Everything You Want – Chapter One

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I know it's a little later than I claimed it would be, but hey, it's done now. I have this story all mapped out from beginning to end, so if things go according to plan it should cap out at sixteen chapters and an epilogue. It's a motley of pairings, so if you're a diehard shipper of any one pairing you may be upset at the twists and turns of this fic. This is set in an alternate late season four. All else should become clear as you read. Happy reading :)

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Rachel entered the coffeehouse, pleased to be off from work, after an especially grueling day. She had been ordered by Mr. Waltham to sort out a dozen boxes of tangled thongs. It had ended up taking all day. She wasn't about to complain to her friends about it, either. She knew Chandler would have some comment ready for her. Though she supposed if he tried, she could always remind him he was more than a little familiar with incidents involving thongs. Especially those of the hot pink variety.

Rachel dragged herself towards the seating area, initially pleased to see several of her friends sitting around the orange velvet couch, until she noticed Emily next to Ross. Huffing a sigh, and forcing a smile on her face, and acknowledging her friends various greetings, with an 'I'm tired' grunt, she plopped into the only available seating. Right next to Ross and Emily. Naturally.

She attempted to ignore Ross's arm around his fiancée and their cuddly demeanor. She was not in the mood to deal with them or their stupid, stupid engagement right now. She just wanted coffee, and maybe, to throw something heavy at Emily.

Well, at least she could satisfy one of those desires. She signaled to Gunther, who all but tripped over his own feet in his rush to take her order.

"What can I get for you, Rachel?" he asked, smiling at her fondly, holding his notepad eagerly at the ready, hanging on her every word.

"Nonfat Latte?" She half-asked, half-told. "No, wait!" she called, amending, before he could turn to go fulfill the request, "Regular latte, double whipped cream, with chocolate shavings."

Chandler, who was sitting squished in the green chair adjacent to the couch with Monica, raised an eyebrow at Rachel questioningly, "Regular Latte? As in not nonfat and whipped cream and chocolate? Must've been a bad day."

Rachel sighed, flopping deeper into the couch, "That about covers it."

"Aww, honey," Monica said sympathetically, "You want to talk about it?" she asked, garnering several mumbling agreements from the others, including Emily. Stupid British twit and her fake friendliness.

"Really, really, not," she retorted, "Let's just say there were thongs involved."

"Thongs?" Joey asked, a massive grin on his face, "How can that possibly be bad?" he wondered.

Chandler grinned similarly to his friend, and opened his mouth to comment. Before he could, Rachel tilted her head at him, questioning, "Do you really want to make a joke about this? I have plenty of ammunition geared towards you on this particular subject, buddy."

Chandler smiled innocently and shut his mouth, pretending to zip it closed. "Consider the subject vetoed," he added, a smirk on his face. Monica laughed and rolled her eyes at him, elbowing him lightly. In spite of the bad day, Rachel couldn't help the smile that overcame her face at their easy affection.

She smiled and thanked Gunther, as he handed her a cup of coffee, grinning at her indulgently. Totally oblivious to the waiter fawning over her, she turned back to her friends, nearly splashing herself with scalding hot coffee when she caught sight of Ross and Emily kissing. Did they have to be so obvious about it?

Chandler and Monica seemed to notice her look of distaste towards the couple, and looked at her sympathetically. Joey remained oblivious, munching on a cookie from the plateful in front of him.

Finally breaking away, Ross and Emily giggled like a couple of teenagers. Ross apologized for them, "Sorry, guys. You know that this is Emily's last night in New York, before she heads back to London for a bit. Actually, do you guys mind if we take off early? We want to spend some time alone together before she leaves," he explained, squeezing his fiancée's hand gently. Rachel fought not to roll her eyes. At least she wouldn't have to watch them, she thought optimistically. That did little to quell her jealousies, though. Alone time. Stupid euphemisms.

"Nice!" Joey commented seedily, "Have fun, dude!"

Monica and Chandler glanced at Rachel hesitantly, before answering, "Yeah, no problem!" "Have fun, you guys!" Rachel remained silent, smiling tightly, trying to quell her desires to strangle Emily.

