Retribution
Note: This story contains
semi-graphic imagery and religious references that may be inappropriate for
some readers.
Lightning pierced the black velvet sky,
bathing the slumbering city in a brief flash of white light. The thunder that
immediately followed shook the ground beneath her feet. Instinctively, she
clamped her hands over her ears and quickened her pace. She was long past her
curfew and she needed to get home before the downpour.
Pulling her coat around her, she
hurried through the darkness.
***
It had been a while since he had
been to this place—this place that he had called home for three years, this
place where he had been imprisoned, then set free, then imprisoned again. It
was strangely exhilarating being back.
He stood in the shadows, watching.
Looking. Studying. Preparing for the long road that lay ahead of him. The road
that had led him here. The road that would lead him to his ultimate goal—his
final triumph.
There was so much to do. He had waited
patiently and had planned meticulously for his time. And it would begin
tonight.
***
Riley Finn was not happy. He hated
the rain. And now he was forced to sit in it. Pulling his olive drab, standard
issue poncho over his head, he sank further into his crouching position. He was
sweating underneath the heavy plastic rain gear and he grunted impatiently at
the futility of the entire situation.
He could be home right now—dry and
warm. But no. He was stuck here, in the downpour, searching for hostiles that
had enough sense to stay out of the rain.
"Anything?" he asked,
annoyed.
Graham shrugged next to him.
"Negative, sir. All quadrants are clear."
Riley gripped his taser tightly in
his fist, shielding it under his poncho. Weapons that shoot a blast of
electricity do not mix well with rain. He was reminded briefly about the
warning labels on hair dryers—"Do not use in the bathtub." He mumbled something under his breath.
"What was that, sir?"
Graham asked from beside him.
"I said," Riley
enunciated, "that these damn things are useless in the rain." He
motioned to the taser.
Graham nodded his head.
"Permission to speak frankly, sir."
Riley looked at his comrade more
harshly than intended. "Just say what's on your mind, Graham. You don't
need permission."
Pausing momentarily before
speaking, Graham nodded slightly. "Well, in my opinion," he said
loudly, trying to be heard over the rain pounding in his ears, "this whole
night is worthless. We are accomplishing absolutely nothing."
Nodding slowly in agreement, Riley
replied, "You're absolutely right, Graham. Let's get out of here."
The two commandos stood up and
headed back to base.
***
The two girls had long since called
it a night. The moment the first raindrop hit their skin, they headed back to
the dorm. They were now sitting on the floor next to each other, watching a
movie.
"See," Willow replied,
munching happily on some popcorn and nudging Buffy in the arm. "This is
much more fun than catching pneumonia. Don't you think?"
Buffy smiled. "It is
that," she said absently.
"Uh-oh. What is it?"
Willow's eyes scanned Buffy's face and noted the faraway look.
"What?" Buffy asked,
noticing Willow's scrutinizing gaze. "Oh. Nothing."
She looked again at the t.v. screen.
Willow studied her a moment longer,
uneasiness rising in her chest. Because she knew that when Buffy said
"nothing" she really meant "something".
And it was always something big.
***
The rain and the tears worked
together to make her vision almost nil. She stumbled through the rainy night,
her breath burning in her chest. The faster she ran, the easier it seemed for
him to keep up with her.
He had come out of nowhere. It had
just started to rain and she had begun to jog. She had turned a corner and
bumped into him.
"Excuse me," she had said
hastily, looking apologetically up into his face.
The lightning flashed again and
that's when she saw it. His face. It was grotesquely disfigured. And the eyes.
There was no soul behind them.
And she had begun to run, terror
gripping her and twisting her insides.
Even now, at full speed, the rain
and her ragged breaths loud in her ears, she could hear him behind her, his
heavy steps splashing in the puddles. She stumbled over a root, falling to her
knees, her fingers digging into the wet sod beneath her. Panic and adrenaline
forced her up, pushing her to run blindly into the driving rain, to seek the
nearest refuge.
She ran past the spot recently
vacated by two rain-soaked soldiers, the twigs on the bushes snagging on her
jeans and cutting into her arms. She kept looking over her shoulder and not
seeing him. But she heard him, felt him—the incessant, steady treading of his
feet.
Her gaze fell upon the nearest
shelter—a church. She pushed
frantically at the heavy wooden door, forcing all her weight against it. It
finally gave way and allowed her enough space to squeeze through. She closed it
quickly, her back pressed so tightly against it that she could feel the grain
cutting into her skin.
She ran to the altar and fell to
her knees, gazing up at the image of the Savior, looking pleadingly at it. Her
fingers were clasped tightly together, the knuckles showing white in the
candlelight.
She needed to pray, but the words
wouldn't come. They caught in her throat. Swallowing hard, she bowed her head,
willing the words to her lips. They finally came, abruptly—the only prayer she
could remember.
"Our Father," she gasped,
"Who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name..."
The words flowed from her soul
rapidly, breathlessly, falling from her lips and dissipating into the stale air
of the empty church.
"But deliver us from
evil."
Those words pounded in her ears and
hung in the air in front of her, suddenly so meaningful. She looked up at the
likeness of Jesus, searching for comprehension, for protection.
She repeated the words,
"Deliver us from evil..." and closed her eyes again.
***
And so it had begun—his plan had
been put into motion. He sat by the fire, his hair and clothes long since dry.
Familiar surroundings, abandoned long ago, wrapped around him warmly.
He let the memories come. One by
one, they danced across his consciousness and he closed his eyes. There was so
much to make up for and so much time had already been wasted. But no matter.
Time was something he had plenty of.
Shedding his clothes, he padded
smoothly to the bed. The sheets felt soft against his cool skin and as he sunk
his head further into the feather pillow, he could faintly smell the scent of
mildew. He hadn't slept on these sheets in months and the cool, damp air had
taken its toll. But these were details.
Stretching his lanky frame
luxuriously, he smiled. Tomorrow, he would go out again.
***
Reluctantly, he opened his eyelids.
The glare of the morning sun hurt his eyes.
"Wake up, Riley."
Squinting, Riley looked annoyingly
up at the intruder. "Forrest," he croaked, his voice thick with
sleep. "What is it?"
Forrest reached down and
unceremoniously pulled off the blankets, briefly thanking his lucky stars that
his friend did not sleep in the buff. "Dead girl. Came over the wire a few
minutes ago."
Riley rubbed his eyes roughly and
sat up. "Where?" he asked, looking intently at Forrest.
"St. Peter's Church."
Riley's eyes widened. "St.
Peter's? That's my church," he said absently.
"Good," Forrest replied,
tugging on Riley's arm. "We won't get lost on the way there, then."
***
Her uneasiness continued to plague her in
her sleep. She tossed and turned all night, strange dreams adding to her
growing discomfort. From what she could recall, it wasn't what she *saw* in her
dreams that disturbed her, it was what she *felt*. A strong sense of dread
weighed heavily on her mind.
This same feeling still filled her
when she opened her eyes, awakened by the phone. She sat up and reached for the
receiver.
"Hello?"
"Buffy. I'm sorry to wake
you." Giles' crisp voice sounded from the other end.
She sat up straighter, the tiny
hairs on the back of her neck standing up. There was only one reason why Giles ever called her this early—something
was wrong.
"What is it, Giles?" she
asked quickly, swallowing down the lump that had begun to form in her throat.
Giles took a deep breath. "A
girl was killed last night. She was found this
morning."
"Yeah. And?" Buffy
inquired, at the risk of sounding callous. People were killed every day. It
rarely involved her. There was something Giles was not telling her, something
he was reluctant for her to know.
"And," Giles answered
slowly, pushing his breath out through his teeth, "there's something
else."
Buffy held her breath.
***
Her body lay on the altar, under
the painting of Jesus. Her hands were folded neatly on her chest, her legs
straight ahead of her. It was obvious she had been positioned that way. Whoever
killed her was sending a message.
From a distance, it looked as
though she had taken shelter from the storm and had fallen asleep. But a closer
inspection told a different tale. Three strange markings marred her otherwise
peaceful countenance.
Two were tiny holes on the right
side of her neck, which, to the two soldiers at the scene, told them exactly
*what* they were dealing with. But the third marking puzzled them. It told them
*who* they were dealing with, even though they didn't realize it.
On her left cheek, a small but
distinctive symbol was carved into her skin.
It was a cross.
***
He was pacing. Pent-up energy hummed
beneath his skin and he smiled impatiently to himself.
Sleep had come and gone and he
could feel that it must already be early morning. He was tempted to pull back
the curtain to take a peek, but thought better of it. He may feel invincible,
but there were things beyond his control that could destroy him. Sometimes he
resented these limitations on his existence. But only briefly. For the
possibilities of it were endless.
He looked at the clock. 12:07 it
read. Of course, it hadn't been wound since he had last resided there. He
walked over to it and brushed off the dust with his fingers. Time; it passed so
slowly sometimes. He carefully picked it up, wound it—knowing that the time was
incorrect—and set it down again, content to hear the rhythm of the ticking. The
sound was a tangible way to observe the passage of time, especially in a place
that knew no change in light patterns.
Turning from the clock, he strode
across the room smoothly and back again, repeating the cycle for a long while.
His mind worked better when he was on his feet. And he must think.
Last night had been just the
beginning. There was much more to be done.
But all he could do for now was
wait.
