This story doesn't have much of a plot. It is just written to all competitive swimmers out there. Swimming is one of the most misunderstood sports; it is the second hardest sport after gymnastics, yet most people think it's easy.

I got the idea after thinking about which Hetalia character everyone on team would be. This is just an elaborated tale of us in the locker room everyday after practice. Emphasis on elaborated.

I am a sprinter, but I have nothing against distance swimmers. I really think they work harder than we do. Vanessa has my deepest apologies.

We are more mature than the characters in this story. Be aware because though we don't curse much, Roma does. She isn't very happy in this scene, so she curses more than usual.

It is rated T for language. It can be a little offensive, but I don't believe the langauge is reason enough to rate it M. This story is for 13 and above. If you are 13 and haven't heard this in the hallways of school, you must live under a rock. If you are under 13, read with caution and don't repeat what Roma says.

Important Characters:

Fem! South Italy - Roma

Fem! North Italy - Felicana (Feli)

Hungary - Elisa

Belarus - Natty

Liechtenstein - Lilli

Fem! Sweden - Vanessa

Finland- Tino

Prussia - Gilbert

England - Arthur (Arty)

Germany - Ludwig

USA - Coach Al

"Have a good night, Roma," called my coach. My stupid fucking bastard of a coach who had kept us ten minutes late. Who did he think he was, making us do all that extra kicking? He wouldn't be so cheerful if he had just finished that set.

"See you tomorrow, Al," I sneered, kicking one of the junior's water bottle over and rolling my eyes. The junior in question shot me a death glare for he now had to jump back in the pool.

The fucking pool that was as cold as fuck. Damn, I wasn't even sure if all my fingers were still attached. They had probably fallen off when they had gone numb. Which was the full two hours I was in the water.

Uno, due, tre, quattro, cinque, sei, sette, otto, nove, dieci. Nope, they were all there. There goes my impressive excuse to skip next practice. Oh mom, I lost some fingers. I guess I'll have to wait till they grow back. Which will be never! Ha bitch!

Nope. Athena would never understand me. She really thought I liked this sport. That's only the biggest load of shit I've ever heard. I just couldn't quit because I'd have to give up pizza and pasta and spaghetti and …... yeah, same fucking solution: can't quit swimming.

So I swung my million- fucking-billion pound equipment bag to the side, cursing as the snorkel fell out. Of course, the innocent looking pink death trap didn't already cause enough problems today; it had to make me pick it up. "Breathing bastard," I muttered darkly, wishing I had forgotten it like Elisa and Matt had.

In an even worse mood, I stomped into the locker room. Flinging my stuff onto an open bench, I knocked over someone's stuff. Blue and yellow bag – Vanessa the senior distance swimmer's.

Woah onto Vanessa who just looked at me before stalking into the showers. What did she know about no-breathers and kicking and swimming your ass off – nothing. The blonde girl was a distance swimmer who refused to race anything below a 200; a sure sign of madness.

Grabbing my face wash that stung like a bitch but really worked, I made my way to the showers. Some kid had already turned on the central switch and the warm water was such a relief.

Yes, it was truly heaven.

"I wish my shower at home would get this warm," sighed Lilli, running shampoo through her short blonde hair. "Vash thinks I'll burn if I turn them up this high."

I couldn't help but let out a short laugh. Lilli was a kick-ass swimmer, fourteen and in the senior group, but her father was against the sport. He thought we showed too much skin.

Honestly, had he ever seen our high-tech racing suits. They go to our knees and taking fifteen fucking painful minutes to put on. It's our joke that they are rape proof. No one can get you out of them once your in.

"Ours get this warm," my sister told her, borrowing someone's shampoo. I think it was Natty's because she shot Feli a glare and tossed her conditioner into the corner, behind her bulk. Though, Vanessa also made a move to put her lotions behind herself.

"Except you always steal all the warm water," I told her, spitting water at her. I laughed when she sputtered to get my spit off her face. A small smile graced my face as Elisa and Natty joined in my laughter.

She put her face to the spout and gave me an evil looking grin. Who knew little Feli was even capable of evil looking grins? Not me for sure.

Just then, the water shut off, and Feli spit the water out in shock. Lilli and Vanessa sneakily tried to peek out the showers, but they only succeeded in getting bubbles over the walls.

