AN: Set in Season 3 mostly during Ghost World, however many things that occur during ghost world and previous episodes will probably not get mentioned as it is not from Elena's point of view. Also the ending is very different and does not follow TVD plot at all. If your really confused just PM me ;)

Disclaimer: I do not own TVD, it's plot or any of its characters they all belong to L.J Smith, Julie Plec and The CW.

Jeremy had been numb for a very long time, cold and dead, he had thought he was long over her, he had attributed the numbness to his parents and Vicki's death. So when he saw her again, standing there, trying to protect him he had laughed in disbelief. Surely it wasn't true, Anna couldn't be here, it wasn't possible. Had Anna come back to haunt him for his past mistakes? He had seen Vicki first, but Anna had cautioned him, warned him about Vicki. Jeremy had grown angry he had lashed out harshly at her. What did Anna know about Vicki? Vicki would never hurt him, he had snarled at Anna. And she had smiled sadly and disappeared. Jeremy had wanted to hurt her, make her feel the same pain he felt at her presence but that had backfired on him. The sadness had hit him like a waterfall and Jeremy had been left choking. It had been a long time since Jeremy had ever felt such emotion. He had grown rather emotionless, quite used to the constant drama that surrounded his sister, Elena and the Salvatore's. Nothing surprised him anymore, this was quite refreshing. Jeremy was intrigued, that's all, or at least that's what he told himself.

So he had let Anna come back, apparently he had to be thinking of her for her to appear, even though he knew he was making a mistake, the dead didn't just get to walk among the living and Anna had cheated death twice now. As time passed, he began to think less of Vicki and it had become a rarity to see her. Anna however practically began to live his life with him and Jeremy had never felt more alive, more in control, more certain of what he was doing. It became a thrilling game to see if anyone would catch them talking or rather catch him talking to thin air. There had been close encounters, Jeremy was sure that Matt suspected something, each close encounter left him feeling breathless and full of adrenalin. Sometimes he and Anna would just sit and talk, other times he would question Anna about where she had been, what she had done. Jeremy had never talked more openly to a person before. It had taken Anna's death, Jeremy thought sardonically to himself, for them to let go of the lies and be truly honest with one another.

When they had first met it had been Anna who had lied to him so Jeremy had reasoned to himself that it was okay to lie to her because she had lied to him first. But two lies don't make a right Jeremy, his Dad would have told him if he had still been alive. Anna had lied to him to bring her Mom back whereas he had lied to her, to what, turn himself into a vampire so he could be with Vicki? He had used Anna's feeling for him and what was worse was, that he had known what he was doing was wrong but he had suppressed it. He sometimes wished that they had never met, maybe Anna wouldn't be dead now and he wouldn't be tormented with how things could have gone differently. But then he remembers how they had met and the smile lights up his face. No he couldn't imagine not knowing Anna. He had known there was something special about Anna the moment he had met her. He hadn't talked to another female besides Vicki in a long time so he had ignored Anna's weirdness and had taken her apology at face value. A laugh bubbles inside of him, as he remembers how awkwardly they had introduced themselves. They had both been unused to talking to the 'living' after all.

Um, I'm Anna

Uh, Jeremy

Of course he knows now that the Anna back then hadn't been sorry about anything. That if given the chance Anna would go back and do everything the same way she had done before except she would probably kill John Gilbert the moment he stepped into town. Jeremy couldn't blame her, if he was in her position he'd do the same. Anger filled him at the thought of John. Yes the man had redeemed himself in the end by dying for Elena but he had still killed Pearl and Anna on the orders of another vampire no less. Plus living for someone was far harder than dying for them. John Gilbert was a hypocrite in Jeremy's eyes, he may have been his uncle and Jeremy may have loved him but he would never forgive him for killing Anna.

xxx

Sometimes Jeremy thinks that everything would be better if Anna wasn't a vampire but deep down Jeremy knows that Anna wouldn't be Anna if she wasn't a vampire. Anna unlike Stefan and even Damon to some degree had utterly accepted the curse and had changed it into a gift. From the stories that Anna told, Jeremy gathered that Anna hadn't killed humans in a very long time. She only killed when she turned humans into vampires and even then, before Mystic Falls, Anna had turned only 6 people. If Anna hadn't been a vampire, Jeremy knows that she wouldn't have her most attractive traits; her pushiness and awkwardness. Jeremy knows that as a human Anna must have had those traits for them to be magnified in the afterlife but Anna was overly pushy bordering on bossy and Jeremy wouldn't change her for the world.

