Title: Ocean of Memories
Chapter: A Place I Don't Want To Go
Rating: Teen -No clue, what exactly will happen.
Based On: Rose, Jack, and a few random characters
Updating: Once a week hopefully.
Editor?: There is no editor. Get over it. Thank you. : )
This Chapter: It's on Rose.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except for the plot, I really wish I owned Jack Dawson though..

Jack did not die in vain.
Jack did not die in vain.
Jack did not die in vain.
Jack did not die in vain.
I repeated it over and over again. Was it really that sad for me to want to go back to them? I would be safe, and warm, and, and, and a puppet. I would be a polite puppet and have everyone do everything for me. Things that I was capable of doing by myself. I would turn out just like my selfish mother. The mother who cared only about herself, her non-existent wealth, and our stature in the publics eyes. She didn't care who I loved or who I hated, she just wanted to make sure that I married a wealthy man and that she would be taken care of for the rest of her spoiled life. I was just a one way ticket into a life she loved and a life I hated. Well, too bad mother, it didn't happen. I doubt Cal will take care of you, he may hand out money like it's nothing, but he has to have a reason, and you're not even a good enough reason.

Maybe Molly Brown and her husband will take care of you. She seemed nice enough. She cared about people, before and after she was rich. She'll take pity on you, maybe you'll learn something about life from her. Maybe you already have learned something from the sinking of the "unsinkable" ship. Oh God, I refuse to even think of going back and be a thoughtless puppet to my mother and especially not to Caledon Hockley.

His name still makes me want to vomit. He was even worse than my mother. All he considered me was as a priceless gem and a show horse that needed to be trained. I was a human being with a mind of my own. I don't like other people taking control of me. It's not exactly a great feeling... Jack died for me to start a new life. He died for me. I will not let his death be in vain. No matter what I have to do. I won't go back, I will go on. He made me promise. Oh God.. Jack. It was only four days ago that you let me fly. It seems like years ago though. WHY THE HELL DID YOU HAVE TO TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME!?!? He was the only person that truly knew me. He believed in me and most importantly, he loved me. "IT'S NOT FAIR!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and took off running down the narrow gangplank and into the unknown vast city of New York. I saw a few people turn their heads at the 'steerage' passenger when I yelled. A few people gasped and I pushed aside quite a few people as I pushed my way forward. I didn't care what they thought of me. It's not like any of them would see me again, and as of right now, I didn't care what anybody though of me, I only cared about what Jack thought of me. And Jack? Jack was dead.

I almost knocked my mother into the bay when I ran by her and Cal. If you could even call her my mother. Ruth deserved to be knocked into the bay though. Of course, I'd have to make sure she was knocked into the part of the bay that was reserved for the first class and wasn't too crowded.. I laughed silently at that one. God mother, you are so selfish. You know what? They don't even deserve to be in my thoughts. I heard Cal, the unimaginable bastard and selfish coward that he is yell at someone to arrest me for almost knocking himself and Ruth into the bay. He's the one who deserved to die, not Jack. Of course, no one paid him any attention. Well, that's probably a first. No one paid attention to Caledon Hockley, I wonder how well he took it.

The Carpathia's crew were trying to keep the reporters away from the survivors, one of the reporters, a man with a small mustache, gray eyes, and a hat yelled at me to stop, actually he had the nerve to run after me and grab my wrist. "Hello Miss!" he told me quite cheerfully, as if greeting survivors of a sinking not three days earlier who had lost everything back in the middle of the North Atlantic was a normal thing for him. "Would you care to tell me what you went through?" "No. Leave me alone." And I walked off. "We can't have that, Get back here!" He grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him. "I said, LEAVE ME ALONE!" I was tired of people trying to pull me back to a place I didn't want to go. I used the one thing that I had left of Jack. I spit on him, and then of course, I punched him.. And ran.