***
Professor Walsh was lecturing, but Riley
wasn't listening. He couldn't. His mind was occupied with thoughts of earlier
that morning. The girl. She had been laid out as if she was some sort of
sacrifice. But a sacrifice to whom or what he didn't know.
The whole thing disturbed him. He
had never seen anything like it before. Vampires killed, yes, but never with
such cold calculation. In his experience, they just fed and fled. They didn't
stop to make a statement. But this one had. Not only did he kill, but he did so
inside a church in the presence of God. And marked his victim with the cross.
The total disregard for all Riley found sacred angered him. But it also
frightened him.
For if this demon no longer feared
God, what did he fear?
***
A ritual killing. That's what the news
said it was. The victim, drained of blood, was laid out on the altar of a
church. Neither she nor Giles knew about the cross—the police had not released
that tidbit of information to the public. So when Giles had heard the story on
the news, he did not hear about the marking.
Buffy sat watching Professor Walsh, but
not paying attention. What was supposed to be her notes was nothing more than a
page full of doodles. She couldn't shake the uneasiness that had been weighing
on her since last night.
There was something about this
murder that ate at her. Both she and Giles were sure that the culprit was a
vampire. The only surprise was the location. A church--the one place that
represents all that vampires fear—was the place where a vampire had left its
victim.
There was a message there. But what
was it?
***
Sunnydale was in danger. Well, more than
usual. Its newest resident was one to be reckoned with. He was stealthy and
clever and most of all brutal. He wouldn't hesitate to use its population for
his own personal game. And unknown to them, he had already begun.
***
He crouched behind the bushes, his eyes
and ears open, his mind working. He had been unable to get the picture of that
young girl's face out of his mind. All
day, it would flash in front of his eyes and present itself in the darkness
behind his eyelids. And as he sat in the shadows, staring ahead of him, he
could see her face, the cross carved in her cheek.
A small shiver began at the base of
his spine and grew in intensity as it traveled to his neck. He took a deep
breath and closed his eyes briefly, trying to push back the graphic images
haunting his consciousness. His focus was waning; the longer he sat in the
darkness in search of a killer, the more distracted he became.
Suddenly needing air and in an
attempt to calm his racing heart, he stood up, surveying the area again.
Nothing. He felt a hand tug urgently on his cammo pants.
"Finn! What the hell are you
doing?"
Riley looked blankly at the source
of the voice. Forrest's eyes were wide open, looking intently into his.
"What?" he asked absently.
"Get down, man!" Forrest
yanked on Riley's arm roughly, dragging him back to the ground. "What the
hell's the matter with you, anyway?"
Riley just stared at him, blinking.
Forrest's words seemed to be coming from miles away and it took a while for him
to comprehend them. He shook his head to clear it and focused on his friend's
face. "Nothing," he finally answered. "I'm fine."
Forrest just looked at him doubtfully.
***
Buffy strolled along the perimeter of the
park, her eyes scanning every shadow, her ears scrutinizing every sound.
She was alone. She didn't want to
take the chance that Willow or anyone else might get hurt. Which was a distinct
possibility and even more likely with a crazed killer on the loose.
No, Buffy had to find this vamp and
kill him. Before he killed again. Which, of course, was easier said than done.
There was something about this
particular vampire that disturbed her. It was a feeling she had been unable to
shake since Giles had phoned. Of course, seeing the girl's face on t.v. hadn't
really helped much. The wide smile, the sparkling eyes that she had in life
were now gone forever. Buffy couldn't help but wonder if she had ever met
her—maybe in the bookstore or the student union. Perhaps she had bumped into
her on the street and never realized who she was.
Someone's daughter, someone's
sister, someone's friend, perhaps someone's girlfriend—this young woman had been all of these things. And now all
she was was an innocent pawn in a sick game.
Buffy thought of all these things
as she patrolled. She herself was most of these things—daughter, friend, and at
one time, girlfriend. In many ways she was just like this girl. And that
frightened her. But she had one thing in her favor—she could sense the bad guys
before they could sense her.
Which she did now. She slowed her
pace and tilted her head, the hairs on her arms standing up. He was close, but
as she studied the darkness around her, she couldn't see him. And she couldn't
pinpoint his location. He was moving—staying close, but circling her slowly,
very slowly. Toying with her.
She could feel every muscle in her
body tense, could almost hear the sound his body made as he moved through the
air. She pulled the stake from her belt loop and grasped it tightly in her
fist, holding it at the ready.
But he was gone.
***
There she was—the Slayer. He stood in the
shadows, studying her. She stopped and looked around. She could feel him.
He smiled contentedly to himself as
he began to walk in slow, easy circles, watching as she tried to locate him. He
could see her tense up, could hear her shallow breaths, could smell her concentration.
He continued his achingly slow
dance with her--the object of his obsession—for a few more moments, watching
the thin lines crease her smooth forehead and the anger mix with the sadness in
her eyes.
She was a fighter with the face of
a child.
And he was a demon with the face of
an angel.
***
"Early this morning, the body
of 20-year-old Sharon McCormick was found near the UC Sunnydale campus.
Investigators say they are following all leads and made no comment as to
whether or not this murder is in any way connected to that of 18-year-old
Christa Matthews, whose body was found in St. Peter's Church yesterday
morning..."
***
The memorial service had been opened up
to the public. The pews were full and people were lining the walls, silently
paying their respects.
Christa Matthews' parents opted not
to have an open casket. To see her face and the trademark of her killer would
just cause unnecessary pain. It was hard enough being without her.
The people of Sunnydale, no
strangers to the untimely loss of its citizens, showed their support. Flowers
from people all over the city filled the area around the casket. Students,
people who shared a class and shared a way of life with Christa, silently
mourned and struggled with internal questions. Why her? What had she done to
deserve this?
But Riley didn't ask those
questions. He knew it was futile to ask questions that had no answers. He stood
in the back of the church, a small but quaint building that smelled faintly of
incense. He stared at the casket—the one that held the body of a girl who died
before her time.
The sunlight streaming through the
stained-glass window painted the front of the church in a myriad of colors and
Riley found himself wondering about the girl Christa had been. Had she been shy
or outgoing? Friendly or aloof? He allowed himself to imagine that her smile
lit up a room and her laugh filled people's hearts with music. She had dreams
and aspirations, plans and potential. And now that was gone; it was over.
It was only when he closed his eyes
and felt the warm tears roll down his face that he realized he was crying. And
he couldn't understand why. He hadn't
talked to her or laughed with her. And yet he cried for her.
He crossed himself quickly,
swallowing his tears and ignoring the dull ache in his chest. He couldn't stay
here.
Quietly, he slipped out the door.
***
"It had to be him, Giles. He
was close, but I couldn't see him. And then he was gone. He was trying to mess
with my head," Buffy said resolutely, Giles didn't reply. He took off his
glasses, rubbed his eyes, and replaced the spectacles on his nose. Sighing, he
stood up. "It pains me to say this, Buffy, but I just don't know. I have
researched since yesterday morning and have found nothing. There have been only
a handful of instances where a
vampire actually left his victim in a church. And their own deaths are all in
the records." He took a breath. "And besides, the church doesn't seem
to be a common denominator. The latest victim was found outside..." His
voice trailed off, his last words lingering in the air.
"I've got to find him,"
Buffy replied, as much to herself as to Giles. "My failure means more
people will die..." She shuddered at the thought.
***
The clock over the fireplace, now proudly
showing the right time, was a pleasant reminder that dusk was fast approaching.
He sat in a chair, his legs stretched out in front of him, fingers entwined
loosely across his stomach.
He was pleased with himself.
Everything was falling into place. He had planted the seed in her mind; now all
he had to do was sow it.
That would be the fun part.
He closed his eyes and brought his
hand to his nose, inhaling deeply. Her scent filled his nostrils and he felt
his body relax. He had found her scarf last night when he returned to the
mansion. It was wrapped around his hand now, a keepsake and an inspiration.
At the time she had left it there,
things were different. He was different. But now, things were as they should have always been. And the
scarf only served as a reminder of everything he had come back for, everything
for which he sought retribution.
He rubbed the soft fabric between
his fingers and waited for nightfall.
***
The people of Sunnydale had already begun
to form their own conclusions. Two murders, two nights. Both victims—young
female college students.
A killer had taken up residence in
their quiet city. And he left no evidence—no fingerprints, no clues, not a
trace.
Every person was looked at with
caution, every man with suspicion.
But the culprit was nowhere among
these day-dwellers. His domain was the darkness; the night was his time.
While Sunnydale slept, he preyed.
***
The debriefing was over and everyone had gone their separate
ways. Except Riley. He continued to sit. His eyes were focused in front of him,
the objects of his gaze in the center of his vision. Their faces stared back at
him, burning into his memory.
Walsh had granted him personal time in the morning, which he had
used to attend Christa's memorial service. But when he returned, he discovered
that hers wasn't the only service that would need attending.
The face of Sharon McCormick smiled
back at him from the bulletin board in front of him. Christa Matthews did the
same, though her smile was a little weaker, a little shyer. Two young faces, so
beautiful. And Riley tried hard not to let his eyes fall upon the crime scene
photos below the portraits. That's not
how he wanted to remember them—marked and lifeless. He wanted to see them as
they were, how they should be. How they looked as angels, after their pain and
suffering were over.
