Kiss the Boy

They remixed the song from that movie they were forced to watch in Muggle Studies over winter break 5th year when they realized why he wouldn't stop talking about the Golden Boy. That is, Pansy came up with the idea, Blaise helped her, and Crabbe and Goyle learned the new version of the song once they did it.

There you see him
Standing there across the hall
Yeah, he's got a lot of gall
But there's something about him
And you don't know why
But you're dying to try
You wanna kiss the boy

Yes, you want him
Look at him, you know you do
Possible he wants you too
There is one way to ask him
It don't take a word
Not a single word
Go on and kiss the boy

Sha la la la la la
My oh my
Look like the boy too shy
Ain't gonna kiss the boy
Sha la la la la la
Ain't that sad?
Ain't it a shame?
Too bad, he gonna miss the boy

Then's your moment
Alone in detention
Boy you better do it then
No time will be better
He don't say your name
And he won't say your name
Until you kiss the boy

Sha la la la la la
Don't be scared
You got the mood prepared
Go on and kiss the boy
Sha la la la la la
Don't stop now
Don't try to hide it how
You want to kiss the boy

Sha la la la la la
Float along
And listen to the song
The song say kiss the boy
Sha la la la la
The music play
Do what the music say
You got to kiss the boy
You've got to kiss the boy
You wanna kiss the boy
You've gotta kiss the boy
Go on and kiss the boy

Draco was sure he would die from being so annoyed. Every day at Hogwarts, January through June, he had to listen to one or more of them sing or hum part of the song. The first time he heard it, they had gagged him and tied him to a chair and positively performed it. After they let him go, no matter how much he insisted, they would not believe that he did not have a crush on Harry bloody Potter.

He was thrilled when summer came around. True, he did see his "friends" (though now he thought of them as his tormentors) over summer break, but he did not see all of them daily. In fact, he only heard the song twice over break.

When he got on the train back to Hogwarts at the end of the summer, he was nervous about having to hear it again. But thankfully, they did not even bring it up during the entire train ride. Instead they discussed the Dark Lord, their parents, the war, and how to avoid becoming Death Eaters while at the same time keeping their inheritance and their lives.

They decided it would be impossible.

The train ride went by faster than Draco had expected, and not once had they run into the insufferable Golden Trio, for which the blonde Slytherin was eternally grateful. Draco and his four cronies (two friends and two goons) got off the train and climbed into a carriage. The door was shut and latched before Draco, being ever observant, noticed what non-crony was sitting across from him, between Crabbe and Goyle, who were cracking their knuckles threateningly.

Harry Potter.

Harry BLOODY Potter.

Potter spoke. "Why did you have to choose my carriage?"

Immediately his antagonism soared. "Your name's not on it," he growled. "Why aren't you with the Weasel and the Mudblood?"

Potter smirked. (Draco didn't know he could do that effectively.) "They're off shagging in another carriage."

Draco dry-heaved, partially reflexively, partially for effect. "Oh, gross, Potter! Why'd you go and tell me that!"

"You asked."

"Since when do you answer everything I ask you?"

"Since I knew the answer would bug you."

Draco, surprisingly, didn't have a comeback, but he was spared that embarrassment by one that was easily worse: Pansy had started humming The Song.

She hummed the first two lines alone, causing complete silence from everyone else, but Blaise joined her on the third line with a smirk, and Crabbe and Goyle joined in on the fifth. They got through the first two verses, Potter giving them all weird looks, before Draco freaked out.

"Would you SHUT! The HELL! UP!" He knew he was beet red, but he could have sworn that they were about to sing the rest of it, instead of just hum, and it would surely have killed him if Potter had figured out what it meant. He was quite certain that Potter was familiar with the song, being a goody goody Muggle-lover and a Gryffindork to boot.

His tormentors did as he asked, though not without a handful of mirthful chuckles and evil smirks. Once he was quite sure they would not start up again, he threw his attention to the floor, trembling in his rage. Being sandwiched between Pansy and Blaise, his views to the windows were mostly obscured, and it was easier on his neck to look at the floor instead of the ceiling. And no, he was not about to stare at Potter.

He was just overcoming the trembling in his body when a lone voice picked up the humming where it had been left off.

Simultaneously, all five Slytherins turned to stare at the obviously suicidal Gryffindor in their midst, four with expressions of utter amusement adorning their faces, as Potter unwittingly hummed a challenge at Draco.

At the end of only one verse, Draco's cronies were chuckling cautiously (and obviously holding back all they could), and Draco warned, "I wouldn't do that if I were you, Potter. You have no idea what you're getting yourself into."

Potter lifted his chin defiantly, obviously taking that as a threat of bodily harm. "I'm not afraid of you."

Draco took his comment at face value. His tormentors, however, took it as an invitation. Crabbe and Goyle (and Draco would never understand how they were able to think simultaneously, quickly, and independently enough to do this) crabbed Potter by the arms and held him back against the seat. Pansy used a binding spell to stop him from attacking them, and Blaise removed his glasses and covered his eyes as he said, "Come on, Draco, now's your chance!" Pansy, Crabbe, and Goyle voiced their agreement.

But Potter struggled, probably thinking that they intended to bring him to the Dark Lord. Though, he probably would have reacted just as vigorously – if not more – if he knew what they were really doing.

One of his goons – Crabbe or Goyle, he wasn't paying attention to them just then – asked, "Are you going to back down from his challenge, Malfoy?"

"A Malfoy never backs down from a challenge," his automatic response was. How many times had his father told him that? He blushed.

"Then do it."

So he did.

He stood in the carriage, leaned over Potter's bound and blinded form and kissed him on the lips, shocking the other teen so much that he was able to maneuver his tongue into the Gryffindor's mouth.

He chased his elusive tongue around the hot cavity with his own, and when his temporary prisoner relaxed a little, he found himself straddling Potter's lap and playing a very intense game of tonsil quidditch.

This time, his cronies sang the song, uninterrupted, while Draco was doing what it insisted.