Sakura's pov
I'm not sure how to describe this feeling. It's clawing at my insides….tearing apart my soul. And yet…it's strangely beautiful. I watch him constantly. That far away look in eyes that reveal nothing. Impenetrable, frozen marble that should not belong on the face of any human being. And yet….I am sure I have never in my life seen eyes so beautiful.
In class…he always looks outside…eyes focused on a nameless destination. He gazes at the sky…as if tracing some invisible constellation….and I can hear my heart breaking.
His fingers are long…delicate…almost femininely fragile. He holds the paintbrush as if it were a new born child….tenderly…sweetly. And when he touches the canvas….its magic. His art is touchingly beautiful. When one lays their eyes upon his paintings…they are immediately reduced to tears. He draws angels….children…and somehow manages to condense 'love' into one picture of unspeakable beauty. I gaze at my own canvas….dark…ugly….lonely…. and I am overcome with shame. I am so angry…so very angry. I rip out this trash and throw it out. The teacher screams in horror. She hurriedly rushes over to me and asks me why I threw out such a magnificent painting. All I can do is gaze at her blankly…a strange emptiness overtaking my entire being…and run out of the room that is suffocating me. He sees me run…and he comes after me. I run out of that building…where I feel like dying…and he embraces me. In the pouring rain…he takes me into the warmth of his arms…and for that moment…I feel content. And yet I know…I know that such a feeling will not last. Soon I'll have to go back into that room where I am analyzed and prodded like some insect under a microscope… and face the inescapable reality that is my life. But for this one minute…I will surrender myself to his warmth…even though I know that this love will never happen. I will allow myself to believe in this dream…just for those few, precious seconds that I am in his arms. And I will pretend…I will pretend that the name he is whispering so tenderly is not mine.
"Sakura"
Because he knows. He knows as much as I do. This love….this love is forbidden.