That's how Riley imagined them—as
angels. It was a somewhat childish notion, he knew. But he needed to believe
that. He couldn't accept that they had died for nothing, that they had been
marked with the symbol of Christ and then had been left behind.
He brought a trembling hand to his
eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, then drew the hand slowly through his
hair. The deep breath he took was ragged and caught in his throat.
He closed his eyes. Come on, Finn.
Get a grip.
***
She was alone again. Which was the
whole point. She was trying to draw him out. She—a seemingly helpless coed,
alone in the darkness. He—a ruthless
vampire looking for his latest victim.
Stepping into the center of the
park, the darkest part, she peered into the shadows. There was nothing to see.
But more importantly, there was nothing to sense. And even though the purpose
of this little expedition was to find the killer, she couldn't help but feel
relief that she hadn't. At least not yet.
She continued through the bushes,
walking slowly, listening and looking. She had almost gotten all the way
through the foliage when she caught her foot on something heavy. She looked
down distractedly, but in the dim light she could barely make out anything. She
nudged her foot forward, but it wouldn't budge. The breeze blew back the
branches briefly, allowing in enough light for her to see what she was caught
on.
She gasped.
***
She had gotten his surprise. He knew she
would. He knew how she thought, where she patrolled. And it was time to up the
stakes, so to speak. So he had left her a little memento.
He watched, grinning slightly, as
her expression changed from one of bewilderment to one of realization. The
horror etched in her features was clear to him even in the shadows. He took a
step closer, boldly stepping into the soft glow of the lamp.
She was distracted and didn't feel
him there. He was free to observe her as she kneeled down and extended a
shaking hand to the girl's neck, checking for a pulse. Saw her close her eyes
in comprehension and bow her head briefly, then look back up and brush her
fingers lightly over the tiny punctures on the side of the girl's neck.
He stood still, taking it all in,
relishing the reaction he saw in her eyes and the smell he detected emanating
from her—a mixture of fear, anger, and something new. Guilt. She felt guilty
for this girl's death. And he was pleased.
But the pinnacle of the evening's
festivities came a moment later—at the discovery of the trademark carving on
the girl's cheek. His eyes sparkled mischievously as he watched her mouth work
with silent sounds, watched her eyes widen. He could hear her breath become
ragged and could almost see the fear emanating from her skin.
"Until we meet again,
lover," he whispered. He smiled and disappeared into the shadows.
Buffy looked up quickly, but found
nothing but light and shadow.
***
He had kicked off the covers hours ago.
His eyes moved rapidly behind his closed eyelids and his head rolled back and
forth against the sweat dampened pillow.
Images flashed across his mind and
invaded his dreams. Laughter and screams, tears of joy and tears of pain.
Opposing images crowded his subconscious. But one thing remained
constant--their faces. Their expressions right before their deaths. Their eyes
as they looked to him for help and he wasn't there.
His eyes flew open and he sat up,
panting. Sweat trickled down his brow. He looked around the dark room,
frantically searching for something to chase the ghosts away. But all he found
was emptiness.
Quickly, he stood up and stretched
his trembling limbs, running his hands over his face and through his damp hair.
He had to get out of there—the walls were slowly closing in. And he could swear
he heard voices—more than one, superimposed on each other—echoing from the
shadows.
He slipped on his shoes, pulled a
shirt over his head, and headed out the door.
***
She had waited for the police,
answered their questions, sat through the lecture about being out alone at
night, and had finally been allowed to go. They had wanted to escort her home, but she insisted on going alone. Her
dorm was very nearby and she needed some air, she'd told them. They had
reluctantly let her go.
She was still shaken up from her
discovery, but moreso from the feeling that she had been meant to find the
girl. She couldn't shake the nagging suspicion that the killer had been there
watching her the whole time. And she had missed it.
The cross. The marking on the
girl's cheek had shocked her. It was the last thing she expected to find on the
victim of a vampire. But there it had been—distinct and unmistakable. She had
to tell Giles about it, see what he could find out.
She also couldn't shake the feeling
that she should already know who it was. But she couldn't put her finger on it. And it ate at her.
Her heart was heavy as she turned
towards Stevenson.
***
He handed the clerk a dollar and leaned
against the counter, scanning the front page of the last copy of the evening
edition of the Sunnydale Tribune. The headline "Vampire Killer Claims
Second Victim" screamed at him in large black letters from the top of the
page.
He stifled a smile as the clerk
opened the drawer to make change and said, "It's pretty creepy isn't it?
Both victims drained of blood. Seems Sunnydale has its very own
Dracula-wannabe. Do you believe in vampires?"
He looked over his shoulder and
eyed the young clerk closely, his eyes twinkling with amusement. He smiled
slightly. "Nah," he said softly. "There's no such thing as vampires." He looked at the young
man's outstretched hand, the one that held his change. He waved it off.
"Keep it," he said.
And he gave the clerk one last
smile before leaving the store, chuckling softly to himself.
***
He didn't know why he had come here.
Except that he felt compelled to. That was all. He had stepped out of Lowell
and into the night, allowing his feet to carry him here.
He stood now, in the back of St.
Peter's Church, gazing through the candlelight at the altar. The same altar
where Christa's body had been found. He walked up the center aisle slowly, his
pulse quickening with each step.
When he reached the front, he
stopped. He looked into the eyes of the Savior, anger suddenly rising in his
throat. Why? his eyes were asking, imploring Him. How could you let this
happen?
His faith; it had never failed him.
And now, when he needed it the most, it was slipping through his fingers. He
clenched his hands into fists, subconsciously trying to maintain his grip on
all that he believed.
He looked down towards the altar,
no longer able to keep his eyes fixed on the face of Christ. But all he could
see was her--her face, so peaceful yet scarred, her blonde hair cascading down
the steps, shining golden in the rays of the early morning sunlight.
And he started to shake, bitter
tears falling down his face, feelings of emptiness and despair filling his
soul. He needed something to hold on to, but when he reached out, nothing was
there.
"What can I do for you,
son?"
Riley jerked his head around to
face the source of the soft-spoken words.
A priest with a kind face stepped
into the dim light, his eyes full of concern. And hope.
Riley grasped onto the hope he
found in the clergyman's eyes, holding on to it for dear life.
"Help me, Father..." he
whispered.
***
She had long since returned to Stevenson
and had talked to Giles. He said he would look into it immediately. She had yet
to hear from him.
Willow had asked very few
questions, for which Buffy was grateful. Buffy looked over at her sleeping
friend now, envious of her ability to put her cares away for a few hours.
But Buffy couldn't. She was
watching. And waiting. And hoping that Giles would find something, anything
that would shed some light on what she couldn't put her finger on. Never had a
vampire outsmarted her or gotten the upper hand. They were never that smart—not
even Spike.
A thought crept into her mind.
Small at first but gradually growing in size, it began in the back of her
consciousness and slowly pushed its way to the forefront.
And she started to
tremble—violently and uncontrollably. There *was* someone who had always had
the ability to get under her skin. Someone who always took pleasure in toying
with her.
But it couldn't be him. It just
couldn't.
The phone rang, pulling her from
her panic. She reached for it blindly, grasping it tightly in her fingers.
Pressing it to her ear, she whispered hoarsely, "Hello?" Her voice
didn't sound like her own.
There was a pause on the other end.
Then Giles' voice sounded softly and gravely from the other end. "Buffy,
I..."
But Buffy cut him off. "I
know," she said, her voice trembling. "Angelus..."
***
He looked at his growing shrine. He
had never done anything like that before—collected articles pertaining to his
work. But this time, it felt like the right thing to do. He wanted her to see
them when she came here, to have them remind her of her failure. And she would
come; he was sure of that.
***
The morning edition of the Tribune
hit newsstands just as the earliest commuters hit the streets. They perused the
front page as they drank their coffee, the report of "Third 'Vampire' Victim
Found in Park" greeting them as they ate their bagels.
By midday, every drugstore and
beauty salon in town had a run on dark hair coloring. The victims were all
young and blonde. And every blonde woman in the city was in a hurry to make
herself look as different from them as possible.
Sunnydale was under siege. And for
the first time, the people took notice.
***
He had stayed up all night with Father
O'Brien—talking, praying, crying. Trying to recapture the strength of faith that he was slowly
losing. He didn't leave the church
until the faintest rays of sunlight shone through the windows.
On his way back home, he felt
better. More sure of himself and his
beliefs than he had been a few hours before. And even though he was fatigued, he felt relaxed and more
refreshed. Things started to make sense
again.
The old priest had told him that God was
still there, that He always had been and always would be. And that everything happened for a reason. Those girls' deaths—they were tragic,
yes. But they were meant to be. They were with God now, where they
belonged. There would be no more pain,
no more suffering for them.
Riley had listened to his words, had let
them sink in, and had allowed them to soothe him. He felt the warm hand touch his shoulder and heard the even tones
of the priest's voice as he recited the scripture. "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want..."
The priest's words surrounded him, filled
him, shed light on his darkened soul. "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I
will fear no evil, for thou art with me..."
Riley had kneeled until his knees hurt,
had prayed until his voice was hoarse. It had been a long time since he had gotten so in touch with his
religion.
But one brief moment worked to destroy a
night's worth of work. When Riley
walked into Lowell, he was greeted with the news that yet another girl had been
murdered—Amanda Baxter, 19.
