Helloooo friends! Here is another "missing scene", technically. I had an urge to write a one shot tonight so I did a bit of asking around with my good friends on Twitter. Had a few suggestions for ideas, all of which I will probably get to eventually, but this one suggested by Lacorra was the easiest to throw together - thanks to her and everyone for their suggestions. Thanks to Shannon and Lauren too for volunteering to play along with helping me come up with a scenario too! There was also a bit of a mini-challenge involved with fitting in some particularly "English" words and those of you involved know who you are. Consider it completed. It's un-beta'd so forgive any mistakes but I hope you enjoy it!
"Another girl. Can you believe it?" Lena smiled, her eyes glowing at the swirls of black and grey that she held on the small photo in her hand.
"Well at least our two will be out of the house by the time we have another teenage girl vying for the bathroom." Stef chuckled.
"What do you think she'll be like?" Lena mused, barely even registering that there was anything in the room other than the perfect little piece of her heart that she held in her hand.
"Well if she takes after her Mama, she'll be beautiful, smart, caring, loving..." Stef continued to reel off the compliments as she moved forward nuzzling kisses onto Lena's neck, provoking a small giggle from her wife before she pushed her chin away and met her lips with a kiss.
"And I guess if she's like Timothy then we'll have to make sure we make a formal agreement on what chores we expect her to do before we give her any allowance." Her voice dropped into a deadpan growl as Lena rolled her eyes, her mouth dropping into a stoney frown.
"But hey, maybe she'll come out with an interesting vocabulary. Uttering words like buffoon and chomp...or pish posh." Stef mimicked the best English accent she could as Lena shook her head with a quite chortle. "First of all I'm pretty sure that not all Brits talk like that, Timothy certainly doesn't. And secondly could we maybe enjoy this moment without thinking of that man and his stupid genes?" She added nonchalant with a hint of spite as Stef nodded elaborately, taking the picture off her for her own turn to fawn over it.
"That sounds good to me baby, what about you, huh? Little Lena?" She spoke close to her wife's belly, flopping down onto her own as Lena giggled, pulling up her shirt so she could get closer. "What do you think of this photo, huh? Is it your good side or are you going to be like your sister and have to take another twenty before you're happy with it?" She chattered away before they were interrupted by a timid knock at the door. Lena quickly covered up her stomach as Stef raced up to slip the ultrasound away. They had decided to keep the information from the kids for now until they decided exactly how much they were going to share with them and how much they would leave as a surprise.
"Come in." Lena called as soon as the photo was hidden from sight. The door creaked open to reveal a shy looking Callie, her arms tucked behind her back and her body barely poking round the side. In her tight grasp, concealed from view, was the letter that had dominated her thoughts for the better part of two weeks and the force with which she was clasping it a fitting representation of the hold it had had on her mind. It had tossed and turned it, leaving little room for clarity, but finally tonight some whispers of rationale had fought their way through the tangle of insecurity and doubt and convinced her that she could delay this talk no longer.
"Is this a bad time?" She asked, some of those insecurities still making a play to facilitate her backing out. They were quickly stifled however by Stef hopping forward, patting the bed.
"Of course not, honey. Come, sit!" She beamed, her good mood shining through every crease on her face. Forcing her quietening reluctance into submission, Callie crossed over the threshold and edged into the room.
"I was just hoping to talk to you about something." She added as she slipped delicately onto the bed, sitting on the envelope she had been holding behind her back.
"Sure, what's on your mind, babe?" Lena asked kindly as Callie looked between them both. The doubts made a play again as the difficulty of the task seemed to grow before her. She almost felt like she was confessing some dark secret. Would they be mad with her for not telling them? Would they feel offended that she was wanting to look into this other family - had she already begun the alienation by waiting so long to tell them? Stef's forehead was creasing slightly, making her realise that the pause would not be helping matters.
"Is there any progress with the abandonment papers?" she asked curiously, hoping it may give her a segue into the topic at hand. Although she'd intended it to come off conversational, the hesitation had squandered any hopes of that, not help by the suspicious quiver in her voice.
Stef and Lena looked to each other, Callie's guilty demeanour beginning to make them nervous.
"Uhm, not yet sweets. Marie hasn't given us an update for a couple of days but she'll tell us when Robert's lawyers have got back in touch. They like taking their time, I think. I wonder if they're being paid hourly." Stef half sniggered hoping it may ease what seemed to be a growing angst around the room. Callie returned the comment with half a smile but not content with its sincerity, Stef placed herself next to her daughter and gently squeezed her knee, catching her gaze and gently urging her to continue.
