Sugar high in Canada.
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
DragonPiper: This is my 2nd fic, sorry if it took a long time to post but, *whispers* I think my inspiration has been avoiding me. It was hiding out in Canada, but I sent Seto up to fetch it! ^-^
Seto: Yeah, straight into a BLIZZARD!!!!
DragonPiper: Oh Seto, stop being so melodramatic!
Seto: I'm not being melodramatic! You did send me into a blizzard!
DragonPiper: Heh, Heh. I mean, just a little one. *Retorts* besides you didn't find it!
Seto: *yelling* How was I supposed to? I was in a freaking BLIZZARD!!!!
(DragonPiper and Seto continue to argue so Ryou and Yugi take over.)
Ryou: *whispers to Yugi* what are we supposed to say?
Yugi: *confused* I don't know. *cheerful* I'll ask Yami, he'll know!
Yugi: *yells offstage loud enough to break windows* Yami!!! Yami!!!! YAMI!!!! Where did he go?
Ryou: I don't know.*a pause then, pales* I just remembered!
Yugi: *concerned* what?
Ryou: *shifts uncomfortably* I was looking for my ring and I asked your yami and mine to help.
Yugi: So? *Suspicious tone in his voice*
Ryou: Well, Yami said he wouldn't help if he didn't get paid, but I was all out of cash, and all I had with me at the moment was..
Yugi: *eyes widen* Ryou tell me that you didn't give Yami sugar.
Ryou: Well I was out of cash and that was all I had! Besides, he found my ring! *Hugs it then adopts a thoughtful tone* But then he and my yami ran to Canada on a sugar high and I haven't seen them since..
(DragonPiper and Seto make a truce and decide that next time they'll send Pegasus. They walk over late enough to see Yugi chasing Ryou all over the stage and screaming death threats at him.)
DragonPiper: *grabs Ryou by the arm as he runs by* Hey, why is Yugi chasing you?
(Seto grabs Yugi by the back of his collar as he lunges at Ryou.)
Ryou: *realizes that Yugi can no longer catch him, because now DragonPiper and Seto are here, sighs* Sigh! *Then suddenly realizes that this is DragonPiper and Seto we are talking about* Uh. nothing!
Yugi: *shouts* HE'S LYING!!!!! HE GAVE YAMI SUGAR!!!!!!
Seto: *lets go of Yugi's collar* you did WHAT?
Ryou: Hey, don't worry! I only gave him 2 gummi bears.
Seto: *ranting* HOW COULD YOU GIVE YAMI-- *calming down* Oh. Only two? (Ryou nods vigorously; While DragonPiper is still holding his arm) Well, we shouldn't have to worry then, 2 gummi bears won't last long even for Yami.
DragonPiper: *suddenly lets go of Ryou's arm, coughs and looks at the ceiling* Um. guys.. Ryou wasn't the only one who gave Yami sugar.
Ryou, Yugi, Seto: *in unison* WHAT?
DragonPiper: * coughs* Well, I couldn't find my inspiration. and you all know Yami doesn't work for free.
Yugi: So, exactly how much sugar are we talking about here? A pixi stix or two?
DragonPiper: *nervously* Um, not exactly. *looks out a window* Try 6 boxes of Pocky.. Uh, Heh, Heh
(This statement is greeted by silence)
DragonPiper: Uh, guys? *Turns around to find all three boys in a dead faint* Oops!
In Canada:
Yami: Well, George I think we are safe here.
Inspiration: My name's not George.
Yami: *confused* It's not? Oh, it must be the sugar that Ryou gave me.
Yami Bakura: Lucky. my own light wouldn't give me any. *sniffles* and I'm his YAMI!!!!!
Yami: Well, I have an explanation! A wonderful one!
Yami Bakura: *pouts* so, what's this great explanation?
Yami: 4 words: You suck. I don't.
Yami Bakura: WHAT? Why you little ******* (censored)
Yami: *scolding* Yami Bakura! We are trying to keep this fic PG!!!!!! Now say you're sorry.
Yami Bakura: *looks at Yami* I'm sorry Yami. *Turns to DragonPiper's Inspiration* I'm sorry George.
Inspiration: My name's not George!!!!!
Yami Bakura: *confused* It's not? Oh. Must be the sugar Ryou gave me..
Yami: *confused* Ryou didn't give you any sugar.
Yami Bakura: *laughs* Oh, yeah! *Then remembers why Ryou didn't give him any sugar and begins to cry*
Yami: *suddenly concerned* Yami Bakura, why are you crying?
Yami Bakura: *in a high tone of voice* I can't catch my shadow!
Yami: *confused* Yami Bakura, your shadow is still on the ground where it has been all your life.
Yami Bakura: Oh. *Suddenly excited* Why don't you come back to Never Neverland with me, Wendy?
Yami: *looks around* who are you talking to? There is no Wendy here.
Yami Bakura: *confused* Yes, there is. You are standing right in front of me Wendy!
Yami: You think I am Wendy? *Laughs* No, I'm Yami Yugi, remember? The Egyptian Pharaoh who's Millennium Puzzle you tried to steal, Yami Bakura.
Yami Bakura: *really confused* Yami Bakura? Who's Yami Bakura? I'm Peter Pan. I don't know who Yami Bakura is.
Yami: *stern voice* you are NOT Peter Pan, *quietly* who ever that is, you are Yami Bakura, an Egyptian Tomb Raider.
Yami Bakura: *points to himself* No, I'm Peter Pan, *points to Yami* you are Wendy, and that, *points to DragonPiper's Inspiration* is Little John. *giggles*
Yami: *screams* ARRGHHHH!!!!!! NOOOOO!!!!! Yami Bakura is now on a Sugar deprivation, and thinks he's PETER PAN!!!!!!!!! Oh the HORROR!!!!!
Yami Bakura: * to DragonPiper's Inspiration, while Yami is still yelling* Where is your teddy bear Little John? I thought you never went anywhere without it.
Inspiration: *exasperated* I'm not Little John or George or anything else you will call me in the future, I'm DragonPiper's Inspiration!
Yami Bakura: *comforting* Denial is to be expected.
Inspiration: *outraged* I'm not in denial!!!!
(Yami finally gets control over his shock and starts to listen to Yami Bakura and DragonPiper's Inspiration bicker of whether or not Inspiration, was in denial about being Little John.)
Yami: *digs out a conveniently placed cell phone and calls Yugi.*
Back Onstage:
On the stage DragonPiper is contemplating on what to do with the three unconscious boys when a pocket in Yugi jacket begins to vibrate. (Yugi's phone vibrates when it rings. FYI! ) Yugi is still unconscious so DragonPiper answers.
DragonPiper: Hello? This is Yugi's cell phone, may I ask who is calling?
On the other line: Yami is so glad that someone answered that he almost forgets why he was calling.
Yami: *frantic* Hello? Where is Yugi? I need to talk to him.
DragonPiper: Uh. Yugi is um. detained at the moment can I take a message?
Yami: *suspicious tone* who is this?
DragonPiper: *simply* DragonPiper. Who is this?
Yami: Yami, Oh good I need to get a helicopter up here right away!
DragonPiper: Why?
Yami: Because Yami Bakura is now on a sugar deprivation, and thinks he's Peter Pan, or something like that.
DragonPiper: Sugar deprivation? Well that is serious! I'll get Seto up, and get a helicopter up there pronto! By the way, where are you guys anyway?
Yami: We're in Canada, with Yami Bakura and George. *DragonPiper hears a voice in the background say," My name is not GEORGE!!!!!!!"*
DragonPiper: I think that's my Inspiration!
Yami: *confused* Your Inspiration? No Inspiration here. Just us two yamis and Good ol' George. *From the background once again: MY NAME IS NOT GEORGE!!!!!!!*
DragonPiper: *to herself* Yep that's my Inspiration! *to Yami* Okay Yami, I'll get the helicopter, and you make sure that all three of you get on the helicopter, no matter WHAT! Okay?
Yami: Ok. *hangs up*
(DragonPiper hangs up, goes over to Seto and roughly shakes him out of unconsciousness.)
Seto: *still half-asleep* Just another hour okay Mokuba?
DragonPiper: Mokuba wakes you up, Seto?