And suddenly Riley forgot the serenity he
had found, as guilt replaced the peace of mind he had worked so hard to
regain. Guilt because while he was
spending the evening selfishly tending to his spiritual needs, another girl's
life was being stolen.
He should have been out looking for her
killer.
And instead, he had let her die.
***
Buffy's conscience was bothering
her. Ever since her realization that
Angelus had returned, she had been unable to think of anything else. She wondered what had happened. The last time she had seen Angel, he had
been fine. What had gone wrong?
But none of that really mattered now, did
it? All that mattered was that Angelus
was back. And he was back because of
her. Those girls were dead because of
her.
Willow awakened to find Buffy sitting on
her bed, her eyes wide, her body rocking slowly back and forth. She got up and sat next to her best friend,
reaching a hand out apprehensively to touch her shoulder. Buffy's eyes looked towards her, but didn't
focus. The tears rimmed her green eyes,
lingering there, threatening to fall at any moment. Buffy held her hand out, opening it slowly and revealing what she
had been gripping tightly for hours. The claddagh rested on her palm, its design pressed into her skin.
Willow eyed her friend closely. Angel had been gone for months now and she
thought Buffy was finally starting to let go.
"Oh Buffy..."
***
The anticipation was almost too much to
bear. He was pacing again, his
footsteps resounding loudly through the spacious mansion.
His next move would be a definitive
one. No more cat-and-mouse. They would finally meet face-to-face.
And then the real fun would begin.
***
Class was unbearable. But he had to keep up appearances, go
through the motions. He couldn't let
the world see that he was falling apart. So he sat at his desk at the side of the classroom and busied himself
with looking busy.
Every now and then he looked up and
surveyed the faces in front of him. All
of them young, all of them accusing. Amanda Baxter—she had been in this class. He had graded her papers, had spoken with her during office
hours. And now she was gone.
He looked at each empty seat and wondered
if it had at one time been occupied by Amanda. Was the girl next to that empty seat a friend of hers? Did she have any friends?
Then his eyes fell upon something that
made his blood run cold. Another empty
seat. Only this one was next to Willow
Rosenberg. Buffy Summers' friend. Buffy Summers—the girl that he would spend
the fifty minutes of class daydreaming about. It used to be that all he could think about was her lovely smile. But at that moment, all he could see was her
face—carved up and bloodless.
His heart pounded in his ears as he
stared at the empty chair, letting his imagination and the reality of what he'd
seen in the last three days carry him away. And suddenly the world went to spinning. He couldn't breathe and all he wanted to do was run.
So he did.
He pushed away from his desk and stood
up, letting his chair fall to the floor behind him. And he fled quickly, ignoring the stares that followed after him.
***
She had spent the day hiding—from the
world, from herself. Although the
latter had proven difficult. Willow had
wanted to stay with her, but Buffy had insisted she go. She needed to be alone. And in her solitude, there was nothing to
keep her company but her thoughts.
She realized now that she had never
gotten over her fear of Angelus. Nor
had she completely moved past her love for Angel. And the first time around, the love of one had prevented the
killing of the other. Because she
couldn't separate the two. Here was this
demon who tormented her and her friends and did so with a song in his
heart. But he had the face, the voice,
the body of her beloved. And that was
all she could see.
Now, as she patrolled—not really
patrolled, but waited--she fought to find the courage to face him that she had
struggled to find all that time ago. But her search was interrupted by a sense of dread in the pit of her
stomach.
And a voice.
"Hello, lover."
***
"I'm fine." He was insistent. Walsh, Forrest, even Graham had all questioned his mental state. And it angered him to know that the
self-control he was so proud of was cracking. And that it was that obvious.
"I'm fine," he said again,
though no one had said a word to the contrary. It was more of a declaration to himself than anything.
Walsh studied him closely, looking into
his eyes and searching for what she hoped to find. Riley shifted uncomfortably under her scrutinizing gaze, but
maintained eye contact. He set his jaw
determinedly. Seemingly satisfied that
what she found behind his eyes was the eye of the storm, she sighed and backed
away.
"Very well," she said
slowly. She gave him one last
look-over. "You may go. But be careful, Riley. We need you."
He nodded silently and deliberately, then
turned and walked away. Walsh shared a
knowing look with Forrest and Graham before dismissing them.
***
She had heard those words before—years
ago, though at that moment it felt like yesterday. She looked up into the eyes that so many times she had gotten
lost in. But they were darker, more
menacing. And they bore into hers,
stealing her breath.
"Miss me?" he said, taking a step closer. "'Cause I sure have missed you..."
Buffy swallowed the fear that she tried
hard to control. She spoke her first
words of the night. "A-Angel...Angelus..." she whispered.
He smiled. "It's nice to know that you haven't forgotten me,
lover. I would really be hurt if you
had..."
The smile, the face. His face—Angel's face. The one that she had dreamed about since she
watched him walk away that smoky night a few months ago. Here it was again, right in front of
her. The face of her beloved on a
cold-blooded killer.
"Why?" she managed, unable to tear
her eyes away.
He took another step closer. "I needed some amusement. And you have always amused me..." His voice was soft and his low, even tones
lulled her senses.
His fingers brushed her cheek as he
pushed her hair away and they danced lightly across the tangled scar on her
neck. "I see you still wear my
mark," he said. Then he smiled
again, his dark eyes twinkling with delight. "What a night that was...The way you gave yourself to me for the
second time..." His thumb brushed
across the sensitive area again and he felt her shiver.
He chuckled softly. "You like that, don't you?" He was enjoying the reaction his touch
elicited in her. "You're a part of
me, lover. Your blood flows through my
veins."
"That was for Angel, not
you." Her voice was nothing more
than a whisper.
He leaned in closer, his mouth inches
from her ear. "You still don't get
it, do you? He and I...we're one and
the same. He always had that desire,
that hunger to kill. He chose to ignore
it, but it was always there. I, on the
other hand, choose to give into those desires."
She felt his breath on her skin, warm
despite the coolness of his body. And
she shuddered. "I won't let you
hurt anyone else," she stated weakly, in an attempt to regain her
composure. His nearness was clouding
her mind.
He pulled back, a small grin pulling at
the corners of his mouth. "How
noble of you. Sticking up for the
underdog. Champion of the people, is
that it?" He chuckled softly. "What are you going to do? Stop me?" He reached down and pulled the small wooden weapon from her belt
loop, hefting it lightly in his hands before holding it out to her. He eyed her closely. "Well, here's your chance. Go ahead."
Buffy stood in place, unable to
move. Her eyes went from his face, to
the weapon he offered her, and back to his face. His expression was solemn though his eyes were laughing at
her. She reached out and slowly gripped
the stake in her fingers, her eyes never leaving his.
He leaned in again, the point pressing
into his skin, above his heart. And he
whispered in her ear. "I love
you."
Those words pierced through the armor
around her heart and she began to shake. And suddenly all she could remember was a time long ago—another
lifetime, it seemed—when she had heard those same words, in that same
voice. Right before she shoved a sword
in his gut and sent him to Hell. She
had killed him then because she'd had to. And she had to now.
But she couldn't.
She squeezed her eyes shut and lowered
the stake to her side, letting it hang loosely from her fingers. And she heard him chuckle and felt his soft
lips brush across her neck, grazing the scar.
When she opened her eyes again, he was
gone.
***
He was there one moment and gone the
next. Graham had picked up the vampire on the scanner and the three commandos
had followed its trail. The vamp hadn't moved; it was just hovering there, very
close to a human.
They closed in on it, moving
quickly through the darkness. But they lost its trail right before they stepped
into the clearing. And when they got there, all they found was a young woman.
She was just standing there, staring blankly ahead of her.
Buffy. Riley recognized her in an
instant and could see that she was trembling. And without thinking, he went to
her, ignoring the protests of his partners. All that was driving him, the sole
source of power behind the movements of his limbs, was his need to protect her.
He walked up to her, tiny in the
faint moonlight. She didn't seem to notice he was there.
"Buffy..." he whispered,
his voice choked with relief that the visions he had had in class that day were
nothing more than figments of his imagination. She looked so fragile and...broken. That was it; she looked broken.
She looked at him, focusing on his
face for the first time that night. She studied his features as if she was
trying to remember where she had seen him before. And she started to sob.
Riley watched, motionless, as this
small, beautiful girl shook with sadness, as the weight of her pain dragged her
down. And suddenly he felt as though he understood.
He reached for, gently touching her
face with his fingertips.
She looked at him again, her wide
green eyes rimmed with tears. And she held out her hand, the one that still
held the stake. Her expression begged him to take it. Please, she was saying.
It hurts too much to hold it.
Riley looked at the object offered
to him in her outstretched hand. And he took it and asked no questions. The way
she was looking at him, the desperation etched in her face, was all he needed.
"It's okay," he whispered
to her. "It's okay."
But she didn't respond. She just
blinked and shook her head. Then she did something that took him by surprise.
She hugged him.
He felt her arms go around him,
felt her fingers grasp handfuls of his uniform, felt her move against him as
she cried into his chest.
And he let her cry. He circled his
arms around her and smoothed her hair, closing his eyelids against the flood
raging behind his own eyes.
***
Angelus watched as Buffy fell
apart. He stood a few yards behind the two remaining soldiers, observing the
scene between the two lost souls. She was destined to protect the world from
the likes of him. And there she was, bawling her eyes out.
