A/N: For my close friend, whom I've known for around a decade and counting. Happy birthday, dear. I hope you like this :)
Warning - this contains spoilers for Persona 3 and the Pokémon Mystery Dungeon games, mainly for Gates to Infinity.
"...So this is the final stratum of Tartarus."
As Big Sis says this, she raises her head and looked to the marble white staircase that had long been sealed - until today. Light is pouring down from the point the stairs meet the next floor that will lead us on the last lap of our quest, and when I think about that again, I can't help but feel a strange tug in my chest and a knot in my throat that wouldn't go away no matter how much saliva I swallow.
"Hey, you doin' okay? You look a little pale..." Senior Machamp says as he turns towards me. It isn't long until everyone else does, too, and as I felt their eyes on me for a reason I normally didn't deal with, there was a tinge of warmth rising in my cheeks.
"I'm fine," I say.
"You sure about that? Don't go pushing yourself because you feel like you need to take responsibility for this. Remember, we're all in this together. Alright?"
"…Yeah."
"Heyy, just take it easy," Del-Del speaks up from behind me. He's by my side by the time I wanted to turn around, and he bends down to pat me on the head. The long, bushy fur along his arms causes my nose to itch, and I can't resist a sneeze, but Del-Del smiles all the same before bringing a fist to his chest. "After all, you have me around!"
"And there he goes again," Togeri sighs, slapping her wing against her forehead. Even though Togeri is as exasperated as ever at Del-Del's – lame, I might add – jokes, I know she is laughing somewhere in her heart. I giggle weakly at the thought.
"Mr Machamp and Mr Delphox are right, though," Helios says. He looks at me with a smile that reaches his bright, baby blue eyes, like the ones I'd seen when we were taking strolls through the Central Plaza at night. "We're a team, and we decided to face this together. You have us to fall back on, so please...don't push yourself unnecessarily."
Kero, who is by Helios' side, barks his agreement, wagging his long, thin tail. Seeing it brings a smile to my face.
Then, Big Sis Weavile steps up to me, and my heart gives a leap when I notice her staring at me. On reflex, I shuffle my front paws, and give myself a mental kick for doing that, especially when her lips pull to a very thin line.
"...It'll be alright," she says with her warm, reassuring tone, and part of me wants to look away from her eyes because I know that she had seen through me, but didn't want to bring it up in front of everyone else. I could hear the unspoken "I know you're hiding something but you don't have to tell me now" in her gaze towards me, and my ears droop a little at that.
But it wouldn't be becoming of me to hold everyone back, so I take in a deep breath and straighten my front legs, and declare the commencement of our final task. Del-Del pumps a fist in the air, and, upon my request, leads the way up the staircase. I wait for the others to leave before I start moving myself, and when I notice Ariel and Porygon turning back, I send a cheery smile in their way, becoming all too aware of the heaviness of my paws with every step I take.
-XXII-
It all happened too quickly.
When I had dealt the final blow to the Nyx Avatar – or what most of the townsfolk referred to as the "Bittercold" – I thought that that would finally be the end that everyone had been hoping for. The object shaped as the snowflake with the elaborate pattern started crumbling, and that was when I could hear Senior and Del-Del muttering cheers under their breaths, while Big Sis and the others watched silently with bated breaths.
But, contrary to our expectations, the crack in the Bittercold's body did not mean its defeat. Rather, it was a signal – a signal that it was about to make a full recovery and make its comeback, like a fallen phoenix soaring even higher than it did before.
"Everyone! No!"
Ariel calls out, before she collapses to the ground, crushed by the weight of the ominous winds expelled by the Bittercold. Just like the rest of us.
The crack on the Bittercold's body then unravel a porcelain mask-like face. It has an abnormally sharp chin, and a chilling smile that touches its hollow eye sockets, and the winds continue to gush out of its body that is quickly melting away into a massive, slender figure dressed in what looks like a black, feathery gown made from a compression of shadowy aura. It keeps pushing and pushing, forcing us further and further into the ground while it itself ascends into the sky where the moon that had been dyed a sickly shade of green is waiting.
"It... It, can't...be..."
"Damm...it... This can't...can't end like this..."
"We fought...and got here... I won't...let it be for naught..."
Around me I hear my teammates rousing, forcing themselves to stand even though the pressure must be crushing their lungs and draining their stamina. Even Ariel, who normally keeps her distance from fighting, is telling herself to get up, to rectify for her mistake and take on the responsibility for not being able to sense the impending misfortune that is about to befall us – and the rest of the Pokémon world. The world that I had sworn to protect, even from before I had come here and met everyone...