Seto: *waking up* Huh?
DragonPiper: Nevermind. Seto, we need to send a helicopter to fly to Canada and pick up Yami, a delusional Yami Bakura, and my Inspiration.
Seto: *fully awake* From Canada? Uh, I don't know..
DragonPiper: Seto, if you say no, I will set an angry cat on you again!!!
Seto: *winces at the memory* Ok, ok! Here, call this number, and tell the pilot to pick them up.
DragonPiper: *hugs him* Thank you, Seto! ^-^
Seto: *gets up and starts to leave* you're welcome.
DragonPiper: *calls* Oh, Seto! I forgot I need you to go get a few packages of candy.
Seto: Fine, whatever.
In Canada:
Yami: *to Yami Bakura and Inspiration* Okay, guys there is a helicopter coming to pick us up. Remember we are in Canada so it could take hours for it to get he-
(All of the sudden the helicopter lands on the ground, in the middle of Yami's sentence.)
Yami Bakura: *stares at the helicopter in absolute terror* AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *stumbles , gets up and starts running shouting:* they found us!!!! Get the files Andrea! Get the FLIES!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Yami: Are you Ok, Yami Bakura?
(Yami Bakura, was running around in circles shouting, then he ran into a wall, fell down and apparently was dazed. Yami took this opportunity to drag Yami Bakura and DragonPiper's Inspiration on the helicopter.)
About 2 minutes into the ride, Yami Bakura seemed to finally become aware of his surroundings and curled up into a ball, rocked back and forth, and started to mutter: "The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me.." And when Yami dared to give him a weird look Yami Bakura pointed at Yami, and screamed:" THE ELVES ARE GONNA GET YOU!!!!!!" Then he went back to chanting: "The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me..."
About 2 hours later, with Yami Bakura still chanting, They landed outside the stage area and the first thing they see is a DDR (Dance, Dance, Revolution) station outside the Stage Door and standing next to it was Frodo? DragonPiper and the three boys step out and stare at Frodo.
Seto: *whispers to Ryou, with a package of Pocky in each hand* since when is Frodo in this fic? I thought he was in LOTR. (Lord of the Rings)
Ryou: That's what I thought.
Frodo: *to the delusional Yami Bakura* so it was YOU who called the elves! You cannot call the elves!
Yami Bakura : Why not?
Frodo: Only I can call the elves!!!! *he said this like it was the most obvious thing in the entire cosmos *
Yami Bakura: Why? *Frodo looked like he was about to explode*
Frodo: I told you! ONLY I CAN CALL THE ELVES!!!!!!!
Yami Bakura: Why?
Frodo: Because YOU aren't in LOTR! Duh!
Yami Bakura: So?
Frodo: *searching for a good retort* Uh, because I said so!
Yami Bakura: So?
Frodo: *stuttering* Uh, Um..well..
Yami: *interrupts Frodo's stuttering* Oh! BURN!!! *then broke into hysterics* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
Everyone: *backs away from Yami*
Yami: *confused* what?
Frodo: *suddenly sees the rest of the cast (aka: Ryou, DragonPiper's Inspiration, Yugi, Yami, DragonPiper, and lastly Seto.) and sees Seto holding the 2 packages of Pocky and his eyes bulge* YOU!!!!
Seto: *looks around wildly* me?
Frodo: *enraged, accusingly* YOU took my POCKY!!!!!! Pocky Stealer!!!!!!
Seto: *utterly confused* what? I bought these at the candy store like DragonPiper told me to.
Frodo: NO!!!! They are mine!!!
Yami Bakura: *heroic* As Peter Pan I will not let Seto Kaiba take these indignities!!! I challenge you Captain Hook, to a.. *dramatic pause* Drum roll please * this was directed to the skies, Yami said: "Yami Bakura the skies can't give a drum ro-" , then the skies gave a dramatic drum roll.* DDR DUEL!!!!! *looks very smug*
Seto: *to Yami, who had come over to the stage area* Yami Bakura is standing up for me? Should I be worried?
Yami: I wouldn't worry, remember, he thinks he's Peter Pan.
Seto: Who?
DragonPiper: You don't know who Peter Pan is? *Seto shakes head, says with pride* He is the greatest cartoon hero of all time! *falters* At least that is what my little sister tells me..
Yami Bakura: *to Frodo* Do you have the courage to accept my challenge? Do you have the Magic Flying Pancake of AliBaba?
Frodo: *stares at Yami Bakura in disbelief, who had adopted a heroic pose*
Yami Bakura: *accusingly* Well? DO YOU?
All: O.o What?
Yami Bakura: I knew you weren't brave enough to challenge the Almighty: PETER PAN!!!!!!!
Frodo: *Only hears the part about not being brave enough* what? Me? Not brave enough? Ha!
Yugi: Why is Frodo talking like a guy from the medieval times?
Frodo: *to Yami Bakura in a weird accent* I accept your challenge, but only to reclaim the Pocky that is rightfully MINE! Prepare to lose you recant DDRer!
Everyone Else: DDRer?
Frodo: *dignified pose* Yes! DDRer!!!!! DUN DUN DUN!!
Yami Bakura: *to Frodo* Nay, it is thee who will be the loser, Captain HOOK!!!!!
Frodo: Surely you jest!
Yami Bakura: Nay! Surely it is YOU who jests!
Frodo: No, surely you jest!
Yami Bakura: *turns red with fury* No! It IS YOU who jests!
Frodo: *looks insulted, although he very well may have been, hard to tell* No! You!
Yami Bakura: *looks outraged* No! You!!
Frodo: *yells* No! You!!!
Yami Bakura: *yells at the top of his lungs* No! You!!!!
Frodo: *screams* you!
Yami Bakura: *screams at the highest possible chord* YOU!!!!!!!!
Frodo: *pouts* Fine. It was I who jested. *points at Yami Bakura* But I will still defeat you, you undignified pile of horse *points at Yami Bakura, but then falters* .um.we are keeping this fic PG, right? *looks at DragonPiper, who nods* .radish!
Yami Bakura: *walks over to DDR station* Bring it on thou craven varlet!!
Frodo: Fine, but what's a "craven varlet"?
DragonPiper: You don't want to know! (She was the only one who understood what Yami Bakura had said, so she shot him a grin.)
Yami Bakura: *Yami Bakura and Frodo step onto the DDR* Oh! Oh! Can I choose the song?
Frodo: Fine, whatever.
Yami Bakura: Yay! Okay here is my song *he pushed a button on the DDR consul*
Yami: What song? (but Yami Bakura needn't answer for, well I think once you see it, it will be self-explanatory. But the song started at Yami Bakura and Frodo stated dancing. The duel was on!)
Oh, yeah, in case you were wondering here are the words to Yami Bakura's song: It's called: The Pirates who don't do anything. (Techno version)
"Ar, Ar, Ar, Ar! We are the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything, We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
Well I've never been to Greenland, And I've never been to Denver, And I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul, And I've never been to Moscow, And I've never been to Tampa, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
'Cause, we're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
And I've never hoist the main stay, And I've never swabbed the poopdeck, And I never faired the starboard, 'Cause I've never sail at all, And I've never walked the Gangplank, And I've never owned a parrot, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
'Cause, we're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
Oh, I've never plucked a rooster, And I'm not too good at ping-pong, And I've never thrown my mashed potaters up against the wall, And I've never kissed a chipmunk, And I've never gotten Head-lice, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
Pirate Captain Flove, 2002, Who be this man we found in cage, And why they be so full of contradiction?
We don't know what he did, But we're tellin' Captain Kidd. We don't wake up before lunch, But we all eat Captain Crunch! We don't smoke we don't chew, We watch Captain Kangaroo!
And I've never licked a sparkplug, And I've never sniffed a stinkbug, And I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball, And I've never bathed in yogurt, And I don't look good in leggings, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
We are the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
We are the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything!"
( Well after all the music was finished both Yami Bakura and Frodo were panting heavily for breath. After about a 1-minute and a ½ The DDR screen flashed the words: "DDR duel outcomes loading.." Everyone watched as the screen flashed again, but then shorted out. Two last words blinked on the screen before it blacked out: System Failure.)