He smiled to himself, pleased at the
weakness he was witnessing. She was the only one with the power to do battle
with him. And she was powerless.
He knew that this would be fun.
***
"What do you mean he's
gone?" Her voice was stern.
Forrest bolstered himself. "We
found Buffy Summers alone in the park. He went to her. Then he left with her. I
assume he took her home."
Walsh was furious. "You
assume? You didn't follow him or try to stop him?"
Graham interjected. "If you
had seen him, ma'am. His eyes...He was out of it."
"All the more reason to bring
him back here, Agent Miller." Walsh glared at him. "Agent Finn is
vital to this operation. We cannot lose him. And we definitely can't afford to
let him go galavanting off with pretty blonde coeds." She paused and took
a breath, calming her growing annoyance. She looked at the two soldiers
carefully. "You better hope that he returns soon, gentlemen. Because I'm
holding you personally responsible if he doesn't."
Forrest and Graham just nodded
silently.
***
She hadn't said a word since the
park. He had offered to take her home, but she had refused, shaking her head
silently and taking him by the hand. He had followed without argument.
They sat now in the basement of
what used to be Sunnydale High School, silently taking comfort in each other's
presence. Buffy sat with her back against a fallen beam, her knees drawn up to
her chest. And she stared ahead
of her, barely blinking.
Riley sat a few feet away,
observing her, absently playing with the stake in his hand. The stake she had
given to him. And he wondered about the story behind it. Why had she had it?
And what did she know? But most importantly, who was she?
None of it seemed to matter at that
moment. For he had plenty of questions of his own to answer. All that was
important was the beautiful, sad girl in front of him; that she was alright.
His heart was breaking just
watching her. But at the same time, he felt a sense of peace. Because she *was*
alright—at least she was alive—and that was more than he'd seen lately.
He wanted to help her. Perhaps she
would let him.
And maybe she could help him too.
***
Above them, the rest of the world
continued its routine of panic. Women who used to be blonde were now brunette
and they traveled together in groups of two or more. Escorts were provided free
of charge to women who had no choice but to walk home at night after work or
class. Buses offered extended service far into the night and the police were
more visible than they ever had been, patrolling every street corner and
darkened alley.
The majority of conversation
revolved around small talk—sports, stocks, the
weather—as a way to escape the harsh reality. Maybe if they didn't talk about
it, it would no longer be true. Except that when they turned on their
televisions and unfolded their newspapers, there it was.
There was no denying it.
***
The sunlight peeked in through the
cracks in the dirty windows high above their heads. Buffy stirred and opened
her eyes, becoming frantic when she didn't see Riley. She started to whimper.
Then she felt a hand on her arm.
She snapped her head around and found Riley's eyes staring into hers.
"Shh," he said
soothingly. "I'm here."
She relaxed and pushed herself up
into a sitting position. She covered his hand with hers and gave him a small
smile.
He returned the gesture, the first
real smile that had graced his face in days.
"Hungry?" he asked her
gently. "I got us some food while you were sleeping."
A look of panic flashed in her eyes
briefly at the realization that he had left her alone. But just as quickly as
it started, it ended. And she nodded her head fervently in response to his
question.
He had hated to leave her,
especially in her condition. She had finally fallen asleep around two o'clock.
And he had sat watching her, fighting off his own fatigue in order to be her
eyes and ears. And her voice, if need be.
She had been in the middle of a
nightmare when he'd returned, writhing and calling out in her sleep. He had
gone to her and knelt by her side, wanting to be there in case she reached out.
And he was only able to make out two words, which she kept repeating over and
over as tears squeezed out beneath her closed eyelids.
"Angel...no..."
But he couldn't watch anymore. He
wanted to ease her pain. So he pressed his palm lightly against her hot
forehead. And she calmed. She murmured softly at his touch and stopped
writhing. And gradually her breathing returned to its normal rhythm.
He had stayed by her for the rest
of the night, watching her sleep, calming her when the terrors behind her
eyelids were too much for her to bear. And when she woke up and realized that
she was not alone—the smile that curved her lips was priceless.
They sat in silence, eating their
makeshift breakfast. She—a bag of cheetos and a warm coke, he—a moonpie and a
bottle of YooHoo. He was leaning against the wall, one leg stretched out in
front of him, one leg bent, his arm resting on his knee, the bottle of
chocolate soda dangling from his hand. And he was watching her, continuing his vigil from the night before.
She ate voraciously, looking at him
periodically with gratitude in her eyes. Then she did something else that shocked him.
She burped.
The look in her eyes as they
widened was precious—a mixture of
embarrassment and amusement. And Riley
couldn't help but laugh. His eyes danced as he shook with laughter. Soon, Buffy
joined in and for the first time in hours, they weren't plagued by their
personal demons.
But it didn't last long. The sound
of Riley's radio broke their moment of levity.
"9-1-1. Please state your
emergency."
"Yes, I was just out walking
my dog and I came across...I found two girls...crosses on their cheeks...I
think they're dead..."
Riley moved quickly, nearly jumping
the few feet to where his radio was sitting on top of a pile of his gear. He
grabbed it and shut it off, staring at it as his fingers curled tightly around
it. He turned around when he heard something hit the ground.
Buffy had dropped her soda can and
was slowly inching backwards, curling up into a tight ball when she reached the
fallen beam. She was whispering something over and over again, almost
inaudibly, and Riley had to move closer to make out the words.
She was shaking her head, tears
falling unrestricted from her terrified eyes.
"I killed them...I killed
them...I killed them..."
Riley just watched helplessly,
silently kicking himself for leaving his radio on.
***
Again with the pacing. It was a
habit he'd acquired back in the old days. As long as his feet were moving, so was his mind. And his steps were in
time with the ticking of the clock, helping him mark time—each trip across the
room was 15 seconds, four trips was a minute, 240 trips an hour. Every step
brought him closer to the dusk.
The last two girls had been easy
and had made the statement he was hoping for—that her weakness led to their
deaths. He personally didn't care if any of the girls he'd killed lived or
died. It wasn't personal. But he knew that she would care and that was what was
important. That she knew and cared was everything. Her humanity would mean her
downfall.
He certainly knew how that felt.
She was terrified and
guilt-stricken and ready to break. He couldn't stop now; not when he was so
close to his goal. No, he must continue.
He stopped his steady pacing long
enough to gaze at the faces on his wall. They all looked the same to him, for she was all he could see.
Tonight, he would begin phase two
of his plan.
He would draw her out.
***
"Oh my God..." The words
rang through the still air of Giles' living room.
Willow stood up, suddenly unable to
sit still. Upon her request and the fact that Buffy had not returned home last
night, the Scoobies had gathered at Giles' house.
And the bomb that was Angelus had
just been dropped in their laps.
"Oh my God..." she said
again, starting, then stopping, then starting her pacing again.
"Now we can't be sure it's
him, Willow. There was another vampire in the records that marked his victims
with the cross—Penn. He was sired by
Angelus..." Giles didn't believe a word he was saying, but he said it
anyway.
Willow looked at him, wanting to
believe him, but not being able to. "If you had seen her, Giles,
you..."
But Xander interrupted her.
"Let's call Angel. If he answers, then we'll know it's not Angelus,
right?" His voice held the hope that his eyes lacked.
Giles closed his eyes briefly and
let out his breath. "I did," he stated solemnly.
"And?" Xander inquired
urgently.
"There was no answer..."
He let his voice taper off, his words lingering in the growing tension.
***
She had calmed enough to let him
near her. And he sat next to her, not touching her, but just close enough to
where he could feel her warmth.
He had asked her if there was
anyone she wanted him to call for her. She hadn't answered. He asked her
again—"What about Willow? I'm sure she's worried about you." Buffy had
looked up and paused, her eyes widening with recognition. But after a moment of
contemplation, she had simply shaken her head again. Riley had sighed and said,
"Okay." Buffy had nodded in appreciation of his understanding.
He wished she knew why she wouldn't
talk, what trauma kept her trapped inside herself. But he wasn't going to push.
He could certainly understand the overwhelming desire to hide away, to forget
the rest of the world. He felt the same way. In fact, at that moment, there was
no place he would rather be than in that basement with her.
He was holding on too tightly to
her, he knew that. He realized that the moment she retreated behind the walls
of her mind, after the shocking news they'd heard on the radio. The way he felt
a part of himself retreat within her as well. And he also knew it wasn't fair
to her. She had enough wounds of her own that needed healing. He shouldn't
expect her to heal his as well.
But he couldn't help it. She had
reached out to him in her time of need, had let him in, even if it was just to
help her chase her demons away for a while. But it was enough for both of them.
And she was something tangible he could put his faltering faith into. She was real.
She gave him what he had failed to find in God of late—a reason for his life.
As long as she needed him, he would
be there. And perhaps if he could help her, he would find the peace he'd been
searching for.
Fatigue weighed heavily on his eyelids
and he yawned, leaning his back against the beam. He felt her hand touch his
and he looked at her. She stretched her legs out in front of her and patted her
lap. He gave her a questioning look. She spoke in pseudo-sign language—pointing
to him, then putting her hands together and placing them against her cheek,
then patting her lap again.
He understood. She wanted him to
sleep. He shook his head. "I'm fine, Buffy. I don't need to sleep. But you
go ahead and rest."