"What the fuck!" I shouted, scaring the shit out of the little bastards that were getting ready for practice. "Who turned off the water?" I was just starting to warm up and that was a miracle in itself.

"Roma," muttered Lilli, being self-conscious for me. "The white group is in here. You probably shouldn't curse around them. They are young, wirklich."

" I don't give a shit," I told her, storming my way out of the locker room. Whomever turned off the showers was going to get a piece of my mind – a very big piece at that. Bastards; that's what shower-turner-offers were.

Gil was causally leaning against the panel that held the controls for the boy's and girl's locker rooms. He looked delicious in his speedo, and I could eat up those abs but at the moment, he had turned off the fucking showers – the one good thing about swim practice.

"You bastard," I told him, pushing him out of the way. "Turn off your own showers if you want a laugh. I bet Antonio would find it funnier than we do." When I reached for the handle, the creeper grabbed my hand.

"Then I wouldn't get to see you girls come out of the shower." He grinned slyly, but let me turn the handle.

"Go be gay with all your friends," I spat at him. For good measure, I kicked him as hard as I could in the shin. Which, in fact, wasn't very hard because my ankles were aching from all the kick work we did. Though I do like to think he was limping instead of shaking with laughter.

He tousled my wet and chlorine damaged hair before disappearing back into the boy's locker room. Grinning, I realized he had denied nothing about all the boy's being gay.

Telling this to Elisa when stepping back in the showers elicited a whole new train of gossip. We always had a hunch that they fucked or something in the bathrooms. I mean, they take longer than we do to get changed.

All they have to do is slide on pants because most don't even wear shirts. We have to put on sports-bras, which is damn hard when you are damp, and underwear. Never mind trying to find a hair tie. I swear those fucking things hide from me.

"But Francis has a girlfriend," said Lilli, washing her conditioner out of her hair. "and so does Ivan and Arty. Tino is even dating Vanessa."

Vanessa didn't look the least bit disturbed that her boyfriend could possibly be gay. They were … an okay couple. Okay, I'll admit it; they are the cutest thing. I might sound like my sister, but they can have all the swimcest they want.

Unlike Vanessa, Natty blushed red at that. She had the largest crush on Ivan even though that was the uncool kind of swimcest and just plain weird. He was a hottie, but he was like my annoying older brother. That be like dating Vinny ... bleh!

"Come on, cutie," laughed Elisa, exerting her power as the oldest of the senior girls – and the oldest on the team. "You honestly think that Arty, our Arthur, has a girlfriend. Of course, we've never meet her, and she lives in England."

"Straight as my hair," laughed Feli. It would have been funny if my sister thought about where the fuck she was. At swimming, in a shower, with her hair wet; that was the only time when it wasn't ridiculously curly.

Picking up a strand of her hair, greasy with unwashed conditioner, I tugged it in front of her face. "Felicana, this doesn't look very curly."

"Might as well be talking about my hair," said Natty, sliding out of the shower. Her pin-straight blonde hair falling down her back. "I don't know if any of our boys are this straight."

Having a good laugh, I followed her out of the showers. There was only one problem: my flip-flops were over by my bag and a good ten feet away.

"Shit," I muttered, staring in distaste at the floor. It was covered in who knows what. In the corner was a used tampon that might have been a year old. Okay, only a week, but it was still as gross as fuck.

"Want your shoes," called Natty, who was standing on a bench to avoid touching the ground. It swayed slightly but that thing had yet to break on us. If it did, it was all the junior's fault – or Gil's.

Giving the ground the best glare I could, I shouted back to Natty, "Of course I want them, bitch! Throw them over here."

Wrapping a towel around her chest – still covered by her suit, you perverts – she looked at my shoes lying on the ground. "Sorry, Roma," she sighed, now replacing her suit with her bra, "they look a little far away."

"Just bend over an get them, you whore," called Elisa from the showers. "You can't be that tired. You missed half the set because of your shoulder injury."

Tossing my shoes at my head, she threw me the middle finger. Of course, a fucking white kid – not a racist comment, that is her swimming group – decided to walk in. Her mouth hung open, and it looked like she was going to cry.