Yami Bakura: *screaming at the top of his lungs while shaking the DDR machine* YOU STUPID MACHINE!!!!!! YOU KNOW I WON BUT JUST DON'T WANT TO ADMIT THAT I AM THE BEST!!!!!!
Frodo: *just stares at Yami Bakura's sudden outburst* blink, blink..
Yami Bakura: *runs over to Seto, who is still numb with shock over Yami Bakura's outburst, and grabs the Pocky from him* Ha! I won! I always win for I am Peter Pan!! I get the best candy in the world, POCK- (Suddenly with a puff of plaid smoke, OoshatiElf appeared, ran up to a stunned Yami Bakura, grabs the Pocky from his outstretched hands and yelled, " Ha! I win!")
Yami Bakura: Hold on a sec! Those are MINE!!! *tries to grab them*
OoshatiElf: *snatches them away , and bares fangs* No! MINES!!!!! *then points* HA! *and disappears with a squish into the plaid colored smoke*
Yami Bakura: *to DragonPiper* your sister stole my CANDY!!!!!
DragonPiper: *shrugs* what can I say? She's a Pocky-addict.
Yami Bakura: *sniffles* But I won them fair and square! *begins to tear up*
OoshatiElf: *suddenly appears with the plaid cloud of smoke, hands Yami Bakura a Pocky stick, pats him on the head* There you go Yami Bakura. Have Fun! *disappears in a flash of plaid*
Yami Bakura: *eyes light up* Ohhhhh..Yay!!!! Thank you OoshatiElf!!!! I lovededs yoooouuuu!!!!
DragonPiper: *pouts*
Yami Bakura: *stuffs whole stick in his mouth, and gobbles it down*
Yami: Do you know who you are now?
Yami Bakura: Of course! I'm Yami Bakura, a Egyptian Tomb Raider, who constantly tries to steal your Millennium Puzzle. Exactly as you specified.
Yami: *shocked* When did I say that?
Yami Bakura: Oh, back on page 5 when I believed myself to be the fictional character, Peter Pan.
Yami: Oh,. yeah.
Inspiration: *whispers to Ryou* since when does Yami Bakura had that big of a vocabulary?
Yami Bakura: *to Inspiration* since when are you so full of incomprehensible contradiction?
DragonPiper: *cheers* you, tell them Yami Bakura!! *gives an encouraging smile* they are being tenacious aren't they? I don't see what is so ambiguous about an expansive vocabulary. *raises right hand* Yami Bakura, I assure you, that I find nothing perplexing about your contemporary quandary.
Yami Bakura: *sighs* Finally someone who understands! *hugs DragonPiper, who smiles* Thank you for being able to carry on intellectual dialogue!
Everyone but DragonPiper, Yami Bakura: O.o
Yami Bakura: I propose that we adjourn the provisional meeting, and establish it once again within the walls of the stage vicinity.
DragonPiper: I couldn't have prompted that any more intellectually. *gestures towards the door, starts to walk to the door then turns back to the rest of the cast* Are you guys coming?
Everyone: O.o
DragonPiper: Will stop staring at me like that? It's really exasperating! What? Didn't think I could carry on an intelligent conversation? Well, if THAT was what you thought, you will need a time out. *turns to face them, with Yami Bakura standing next to her* Now, what chastisement should I give you? *Yami Bakura whispers in her ear, her face lights up* Ohhhhh! That's a good one!! *smiles at everyone else (including Frodo) with a maniacal grin* Well, Yami Bakura has prompted the best castigation for your current dilemma. *holds up hand, and snaps her fingers, they are instantly transported to a white room with a large 60" screen, chairs that are melted into the floor with chains and things to keep your eyes open.*
Yami: How did you that?
DragonPiper: *about to answer when Yami Bakura interrupts*
Yami Bakura: *to DragonPiper* I think I can clarify this if you don't mind.
DragonPiper: Go ahead.
Yami Bakura: *to everyone* you, see we are in a alternate dimension when the Authoress *points to DragonPiper* has almighty powers, so the entire universe is, to put it simply, her 's to bend.
DragonPiper: Very good. I think that is it.
Yami, Seto, Yugi, Frodo, Inspiration, Ryou: *are now inspecting the TV*
DragonPiper: Okay that's enough! Now sit down in the chair that specifies your name.
Everyone: *does*
Yami: Why doesn't Yami Bakura have to be punished?
DragonPiper: Well, Yami Bakura didn't contradict my intellectual capabilities , now did he? *snaps her fingers again, the chains strap everyone down* There.
Seto: *struggling against his bonds* Hey! You can't do this!
DragonPiper: Actually, I can. Were you listening to Yami Bakura's explanation? *Everyone nods* I can do this because I have awesome Authoress powers. *turns to leave* Oh, yes. If you try to go to sleep or just keep your eyes shut the machine will be forced to prop them open.
Yugi: So what are we watching?
DragonPiper: *evil grin* Oh, I won't spoil it. But I will tell you that you WON'T enjoy it!
Everyone: *stares at her in horror*
Seto: *pieces it together* DragonPiper! I'm sorry! You can't make us watch that! I'm really, really sorry!!!!
Yami: Why? what are we watching?
DragonPiper: I'm sorry everyone, but when I feel that you personally are seriously sorry I will stop the movie and let you out, then restart the movie until you are all out. Well I hope this will only moderately horrify you.. Bye. *walks out with Yami Bakura directly behind*
Seto: *the minute the door closes he starts to hyperventilate, and look from side to side*
Yami: *seriously concerned* Seto? Are you okay? What are we-(but he needn't say anything for the movie was beginning, and the title of the movie was: Barney the Purple Dinosaur, Re-runs.)
Everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!
DragonPiper: *about 2 seconds into the theme song, the movie pauses, comes in lets Seto out, who hugs her and they walk out then close the door, the movie starts*
Movie: "I love you, you love me let get together and be one big fam-ily.."
Everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ryou, Yugi: *furiously struggling, then eye's light up, they look at each other then they lower their heads*
DragonPiper: *comes in pauses the movie snaps fingers lets Ryou and Yugi, who start stuttering apologies out, then begins the movie again*
Yami: *screams* this is the worst torture EVER!!!! *thinks* I'm sorry! I really am! *hears DragonPiper* Yami are you sure you REALLY are sorry and don't just wanna get out?
Yami: I didn't ever doubt your "intellectual capabilities" I just didn't understand the words, so I stared. *waits but hears no response from DragonPiper* Hello? Where did you go?
DragonPiper: *comes in pauses movie undoes Yami's chains, restarts the movie, gets ready to leave then turns around and unchains Inspiration, then leaves*
In another room with Ryou, Yugi, Yami Bakura, Seto, are all playing cards.
DragonPiper: *sits down, shuffles deck*
Inspiration: *sits down in an empty chair* Deal me in.
Yami: *stares as DragonPiper deals everyone in* isn't Frodo sorry yet?
DragonPiper: Oh, yes. He was sorry before he stepped into that room.
Yami: So, are you gonna let him out?
DragonPiper: He IS out.
Yami: He is?!
DragonPiper: Yeah. After we left, I transported him back to Middle Earth. Besides I never liked him very much, so I made him watch it.. You playing Yami?
Yami: *sits* Yeah. What are we playing?
DragonPiper: *is about to answer when, Yami Bakura interrupts*
Yami Bakura: Ohh! Ohh! Can I choose the game? *jumps up and down in seat*
DragonPiper: Sure, why not?
Yami Bakura: Okay..*thinks* we're gonna play Oh Hell!
DragonPiper: Yes! I love that game! Even though I'm not very good *punches the air, then looks around* Oh yeah, does everyone know how to play?
Everyone: Yep.
Yami: I bet I can beat everyone at this card game!
Yami Bakura: I bet you can't. I bet that either DragonPiper or I will beat you.
Yami: Fine! I bet $50 bucks I win!
Yami Bakura: Fine, I will bet $50 also, but if it is a draw between DragonPiper and I then you have to pay us $50 bucks EACH.
Yami: Deal *they shake hands*
15 minutes later, Ryou is reading off the scores.
Ryou: *reads off the score sheet*
Yami Bakura, 87
DragonPiper, 87
Seto, 76
Inspiration, 75
Me, 75
Yugi, 53
Yami, -21.
