Her hands rubbed against each other, and the gloves she was wearing created that friction she so desperately needed. She was more than nervous, it was February and she was sitting all alone on a love seat in the café she had decided to meet him in.
She breathed in and out, if she was nervous, she hid it well. She had done that for a while now, she never let others in for the main reason she was in this condition now: a heartbreak. She hadn't wanted to meet up with him in the first place, she had bags under her eyes, she was paler than usually and a hat covered her hair. It was growing back into place and she did not want to show it yet.
She heard the ting! Of the coffee shop door opening and she slowly turned to meet a pair of eyes that always made her freeze up, those dark, dark eyes. She didn't smile, it wasn't a situation in which she wanted to smile.
His shoulders were tense, and his jaw was tight. He was putting up his guard up for her and it made her chest clench in a way she was never used to feel, he stopped in front of her and she was looking up at him from the seat. She wanted him to sit beside her but sadly, he chose the individual seat.
She blinked when she saw the ring on his hand, she hadn't wanted to believe it, but it was the truth, he was engaged now and it killed her. "Sasuke-kun, glad you made it in time to see me", she said and there was the unmistakable pain in her voice, even she could hear it.
He nodded, and she knew he was still thinking of the last time they had seen each other. She smiled at his clenched jaw, "How's life?" she asked and her hands found each other in a grip that could have passed to any other viewer as a normal grip, but he knew she was controlling herself.
"Fine" was his answer, and she tried to not to cry. She knew he would not speak any more and she smiled sadly to herself. She had made this desition a while ago, "How is your family? I haven't seen them in a while", and yet, one more sign and she would break down.
"They are fine too". She blinked and sat up straight, "Do you still think about December?" she whispered, and she noticed his tensing even more, her smile disappeared, a frown replacing it. "I do. I still think about it, I wish we could go back to December and make it all right, but I can't. Not after…." She stopped.
He did not know, and he did not need to know now. He was engaged now and probably in love, and it pained her more than anything else in the world. More than the headaches she got, or the pain the chimio gave her the day after treatments. It was the kind of pain that made her want to die already.
"I am sorry I did that. I am… swallowing up my pride now, Sasuke-kun. But that is not enough, you are engaged I heard? Congratulations, you always did want to marry". Her voice did break now, and they both knew why.
It was cold, or at least it felt that way to her. Her hands were still shacking and her legs had gone out under her, the envelope still in her hands. She had cancer, in an intermediate stage, it was still treatable but the recovering percentage was not encouraging enough.
She had spotted a mole on her back a couple of months ago, but she did not check it until it started aching, and after some studies, the results came. She couldn't breathe properly, and she was crying too hard now. What was she going to do?
She had a boyfriend, a cat, a home and a job she loved. Speaking of which, the boyfriend was about to arrive for a dinner they were going to have that very same night, she heard the car park and a knock on the door.
She quickly dried her tears and hid the results, she knew what she had to do now, and it would hurt like hell but she was going to die anyway, wasn't she? She opened the door after checking her make up in the mirror and tried to smile for the very same boyfriend who had a bouquet of roses in his hand and a smirk on his face. The smirk that disappeared when he saw her face.
"Sakura?" he asked and immediately stepped into the house, she did not notice the tears that were streaming down her face, but he did. And she knew why he was freaking out, he loved her and he had never seen her cry before.
"Sasuke-kun, it's nothing". But he knew there was something, the ring on her hand was now heavier and her delicate fingers took it off. "I can't marry you. I am sorry", and she handed him the ring, but he just stared at her. "Sakura? What the hell are you talking about?" he asked as he shook her shoulders, "I just can't… I don't love you anymore". That was the blow that brought him down, it was a lie but he would never find out.
He had left with the ring, and she thought she had seen him with teary eyes, but Sasuke Uchiha never cried and neither did Sakura Haruno. Funny how they even complimented each other in that way.
She didn't call on his birthday either, but that was it. She could never return to him, Sasuke wanted a family, kids with her. He had said so, but what good would she bring him if she was going to die anyway?
She blinked as the memory faded, Sasuke was still silent, and even more tense than before. "I am sorry I brought you here, I guess I wanted to tell you that before I left". That caught his attention, "Left?" he echoed and she nodded without a word, "Where?" he asked and failed in trying to not sound curious.
"I'm leaving next week to tour around the world for a while, after I arrange certain… affairs". She finished with wide eyes, the feeling was back and her stomach clenched in pain, she had forgotten to take the pills that morning because she was so nervous.
"Sakura?" she would have smiled at the way he stood up and instantly was beside her, but she couldn't in that condition. A shaky breath was all she could breathe out and her phone rang at the very same moment a young man walked into the coffee shop, a shocked look on his face.
"Sakura!" was all she heard before her world turned black, but not before whispering a single "Sorry" to Sasuke.
She tried to open her eyelids but they were too heavy, she felt drowsy. But she managed to open her eyes, and she blinked in order to disrupt the light coming into the room. She recognized the smell and the wall colors. The hospital.
"Sakura?" someone whispered and she tried to turn around, "Miss Haruno", her eyes widened and she heard that undertone her mentor had, "Aa, Tsunade-sensei" she said and chuckled lightly at the frown the older woman had.
"Sakura, you really blew it this time. Anemia, sleep deprivation and you forgot to take your pills", the scolding was nothing now, and they both knew it. Her smile faded when she saw the angry look in Sasuke's face beside her mentor. He knew, and she panicked.
It was about ten minutes later when she was left alone with Sasuke in the hospital room, and she hated the expression on his face. "You have cancer", yes, Sasuke was never the one to use subtle conversations. She nodded and her gaze went to the window.
"When were you diagnosed?" he asked, but it was all interrogation, and the answers he wanted were the very same she planned never to let him know about.
"… I really don't want to talk about this, Sasuke-ku… Sasuke". His eyes were flaming by now and she barely heard him walk beside him, but she felt his harsh grip on her hand, he was like a boy who never wanted to let go of his dying puppy.
"I don't give a damn, I want answers Sakura. Why the fuck didn't you tell me?" his tone made her flinch, but her gaze didn't dare cross his. "Last December" she managed to whisper and his grip tightened. "The night of our dinner" he mumbled and she nodded, fresh tears into her green eyes.
"Damn it, Sakura! I want to stay beside you! Why didn't you just tell me?" he was getting furious and she knew it, it was her job to remain calm now. "For the very same reason, Sasuke-kun. I am dying, you want to stay beside me. Listen to me, Sasuke-kun", and this time her hand gripped his hard, "You are engaged, you have a shot at life and being happy, and I am not letting you waste it. So please, walk out this room, go home and kiss your fiancée".
He smirked and he raised her hand to kiss it gently, "Sakura, I am never letting you go, I never want to marry anyone else, only you. I want to have kids with you, but if we can't I want to die beside you", now that made her cry. She blinked, trying to get the tears to go away but they would not obey.
"No, Sasuke-kun" she whispered and yet she didn't stop him when he kissed her gently, neither did she stop him when his hands held her face and his tongue entered her mouth with a groan. She missed him too much, and yet she couldn't help herself to smile when he crawled into the hospital bed with her and hugged her close to his warm body.
"By the way, we are having lots of kids before anything happens to either one of us, I am not letting you go easily", it made her so happy to hear that, but nothing could replace the feeling that she got when he whispered into her ear,
"Love, Tsunade checked you. The cancer is gone from your body, now you just have anemia. So marry me, will you?"