LEGAL ADVISORY
The author of the following FanFiction Presentation claims ABSOLUTELY NO OWNERSHIP in characters, places, names, and the like, that are NOT THE PRODUCT of his imagination. All copyrights are acknowledged.

JACOB ROBERT DAVIS PRESENTS...
"Orbie's Rant! An Alien On Earth"
A "KATIE AND ORBIE" OneShot FanFiction
Written in Apple iCloud Pages using a Point-Of-View style

Given what I am, I fear that the public may not accept me...or at least, that's what I thought. Being an alien from another world, I am pretty new to most of Earth's customs. But, if there is one family who understands me, it would have to be Katie Amadeus's. She was the first person I saw when I wound up crash-landing into her house's front yard, some 20+ years ago.

What great games we would play. Ah, the times we had.

It was just so...well, how would earthlings put it...fun? Yeah, fun.

We saw plays, made pizza, played hide-and seek, and had some of the best pretend adventures one could hope for. As earthlings put it these days, that was the life.

I thought it would last, but it didn't.

With all the changes we had to go through, there must come a time when people have to grow up, and learn their own way. Katie left the house when she turned 21, and needless to say, I was disheartened, as she was my friend, and I hers. I was her only friend from another world. In fact, I was the only evidence of other worlds beyond Earth.

Let me be blunt: I was lucky Area 51 agents didn't take me away from our house in Central City. Good thing, too, because the hot-pink polkadot colour scheme I sported would've frightened those Men In Black! And my tech...don't get me started. My UFO was no different from your normal average Maxima, or even one of those new Focuses they keep coming out with every few months. Speaking of which, I think I had it in the shop once or twice, just for engine trouble. And sometimes, that blasted airlock just wouldn't...lock! What would I do without the built-in life support!? If I was a few lightyears away, and the airlock malfunctioned, boy would I be in for it, and that would have been that! Luckily, they do have repair shops on Venus, probably a few more on Mars and Mercury. But I'd personally recommend the shops on Venus. They'd get me in and out in under an hour, Earth time, mind you, and the sheer attention to detail...wow, just wow...they'd fix anything, and prevent new problems from occurring in my UFO for up to 3 of your Earth years. And, get this...it's road-legal on Earth. Yes, I have a license to drive now. CCDMV had granted a legal exception. I still have yet to get the FAA to approve me for long-range flight. Loads of red-tape.

But, alas, after all that, Katie's memory is still fresh in my mind after all these years. Her parents are getting up there in age, but they're still kicking. As for me, I got a job working for a local radio channel. WCEN 91.0, which was Central City's only talk station, took me in around 2010, and I've been running my own talk show there since. I went national two months later. On the side, I just work as a volunteer mail clerk. My UFO's trunk space is pretty much its own dimension, and if I didn't know any better, I'd say you could fit Andromeda inside there, and still have space left over for Ursa Major, Canis, Orion, and then some! (Don't try to stuff WR104 in there, the cops would rat me out for weapons.) Anyway, intergalactic jokes aside, I could literally fit an entire post office in there, and still have enough room left for Earth and its moon, and that's just a fraction of the total amount of space it holds. It takes me about 3 hours to go my entire mail route, so I can get back to the radio station in time for my show.

As for Katie, we chat on Skype from time to time. (My user ID is Spotted_Pink5151, if you must know.) She talks about her life in college. I just talk about my latest show and how, in some houses, the dogs wind up knocking me down when I so much as open one's mailbox! I even had a time when this big German Shepherd tackled me and sent a package I was supposed to be delivering flying out of my hands, landing in the yard of the house across the street.

It was all good at first, but there was a time when Katie came back to the house. She looked awful, as if she was drunk! She was yammering like crazy! And that was it. I knew Katie was nice at a younger age, but seeing as she's of age to drink these days, wouldn't it hurt her to just drink responsibly? I mean, come on! My body type can handle the stuff and eliminate any problems that may occur, like a hangover deterrent, but hers just couldn't! Well, that left me with no alternative. I had to teleport her to my UFO and strap her to a gurney. I called it an "Experiment." But, it wasn't. I just wanted to see her calm down and sober up. Besides, after being drunk, Katie can get...a little hostile. At least Mom and Dad got the basic gist of my real intentions.

After that...very unfortunate incident, she finally calms down, and eventually passes out. I checked for a pulse, and sure enough, she had one. She just fainted, that's all. She didn't exactly remember what happened when she came to again, but after I told her what happened, boy was she scared, just as much as when she was nine. The restraints were deactivated, and we hugged it out, just like before.

There were more problems where that came from, but we've all had our share of ups and downs. In fact, everyone has. But, my biggest problem was that, seeing as I was initially from another planet, there are times when some people likened me to Superman, one of those fictional comic characters. I hate, no, completely RESENT that remark. Why would anyone compare a real alien to a fake movie alien? And I'm pretty sure I don't wear tights and have those..ugh...laser eyes! YUCK! My kind had done an experiment with laser eyes at one point, and...well, let's just say that at least 50 people wound up without their eyes for a good 3 weeks! We regenerate pretty fast.

Nevertheless, all in all, Katie and myself have been doing pretty well, for the most part. Mom and Dad were very proud of her when they discovered she had been accepted into a national college, as they were of me when I got a job at the local radio station. And I even visit her sometimes. Usually, she's either in her dorm room or attending a sorority meeting.

When I think about it, though, I still remember the times when we were young. All the games and family activities we done. Everything and anything. The galaxy was ours. We felt free.

As earthlings say, however, life goes on.

Only time will tell what will happen next.

AUTHOR'S NOTES
I remember watching Katie and Orbie on the Disney Channel some time ago, and I still have an episode of it recorded on videotape, along with a few other things. These days, many episodes of the programme are available on YouTube for people to watch at their discretion. Now, in searching FFN for Katie and Orbie fanfics, there actually were none to speak of. Given that, this one is the first. If you wish for a re-write of this story, leave a comment.