Yami Bakura: Yeah! You owe us $100 bucks!!! Ha!
Yami: How, could I lose? I'm the King of Games!!!
DragonPiper: It's okay Yami. You can't win everything.
Yami: But.. I'm the King of Games!!!
DragonPiper: Get over it Yami.
Yami: I'm the King of Games!!!
DragonPiper: Put a sock in it. *pulls out a sock and stuffs it in Yami's mouth* There.
Seto: *laughing manically* Ha! Even I beat you!!! Ha! You LOST!!!!
Yami: *spits out sock, raises hand to his Puzzle and the little eye thingy on his head starts to glow* that's it Kaiba!!! Beat this!!!! *yells a word that is incomprehensible, and the room turns to negatives, y'know when Yami does the Mind Crush thing, then there is a huge cloud if smoke where Seto was sitting*
(The smoke starts to clear)
DragonPiper: Seto! No! *to Yami* YOU!!!!! You turned Seto into a CHIBI!!!!!!!! *starts to strangle Yami* YOU TURNED SETO INTO A CHIBI!!!!!!!!!!! CHANGE HIM BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: *chokes* someone... Get. Her. Off...Me...
Yugi: *reluctantly, pulls DragonPiper off of Yami, who tries to catch his breath, while Seto is blinking into the bright light*
DragonPiper: *screaming at the top of her lungs* CHANGE SETO BACK TO NORMAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ryou: Calm down DragonPiper. Yami will restore Seto, won't you Yami?
Yami: *shifts uncomfortably* Well, ya see that's the problem.
DragonPiper: *seething* what's the problem?!
Yami: Well, I was actually trying to Mind Crush him, not turn him into a chibi, so I don't know how to change him back.
Everyone, but Seto and Yami: WHAT?!
Yami: But, I can try!
DragonPiper: Fine. Just change him back. Picks Seto up and sets him on the table*
Seto: *to Yami* Hi! I Seto Kaiba! *waves* who you?
Yami: Uh.. Hi. I'm Yami, now hold still. Lemme try to get this right. Hmmm... *screws up his face then, yells another incomprehensible word and more smoke appears, then they hear double giggles*
Seto: * the smoke clears and they saw not 1 chibi Seto but 2 giggling Chibi Setos*
Seto 1: Hi! I Seto! Who you?
Yami: Oh, boy..
Seto 2: Gee, that's an odd name: " Oh Boy"
Seto 1: Yeah, Hmmmm..
Seto 2: * to DragonPiper* Hi! I Kaiba! Who you?
DragonPiper: GAAAHHHHHH!!!! Yami! You CLONED HIM!!!!!!!
Yami: Uh.. Let me try just once more!
DragonPiper: Fine! Just get it right this time!
Yami: OK. * the eye glows on his head he yells another word, that sounds like "Dragon Ball Z" , the room goes to negatives, and there is more smoke*
Yugi: Geez, Yami... What is it with the smoke and the negatives?
Yami: *smoke is still heavy* I like the way the special effects look.
*smoke clears, and everyone sees Trunks from Dragon Ball Z. Trunks is Vegita's son*
Trunks: *apparently dazed, sits up looks around* Huh? What am I doing here? *suddenly terrified* is this some trick by Buu?
OoshatiElf: *appears in her cloud of plaid smoke, glomps Trunks and then disappears into her cloud*
Trunks: What was that?!?!?! O_o;;;;;;
DragonPiper: *to Trunks* I'm sorry you're her favorite character..
OoshatiElf: *re-appears, talks with serious tone* Trunks. I am going to give you the secret on how to defeat Buu.
Trunks: *Steps forward* Yes?!
OoshatiElf: *Glomps* Sorry.couldn't control myself. the secret is.*dramatic music starts playing* Dun..dun..dun.. Is to poke him with a demonic Spork! *Brandishes blue spork* poke him with this and all your troubles will go away with the sound of bagpipes.and if you poke him and hear no bagpipes.then you are screwed. Bye!!! *Glomps and huggles him again.* I give you smoochies! *Smooches him* ^______^ *disappears is a cloud of plaid smoke with the sounds of bells. *
Trunks: She took the Spork with her!!! ^^;;;;
OoshatiElf: Heheheh.sorry about that.here *Gives him the Spork. * *Doesn't disappear, but walks to a pancake and hops on.* Come on, Legolas..
DragonPiper: Since when is Legolas in this fic?
OoshatiElf: Since I said so.I am the older Authoress.so my powers are stronger than yours. HA! Come on Leggy-chan!
Legolas: Coming!
DragonPiper: *goggles* Wow he is one hot mama!!! *looks disgruntled, while in astonishment* Since when did I say stuff like that?!
OoshatiElf: Since I have more Authoress powers!! Hahahahaha! I win. Oh yes.*jumps off pancake* Here Yami Bakura. *Gives him another piece of Pocky* and do you want me to change Seto back to normal? Or I could not.hmm.do I really want him to be back to normal.but then again.I have a diabolical plan to steal his trench coat.and his shoes..they are not as cool as Spike's.he is from Cowboy Bebop, my naive little sister who can't watch Adult Swim. *maniacal laughter* MUWhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha!!! *stops laughing when She realizes everyone is looking at her weird.* Erm.moving on.what is your decision?
DragonPiper: YOU CAN'T HAVE HIS TRENCHCOAT!!!
OoshatiElf: Piffle. Can I have his shoes? DragonPiper: You want his shoes? Why?
OoshatiElf: I want his shoes because I can't have Spike's shoes.and plus you almost never see his shoes.so he can't need them that much.right? Or I could just take Yami Yugi's shoes.even though they look like they are attached to his outfit.are they? Let's have me check it out! *Runs at Yami Yugi* Let me see your shoes!!!
Yami: GHAHHHH!!!!! You get away from my beauteous shoes, you side-show freak!!!!
DragonPiper: Hey! Yami, you need to apologize! *to OoshatiElf* You can have Yami's shoes.
Yami: What?!
DragonPiper: Oh Yami, get over it! You have 3 closets full of shoes for Heaven's sake!!
Yami: So?
OoshatiElf: YEAH! Let me have your shoes!! I likey them!! Me likes! Plus I stole your other shoes! Mwhaha! And I hope that you don't think that the insult that you threw at me was insulting me..because I am a freak!!! *Deranged look on her face* I shall rule the world! And take South America for all the drug money!! And with that I shall buy InuYasha and Mobile suit: Gundam Wing manga!! Bwhahahahaha! And I might buy glue. I don't know. *leaps at Yami's feet.* Gimme the shoes!!!
DragonPiper: I thought that South America was for Robbie...
OoshatiElf: *looks up from Yami's feet* Oh yes.it was.but I'll give him all the drug money after I spend around 400 bucks, and you know how much drugs cost.well actually I don't because I don't use them.but Anime: Drugs would be cheaper. Hmm.that really doesn't help my argument. I guess that's why I am not in debate. I don't think that he'll mind if I spend some of it.right? I mean.I really don't know what I mean. So I think I'll do this. * Grabs Yami's shoes.* They don't come off!!! What kind of gay stack of pancakes on a Tuesday, is this? Grr. I also want your coat and your one of your belt buckles.because I want and new piece of jewelry.
Legolas: But you already wear over 90 pieces of jewelry. (This is true! O_0)
OoshatiElf: So?
Legolas: Do you really need any more?
OoshatiElf: I course I do!! I like to set off the metal detectors at the airport! it's funny! Then they frisk you! Hahaha! Sorta like in the Matrix, when Neo and Trinity go through the metal detectors and then the guy tells them to take out any loose change and then Neo flashes them with the guns!!!
Everyone: *sighs*
OoshatiElf: *grabs Yami's shoes!* Hahahahaha! Ha. I am having your shoes! And the rest of your pants.*embarrassed look.* Have your pants back. * Throws them back at him.* I think that I'll leave the situation to you, my short, little sister. Jaa ne. *Climbs aboard Pancake taking Trunks and Legolas with her.flying off into the mountains.*
Yami: *stares in bewilderment, after OoshatiElf* She.. She took my shoes..
REVIEW!!!!!
