"Why didn't you help me, Hajime?!"
"I - I couldn't.. I just couldn't.."
"Hajime, I.. I hate you!"
Hajime Hinata awoke sitting upright in his bed, sweat dripping from his forehead and mixing with the tears that were leaving trails down his face. His hands were shaking, and he felt a numbing pain in his limbs. Whatever he had just experienced must have been a nightmare. Unless it wasn't. Then, in that case…
Nagito Komaeda was dead.
Hajime spent a few extra minutes with his face buried in his pillow, letting all of his pent-up fear and hopelessness spill out of him through meek whimpers and choked sobs. When he sat back up, he realized that he felt significantly worse than before.
He had to go see if Komaeda was still okay.
It was oddly dark outside, and Hajime knew he wouldn't be able to do leave his cottage without getting in some kind of trouble. Maybe he could lie his way out of it. The consequences of this risky move didn't matter to Hajime. It was for Komaeda.
Wiping the tears from his eyes and the sweat from his brow one last time, Hajime shakily opened his cottage door and stepped into a darkness that he wasn't prepared for. He expected his way to be illuminated somewhat by the moon, but he couldn't see it anywhere. He had to rely on his memory to get him to Komaeda.
He stepped cautiously down the row of cottages, trying to make out the faces on the signs in front of the doors. It was silent, except for his unstable breathing, and his eyes hadn't adjusted to the dark as well as he had hoped they would. He cursed himself under his breath and moved on to another row.
That's when he heard it.
Singing. No, more like vocalizing. Hajime couldn't hear it well, but he could definitely tell someone around was singing to themselves. He froze for a second as he listened. It was beautiful, really. The person's voice danced around Hajime, almost like it wanted the source to be found. He carefully followed the voice as if it were a leash.
The source of the humming came from behind a cottage door. Hajime glanced at the face on the sign, but his eyes were too tired to focus. Sobbing took a lot of energy.
He snuck up to the door and listened for another moment. It was almost like listening to a choir. Trying not to make too much noise, Hajime knocked quietly on the door.
The singing quit abruptly, making Hajime shudder with the sudden emptiness. Footsteps filled the silence and the doorknob jiggled. Hajime stepped back and waited for the mystery vocalist to appear.
In the doorway stood a tired looking, pale-skinned boy, with messy white hair and bright grey eyes.
Nagito Komaeda blinked at Hajime, looking as alive as ever.
"Hajime? What are you doing here? You - wait, have you been crying?" Komaeda's familiar voice filled Hajime's ears, but all he could hear were three dreaded words in the same voice.
"I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you."
Hearing Komaeda as his caring self again was too much for Hajime after the vivid nightmare. Tears filled his eyes again as he looked at the ground. He put a shaking hand up to his mouth and forced himself to stay upright on weak knees.
"Hajime, what's wrong?" Komaeda stepped forward and carefully draped his arm across Hajime's shoulders. The small gesture finally broke Hajime, causing him to sob out loud as his knees stopped supporting him. Hajime turned and wrapped his arms around Komaeda' neck before he fell to the ground, to which Komaeda responded by hugging him back tightly, allowing Hajime to cry into his shoulder.
"Alright, I don't know what happened, but you're obviously not okay. You have to come in."
Without waiting for a response, Komaeda maneuvered himself so he could pick Hajime up and carry him into his cottage. He put him back down on his bed and went to close the door.
"I can't believe you came out here in the middle of the night, Hajime. That's dangerous. You could've gotten hurt," Komaeda scolded softly like a mother with her child.
"Oh, trust me. I've already been hurt emotionally," Hajime managed to whimper between sobs. He was starting to calm down now that Komaeda was here, but the image of Komaeda, covered in blood, crying out to Hajime and saying he hated him just wouldn't go away.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Komaeda asked worriedly, handing Hajime a roll of paper towels he had stashed somewhere. "Clean yourself up. You're sweating terribly. Are you sick?"
"My mind might be."