At that thought, the weight on my body lifts. And in that moment I feel my breathing stabilise, with confusion and clarity hitting me at the same time.
...Oh, that's right... Of course it would. After all, I'm not "of this world". But I became accustomed to it, and because of that the Nyx Avatar's aura was able to affect me, even for a little while.
And, because of that, I know what it is that I have to do. What it is that only I can do.
"My lady..."
My ears perk up as that voice I have grown so familiar with whispers in my mind. I blink, twice, and the figure who once visited me in my dreams fades into existence before my eyes.
...Galahad.
"Your voice reached me, my lady. And when I heard that, I knew I had to come before you."
But...why are you looking like that again? I thought...the curse...
Galahad shakes his head slowly, and even through the apparition-like mist enveloping his body I can see the kind smile on his face.
"I thank you from the bottom of my heart. For showing me the world you now live in – and oh, what a beautiful world it is – and for validating that even I can be capable of love... For that, I am forever in your debt. But... I cannot simply abandon my former duties for my own selfish gains. I have an obligation to fulfill, and I will see that to the end."
But Galahad, I don't mind. What's important is for you to be happy.
"I am, my lady. It has been a great pleasure being able to aid you. And it would certainly make me happier...if I can perform this final service for you. My lady…no, my former partner."
...Galahad...
"My ally, who once fought alongside me," he says, shifting closer, "I am aware of the decision you have made. Please, allow me to ask you this. Is that...your final answer?"
I fall silent at this, and, with full knowledge of the consequences, I nod.
"...Are you absolutely certain?" Galahad murmurs. "If you choose to do so, you may never be able to return to the world from whence you came. Neither would you be able to remain here, in this world, and all traces of your existence would be wiped from the memories of this world's inhabitants... Please, my lady. Do reconsider."
I don't. Because there isn't a need to.
If it had been the me before who was asked this...the me who had come here with no memories about my former self and the world I came from, the me who hadn't met the people living here... That me would've probably taken up Galahad's suggestion.
But, not the me now.
I'm prepared for this.
"...Very well." Galahad stretches out his arms, and a sphere of power gathers in front of the horn on his chest. "Then... Please, accept this."
I close my eyes, and let the waves that the sphere has been giving off sweep over me. With every wave I am stricken with a voice and vivid memories of my life as a temporary resident of this beautiful world.
Prinplup, who stood up for me even when the rest of the town doubted me...
Mr and Mrs Jellicent, who gave me little treasures they'd unconvered when they were going hunting with their beloved son, from times ago...
Rapidash, who encouraged me always with her smiles and words even though she was shouldering a burden...
Gloom, who treated everyone kindly even though they shunned her...
Cryogonal, who watched over Galahad and me and laid down his life for us to buy us more time…
Chingling, who showed me around town and taught me that even a little voice could be heard...
Leavanny, who made our team bandanas and often gave me his personal handicrafts, even though he wasn't supposed to stay in this town...
Mightyena, who turned over a new leaf and always kept our finances in check and always brought in the latest items in his store for us...
Medicham, who would throw a party for us whenever we accomplished something great for the town, and treated us like family...
Ampharos, who showed me the brilliance of life, however small or insignificant it appeared, even as illness slowly devoured him...
For all of these people, and for all of my friends—
I want to give them this chance. This precious, precious chance that shouldn't be taken away from them.
With my body bathed in a faint glow, I stand, to the bewilderment of my comrades around me. Galahad bows, and disappears.
"Wha...?!"
"H-how...can you...stand...?"
Without me consciously willing it to, my body rises, the ball of light and power that was once in Galahad's hands propelling me towards the Bittercold.
"Wait... Where...are you going...?!"
"Don't...fight alone...!"
"Stop...!"
I turn back, and smile.
"We won't let you...bear this burden alone...!"
"C'mon, stand... Stand up...!"
"Whine..."
I want to tell them, no, it's alright, this is what I am meant to do. This is what I came here for. Thank you, thank you for everything you have done for me – and I'm sorry, that I never told you anything. Of course, I wasn't okay with it, when I heard about it...because I was scared. Scared of how you would all react if I told you that this'd be the last resort... But, this is the only way.
So please, just this one last time...lend me your strength.
In that same instant as the thought flashes through my mind, I can feel my body shifting forms as the radiance of the light blinds me. Except this time, it's unlike any other transformation I've been through before.
There are no gills or fins growing on my body, neither is my fur turning into spikes nor warmed with a pool of fire within me. I do not feel the gem forming on my forehead, nor the warmth indicative of any rings on my body. My tail and ears haven't turned particularly light, and I don't feel any chills in the slightest.