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
DragonPiper: This is my 2nd fic, sorry if it took a long time to post but, *whispers* I think my inspiration has been avoiding me. It was hiding out in Canada, but I sent Seto up to fetch it! ^-^
Seto: Yeah, straight into a BLIZZARD!!!!
DragonPiper: Oh Seto, stop being so melodramatic!
Seto: I'm not being melodramatic! You did send me into a blizzard!
DragonPiper: Heh, Heh. I mean, just a little one. *Retorts* besides you didn't find it!
Seto: *yelling* How was I supposed to? I was in a freaking BLIZZARD!!!!
(DragonPiper and Seto continue to argue so Ryou and Yugi take over.)
Ryou: *whispers to Yugi* what are we supposed to say?
Yugi: *confused* I don't know. *cheerful* I'll ask Yami, he'll know!
Yugi: *yells offstage loud enough to break windows* Yami!!! Yami!!!! YAMI!!!! Where did he go?
Ryou: I don't know.*a pause then, pales* I just remembered!
Yugi: *concerned* what?
Ryou: *shifts uncomfortably* I was looking for my ring and I asked your yami and mine to help.
Yugi: So? *Suspicious tone in his voice*
Ryou: Well, Yami said he wouldn't help if he didn't get paid, but I was all out of cash, and all I had with me at the moment was..
Yugi: *eyes widen* Ryou tell me that you didn't give Yami sugar.
Ryou: Well I was out of cash and that was all I had! Besides, he found my ring! *Hugs it then adopts a thoughtful tone* But then he and my yami ran to Canada on a sugar high and I haven't seen them since..
(DragonPiper and Seto make a truce and decide that next time they'll send Pegasus. They walk over late enough to see Yugi chasing Ryou all over the stage and screaming death threats at him.)
DragonPiper: *grabs Ryou by the arm as he runs by* Hey, why is Yugi chasing you?
(Seto grabs Yugi by the back of his collar as he lunges at Ryou.)
Ryou: *realizes that Yugi can no longer catch him, because now DragonPiper and Seto are here, sighs* Sigh! *Then suddenly realizes that this is DragonPiper and Seto we are talking about* Uh. nothing!
Yugi: *shouts* HE'S LYING!!!!! HE GAVE YAMI SUGAR!!!!!!
Seto: *lets go of Yugi's collar* you did WHAT?
Ryou: Hey, don't worry! I only gave him 2 gummi bears.
Seto: *ranting* HOW COULD YOU GIVE YAMI-- *calming down* Oh. Only two? (Ryou nods vigorously; While DragonPiper is still holding his arm) Well, we shouldn't have to worry then, 2 gummi bears won't last long even for Yami.
DragonPiper: *suddenly lets go of Ryou's arm, coughs and looks at the ceiling* Um. guys.. Ryou wasn't the only one who gave Yami sugar.
Ryou, Yugi, Seto: *in unison* WHAT?
DragonPiper: * coughs* Well, I couldn't find my inspiration. and you all know Yami doesn't work for free.
Yugi: So, exactly how much sugar are we talking about here? A pixi stix or two?
DragonPiper: *nervously* Um, not exactly. *looks out a window* Try 6 boxes of Pocky.. Uh, Heh, Heh
(This statement is greeted by silence)
DragonPiper: Uh, guys? *Turns around to find all three boys in a dead faint* Oops!
In Canada:
Yami: Well, George I think we are safe here.
Inspiration: My name's not George.
Yami: *confused* It's not? Oh, it must be the sugar that Ryou gave me.
Yami Bakura: Lucky. my own light wouldn't give me any. *sniffles* and I'm his YAMI!!!!!
Yami: Well, I have an explanation! A wonderful one!
Yami Bakura: *pouts* so, what's this great explanation?
Yami: 4 words: You suck. I don't.
Yami Bakura: WHAT? Why you little ******* (censored)
Yami: *scolding* Yami Bakura! We are trying to keep this fic PG!!!!!! Now say you're sorry.
Yami Bakura: *looks at Yami* I'm sorry Yami. *Turns to DragonPiper's Inspiration* I'm sorry George.
Inspiration: My name's not George!!!!!
Yami Bakura: *confused* It's not? Oh. Must be the sugar Ryou gave me..
Yami: *confused* Ryou didn't give you any sugar.
Yami Bakura: *laughs* Oh, yeah! *Then remembers why Ryou didn't give him any sugar and begins to cry*
Yami: *suddenly concerned* Yami Bakura, why are you crying?
Yami Bakura: *in a high tone of voice* I can't catch my shadow!
Yami: *confused* Yami Bakura, your shadow is still on the ground where it has been all your life.
Yami Bakura: Oh. *Suddenly excited* Why don't you come back to Never Neverland with me, Wendy?
Yami: *looks around* who are you talking to? There is no Wendy here.
Yami Bakura: *confused* Yes, there is. You are standing right in front of me Wendy!
Yami: You think I am Wendy? *Laughs* No, I'm Yami Yugi, remember? The Egyptian Pharaoh who's Millennium Puzzle you tried to steal, Yami Bakura.
Yami Bakura: *really confused* Yami Bakura? Who's Yami Bakura? I'm Peter Pan. I don't know who Yami Bakura is.
Yami: *stern voice* you are NOT Peter Pan, *quietly* who ever that is, you are Yami Bakura, an Egyptian Tomb Raider.
Yami Bakura: *points to himself* No, I'm Peter Pan, *points to Yami* you are Wendy, and that, *points to DragonPiper's Inspiration* is Little John. *giggles*
Yami: *screams* ARRGHHHH!!!!!! NOOOOO!!!!! Yami Bakura is now on a Sugar deprivation, and thinks he's PETER PAN!!!!!!!!! Oh the HORROR!!!!!
Yami Bakura: * to DragonPiper's Inspiration, while Yami is still yelling* Where is your teddy bear Little John? I thought you never went anywhere without it.
Inspiration: *exasperated* I'm not Little John or George or anything else you will call me in the future, I'm DragonPiper's Inspiration!
Yami Bakura: *comforting* Denial is to be expected.
Inspiration: *outraged* I'm not in denial!!!!
(Yami finally gets control over his shock and starts to listen to Yami Bakura and DragonPiper's Inspiration bicker of whether or not Inspiration, was in denial about being Little John.)
Yami: *digs out a conveniently placed cell phone and calls Yugi.*
Back Onstage:
On the stage DragonPiper is contemplating on what to do with the three unconscious boys when a pocket in Yugi jacket begins to vibrate. (Yugi's phone vibrates when it rings. FYI! ) Yugi is still unconscious so DragonPiper answers.
DragonPiper: Hello? This is Yugi's cell phone, may I ask who is calling?
On the other line: Yami is so glad that someone answered that he almost forgets why he was calling.
Yami: *frantic* Hello? Where is Yugi? I need to talk to him.
DragonPiper: Uh. Yugi is um. detained at the moment can I take a message?
Yami: *suspicious tone* who is this?
DragonPiper: *simply* DragonPiper. Who is this?
Yami: Yami, Oh good I need to get a helicopter up here right away!
DragonPiper: Why?
Yami: Because Yami Bakura is now on a sugar deprivation, and thinks he's Peter Pan, or something like that.
DragonPiper: Sugar deprivation? Well that is serious! I'll get Seto up, and get a helicopter up there pronto! By the way, where are you guys anyway?
Yami: We're in Canada, with Yami Bakura and George. *DragonPiper hears a voice in the background say," My name is not GEORGE!!!!!!!"*
DragonPiper: I think that's my Inspiration!
Yami: *confused* Your Inspiration? No Inspiration here. Just us two yamis and Good ol' George. *From the background once again: MY NAME IS NOT GEORGE!!!!!!!*
DragonPiper: *to herself* Yep that's my Inspiration! *to Yami* Okay Yami, I'll get the helicopter, and you make sure that all three of you get on the helicopter, no matter WHAT! Okay?
Yami: Ok. *hangs up*
(DragonPiper hangs up, goes over to Seto and roughly shakes him out of unconsciousness.)
Seto: *still half-asleep* Just another hour okay Mokuba?
DragonPiper: Mokuba wakes you up, Seto?
Seto: *waking up* Huh?