I do kinda have a habit of making little kids cry, so it wasn't the strangest thing. I just always seem to do stupid things at stupid points. I think it runs in the family – a grave misfortune.

Before she could run to Coach Alfred, Mei, one of the junior girls who just sat in the corner and changed, grabbed her. "Lucy," she whispered to the one kid who could get us in a shit-load of trouble. "You won't tell Coach Alfred about this, will you? Don't you want to have secrets with the senior girls?"

The girl, Lucy, nodded and skipped out of the locker room. Mei looked at us, her towel wrapped around her hair. "Way to be role models to the younger group! You know you can't talk like that."

"Come on," said Lilli, siding with us over her old group. "How was Roma supposed to know that Lucy was going to walk in right then."

"Hold on," I said, walking over to my bag, refusing to look anyone in the face. I had my shoes one – that's an obvious one because I walked somewhere. "It was Natty who gave the middle finger. I didn't do shit."

"Who gives a flipping dolphin about it all," announced Feli, being that last to walk out of the showers. "We've all done a bunch of stupid stuff, but we love each other."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Vanessa shrug her shoulders. Probably thinking about the shit we give her about being a distance swimmer. Yeah, we can be real bitches sometimes.

Lilli tossed an arm around her shoulders and seemed to whisper something that made her smile. Good thing Lilli was nice because I sure as hell couldn't be.

"I lov' y' all," said Vanessa, purposely running a towel through her hair and blocking her mouth with the cloth. So, I showed some kindness because I didn't ask her to repeat what she said.

Did you believe that? Okay, confession time – I was drinking my Gatorade.

"Ain't that the truth," said Elisa. "If I had clothes on, I'd give you all hugs."

"That hasn't stopped you before," I called to her, attempting to untangle my sports-bra all by myself. The thing was too tight. Maybe I had finally grown. Just kidding – it shrunk in the wash.

"And you liked it," she called back, moving to help me untangle myself. "You know you wished you had no clothes on either."

Only after my bra was untangled, I pushed her away. "In your dreams, lesbo," I snapped back at her, trying not to make my voice too accusing.

Turning to face everyone, with Elisa's arms still around my bare stomach, I saw my sister holding up her phone. My face blanched because …. just because; who needs a reason?

"That's one cute pic of you two," grinned my sister. Smiling a shit-eating grin she tossed her phone to Natty who laughed then tossed it to Lilli. The younger girl nearly dropped it into the pigsty – I mean onto the floor.

"That's pornography," she said, angling it so Vanessa could see it. "You can't take pictures in a locker room. How do you delete it, Feli?"

Her face was all scrunched up as she tried to find the right button. Did I mention that her father is an asshole and won't get her a phone? Well, he is – totally.

"Ve," screeched my sister, reaching for her phone. "That's going to be her new facebook profile pic! What are you doing?"

Vanessa being the insanely tall person she is, held the phone above her head. Feli danced around her, tickling up her arms and stomach – she just had her bra and pants on. "Nessy," she said, tugging on the blonde girl's hair. "Pretty please give it to me."

We kinda all waited to see what would happen. Part of me wanted my sister to trip over her own feet and fall on the floor and another wanted Vanessa to delete the photo. Actually, all lies - I wanted both to happen.

"Opps," she said, dropping the phone into my sister's hand. "My f'nger f'll on 'ne of th' keys. I don't th'nk the p'cs there any m're."

"No," she screamed, holding her phone in her hand like it was dead animal. What the fuck? It was just a picture, not the lizard that I accidentally ran over.

It got really awkward when Feli stopped screaming. You could actually hear the boys in their locker room. I don't know if we've ever been quiet enough to hear them before.

"My Vanessa's really pretty," said one of the boys. Hopefully Tino but you can never really tell with them. "Especially all pink after doing twenty 100s."

Chirp, chirp, chirp went the imaginary crickets. Yeah, it was that fuckin' quiet. Very weird.

"So," said Vanessa, finally getting embarrassed. "Any'ne d'ing anyth'ng for the week'nd."

"Girl," I told her, nearly embarrassed as she was. Fuck awkward situations for making me feel awkward. "We've got a fucking meet. Do ya really think any of us have time to do shit. I'll be lucky if I can do my Physics homework."

Lilli sighed at this, starting to pack up her bag. "Do any of you know anything about lizards that live in Mexico?"