She shook her head vehemently and
tugged at his arm. He sighed and reluctantly scooted over and laid down,
placing his head in her lap. He felt her fingers slowly work through his hair,
easing out the tangles. The rhythmic movement soothed him and in no time he was
asleep.
***
Ever since she returned home from Giles',
she had had the feeling that she was being watched. But every time she looked
outside, she saw nothing. Which didn't
necessarily mean anything. Angelus was an expert at hiding in plain sight. He
was probably out there now, watching her.
She fought back the chills that
threatened to run up her spine. And she nearly jumped out of her skin when the
phone rang. Breathlessly, she picked it up.
"H-Hello?"
"We have a package for Willow
Rosenberg at the front desk. Tell her she can pick it up at any time..."
Willow's breath returned to her and
she swallowed the lump in her throat. "Okay. Thanks." She hung up the phone and closed her eyes.
Come on, Will. Get a hold of
yourself.
She grabbed her keys and went
downstairs. Signing for the small, plainly wrapped box, she sat down in the
lobby and opened it.
Inside the box was a piece of paper
rolled up like a scroll and tied with a remnant of a scarf. She reached in with
a trembling hand and grasped the mysterious gift in her fingers. The scarf; she
recognized it. It used to belong to Buffy. And she held her breath as she
untied and unrolled the parchment.
Her breath exited her lungs in a
loud rush and she let out a stifled cry. Headstones--eight of them. All in a row. Each one with a name--Christa,
Sharon, Amanda, Katie, Michelle. But the last three names made her heart stop.
Cordelia, Wesley, ... and Buffy.
***
She was screaming and he was
holding her down. She kept struggling under his grip, her hair falling in all
directions. Tears soaked her terrified face and she flailed helplessly under
his strength.
He was killing her.
Riley's eyes flew open in a panic.
And he sat up, reaching blindly through the darkness for her, his breath coming
in ragged gasps and the sweat stinging his eyes.
"Buffy!" he choked out
hoarsely, overcome with fear and an overwhelming sense of helplessness.
She touched his arm and he turned
to face her, catching the outline of her face in the moonlight. Tears of relief
flooded his eyes as he pulled her to him in a tight embrace, pressing her body
to his. He felt her arms circle his neck, her fingers tangle through his hair,
and he buried his face in her shoulder, sobbing.
"Oh God, Buffy..." he
managed, curling his fingers into her back, grasping bunches of her shirt in
his fists. "He was...and I couldn't protect you...I couldn't protect any
of them..." His whole body shook with his cries and he felt her arms tighten
around him. "I'm sorry...I'm so sorry..." And he cried until there
were no more tears.
She let him go only when she felt
his arms relax around her. She pushed away and looked into his eyes, her own
wet with tears. She cupped his face gently in her hands, wiping his tears away
softly with her thumbs. And she smiled.
Riley's heart broke when he saw
that. Here was this girl—so fragile and so full of pain that she couldn't even
speak. And she was comforting him, trying to bring peace back to his aching
soul. It didn't seem right.
He touched her face, blocking the
trail of the tear that was rolling down her cheek with the tip of his finger
and brushing it away.
"I wish that I could help
you..." he whispered, letting the words hang in the air between them.
She leaned in and pressed her lips
softly against his forehead. He closed his eyes. She moved to his eyes, his
cheeks, and finally to his lips, where she remained for a long moment.
She drew back slightly, exhaling in
a slow, steady stream. Riley could feel the warm, damp air against his skin and
he opened his eyes. He made as if to speak, but Buffy silenced him with a
finger to his lips. She shook her head slightly and sat back.
And Riley watched silently as Buffy
began unbuttoning her shirt—slowly, one tiny button at a time. He was entranced
with the way the moonlight danced across her skin and with the way her eyes
never left his face. She dropped her hands and inched closer, the front of her
shirt completely open. Riley could see the soft swells of her breasts as they
rose and fell with each breath.
She reached for his hand—her small
one even tinier next to his large one—and pressed it to her heart. And he felt
the familiar rhythm beneath his fingers and the soft, silky skin against his
own.
She returned the favor, pressing
her hand to his chest and searching for that familiar sign of life. Of
strength. Of vitality. And when she felt the steady beating beneath her
fingertips, she closed her eyes, content in the knowledge that there was
another living soul so close to her own. Lone tears rolled silently down her
face.
Riley kissed them away, tasting
their salty sweetness on his lips. And suddenly he felt himself drowning in
her, as she blocked out the rest of the world and became his only reality, his
only truth.
She clung to him, wanting, needing
to lose herself in his eyes, his arms, his touch. She needed him to push her
pain away, even if only for a little while.
***
Angelus could afford to be patient.
That was the beauty of being immortal—he had nothing but time. But despite this
luxury, he couldn't contain his own excitement.
He had done his part--sent them
each a little something to remember him by. Something they were sure to show
the Slayer. Something that would bring her to him.
She would be here; he could feel
it.
All he had to do was wait.
***
The streets of Sunnydale were
deserted, the glow of the streetlamps illuminating the empty sidewalks. Since
the last two murdered girls had been found, the city had ceased to function
after dark—stores closed early, people barricaded themselves inside their
homes. And the only things roaming the town were animals and those that hunted
them.
An eerie stillness descended upon
the city.
***
The three people sitting in the
small dorm room were silent. They had gathered there two hours before, each
sharing with the others their "gift" from Angelus. They were all the
same—the same picture wrapped with remnants of the same scarf.
Willow sat on Buffy's bed, hugging
Mr. Gordo tightly to her chest. Xander sat beside her, his trademark sarcasm
failing him. Giles sat across from them, on Willow's bed, elbows on his knees,
staring at the floor. His voice—the one of reason and logic—was as silent as
the others'.
Cordelia. Wesley. Two more
casualties in Angelus' personal war. But the tears for their fallen friends
didn't come. Perhaps they would later. But for now, there was nothing more that
could be done for them.
And still no word from Buffy. They
tried not to think the worst, but they expected it. Life in Sunnydale and
memories of The Days of Angelus, Part One had conditioned them to see the glass
as half empty.
Or completely empty, as the case
may be.
***
They lay on the floor, nothing but an
old, worn-out blanket between their bodies and the dusty concrete.
They lay entwined—her head on his
chest and his arm around her protectively. She was sleeping peacefully, the nightmares that had plagued her the
night before seemingly giving her a respite this night.
Riley was grateful. She needed her
rest. And though he himself was exhausted, he couldn't tear his eyes away from
her face. She had spoken to him. Not with words—for the soft moans she'd made
in his ear had been the first sounds he'd heard her make in hours. No, she had
spoken to him with actions, with wordless declarations. She had offered herself
to him and had trusted him enough to lay bare the tattered shreds of her soul.
All for the sake of easing his. How was it possible that this tiny, sadly
beautiful girl
could herself be so empty and yet still offer him so much?
He brushed her hair off her
shoulder, gently twisting the soft tresses between his fingers. That's when he
saw it, sparkling in the faint moonlight. He had never noticed it before. But
now, her body revealed to him, he saw it for the first time.
Her cross.
That symbol had occupied his
thoughts so many times in the last few days, in so many different
contexts—faith, death, doubt, anger, and now...what could he call it? Love? Was
he in love with this fragile girl sleeping against him? He couldn't say.
He grasped the small silver charm
in his fingers and rubbed it with his thumb pensively. He had been struggling
to hold on to his faith, asking himself if it was really worth believing when
it seemed He had forgotten them all. And just when he had resigned himself to
the fact that he had only been fooling himself into believing in something that
didn't exist, here comes a little reminder that perhaps there was a God after
all.
He kissed the top of her head and
closed his eyes, finally allowing sleep to overtake him.
***
He had spent the day getting ready
for her arrival. And now he was prepared.
The blood in his veins grew
warmer--she was close. He sat back in the chair and stretched his tense
muscles.
Looking around, he smiled.
Everything was perfect.
And he was ready.
***
When she opened her eyes and felt
his body—a body that produced its own
warmth—beneath her skin and heard the steady beating of his heart under her
ear, she felt relief wash over her.
But what provided her with even
more comfort was the simple fact that he was there. She had shared what was
left of herself with him and he had accepted it without question. The fact that
he was there, holding her when she opened her eyes, was enough.
She carefully and reluctantly
removed his arm from around her and sat up. She looked at his face, beautiful in the glow of the moon, and smiled at
the peaceful expression that softened his features.
Two nights ago, in the park, she
had seen in his eyes what she had felt in her heart—loneliness and a desperate
need to escape. So they had escaped together, each asking no more of the other
than they were willing to give. They had left the big questions unanswered,
content to seek answers to the smaller ones—would you stay with me? hold my
hand when I get scared? be my world for a little while?
Two days had passed. And two
nights. And now it was time to go. She had been hiding long enough.
He—Angelus—was waiting for her. And she must go to him. She had come
face-to-face with her inner demons and Riley had helped her fight them.
But now it was time to face another demon.
She stood and dressed quickly,
never taking her eyes from Riley's face. She knelt down next to him and brushed
his cheek with the back of her hand. He stirred but did not awaken.
She pressed her lips to his
forehead softly, then pulled back and wrote something with her finger in the
dust beside his head.
"Goodbye."
She stood and left quietly.
***
The overwhelming sounds of silence
pulsated through the early dawn. Buffy walked slowly but with purpose. She had
to fight the urge with every step to turn around and run back to the anonymity
of the basement, back to where she didn't have to explain herself or deal with
reality.