DragonPiper: Nevermind. Seto, we need to send a helicopter to fly to Canada and pick up Yami, a delusional Yami Bakura, and my Inspiration.
Seto: *fully awake* From Canada? Uh, I don't know..
DragonPiper: Seto, if you say no, I will set an angry cat on you again!!!
Seto: *winces at the memory* Ok, ok! Here, call this number, and tell the pilot to pick them up.
DragonPiper: *hugs him* Thank you, Seto! ^-^
Seto: *gets up and starts to leave* you're welcome.
DragonPiper: *calls* Oh, Seto! I forgot I need you to go get a few packages of candy.
Seto: Fine, whatever.
In Canada:
Yami: *to Yami Bakura and Inspiration* Okay, guys there is a helicopter coming to pick us up. Remember we are in Canada so it could take hours for it to get he-
(All of the sudden the helicopter lands on the ground, in the middle of Yami's sentence.)
Yami Bakura: *stares at the helicopter in absolute terror* AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *stumbles , gets up and starts running shouting:* they found us!!!! Get the files Andrea! Get the FLIES!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Yami: Are you Ok, Yami Bakura?
(Yami Bakura, was running around in circles shouting, then he ran into a wall, fell down and apparently was dazed. Yami took this opportunity to drag Yami Bakura and DragonPiper's Inspiration on the helicopter.)
About 2 minutes into the ride, Yami Bakura seemed to finally become aware of his surroundings and curled up into a ball, rocked back and forth, and started to mutter: "The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me.." And when Yami dared to give him a weird look Yami Bakura pointed at Yami, and screamed:" THE ELVES ARE GONNA GET YOU!!!!!!" Then he went back to chanting: "The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me, The elves will save me..."
About 2 hours later, with Yami Bakura still chanting, They landed outside the stage area and the first thing they see is a DDR (Dance, Dance, Revolution) station outside the Stage Door and standing next to it was Frodo? DragonPiper and the three boys step out and stare at Frodo.
Seto: *whispers to Ryou, with a package of Pocky in each hand* since when is Frodo in this fic? I thought he was in LOTR. (Lord of the Rings)
Ryou: That's what I thought.
Frodo: *to the delusional Yami Bakura* so it was YOU who called the elves! You cannot call the elves!
Yami Bakura : Why not?
Frodo: Only I can call the elves!!!! *he said this like it was the most obvious thing in the entire cosmos *
Yami Bakura: Why? *Frodo looked like he was about to explode*
Frodo: I told you! ONLY I CAN CALL THE ELVES!!!!!!!
Yami Bakura: Why?
Frodo: Because YOU aren't in LOTR! Duh!
Yami Bakura: So?
Frodo: *searching for a good retort* Uh, because I said so!
Yami Bakura: So?
Frodo: *stuttering* Uh, Um..well..
Yami: *interrupts Frodo's stuttering* Oh! BURN!!! *then broke into hysterics* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
Everyone: *backs away from Yami*
Yami: *confused* what?
Frodo: *suddenly sees the rest of the cast (aka: Ryou, DragonPiper's Inspiration, Yugi, Yami, DragonPiper, and lastly Seto.) and sees Seto holding the 2 packages of Pocky and his eyes bulge* YOU!!!!
Seto: *looks around wildly* me?
Frodo: *enraged, accusingly* YOU took my POCKY!!!!!! Pocky Stealer!!!!!!
Seto: *utterly confused* what? I bought these at the candy store like DragonPiper told me to.
Frodo: NO!!!! They are mine!!!
Yami Bakura: *heroic* As Peter Pan I will not let Seto Kaiba take these indignities!!! I challenge you Captain Hook, to a.. *dramatic pause* Drum roll please * this was directed to the skies, Yami said: "Yami Bakura the skies can't give a drum ro-" , then the skies gave a dramatic drum roll.* DDR DUEL!!!!! *looks very smug*
Seto: *to Yami, who had come over to the stage area* Yami Bakura is standing up for me? Should I be worried?
Yami: I wouldn't worry, remember, he thinks he's Peter Pan.
Seto: Who?
DragonPiper: You don't know who Peter Pan is? *Seto shakes head, says with pride* He is the greatest cartoon hero of all time! *falters* At least that is what my little sister tells me..
Yami Bakura: *to Frodo* Do you have the courage to accept my challenge? Do you have the Magic Flying Pancake of AliBaba?
Frodo: *stares at Yami Bakura in disbelief, who had adopted a heroic pose*
Yami Bakura: *accusingly* Well? DO YOU?
All: O.o What?
Yami Bakura: I knew you weren't brave enough to challenge the Almighty: PETER PAN!!!!!!!
Frodo: *Only hears the part about not being brave enough* what? Me? Not brave enough? Ha!
Yugi: Why is Frodo talking like a guy from the medieval times?
Frodo: *to Yami Bakura in a weird accent* I accept your challenge, but only to reclaim the Pocky that is rightfully MINE! Prepare to lose you recant DDRer!
Everyone Else: DDRer?
Frodo: *dignified pose* Yes! DDRer!!!!! DUN DUN DUN!!
Yami Bakura: *to Frodo* Nay, it is thee who will be the loser, Captain HOOK!!!!!
Frodo: Surely you jest!
Yami Bakura: Nay! Surely it is YOU who jests!
Frodo: No, surely you jest!
Yami Bakura: *turns red with fury* No! It IS YOU who jests!
Frodo: *looks insulted, although he very well may have been, hard to tell* No! You!
Yami Bakura: *looks outraged* No! You!!
Frodo: *yells* No! You!!!
Yami Bakura: *yells at the top of his lungs* No! You!!!!
Frodo: *screams* you!
Yami Bakura: *screams at the highest possible chord* YOU!!!!!!!!
Frodo: *pouts* Fine. It was I who jested. *points at Yami Bakura* But I will still defeat you, you undignified pile of horse *points at Yami Bakura, but then falters* .um.we are keeping this fic PG, right? *looks at DragonPiper, who nods* .radish!
Yami Bakura: *walks over to DDR station* Bring it on thou craven varlet!!
Frodo: Fine, but what's a "craven varlet"?
DragonPiper: You don't want to know! (She was the only one who understood what Yami Bakura had said, so she shot him a grin.)
Yami Bakura: *Yami Bakura and Frodo step onto the DDR* Oh! Oh! Can I choose the song?
Frodo: Fine, whatever.
Yami Bakura: Yay! Okay here is my song *he pushed a button on the DDR consul*
Yami: What song? (but Yami Bakura needn't answer for, well I think once you see it, it will be self-explanatory. But the song started at Yami Bakura and Frodo stated dancing. The duel was on!)
Oh, yeah, in case you were wondering here are the words to Yami Bakura's song: It's called: The Pirates who don't do anything. (Techno version)
"Ar, Ar, Ar, Ar! We are the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything, We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
Well I've never been to Greenland, And I've never been to Denver, And I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul, And I've never been to Moscow, And I've never been to Tampa, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
'Cause, we're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
And I've never hoist the main stay, And I've never swabbed the poopdeck, And I never faired the starboard, 'Cause I've never sail at all, And I've never walked the Gangplank, And I've never owned a parrot, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
'Cause, we're the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
Oh, I've never plucked a rooster, And I'm not too good at ping-pong, And I've never thrown my mashed potaters up against the wall, And I've never kissed a chipmunk, And I've never gotten Head-lice, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
Pirate Captain Flove, 2002, Who be this man we found in cage, And why they be so full of contradiction?
We don't know what he did, But we're tellin' Captain Kidd. We don't wake up before lunch, But we all eat Captain Crunch! We don't smoke we don't chew, We watch Captain Kangaroo!
And I've never licked a sparkplug, And I've never sniffed a stinkbug, And I've never painted daisies on a big red rubber ball, And I've never bathed in yogurt, And I don't look good in leggings, And I've never been to Boston in the fall.
We are the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything.
We are the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, We just stay home and lie around, And if you ask us to do anything We'll just tell you, we don't do anything!"
( Well after all the music was finished both Yami Bakura and Frodo were panting heavily for breath. After about a 1-minute and a ½ The DDR screen flashed the words: "DDR duel outcomes loading.." Everyone watched as the screen flashed again, but then shorted out. Two last words blinked on the screen before it blacked out: System Failure.)