"Come on, Beast," said Natty. She had coined the name 'Beast' for the tiny but amazing swimmer. "Do we look like the kind of people that research random lizards for fun. I've got a lot better stuff to do in my time."

Apparently recovered, Feli started laughing. "Where do you get this time? I'm doing homework or eating whenever I'm not sleeping or swimming. Ve~ It's so tiring."

"Well, you guys are no help. See you tomorrow then."

Now Lili probably thinks my sister is an idiot. Way to sound like a genius, Feli. Eat, sleep, swim: where did you possibly come up with that?

Elisa called out to Lilli to wait as she slung her own bag over her shoulder. "It's less then twelve hours, y'll. O' joyous early morning practices. Be there or be square."

"No one says that anymore," laughed Natty. "Elisabeth Hettary is here with flashback sayings that makes one look like a wacko."

Flashing a smile, she bowed. Her bag nearly fell over her shoulders and her gorgeous brown hair nearly touching the ground – yes I'm jealous of her hair, but that's unimportant. "What can I say, I'm just so old and wise," Elisa announced to us.

"Get out a' here," giggled Natty, trying to put her shoes on while standing up. "We are basically the same age. And bitch," she said very seriously, pausing for emphasis, " the saying is 'see you later, alligator'."

With a final choppy wave, the two of them slipped out of the locker room. Vanessa grunted in annoyance and/or laughter and followed them. Was hard to tell with that girl.

"Damn," muttered Natty, laying on the bench and sliding on her shoes. That bitch was taking up the whole length, so I pushed her off my make room for my ass. "It's only ten hours. Got to get home to get some of that wonderful sleep."

"Have fun dreaming of Ivan."

"Shut it, Feli," shouted Natty, getting red all over again. "If you weren't the anchor in my champ relay, you'd be getting it right now." With a humph, she stomped out of the locker room, swinging her bag haphazardly on her back.

"Better calm your tits," I shouted to her, wincing as I heard Ivan's deep voice walking out of the boy's locker room. Maybe I should stay in here 'cause I didn't have a relay to protect me.

I did get a nice middle finger directed my way. I sent one right back though she probably couldn't see with her eyes checking Ivan out. Yeah, that's right Natty, I said it.

"Sis," said Feli when she realized we were the only one's left in the locker room. "Why are the two of us always so slow?"

I slumped over the bench. My bag was packed, my clothes were on, I was completely ready to go. Where the fuck did she get this we from? When I told her so, she rushed to get dressed.

The little idiot put her shoes on backwards and insisted on walking out of the locker room like that. Really, some common sense please. I might be lacking in that department, but I have more than that.

As I opened the door leading out of the pool, one of the college coaches back on spring break stopped her. Ludwig, I think his name was. Shitty German name.

"Felicana," he said, his funny accent showing. "You know your shoes are on the wrong feet. That can really damage your balance and ankles. They aren't like fins."

Before she could thank him for his wonderful insight, I pulled her out of the pool area. Pouting, she followed me outside to our car.

I hated how she moved to follow his advice before she even listened to mine. It was me who was always there; why the hell did Mr. Ludwig get the acknowledgment? I was the swimmer that had gotten her started and made her one of the best breaststrokers. Grrr...

"Why didn't you let me talk to him?"

"He's a fucking German college swimmer who used to swim with Alfred. He's not to be trusted. Throw your stuff in the trunk and let's go."

Why did I have to explain myself to her. She should know better to talk to kids like him. Didn't Elisa teach her that when she briefly dated Roddy last year. Come on, little sis.

"I've had a rough day," I said to her when she looked at me with her huge golden brown eyes. "I just don't want you to get hurt."

"I love you too," she said, throwing herself around me.

Untangling myself from her, I pushed her into the passenger seat. "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

Hehehehe. Hoped you liked the silliest and least serious story I've ever written. It was kind of fun, but I really like my stories that question a characters beginnings and thought. Read "Unveiled" if that is the kind of story you like.

Next, I want to do a big one shot on Hungary's life. Yes, that's a big undertaking.

If you want to know, Lilli in this scene is based on me. I am the youngest swimmer in the senior group, and I am pretty good. Well, I'm the best girl on the team - if I get rid of my modesty.