"Are you worried about them?" Lena asked, verbalising the gentle concern in Stef's eyes.
"No, it's not that." Callie gulped, twitching the paper beneath her thigh. She saw that the twitch had not gone unnoticed by Lena, and as she saw her forehead wrinkle looking down at the cause, she decided that it was best to just come out with it before she was asked.
"I was just wondering if it would be possible for me to go and visit him and his family. Robert Quinn, I mean." she spoke gently as she felt Stef's touch inadvertently tense. Her mouth stuttered soundlessly as she passed a look of surprise to Lena, her expression almost equally as lost for words.
Hearing the silence more daunting than any of the responses she had dreaded, Callie quickly continued.
"It doesn't matter if you don't want me to. I mean, it's probably a bad idea, right? You know, I shouldn't have suggested it." she shook her head and pinched the bridge of her nose with her free hand, trying to move off but Stef quickly jumped in, the reaction being enough to shake her out of her silence.
"Wait, no - look that's understandable. Just...let's just hold on for a second, sweets."
"I'm sorry." Callie quickly replied. "I didn't mean to blindside you with it -"
"No, no." Lena now spoke placing her hands down flat on the bed with a steady pat. "We're glad you came to us with this. It's important that we know what you're thinking. This isn't an easy situation and we're happy that you feel you can talk to us. We want you to talk to us."
"Yes. Mama's absolutely right." Stef patted Callie's knee. Her voice had now gathered a firm confidence even though her body still shuffled with unease. "It's completely understandable that you would consider wanting to meet him, and ultimately it's your decision - that's what we've said all along."
Callie sucked her lips together, partly reassured and partly feeling even more guilty over what she was now going to have to admit. That is, if she did have to admit it. She subconsciously flinched the paper deeper under her leg. Did she really have to give them the full details? Maybe she could just pretend like she had done with Donald...though in the end she had admitted that to them anyway - what's more, she didn't want to lie to them about this. They were right, she did feel she could come to them, even if the process of doing so still took a little time.
"The thing is - " She spoke without even realising the words were coming out. "I sort of already have met him." As soon as she finished the sentence she could see a shift in both looks. Lena's seemed to enlarge before they looked over to Stef's but those were fixed on Callie, narrowing but filling with concern.
"What uhm...what do you mean you've already met him?" She finally asked, clearing her through through the first couple of words as if the shock had sucked the moisture out of her mouth.
"He came to visit me...at work." Callie explained, keeping her tone steady but biting her lips together awaiting the backlash. She could see that the concern in Stef's eyes was turning swiftly into anger. This matched the chill which now seemed to grasp her voice.
"At work?" She replied sternly. "He approached you at your workplace?"
"Honey." Lena warned her, sensing the ramp in her voice. Stef snapped her head to her wife, her lips poised to continue to express her outrage but she closed them gently instead and moved off the bed sweeping her arms across her chest and pacing away.
"How many times exactly did he come to visit you?" She asked, only barely managing to suppress the fury. It was clear that it wasn't Callie she was angry at, but it didn't stop it from making her uncomfortable as her whole body readjusted into a more closed up pose.
"A few, I guess. I'm not sure - as soon as he found out I knew who he was he stopped coming."
"So you told him you knew who he was? Wait, how did you even find out it was him?" Stef replied, the pace of her questions a worthy replacement for volume in still expressing how unsettling she found the information.
"Callie." Lena took control of the conversation being able to know when Stef's protective instincts may be clouding her tactfullness. With the opportunity to adjust her focus, Callie looked sheepishly into Lena's much calmer face. There was still a dominance of worry but it was clear she was at least doing a better job of hiding it than Stef was.
"Can you tell us exactly what happened? We just need to process the stages of this. It may be important."
"Important for what?" Callie replied immediately, now suddenly feeling nervous. "I mean, it can't affect the adoption - can it?" She wasn't sure how this could have a negative impact but suddenly her head filled with permutations - after all when did anything in her life not complicate things further? Seeing a sudden shift in Callie's confidence, Lena placed a hand gently her knee. The gesture somehow had the added effect of calming Stef as she realised her anguish wasn't doing anyone any favours. She took a deep breath and put her anger aside, returning to the bed with as supportive a look as she could muster. The mixture of reassurance was enough to clear Callie's head as she rubbed her temple and collected the timeline in her mind.
"A few weeks ago this guy started coming into the restaurant a lot, leaving pretty noticeable tips."
"Of course he did." Stef muttered cynically before being silenced with a look from Lena.