Yami Bakura: *screaming at the top of his lungs while shaking the DDR machine* YOU STUPID MACHINE!!!!!! YOU KNOW I WON BUT JUST DON'T WANT TO ADMIT THAT I AM THE BEST!!!!!!
Frodo: *just stares at Yami Bakura's sudden outburst* blink, blink..
Yami Bakura: *runs over to Seto, who is still numb with shock over Yami Bakura's outburst, and grabs the Pocky from him* Ha! I won! I always win for I am Peter Pan!! I get the best candy in the world, POCK- (Suddenly with a puff of plaid smoke, OoshatiElf appeared, ran up to a stunned Yami Bakura, grabs the Pocky from his outstretched hands and yelled, " Ha! I win!")
Yami Bakura: Hold on a sec! Those are MINE!!! *tries to grab them*
OoshatiElf: *snatches them away , and bares fangs* No! MINES!!!!! *then points* HA! *and disappears with a squish into the plaid colored smoke*
Yami Bakura: *to DragonPiper* your sister stole my CANDY!!!!!
DragonPiper: *shrugs* what can I say? She's a Pocky-addict.
Yami Bakura: *sniffles* But I won them fair and square! *begins to tear up*
OoshatiElf: *suddenly appears with the plaid cloud of smoke, hands Yami Bakura a Pocky stick, pats him on the head* There you go Yami Bakura. Have Fun! *disappears in a flash of plaid*
Yami Bakura: *eyes light up* Ohhhhh..Yay!!!! Thank you OoshatiElf!!!! I lovededs yoooouuuu!!!!
DragonPiper: *pouts*
Yami Bakura: *stuffs whole stick in his mouth, and gobbles it down*
Yami: Do you know who you are now?
Yami Bakura: Of course! I'm Yami Bakura, a Egyptian Tomb Raider, who constantly tries to steal your Millennium Puzzle. Exactly as you specified.
Yami: *shocked* When did I say that?
Yami Bakura: Oh, back on page 5 when I believed myself to be the fictional character, Peter Pan.
Yami: Oh,. yeah.
Inspiration: *whispers to Ryou* since when does Yami Bakura had that big of a vocabulary?
Yami Bakura: *to Inspiration* since when are you so full of incomprehensible contradiction?
DragonPiper: *cheers* you, tell them Yami Bakura!! *gives an encouraging smile* they are being tenacious aren't they? I don't see what is so ambiguous about an expansive vocabulary. *raises right hand* Yami Bakura, I assure you, that I find nothing perplexing about your contemporary quandary.
Yami Bakura: *sighs* Finally someone who understands! *hugs DragonPiper, who smiles* Thank you for being able to carry on intellectual dialogue!
Everyone but DragonPiper, Yami Bakura: O.o
Yami Bakura: I propose that we adjourn the provisional meeting, and establish it once again within the walls of the stage vicinity.
DragonPiper: I couldn't have prompted that any more intellectually. *gestures towards the door, starts to walk to the door then turns back to the rest of the cast* Are you guys coming?
Everyone: O.o
DragonPiper: Will stop staring at me like that? It's really exasperating! What? Didn't think I could carry on an intelligent conversation? Well, if THAT was what you thought, you will need a time out. *turns to face them, with Yami Bakura standing next to her* Now, what chastisement should I give you? *Yami Bakura whispers in her ear, her face lights up* Ohhhhh! That's a good one!! *smiles at everyone else (including Frodo) with a maniacal grin* Well, Yami Bakura has prompted the best castigation for your current dilemma. *holds up hand, and snaps her fingers, they are instantly transported to a white room with a large 60" screen, chairs that are melted into the floor with chains and things to keep your eyes open.*
Yami: How did you that?
DragonPiper: *about to answer when Yami Bakura interrupts*
Yami Bakura: *to DragonPiper* I think I can clarify this if you don't mind.
DragonPiper: Go ahead.
Yami Bakura: *to everyone* you, see we are in a alternate dimension when the Authoress *points to DragonPiper* has almighty powers, so the entire universe is, to put it simply, her 's to bend.
DragonPiper: Very good. I think that is it.
Yami, Seto, Yugi, Frodo, Inspiration, Ryou: *are now inspecting the TV*
DragonPiper: Okay that's enough! Now sit down in the chair that specifies your name.
Everyone: *does*
Yami: Why doesn't Yami Bakura have to be punished?
DragonPiper: Well, Yami Bakura didn't contradict my intellectual capabilities , now did he? *snaps her fingers again, the chains strap everyone down* There.
Seto: *struggling against his bonds* Hey! You can't do this!
DragonPiper: Actually, I can. Were you listening to Yami Bakura's explanation? *Everyone nods* I can do this because I have awesome Authoress powers. *turns to leave* Oh, yes. If you try to go to sleep or just keep your eyes shut the machine will be forced to prop them open.
Yugi: So what are we watching?
DragonPiper: *evil grin* Oh, I won't spoil it. But I will tell you that you WON'T enjoy it!
Everyone: *stares at her in horror*
Seto: *pieces it together* DragonPiper! I'm sorry! You can't make us watch that! I'm really, really sorry!!!!
Yami: Why? what are we watching?
DragonPiper: I'm sorry everyone, but when I feel that you personally are seriously sorry I will stop the movie and let you out, then restart the movie until you are all out. Well I hope this will only moderately horrify you.. Bye. *walks out with Yami Bakura directly behind*
Seto: *the minute the door closes he starts to hyperventilate, and look from side to side*
Yami: *seriously concerned* Seto? Are you okay? What are we-(but he needn't say anything for the movie was beginning, and the title of the movie was: Barney the Purple Dinosaur, Re-runs.)
Everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!
DragonPiper: *about 2 seconds into the theme song, the movie pauses, comes in lets Seto out, who hugs her and they walk out then close the door, the movie starts*
Movie: "I love you, you love me let get together and be one big fam-ily.."
Everyone:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ryou, Yugi: *furiously struggling, then eye's light up, they look at each other then they lower their heads*
DragonPiper: *comes in pauses the movie snaps fingers lets Ryou and Yugi, who start stuttering apologies out, then begins the movie again*
Yami: *screams* this is the worst torture EVER!!!! *thinks* I'm sorry! I really am! *hears DragonPiper* Yami are you sure you REALLY are sorry and don't just wanna get out?
Yami: I didn't ever doubt your "intellectual capabilities" I just didn't understand the words, so I stared. *waits but hears no response from DragonPiper* Hello? Where did you go?
DragonPiper: *comes in pauses movie undoes Yami's chains, restarts the movie, gets ready to leave then turns around and unchains Inspiration, then leaves*
In another room with Ryou, Yugi, Yami Bakura, Seto, are all playing cards.
DragonPiper: *sits down, shuffles deck*
Inspiration: *sits down in an empty chair* Deal me in.
Yami: *stares as DragonPiper deals everyone in* isn't Frodo sorry yet?
DragonPiper: Oh, yes. He was sorry before he stepped into that room.
Yami: So, are you gonna let him out?
DragonPiper: He IS out.
Yami: He is?!
DragonPiper: Yeah. After we left, I transported him back to Middle Earth. Besides I never liked him very much, so I made him watch it.. You playing Yami?
Yami: *sits* Yeah. What are we playing?
DragonPiper: *is about to answer when, Yami Bakura interrupts*
Yami Bakura: Ohh! Ohh! Can I choose the game? *jumps up and down in seat*
DragonPiper: Sure, why not?
Yami Bakura: Okay..*thinks* we're gonna play Oh Hell!
DragonPiper: Yes! I love that game! Even though I'm not very good *punches the air, then looks around* Oh yeah, does everyone know how to play?
Everyone: Yep.
Yami: I bet I can beat everyone at this card game!
Yami Bakura: I bet you can't. I bet that either DragonPiper or I will beat you.
Yami: Fine! I bet $50 bucks I win!
Yami Bakura: Fine, I will bet $50 also, but if it is a draw between DragonPiper and I then you have to pay us $50 bucks EACH.
Yami: Deal *they shake hands*
15 minutes later, Ryou is reading off the scores.