But she continued to walk, putting
one foot in front of the other, gradually closing the gap between where she
wanted to be and where she had to be. And the closer she got to her ultimate
destination, the less she thought of other things. Until there was only one
thing on her mind.
Angelus.
***
The four eyes widened when they
spotted her. There she was—pretty and blonde and alone. The favorite flavor of
their friendly neighborhood undead serial killer. But even more relevant to
them was the fact that their missing comrade was nowhere around.
Graham moved to get up, to go after her. But Forrest's hand on
his arm stopped him. He looked over, meeting the dark brown eyes staring back
at him.
"Don't you dare," Forrest
whispered harshly.
Graham replied defensively,
"We can't just let her wander around by herself."
Forrest shrugged, looking over his
shoulder at Buffy, who was getting farther away with each passing second, then
back to Graham. "Does she look like she's wandering to you? No, she's
definitely headed somewhere." He paused and looked at her again.
"Maybe to Finn. Let's go."
And the two of them started to
follow her.
***
The shriek of the ringing phone cut
through the thick silence. Willow flinched, looked around quickly at the other
two people in the room, and reached for the receiver, pressing it to her ear.
"Buffy?" she answered
urgently, her heart pounding in her ears so loudly that she could barely hear
the voice on the other end.
"Shit..." it croaked and
Willow could hear air as it left lungs in a loud rush. Then a click.
"Hello?" she asked
nervously.
Nothing.
***
Riley stared at the phone in his
hand, his fingers gripping it so tightly that his knuckles were white. He had
awakened to find himself alone and had searched the darkness for her. No Buffy.
It took all the strength he could muster just to call the operator for her
number.
Then he found her message. It was
just one word—"Goodbye"—but it told him more than a thousand words ever
could. She was gone. The letters stood out even more as the faintest rays of
sunlight streamed through the windows. He stared at them again, reading the
word over and over until it ricocheted around in his head.
There was something daunting and
ominous in the simplicity of her message. Did she mean goodbye for now or forever? He wasn't sure he wanted to
know the answer.
His heart pounding, he began
pulling on his clothes. He had to find her.
Okay, he thought, trying to calm
himself. She's not home. Where else could she be? Think, Finn, think. But he
didn't have a clue where to start looking.
Tying up his last boot lace, he
started to run out the door. But he stopped and ran back, suddenly feeling the
need for a weapon. Digging through his gear, he grabbed his pistol and shoved
it in the waistband of his pants.
Then he went to grab the stake from
the spot where he'd last left it.
But it was gone.
***
They followed her through the park,
past the cemetery, and into the woods onthe edge of town. She hadn't stopped
for anything and her steady strides hadn't faltered once.
She stepped through the trees and
into a clearing, the two soldiers a few yards behind. She was headed towards
the old abandoned mansion.
"So that's where Finn's been hiding,"
Forrest said absently. He looked at
Graham, eyebrows raised. Graham just shrugged.
They watched as she ascended the
front steps one at a time and were about to follow suit when Forrest's phone
rang. He sighed in annoyance and put the phone to his ear.
"Gates," he said shortly.
Professor Walsh's authoritative
voice rang through from the other end. "Agent Finn has just used his cell phone to call Buffy Summers'
dorm room. The call was traced to within a half-mile radius surrounding the old
Sunnydale High School remains. I want you to find him and bring him to me. Understood?"
Forrest's confused look as he
turned his head back towards the mansion did not go unnoticed by Graham. He
touched Forrest's arm and put his palms up as if to ask, "Well?"
Shrugging him off, Forrest answered
"Yes ma'am" into the phone and snapped it shut, placing it back in
his pocket. He looked at the mansion again, his mind working. Then he looked
back at Graham.
"We gotta go," he said
quickly. "Seems Finn ain't with our girl Buffy here. Walsh wants us to
fetch him and bring him to her."
"She knows where he is?"
Graham asked, looking at the old mansion briefly before turning and following
Forrest. Buffy was no longer in sight.
Forrest grunted. "More or
less."
***
"I was beginning to wonder if
you'd make it," Angelus said, his back to her. He didn't have to turn around to know she was there.
Buffy stood just inside the
doorway, her fists clenched against her sides. And for the first time in days, she found her voice.
"You knew I'd be here."
He chuckled--that same maniacal
laugh that had haunted her dreams. And he turned around to face her.
"Indeed I did, lover. Because I know you—how you think, what you feel,
what you feel *like*..." A smile etched across his deceivingly angelic
face.
Buffy let that comment pass. She
took another step inside and looked around. There were candles burning all around the room, casting eerie shadows on
the walls and accentuating Angelus' deep-set eyes. She continued to walk
further into the room, taking it all in.
She remembered every inch of this
place—every room, every corner, every chip of paint. It had always held so much
meaning for her. And she hadn't been back since Angel left. It was just too
hard to remember things as they used to be and to think about all the things
she couldn't have. So she had just stayed away.
Her eyes fell upon his shrine and
she stopped. Five smiling faces stared back at her from above the fireplace,
each one representing a life that she couldn't save. And she swallowed the bile
that rose in her throat.
His voice drew her back to the
present and she looked at him. "They really do look a lot like you, don't
they?" He paused, drawing out his words. "Or I guess I should say
they *did*..." The corners of his mouth turned up slightly, making his
eyes dance.
"Yes, they did," she said
simply, keeping her gaze focused on his face. She kept her voice low. "And
you're a coward. Killing innocent girls because you can't have the one you
want." Her green eyes flashed in the soft light.
Angelus put his hands up in feigned
surrender, the maddening smile all the while adorning his face. "Ooh...I
see someone's regained possession of her backbone." He took a step
forward, now only a few feet away from her. "That's okay. I just love a challenge..."
Buffy watched silently as he drew
his finger slowly back and forth through the flame of the candle next to him.
He was playing his usual games with her—showing her that he wasn't afraid.
Especially not of her.
***
He was running and calling out her
name, his eyes searching frantically for her.
"Buffy!" His voice took
on a high tone and didn't sound like his own. "Buffy!"
A hand grabbed his arm and he spun
around, gripping the shoulders of his captor for support. He looked into
familiar eyes—Forrest's.
"Whoa, brother. Slow down.
Where's the fire?" Forrest asked lightly, letting go of Riley's arm.
Riley blinked and took a step back. His mind was racing and he
could barely form a coherent thought.
"Buffy," he said quickly,
backing away. "I have to find her..." And he turned to go.
Forrest grabbed his arm again.
"Not right now, you're not. I've got orders to take you to Walsh. She's
been bitchier than usual since you went AWOL." He studied Riley's face closely.
"Later," Riley said,
shaking his head. "Buffy's in danger..."
Forrest didn't relinquish his arm.
"She's fine," he said, immediately regretting it.
Riley's eyes grew wide. "You
saw her? Where?" he asked urgently, yanking his arm away.
"Nowhere. Now let's go,"
Forrest answered flatly, reaching for Riley's arm again.
But Riley backed away. "Tell
me where she is."
"I don't know," Forrest
answered, lying. "Now let's go. You know how Walsh gets when she's left
waiting." And he took a step closer to Riley, reaching his hand out as if
to usher Riley back to base. But all he got was a gun barrel in his face.
Riley held the pistol tightly in
his hand and pointed it at Forrest. He took a breath. "Tell me where she
is or I kill you. Your choice." His voice was low and even.
Forrest clenched his jaw. "I'm
not telling you."
The click of metal against metal as
Riley cocked the gun was deafening in the thick silence of the early morning.
"Last chance," he muttered.
Graham finally spoke up. "Last
time we saw her, she was at the old mansion on the edge of town," he said
quietly. Forrest groaned disapprovingly beside
him.
Riley looked at Graham, seemingly
noticing him for the first time that night. "The mansion?" he asked absently.
Graham nodded and opened his mouth
to say something, but Riley was already gone.
Forrest moved to go after him and
angrily turned on Graham when he felt Graham's fingers tighten around his arm.
"What the hell are you doing?" he spat.
"Let him go," Graham
responded simply.
***
The people of Sunnydale would soon
be getting ready for their day. Life moved on despite the fear that consumed
them. It was easier to forget in the harsh light of day about the terrors
awaiting them after dark.
Slowly, people opened their eyes,
one at a time, and peeked cautiously into the face of the day.
Maybe today would be the day all
the madness would end.
***
Buffy looked at him squarely.
"I'm sick of your games, Angelus. This ends tonight."
He stared at her for a moment,
tilting his head to the side slightly and looking her up and down. She looked
the same as she did three nights ago—her stance, her face, her clothes. She was
wearing the same clothes and he realized that she hadn't been home since he had
last seen her.
And now he knew exactly how to
erase the determination he saw flash in her eyes.
"I see your friends aren't
here," he said slowly and deliberately. "I wonder why..." He
smiled slightly.
Buffy shifted uncomfortably and her
face fell almost imperceptibly. But Angelus noticed it and it told him that she
had not spoken to them recently. So he
continued.
"The redhead put up quite a
struggle. She was stronger than she looked. And she gave out a rather loud
scream before I snapped her neck..." He snuffed the flame out between his
fingers and moved to the next one, never taking his eyes off her.
Buffy felt her stomach tighten at
his words and she swallowed down the growing lump in her throat.
