Title: Stupid Ororo
Author: Viral
Author's Notes: Never written from Sage's point of view. T'was a fun story to write. Some subtle sexual themes. Nothing explicit. Have fun. oo
I apologize for being so blunt, but the truth is that you are stupid, Ororo. I suppose now I have to explain myself before I'm the target of a "stray" lightning bolt? You are an African American woman with beautiful features: full lips, blue eyes, hair the color of the clouds, and a warm skin tone. You are the mistress of the elements! Do you not realize the superiority you have by being able to control the weather? Yet, you remain stupid.
It's not often we see a smile on your face. I'm smart enough to realize why. It's not because you are worried about the weather going crazy. A little smile isn't going to create a tornado unless you want it to. You're always frowning and serious-faced because you're lonely. You don't have companion. You haven't had a real companion since Forge.
Sure, there was Logan but that moron was too busy chasing Jean and you were too busy trying to act like he wasn't important. Did you not see the ever-increasing attraction and sensual frustration growing between you two? It was so hot I could thoroughly cook a twelve inch-thick steak. But you were too busy being superficial. He was short, feral, and wild. You couldn't be seen in public with an animal, could you? Your subtle arrogance has got to be one of your worst qualities.
It's that type of narcissism that hides behind a shade of humility. You are a nice person on the outside, never looking down on your fellow brother or sister. You are Ororo: mother of compassion! There's not one X-Man or X-Woman who shows as much love as you. When you have a problem, take it to Ororo. When you're having a rainy day, who there can help you to make it sunny, but Ororo?
It's all a big show isn't it? I don't know who you're showing off to or why you find it so necessary to impress yourself. Do you not notice that despite all the good things people say and feel about you, you still feel absolutely alone and miserable? You are absolutely stupid. How can we love you back if we don't even know who you really are?
That's where you screwed up with Remy. Oh yes, I am going to bring up Remy so you can cry in your pillow at night when nobody's watching! It's obvious that you two feel more than just a family-type love for each other. The intense look in your eyes when you're in each other's presence. Remy notices it. That's why he kissed you that night. Instead of telling him how you felt, though, you tried to play the mother of compassion role. Too worried about Rogue's feelings and how it would affect your relationship with her. I'm sorry, but before you try to make others happy you need to be happy yourself! But you stayed quiet with Remy. You dismissed the entire situation and put a smile on your face when you brought him home to Rogue. Everybody could see it was fake – even Rogue. But that selfish –
But I digress.
Need I bring up Scott to make my point a little clearer? Jean and Emma aren't the only ones who fantasize about finding out what color eyes are behind those shades, are they? I didn't think so. How many times has Jean died? Oh, approximately too-many-times-to-count-million. Who cares about treading on dangerous waters? If you wanted the man you should have taken him! Now Emma has him trapped in her web and even though you still don't like her that much, you'd rather see her happy than sad.
Have you not learned anything while training? This world is survival of the fittest! You can't be worried about other people's happiness. You have a responsibility: me first! That's right, I'm teaching you a lesson. It isn't pride. It's realizing that you should be the most important person in your life. Stop trying to be a philanthropist! You're giving away all the goods and leaving yourself with the junk: misery, pain, loneliness, and grief.
Put a smile on your face, put on a tight-fittin dress, and work that ba-thonk-a-thonk until you catch every man you've ever set your eyes on.
All jokes aside – don't be stupid, Ororo. You have the goods girl. Not only do you have the ability to control the weather but you also have the ability to enslave the male race. Be happy for once, okay?
Just don't touch my man.