A/N : All the work belongs to Yun Kouga. All the characters too. I sadly don't own anything and I'm certainly not making money out of it.

Readers, thank you for dropping by and for your time. I hope you will like it. Reviews are always very much appreciated so if you have some available time, feel free to let me know your thoughts on it. Also, I'm not a native speaker so I hope I didn't mix up the past tenses too much. I'm sorry for any mistake and typo that might have escaped me.

Chapter 1

His relation with Soubi had always been difficult. From their first meeting til this day, it had never been easy, he reflected as he stood before his Fighter's door. Was it due to the age gap, to his previous bond to Seimei, to their opposite view on Soubi's life or a mix of it all?

The first year had taken a huge toll on them both. None escaped unscathed from the interlude of Seimei's death. Soubi's presence had been comforting in this dark moment and he had quickly become an anchor in his otherwise disjointed life. A fixed point, caring and gentle, affectionate and present. A protective shadow that would always have his back. Despite his weirdness, his dangerous edge, his lies and kisses, he had grown to like him and he had felt at ease with him. Not happy. Not him. But yes, he had felt good. After the graveyard incident, the void his absence had left couldn't be filled. His visceral need to be with his Fighter, to make sure he was safe and cared for, to hear him, feel him, smell him, even to quarrel with him was frightening in its intensity. He hadn't been sure he wanted to acknowledge the truth behind it yet either. But upon his return, weeks later, the carefreeness was gone, the contentment had been tainted. It took them a long time to reach a new comfort zone.

Then he turned thirteen and gradually became more self-conscious. As the year drew on, he began to avoid physical contact with him. He wouldn't be seen holding his hand, hugging or kissing anymore, not even by their friends. It felt – inappropriate. Yet he wouldn't part from him so he stayed close and spent most of his time at Soubi's place. If it weren't for his curfew, he could as well had moved in with him. Most of his stuff laid there anyway. It was the only place he could really relax and feel utterly accepted. It was soothing and his feelings only grew.

When he turned fourteen, their comfort zone shifted dramatically and things went south. He had grown into full adolescence with all its corollary. A few heated fights with schoolmates about Soubi and his relation to him had driven the point home abruptly and painfully. From that moment, even the most casual touch was met by a disproportionate reaction. Soubi never commented his blushes and flare-up. After a time, he simply stopped touching him altogether. Ritsuka had always assumed he had been hurt by his Sacrifice recoiling from him and overlooked the fact that Soubi was perceptive and much more experienced. The older man had simply chosen to let him work it out at his own pace because hurrying the youngster on had never been productive. So he had waited out his Sacrifice, even if he had felt offended.

The turning point was not a happy memory. When Ritsuka finally decided to act upon his feelings, he hadn't met a willing partner. He hadn't considered Soubi would reject his advances. It had stung. No, it had hurt – deeply – and Ritsuka hadn't been able to overcome his broken heart and shame. As for Soubi, too many repressed memories had sprung to mind and he had used the time away from the teen to sort out his own feelings. Months later, Ritsuka still couldn't look him in the eye or talk to him without hearing the ghost of his horrified words echoing in his ears. 'You're 14! I'm not taking your ears! You're 14! You're too young! Why are you so eager to lose them?'

Their friends had worried. They had wondered and asked questions. They had demanded answers when the Loveless pair had grown increasingly distant from one another. They had tried to worm it out of them when they obviously weren't going to confide. They had even ventured uneducated guesses and given unwelcome advices. To no avail. Both were tight-lipped so none ever knew what had happened between them. They became the helpless witnesses of their ever more deteriorating relation. The year wore on, drew to an end and no resolution was met.

For two years, Ritsuka and Soubi only saw each other when a battle was engaged. Their bond had suffered greatly and their string had thinned and dimmed to a dull shimmering but they would still feel the other's need and answer it. Neither of them had ever considered letting the other suffer any harm, no matter how messed up it was between them.

Ritsuka didn't really know what Soubi had done in his spare time during that first year. Soubi who had always yearned for his Sacrifice to give him a direction, an aim, a raison d'être. He certainly had been curious but couldn't bring himself to stay around long enough to ask and enquire about his well-being. And his hands had itched to touch him each time. When he had felt confident enough again, when he had regain some shreds of self-esteem, when he had managed to look at him without reliving Soubi's rejection and his own subsequent shame, they had begun to strengthen their bond again. They would go to a coffee shop after a battle and talk for a little while. But as soon as the conversation lulled down or reached a more personal level, Ritsuka would up and go to return to high school life. He dated a few girls during those two years, fooled around a little but nothing was ever serious. He wasn't interested enough. He even went out with another boy. But he knew deep down, nobody would ever compare. His whole heart, mind and soul were already given and no matter who or when, he would never bestow his ears on anyone else. How ironic. The only person he desired was the only who wasn't willing. The joke hadn't made him laugh in the slightest.

That's how he found himself that sunny afternoon, fist poised in the air before Soubi's door, reflecting how everything went down from the fateful day he had revealed his true feelings and intentions. He was three years older and nothing had changed. He was still head over heels for his Fighter and staying away had only made him more miserable. But he had decided: he was over seventeen and he was going to set the record straight between them.