Ryou: *reads off the score sheet*
Yami Bakura, 87
DragonPiper, 87
Seto, 76
Inspiration, 75
Me, 75
Yugi, 53
Yami, -21.
Yami Bakura: Yeah! You owe us $100 bucks!!! Ha!
Yami: How, could I lose? I'm the King of Games!!!
DragonPiper: It's okay Yami. You can't win everything.
Yami: But.. I'm the King of Games!!!
DragonPiper: Get over it Yami.
Yami: I'm the King of Games!!!
DragonPiper: Put a sock in it. *pulls out a sock and stuffs it in Yami's mouth* There.
Seto: *laughing manically* Ha! Even I beat you!!! Ha! You LOST!!!!
Yami: *spits out sock, raises hand to his Puzzle and the little eye thingy on his head starts to glow* that's it Kaiba!!! Beat this!!!! *yells a word that is incomprehensible, and the room turns to negatives, y'know when Yami does the Mind Crush thing, then there is a huge cloud if smoke where Seto was sitting*
(The smoke starts to clear)
DragonPiper: Seto! No! *to Yami* YOU!!!!! You turned Seto into a CHIBI!!!!!!!! *starts to strangle Yami* YOU TURNED SETO INTO A CHIBI!!!!!!!!!!! CHANGE HIM BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: *chokes* someone... Get. Her. Off...Me...
Yugi: *reluctantly, pulls DragonPiper off of Yami, who tries to catch his breath, while Seto is blinking into the bright light*
DragonPiper: *screaming at the top of her lungs* CHANGE SETO BACK TO NORMAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ryou: Calm down DragonPiper. Yami will restore Seto, won't you Yami?
Yami: *shifts uncomfortably* Well, ya see that's the problem.
DragonPiper: *seething* what's the problem?!
Yami: Well, I was actually trying to Mind Crush him, not turn him into a chibi, so I don't know how to change him back.
Everyone, but Seto and Yami: WHAT?!
Yami: But, I can try!
DragonPiper: Fine. Just change him back. Picks Seto up and sets him on the table*
Seto: *to Yami* Hi! I Seto Kaiba! *waves* who you?
Yami: Uh.. Hi. I'm Yami, now hold still. Lemme try to get this right. Hmmm... *screws up his face then, yells another incomprehensible word and more smoke appears, then they hear double giggles*
Seto: * the smoke clears and they saw not 1 chibi Seto but 2 giggling Chibi Setos*
Seto 1: Hi! I Seto! Who you?
Yami: Oh, boy..
Seto 2: Gee, that's an odd name: " Oh Boy"
Seto 1: Yeah, Hmmmm..
Seto 2: * to DragonPiper* Hi! I Kaiba! Who you?
DragonPiper: GAAAHHHHHH!!!! Yami! You CLONED HIM!!!!!!!
Yami: Uh.. Let me try just once more!
DragonPiper: Fine! Just get it right this time!
Yami: OK. * the eye glows on his head he yells another word, that sounds like "Dragon Ball Z" , the room goes to negatives, and there is more smoke*
Yugi: Geez, Yami... What is it with the smoke and the negatives?
Yami: *smoke is still heavy* I like the way the special effects look.
*smoke clears, and everyone sees Trunks from Dragon Ball Z. Trunks is Vegita's son*
Trunks: *apparently dazed, sits up looks around* Huh? What am I doing here? *suddenly terrified* is this some trick by Buu?
OoshatiElf: *appears in her cloud of plaid smoke, glomps Trunks and then disappears into her cloud*
Trunks: What was that?!?!?! O_o;;;;;;
DragonPiper: *to Trunks* I'm sorry you're her favorite character..
OoshatiElf: *re-appears, talks with serious tone* Trunks. I am going to give you the secret on how to defeat Buu.
Trunks: *Steps forward* Yes?!
OoshatiElf: *Glomps* Sorry.couldn't control myself. the secret is.*dramatic music starts playing* Dun..dun..dun.. Is to poke him with a demonic Spork! *Brandishes blue spork* poke him with this and all your troubles will go away with the sound of bagpipes.and if you poke him and hear no bagpipes.then you are screwed. Bye!!! *Glomps and huggles him again.* I give you smoochies! *Smooches him* ^______^ *disappears is a cloud of plaid smoke with the sounds of bells. *
Trunks: She took the Spork with her!!! ^^;;;;
OoshatiElf: Heheheh.sorry about that.here *Gives him the Spork. * *Doesn't disappear, but walks to a pancake and hops on.* Come on, Legolas..
DragonPiper: Since when is Legolas in this fic?
OoshatiElf: Since I said so.I am the older Authoress.so my powers are stronger than yours. HA! Come on Leggy-chan!
Legolas: Coming!
DragonPiper: *goggles* Wow he is one hot mama!!! *looks disgruntled, while in astonishment* Since when did I say stuff like that?!
OoshatiElf: Since I have more Authoress powers!! Hahahahaha! I win. Oh yes.*jumps off pancake* Here Yami Bakura. *Gives him another piece of Pocky* and do you want me to change Seto back to normal? Or I could not.hmm.do I really want him to be back to normal.but then again.I have a diabolical plan to steal his trench coat.and his shoes..they are not as cool as Spike's.he is from Cowboy Bebop, my naive little sister who can't watch Adult Swim. *maniacal laughter* MUWhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha!!! *stops laughing when She realizes everyone is looking at her weird.* Erm.moving on.what is your decision?
DragonPiper: YOU CAN'T HAVE HIS TRENCHCOAT!!!
OoshatiElf: Piffle. Can I have his shoes? DragonPiper: You want his shoes? Why?
OoshatiElf: I want his shoes because I can't have Spike's shoes.and plus you almost never see his shoes.so he can't need them that much.right? Or I could just take Yami Yugi's shoes.even though they look like they are attached to his outfit.are they? Let's have me check it out! *Runs at Yami Yugi* Let me see your shoes!!!
Yami: GHAHHHH!!!!! You get away from my beauteous shoes, you side-show freak!!!!
DragonPiper: Hey! Yami, you need to apologize! *to OoshatiElf* You can have Yami's shoes.
Yami: What?!
DragonPiper: Oh Yami, get over it! You have 3 closets full of shoes for Heaven's sake!!
Yami: So?
OoshatiElf: YEAH! Let me have your shoes!! I likey them!! Me likes! Plus I stole your other shoes! Mwhaha! And I hope that you don't think that the insult that you threw at me was insulting me..because I am a freak!!! *Deranged look on her face* I shall rule the world! And take South America for all the drug money!! And with that I shall buy InuYasha and Mobile suit: Gundam Wing manga!! Bwhahahahaha! And I might buy glue. I don't know. *leaps at Yami's feet.* Gimme the shoes!!!
DragonPiper: I thought that South America was for Robbie...
OoshatiElf: *looks up from Yami's feet* Oh yes.it was.but I'll give him all the drug money after I spend around 400 bucks, and you know how much drugs cost.well actually I don't because I don't use them.but Anime: Drugs would be cheaper. Hmm.that really doesn't help my argument. I guess that's why I am not in debate. I don't think that he'll mind if I spend some of it.right? I mean.I really don't know what I mean. So I think I'll do this. * Grabs Yami's shoes.* They don't come off!!! What kind of gay stack of pancakes on a Tuesday, is this? Grr. I also want your coat and your one of your belt buckles.because I want and new piece of jewelry.
Legolas: But you already wear over 90 pieces of jewelry. (This is true! O_0)
OoshatiElf: So?
Legolas: Do you really need any more?
OoshatiElf: I course I do!! I like to set off the metal detectors at the airport! it's funny! Then they frisk you! Hahaha! Sorta like in the Matrix, when Neo and Trinity go through the metal detectors and then the guy tells them to take out any loose change and then Neo flashes them with the guns!!!
Everyone: *sighs*
OoshatiElf: *grabs Yami's shoes!* Hahahahaha! Ha. I am having your shoes! And the rest of your pants.*embarrassed look.* Have your pants back. * Throws them back at him.* I think that I'll leave the situation to you, my short, little sister. Jaa ne. *Climbs aboard Pancake taking Trunks and Legolas with her.flying off into the mountains.*
Yami: *stares in bewilderment, after OoshatiElf* She.. She took my shoes..
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