"I talked to him a couple of times, he seemed nice. I guess he took a bit of an interest so I remembered his face, then when Robert didn't show up for the DNA test I got curious. I mean, it's not that I hadn't been before, but I just didn't want to know, you know? I wasn't sure I wanted to have a face to the name but then I was so...kind of...hurt that he didn't show..." her voice froze briefly as she awoke the latent feelings she had put aside. In all of the drama since, she had barely thought about that day and the curiosity that had engulfed her. It had somehow all shifted to the emotions tied to this not being just a name or a face, and without realising it her entire perception had changed. It was the personification of the name that had suddenly raised the stakes and had brought her to this position right now. Would delving deeper into that change things yet again? She shook her head realising she was going off track and tried to re-focus, clearing her throat as she looked down to her knees.
"So I searched his name and there he was. The man from the café." She finished quickly and flippantly as if to disguise the lapse in her composure. She ended it with a humourless laugh through her nose, once again haplessly hoping her misfortune would finally turn around and let her in on the joke.
"That was when he gave me this." She nervously pulled out the envelope she had been concealing and held it out to Lena before dipping her head back down. She wasn't sure she wanted to see the reaction considering how well the earlier revelation had gone down.
Lena skimmed the letter before handing the picture to Stef who took it with as quiet a sigh as she could produce. She didn't need to read the letter to figure out who the picture must be of. The resemblance to Callie was overwhelming.
"So you have a half sister." Stef commented as Callie replied with a slow nod.
"Sophia." She whispered as Lena finished reading over the letter and handed it to Stef who replaced her glasses to study it. Her face was fixed in a grimace as she scrutinised every word. Callie watched them both carefully, conscious only to each flicker of their face and to the quiet throbbing in the vein in her neck.
"If you need time to think about..." She hesitated, trying to interpret what their response was indicating.
"No, no." Lena replied before placing down the photo and clasping her hands over Callie's knee.
"We said we would support what you wanted to do throughout this process..." She assured her as Stef quickly nodded in agreement, swallowing back her discontent as she saw the desperation in Callie's eyes.
"Yep, Mama's right." She whispered, placing her hand on Callie's arm. "I can't say that I'm thrilled about him making contact with you..." she added, her voice dropping back down to a gravelly contempt as she looked back down to the letter. "But ultimately if you think it will help you to meet them then we will see what we can arrange. With you, though. No more secrets, please."
"I know, I promise." Callie agreed, the guilt in her voice sneaking out. "I just really didn't know how to bring it up." She shrugged. "I guess I was waiting to figure out what I wanted before having to ask."
"We understand that honey, but we really don't want you to feel you have to figure these things out alone. Two weeks is a long time to sit on something like this. We're not going to try and influence you, we promise we only want to support you, not dictate."
"I know -" Callie quickly affirmed. "I know." She bit down on her lips before shrugging a smile towards them. "I guess I'm still just not used to that." She admitted quietly as both of her Moms acknowledged the truth with an understanding cock of their heads.
"And I don't want you to think that this is because...well you know, because this isn't enough." This time Stef was first to jump in, thinking back to a former promise she had made. She shuffled forward, encompassing Callie in her arms and pulling her tightly in.
"Hey now, we've talked about this. This isn't about us, remember? You don't worry about us - only you, yes?" She rubbed her daughter's arm with her hand as she planted a kiss on the side of her head. Callie nodded with a smile before allowing herself to snuggle closer into Stef's side. She felt herself fall into it willingly, indulging the comfort and warmth that trickled down her body.
"You gonna leave me all alone in here, Mama?" Stef flicked her head to Lena proving that she had successfully managed to channel her protective instincts into a healthier emotion. As Lena joined in the hug on Callie's other side she ran a hand down Stef's back in a form of acknowledgement for her efforts. They squeezed tightly, enjoying the security as much as Callie for a few moments before Stef's eyes wandered over to the discarded letter and photo on the bed. She gulped down nervously but tried to put those panics aside and closed her eyes, focussing on the embrace. As Stef's eyes closed, Callie's opened, the wash of relief still prominent. She wasn't sure what the next step would be or what the energy was that was somehow managing to draw her to these new faces. It contrasted against the powerful force of love encasing her body both figuratively and, right now, literally - but this in itself was proof she had managed to let one family in.
Maybe for the next step she just had to accept that letting another family scratch her surface wouldn't have to be a bad thing either.
I hope you enjoyed! I would love a review if you have the time, but if not then I appreciate your reading anyway :)