"Tell me what happened."
Komaeda sat across from Hajime on his bed, his legs crossed and his elbows on his knees as he held his head up.
"Well, uh-" Hajime was interrupted by a sudden cold chill, causing him to shiver and sneeze. Komaeda immediately responded by reaching back onto the headrest of his bed, where his jacket lay. He tossed it at Hajime. "Put that on."
Hajime obeyed, not realizing how big Komaeda's jacket was. Probably because he was built broader than Hajime was.
"Did you possibly have a nightmare?" Komaeda guessed. Hajime sadly nodded, wiping the stray tears in his eyes with the base of his wrist.
"What was it about? If you don't want to tell me, you don't have to. If it makes you cry I don't want you to." Komaeda spoke softly, reassuringly. Hajime felt himself calm down, with the help of both Komaeda and the weight of his jacket on his shoulders.
"I can do it."
"If you say so."
"I can't remember exactly how it started, but.. You.. You were dead, and.. I was talking to you. No, not talking. You were screaming. About how I could've saved you - about how you hated me. It lasted a lot longer than that, but that's what really.. impacted me."
"Hajime.."
Komaeda leaned closer to Hajime, inspecting him. The brown-haired boy couldn't seem to focus. His eyes were sore and darted in random directions. His head hurt, and a dizziness had formed in the back of his mind. He tried to hold his composure.
"You look sick." Komaeda saw right through his façade.
"Okay, I might be."
Komaeda reached over slowly and set his hand on top of Hajime's. "Can I tell you something?"
"Of course." Hajime said calmly, though his heart felt as if it was going to give out any second now.
"Hajime, you know I don't hate you. I'd never say that, no matter what happened. You're my best friend, and nothing could change that. You know that, right?"
When Komaeda said 'best friend', a strange feeling of disappointment settled in Hajime's chest. What was he hoping for in the first place?
"Yeah. You're.. my best friend, too."
Hajime tried to read Komaeda's expression, but there were no clues to his real emotions.
"But, Hajime-" That got his heart racing again, "there is something else I want to confess."
Komaeda tightened his grip on Hajime's hand slightly as he looked for the right words. Hajime waited nervously.
"I.. Ever since I met you, I've felt something I've never felt before. I don't know what it is, but it's something that only you evoke. I've found a pattern here. When you're with me, I'm pretty much euphoric. I'm just happy to be with you, whenever I can be. But, when you're gone, I.. I feel empty. Like I'm missing something, but I can never tell what it is. I've thought it over, and.. I think I know what the feeling is. Do you have any guesses?"
Hajime could feel his heart pounding rapidly in his throat, preventing him from speaking. So, instead of responding, he shook his head.
Komaeda smiled, intertwining his fingers with Hajime's.
"It's something called love."
The panic in Hajime suddenly dissipated with those words, leaving only shaking hands and blood rushing to his face. Hajime grinned for the first time in a while.
"I.. I feel it too, Komaeda. I never thought you did too."
"Well.. You know what this means, right?"
Again, Hajime shook his head.
Komaeda sat on his knees, leaning closer to Hajime. He planted a kiss on his cheek, then retracted, smiling. "It means we love each other. Usually, when the feeling of love is mutual between two people, they start dating."
Komaeda took his free hand and carefully lifted Hajime's chin so their eyes locked.
"So, Hajime.. what do you say? Will you go out with me?"
A wide grin spread across Hajime's face, before he lunged forward and kissed Komaeda, shoving both of them down on the bed. Komaeda giggled and put his arms around Hajime, who smiled through the kiss.
When they parted, they were both gasping for air.
"By the way, I heard you singing." Hajime said, breathless.
Komaeda's already red face got even brighter. "Oh.. You did?"
"Mhm. Which is why I have a request for you."
"What would that be?"
Hajime curled up next to Komaeda, burying his face in his chest. "Sing me to sleep."
Komaeda smiled again, stroking Hajime's hair. "Anything for you."