a few moments it wasn't louder than a whisper. „You should have been there."

„You know why I didn't come." She had told him that she had to be at a family gathering, but really she didn't want to be in the same room but not sitting next to him. And then there were all the press people who'd ask them about the break-up and all the people that would be starring.

„No, you should have been there." He took her head in his face and made her look at him. „With me."

„No, Zac. No, no, no, no." Tears were streaming into her eyes and she had to fight to keep them from falling. „Don't start, please."

„You promised." Now he was nearly crying, too. „You promised, Vanessa."

„Zac, I-"

„You promised we'd always be together."

„But we're not, even when we are. Half the time we're not even in the same time zone."

„No mountains too high, no oceans too wide."

„Zac, please. Stop. You're drunk."

„No, I'm not. Well, yes, I am. But… remember? ‚We'll keep dancing wherever we go next'."

„Yes, Zac, but that was 2 years ago. A lot has changed. We have changed."

„With every step we just keep getting better."

„Can you just stop quoting that goddamn song?"

„It's our song, Vanessa. Remember we promised to never stop dancing and whenever we can't see a way to keep going we'd remember the lyrics." They were both crying only inches away from each other and Zac gripping Vanessa's hand. „What we have is worth fighting for."

„But" Vanessa had to swallow before she could go on. „But, we've fought enough, Zac. We have to accept that it's not working."

„No, Vanessa. It worked for 5 years." He made her look into his eyes again. „I love you too much to let you go. It hurts too much."

„Please stop. Please." She couldn't speak. She was sobbing too hard. He pulled her close and hugged her until the sobbing subsided. When she was able to speak again, she whispered „It hurt too much. I won't survive the next time you let me fall."

„But I won't let you go again. Never."

„No, I can't. I just can't." She wasn't sure what to say except that. It had hurt too much to realize it was over and now he wanted her back. Just like that.

„Nessa, I'm sorry. I'm so so so sorry. I don't know why I ever did this to you. But I know that I want you back. And I know that I want to-„

„You want to what?" With tear still burning in her eyes she looked at him.

„I-I want to…" He let go of her hands for the first time and got on his knees. Now he was searching for something in his tuxedo pocket. „I want to marry you."

She couldn't speak. She couldn't breathe. She fainted.

ZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZVZV

The next thing she saw was a white wall. It was all a dream. All those things had never happened.

„Vanessa?" She heard him say her name and only then did she notice this wasn't her bedroom. It was a completely different room.

„Where am I?" She was furiously looking around and making out people that had gathered around her. „And why are you all here?"

„You're in hospital, sweetie." Her mother took her hand and squeezed it.

„Oh." She didn't remember anything. Did she have an accident? Or had she been robbed?

„Nessa, don't you remember anything at all?" His voice sounded weird. Hurt, hopeful, worried.

„No… not really." She closed her eyes again and put her hand to her forehead. Something cold touched her skin. „What is this?"

She looked at the ring in shock. It wasn't a dream. It was all real. He had asked her to marry him. Oh my god. Ohmygod. This was the hugest ring she had ever worn. The diamond in the center was enormous and there were rubies around it. Rubies were her favorite.

„V?" For the first time she looked at him. He was still wearing his suit and his chin was covered with stubbles. Under his eyes were dark rings and he held out his hand to her.

„I didn't dream all that?" She sounded like a little girl. It seemed so unreal to her.

„No, I guess not." He smiled that smile again. She saw his dimples had to smile, too. With his eyes locked to hers, he whispered „You didn't answer me, though."

She took a deep breath and looked at her ring again. „Yes, Zac. I promise to marry you."