I'm being pushy again aren't I

He had laughed and smiled in agreement but he hadn't told her how much he adored that about her. His musings are interrupted by a laugh and for a moment he is confused but as his eyes fall upon Anna, he smiles a true smile.

"Anna!" he says a grin stretching across his face. He can tell Anna is shocked by the open display of emotion. While she knows that he isn't angry with her presence she hasn't seen him smile like that in a long time.

"Jeremy," she says her voice coloured in slight confusion. Jeremy gestures for her to sit down on his bed which Anna does, a small smile making itself at home on her face.

"What has you in such a good mood?" She questions curiously. Her head unconsciously tilting to the right. Jeremy smiles at the familiar movement. A light blush grazes Anna's cheeks as she sees his smile.

"Fond memories, of when we first met," he says looking at her from the corner of his eye awaiting her response and she doesn't disappoint as a brilliant blush blooms across her face.

"Jeremy!" She whines "you promised to never bring that up again," she says petulantly. He laughs once again surprising himself with how open he is being with her.

"Maybe we can have a fright night and rent a whole bunch of vampire movies," Jeremy mocks her and Anna glares at him, grabbing his pillow, she throws it carelessly at his head. He tilts his head avoid it, giving her a satisfied smirk. She crosses her arms and sneers playfully at him. He just chuckles at her fondly while she pouts. Their eyes connect and the bed shakes with the force of their laughter.

xxx

Shock overcomes Jeremy, he can touch her. He doesn't know how it's possible, he doesn't understand but he is ecstatic. His hands move immediately to her head, he runs his fingers through her hair desperately. His eyes search hers, seeking, hoping to find reassurance, that she too can feel him. He finds his confirmation when he sees the stunned expression across her face. It's the most adorable thing he's seen.

And before he knows it their kissing and she's the best thing he's ever tasted, she tastes far better than he remembers, he can taste the unique blend of strawberries and coconut that is distinctively Anna. He's kissing her like a starved animal who hasn't been fed in months and he can't stop not even when the door opens to reveal Caroline Forbes who will undoubtedly tell his sister and Elena would tell Bonnie, she would feel that it was her duty. But he doesn't think of the consequences he doesn't think about Bonnie, for the first time Jeremy acts selfishly, all he can think about is Anna he's surrounded by her, he's drowning in her. And when Anna pulls away reluctantly, he whines and tries to pull her back again but the look on Caroline's face stops him and his stomach drops when he thinks about Bonnie. His Bonbon who he just cheated on. He chokes up and can't look at Anna as she reaches out to try and comfort him. Some dark place in his mind blames her but he shuns that thought as quickly as it comes, he doesn't remember who kissed who but even if Anna had kissed him, he had kissed her back and enjoyed it.

xxx

Jeremy sighs to himself, the mistakes were in the past. He has to move on and forget Anna she was a ghost for Christ's sake. He was fucking mental if he thought he could have a future with one. Elena was right, what was he doing letting a girl like Bonnie walk away for a ghost. He opens the door to his bedroom but pauses in shock as he see's Anna lying draped across his bed covers, her left arm hanging loosely over the edge. Anna's curly black hair lies around her in a casual halo. Her mouth is slightly open as she takes in light, unneeded gasps of breath. Her face looks relaxed and calm, her forehead smoothed out with no signs of worry. Jeremy feels a tug at his heartstrings and unconsciously a smile overtakes his face.