"The boy was such a
disappointment, though," he continued, walking slowly through the maze of
candles and putting them out one by one. The room got darker by the second.
"He tried to be brave with his tough words and all. But in the end, he pissed himself like a
child. What a let down..."
Feeling her resolve start to break,
Buffy closed her eyes. "No..." she whispered.
Angelus grinned widely at her
reaction. He watched triumphantly as her shoulders slumped and she bowed her
head. He had inserted the knife. Now all he had to do was twist it.
"The old man was rather
entertaining. Kept quoting the Bible in Latin. I didn't know he was a religious
man. Funny, the things you discover about a person right before you kill them.
What is that saying? 'Therein death lies the truth.'"
The only light in the room was the
glow from the fireplace. The thick black curtains blocked the early morning
sunlight. Buffy felt tears sting her eyes as she shook her head. "You're
lying..." she said weakly.
He was behind her; she could feel
his breath on her neck as he leaned in and whispered, "Too bad you'll
never know, will you? Because you're right. This does end tonight."
But when she turned to face him, he
was gone. She peered into the shadows, but saw nothing. He was dancing that
same maddeningly slow dance with her that he had in the park that night. He was
close, hovering, but she couldn't see him.
Buffy spun on her heels when she
heard a familiar voice scream her name.
Riley stood in the doorway, his
silhouette dark against the early morning sky. "Buffy, thank God..."
he said, taking a step towards her.
She put a hand up and shook her
head, trying to stop him. "Riley. Don't."
The door slammed shut and
instinctively, Riley spun around and pointed the gun he still held in his hand
at the culprit.
Angelus smiled at him. "Well,
look who we have here. If it isn't Buffy's soldier boy from the park. Fancy
meeting you here." He stood in front of the door, gazing amusedly at
Riley.
"Who the hell are you?"
Riley asked angrily.
Buffy answered softly from behind
him, "He killed those girls."
Riley was taken aback slightly by
her words and he looked over his shoulder at her. But as soon as he did,
Angelus pounced, grabbing the gun and pinning Riley's arms behind his back,
pressing the gun to his temple. Riley struggled under his grasp. He stared at
Buffy through the dim light, silently begging her to explain.
She held his gaze for a moment
before turning her eyes towards his captor. "Let him go," she said evenly, her jaw clenched.
Angelus chuckled. "Now why
would I do that? We've barely gotten to know each other." He tightened his
grip on Riley's arms. "Have we?" he asked, directing it at Riley.
Struggling against his restraints,
Riley spat bitterly, "Go to hell."
"No thanks," Angelus
replied lightly. "I've been there. Really not worth a return trip."
He inhaled deeply. "What is that scent?" he asked, sniffing Riley
again. Then he smiled knowingly. "Ah, yes. I know that scent well. Post-coitus Buffy..."
Riley's eyes never left Buffy's face.
And until that moment, her face had been like a mask—never changing
expressions. But at the vampire's words, he saw her eyes cloud up, saw the thin
lines crease her forehead.
"It took a week to wash that
stench off completely," Angelus continued. "And she had been so
willing. So soft and warm and...virginal. Was she ready for you? 'Cause she was
just *aching* for me..." He spoke slowly, letting his words sink in.
Riley felt more nauseated with
every word and closed his eyes. He couldn't stand to look at Buffy any
longer—the way she kept sinking further into herself, the way she bowed her
head and couldn't look at him anymore. He knew that what the vampire was saying
was the truth.
"My favorite part was when she
came—the way she arched into me, her eyes rolling back into her head. The way
she moaned my name," Angelus explained, leaning in and whispering in
Riley's ear, "Oh, Angel..."
Riley's eyes flew open. He
recognized that name—Angel. Buffy had muttered it in her sleep, when she cried
out during her nightmares. And he suddenly became filled with rage, finally
being able to put a face with the name—a face that had haunted them both though
he hadn't recognized it.
And despite the gun pressed to his
temple, he started struggling again. "You sick bastard," he said
through clenched teeth. He looked at Buffy. She lifted her eyes and met his
wearily.
Angelus leaned in and whispered in
Riley's ear again, keeping his eyes on Buffy's face. "It may have been
your lips she kissed, but it was my face she saw..."
Riley studied Buffy's face; the way
it changed expressions so rapidly from one of sadness to one of embarrassment
to one of anger. But the tears that he saw welled up in her eyes remained
constant.
And he had seen and heard enough.
He reared back and slammed the back
of his head into Angelus' forehead, taking the vampire by surprise. Angelus
loosened his grip and Riley broke free, running towards Buffy. A shot rang out
and Riley crumpled to the floor in pain. He looked up into the barrel of the
gun, grabbing his knee, blood seeping between his fingers.
"Nice try, boy," Angelus
said, touching the cut on his forehead gingerly. "You really are hard-headed, aren't you?" He cocked the
gun again.
"Leave him alone," Buffy
said from behind Angelus. "It's me you want."
Angelus turned to face her and
smiled. "Truer words have never been spoken," he muttered softly.
He walked up to her and stopped
inches from where she stood looking up at him. Then he followed her gaze as she
shifted it to Riley lying wounded on the floor.
"It's just so touching how she
came to your rescue, isn't it? I mean, she just tried so hard to save
you..." Angelus' dark eyes flashed with merriment. "And could you try
not to bleed so much? You're making me rather hungry..." He chuckled--a
low, rolling rumble in his chest.
Riley tried to move, to lunge at
him, but he caught Buffy's eyes and stopped. She was looking at him so intensely as she stood next to the vampire.
And the hardness of her expression told him to stay still. She shook her head
slightly—once—and looked at him as if to ask, Do you trust me?
He had no reason to trust her; he
barely knew her. And yet, he felt as if he knew everything about her; at least
the things that mattered. He held her gaze and nodded. He did trust her.
Completely.
"He's not important, Angelus.
He's nobody. He's not even worth the effort it would take you to kill
him..." Her voice was clear and steady. And she turned her eyes back to
the vampire.
Angelus gazed at her curiously.
Then he laughed. "How does it feel to know you're expendable?" he
asked, looking at Riley briefly. "She doesn't even care whether you live
or die." He turned his eyes back to Buffy. "But you care whether I
do, don't you, lover?" he cooed, brushing her face with the barrel of the
gun, drawing it slowly from her temple to her chin. "Because all you can
see is your precious Angel. My eyes are his eyes, my voice is his voice, my lips,"
he said slowly, leaning in and brushing her lips with his, "are his
lips..." he finished, pulling back.
Buffy swallowed and closed her
eyes, pushing the tears out and letting them fall unhindered down her face.
"Tears for your fallen Angel.
How touching..." he whispered, touching her face. "But he's gone,
lover. Forever..."
Buffy took a deep breath and opened
her eyes again, looking into the deep brown ones of her nemesis. And for the
first time, she didn't see Angel in them.
"You're right. He is,"
she whispered. She looked quickly at Riley, whose eyes were still on her, and
then grabbed Angelus by the front of his shirt and pulled him to her, pressing
her lips to his roughly. Then she grabbed the stake from her back pocket and
shoved it into his chest, letting her hands fall to her sides as he turned to
dust, the gun clanging heavily against the stone floor.
And for a long moment, the only
sound that could be heard was the crackling fire.
***
The town of Sunnydale was experiencing
a reawakening. No one had been
arrested, but the the killings had stopped. And somehow the people knew that
the insanity was over. Smiles were wider, laughter was louder, and breath
was no longer hard to come by.
Things returned to normal. Which
for Sunnydale, was anything but.
But the people would take it.
***
Christa Matthews. Sharon McCormick.
Amanda Baxter. Katie Phillips. Michelle
Richardson. Names etched in stone for all to see. To never forget.
The memorial had been erected in
their honor—the fallen innocents. And two people stood in front of it now,
silently reading the names and remembering.
Riley shifted his weight
uncomfortably on his crutches and looked down at the small girl next to him.
She reached her hand up and touched the marble, brushing her fingers lightly
over each name. And she closed her eyes.
He gently brushed her hair off her
shoulder and let his hand rest against her back beneath it. He turned his gaze
back to the monument, watching her fingers trace each letter reverently.
She dropped her hand to her side
and let out her breath, looking up at him and studying his profile. The she
softly asked him, "Do you believe in God, Riley?"
Her words caught him by surprise
and he turned his head to look at her, his eyes holding hers. He had asked
himself that same question so many times and had never found the answer. And
here it was, put to him again.
He paused before answering, wanting
to be sure. He looked once again at the five names etched in marble—five young
women who had died needlessly, whose lives had been taken in defiance of the
God that was supposed to protect them. But then he looked back at Buffy, at her
beautiful face and her sad, expressive eyes. And he felt that there must be
some higher power at work somewhere. She had gone to the edge and had fought
her way back. And she was standing there with him. Her smile and her compassion
represented all that was good in the world.
Taking a breath, he touched her
cheek and said softly, "Yes, I do." And he smiled at her. He reached
down and took her cross in his hand, rubbing it between his fingers. "Do
you?"
Her eyes clouded up momentarily and
she looked down at her feet, sighing heavily. "I want to," she
replied softly. "But I can't."
Riley brushed the back of his hand
across her cheek. "You have to believe in something," he told her.
She looked up at him and smiled.
"I do," she whispered, taking his hand.
Riley smiled and squeezed her hand.