Even in my blinded state, I look to the Nyx Avatar, and then to the moon behind it, and pray, fervently, for my voice and everyone else's to reach them.
The last thing I remember, is the light dying away and the moon returning to its normal colour, and the distant voice of someone telling me to stay strong and smile, before my world turns completely white.
-XXII-
"You know... I consider myself lucky."
After I said that, Porygon glances up at me, but doesn't say a word. I can only smile, and wag my formerly bushy tail mildly.
It's the truth, I wanted to add. In the first place, I'm not supposed to be here right now, and yet here I am, here I've been, still talking and getting along with the people who welcomed me into their community. It's also a miracle how they all managed to cling onto their memories of me as well as Nyx, Galahad, and Cryogonal, even though they were supposed to have been wiped out along with my and Galahad's existence. So, really, I do think I'm lucky. Very much so, in fact.
"Is something the matter?" Porygon asks, in a slightly robotic, and yet slightly emotive, tone. "You appear to be...tired."
"Really? Must be from all the parties Mr Medicham has been throwing. Everyone's still knocked out at the inn," I chuckle.
"Yes, it did seem...exhausting. Shall I tuck you into your bed, then?"
"I think I can settle for a nap like this," I mutter, in a drunken sort of bliss, as I lean onto Porygon's jagged body. "I just...need a breather."
"Understood," Porygon replies sympathetically, and then she falls silent. From the corner of my eye, I take a glimpse of her face, and it's crossed with indifference and frustration, with melancholy and confusion. I've never seen her look like that before...or maybe it's just my eyesight that's misleading me.
"—ank you."
"Hm?" I blink. It's only now that I realise that I had dozed off.
"…It is nothing," Porygon says, and I think I sense a smile in there somewhere.
I hear footsteps running from the distance, going in a frenzy of tap tap taps. Even while I'm resting on the cool surface of Porygon's body, the only Pokémon out of all of us who doesn't have a beating heart, I can feel her shaking with every step that is taken. It's kind of rocky, in a good and comfortable way, and my mind starts to drift again.
The door to our team's headquarters bursts open, and I startle awake, as though the entrance's opening sent a rush of energy flowing into my body. I tilt my head to the door, and I take in a sharp breath.
"...Hey."
"S-Senior Bisharp?"
"You look surprised," the senior I know as Senior Bisharp jokes tenderly, with a smile that I can barely make out. Porygon nudges me gently, and before I know it, I'm in Senior Bisharp's arms instead, and when I turn to find her I see her levitating up the stairs, and I relax.
Senior is careful with the way he holds me – not too tight, and not too loose; not too close, and not too far either. It actually hurts a little to be touching him, but I make sure not to show it. Besides, the giddiness I'm feeling from the joy at seeing Senior well again makes the pain void of any significance to me.
"Why...?" I hear myself ask, looking up at him.
"Guess it's cuz I could hear all of you," Senior Bisharp says, smiling wryly.
"Ah… Were we that noisy?" I can feel specks of warmth dusting my cheeks as I look away.
"Nah, it's more like… Your voices managed to reach me."
I smile, knowing exactly what that meant, and how that feels like.
Senior Bisharp rests a hand on my back. "Sounds like you guys have been through a lot. ...It's been rough on ya."
I shake my head, my new ribbon on my new ear naturally tangling around Senior's arm. It stings, but it doesn't matter.
"...Thanks," Senior whispers, lowering his head until I can feel the tip of his face touch the top of my head. He doesn't explain what he means by that, and I don't ask him, because there isn't a need for either.
And we stay like that, Senior's face against my head, my ribbon strands around his arm, until I feel the dizziness consuming me entirely. My breathing slows, and my heart is so light I can barely feel it against my chest.
"You must be tired from all the partying. I heard all your cheers, even in my sleep." Senior Bisharp laughs. It tickles, and it makes me giggle, too. "...Go on. You can finally rest easy. Let me be the one to watch over you now. Don't worry, I'll still be here when you wake up."
"Mm..." My lips move on their own. Then my eyelids gradually lower, and I can't fight against it. They feel heavy, somehow; I might even call it the heaviest part of my body right now.
Even as Senior Bisharp shifts, and I hear his voice speaking directly into my ear, I can't shake the creeping sleep away, and instead find myself growing ever more distant, my body ever lighter, as though I'm soaring through the air like the day everyone's voices and determined thoughts lifted me high above the ground, and pushing me forward to where the moon had been waiting and shining its bright, marble white light upon me...
I close my eyes.