This was why he was letting a girl like Bonnie go, while he undoubtedly loves Bonnie just like she loves him, Bonnie is incapable of making him question everything yet make him feel completely safe. With Bonnie he feels safe like in a bubble, he knows Bonnie will always be there, he can rely on Bonnie in ways he will never be able to rely on anyone else. But Anna is his desperately needed wind on a extremely hot summer day. Both girls have over protectiveness in common, with Anna he finds it cute, she is after all 500 or so years older than him, but he easily gets annoyed with Bonnie, that's where most of their arguments stem from. He can't survive without Anna but he will be able to survive without Bonnie. And with that thought in mind Jeremy shuts the door behind him, his mind finally at ease. He has made his choice, Bonnie would be hurt but she would move on, if he stays with her he will be using her. He leans forward to awake Anna. She sits up confusion overtakes her face as she realizes where she is.

"Jeremy?" she asks puzzled. He nods and turns on the the night lamp. "Oh Jeremy I'm so sorry ... I.I didn't mean to .. Bonnie" she stumbles out in a panic not knowing what to say. He clasps his hand lightly around hers.

"Anna their planning on closing the veil," he says looking at her seriously. Anna's expression falls.

"I know I can't stay here Jer," she says forcing a smile on her face. "I just hope I find my Mama before they close the veil, maybe there'll be peace for us," she says in a forced light tone.

"Don't!" Jeremy says. At Anna's confused expression, he continues. "Don't pretend that everything is fine. I don't want you to go. I love you Anna. I choose you." He says simply. He has never said those words before, they should feel foreign falling from his lips but Jeremy feels a deep sense of rightness and he knows that it's the truth.

He loves Anna.

Anna is shocked, she doesn't move for a full minute, Jeremy counts, but then she beams. She throws her arms around him and rests her head on his broad shoulder. He breathes in the smell of her freshly shampooed hair.

"I love you too," she mumbles into his chest and the smile that stretches across Jeremy's face looks painful. Jeremy knows he'll never tire of hearing those words.

xxx

It is ten minutes later that he and Anna realize they haven't talked about the most important issue.

"There's a way." Anna says. Jeremy knows there is a 'but' coming otherwise Anna would have mentioned it before. "It requires a sacrifice," she caries on reluctantly and Jeremy knows that it was too good to be true. Anna must have seen something on his face as she quickly detaches herself from him and jumps off the bed. Her eyes flash angrily as she stares at him.

"How dare you Jeremy Grayson Gilbert!" she screeches and for one moment Jeremy is reminded of his mother. They do say that you tend to fall for a woman who shares a similar personality with your mother, he thinks amusingly to himself. His smile angers Anna even more and he can practically feel the 'Medusa Stare'. "I would never think about killing someone even if it meant I could live again." She snarls. As much as her anger turns him on, Jeremy realizes that things are getting out of control.

"I'm sorry Annie," he says softly wrapping his arms around her. "Forgive me." He pleads and she can't help but collapse into his arms that surround her like a safety net. She nods reluctantly half angry at herself for giving in so easily. She sighs and looks up at him.

"It requires an emotional sacrifice most people are not willing to do that," she explains. "Because once you give up that emotion you can never feel it again." Jeremy still doesn't understand though.

"But that's easy, just give up a negative emotion," he says "like jealousy." Anna laughs and shakes her head.

"No Jer! You can't just give up an emotion and expect to be stable, there's always a balance, to live again I would have to give up an emotion but I'd have to increase one too!" She sighs in disbelief and bemusement when Jeremy fails to, yet again, understand.

"Say for example I choose to give up jealousy, I'd have to increase a positive emotion, to keep the balance, so I would feel that emotion more. It would be worse for me because I'm a vampire, all our emotions already get increased, say I choose happiness I would literally be giddy All. The. Time." And Jeremy understands but he wants Anna.

"I don't want to force you to do something but Anna I'll ALWAYS be there for you, any emotion you can't feel, I'll feel enough for both of us." Jeremy promises her, his eyes begging her to believe him. Anna looks indecisive but her desire to be with Jeremy wins out.

"Okay," she whispers cautiously. "I'll do it. But I choose to get rid of guilt and not jealousy. If I can never feel jealousy then how will I ever make sure you remain only mine," she smiles mischievously. And Jeremy laughs, his deep baritone mixes with her mezzo-soprano. He leans over and kisses her briefly pulling away before she can deepen it, they have to do the ritual before Bonnie closes the veil between their world and the other side. They could kiss later.

They had all eternity.

Review ...

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