"I'll see you all in a week or so, then," Emily said, smiling at them, and hugging Monica, who she was closest to, goodbye, "Bye guys."

"Have a safe flight to London," Monica told her. Emily nodded in thanks, grasping Ross' hand tightly in her own. Cuddling up against one another, they exited the coffeehouse, heading for his apartment.

Oblivious to Rachel's pain over the subject, Joey grinned as the door slammed behind them, "Ross is gonna get lucky tonight!"

"Dude!" Chandler cried in a strained whisper, tilting his head subtly in Rachel's direction, implying Joey should be a little more sensitive.

Joey looked at him confused, the implication flying right over his head. "What?!"

Rachel rolled her eyes, but smiled at Chandler, gratefully, anyway. "Don't worry about it, Chandler. I'm fine, really. They're getting married. I'm going to have to learn to live with it, eventually, right?"

Joey gasped, now that it had been spelled out for him. "You're not over Ross?" he wondered loudly.

"Shh!" Rachel hissed, "Say that louder will you? It's not like that, anyway. It's only lingering feelings. I'm over him." Monica looked at her doubtfully, "No, really, I am!"

"So you're really dealing with this okay?" Monica asked, worried for her roommate, "Because we're all worried about you. Phoebe mentioned something, as well."

"I'm fine," Rachel said firmly, "I just had a bad day, and everything is setting me off. I just want to go home and sleep it off. Tomorrow will be better, right?"

"Yeah!" Chandler claimed, a touch of darkness to his eyes, "That's how unrequited feelings, work, right? They lessen as time goes by."

"Whoa, I think we're getting ahead of ourselves!" Rachel insisted, "There's no unrequited feelings… just… lingering feelings."

Chandler smirked, muttering sarcastically, "Because that's not the same at all. Sorry, I didn't make the distinction."

Monica leaned against Chandler, who wrapped an arm around her affectionately. She tapped his knee in agreement with what he had said, "He's right, honey… from our side of the fence it seems like there's a little more going on."

Chandler smirked, "If you looked at Emily any more cattily, well, I think you'd be in danger of actually becoming a cat."

"Whatever," Rachel scoffed, "You guys have no idea what you're talking about, You're imagining it all, because you assume Ross and Rachel equals jealous mess. That's not fair. Ross and I are perfectly capable of being civilized adults, even after our breakup!"

"Well, we know Ross is," Joey smirked, causing Rachel to glare at him. He cowered under her gaze, "Or, uh, not."

"Whatever," Rachel repeated, dismissing him.

They all sat in silence for a few moments, until Chandler, never one to be able to deal with quiet, asked loudly, "I'm going up to get a drink. Anyone want anything?"

"I'm good," Rachel huffed, still reeling over her friends' accusations.

"Got my cookies!"

"I'll have a tea?" Monica asked, smiling at him, thanking him for the offer.

He grinned back, unconsciously, his smile just short of goofy. "Sure thing. I'll be right back with your order, milady." Monica laughed as he disappeared up towards the counter.

Rachel raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow, as she watched him go, a broad smile firmly on his face. Something was definitely up. Could he have feelings for...? Nah. The thought was almost absurd. Monica had–

"Hey guys!" Monica and Rachel turned, to find Pete standing over them.

"Hi!" Monica gushed, standing up to greet her boyfriend, kissing his cheek, "How was work?"

"Hi," Rachel echoed, glancing quickly over her shoulder at Chandler, who was leaning over the front counter, talking to Gunther.

"Work was, uh, intense," Pete explained, answering Monica's question, "We've got this merger going on with a software company right now, and their legal team is giving us hell… it's messy. You don't want to hear about that, though."

Rachel groaned in agreement, "Yeah, I think we all have plenty of work problems to go around. And other problems, for that matter."

"Still upset about Ross?" Pete asked, his tone serious.

Rachel looked at him, surprised he knew about her and Ross at all. She glared at Monica, knowing she was the source of gossip. "How come everyone seems to think all my problems revolve around Ross? I have a life outside him, you know! I'm over Ross."

Pete raised his hands defensively, "Sorry, sorry. Was just asking. Monica didn't have to say anything, I was calling it like I thought I saw it. I guess I was wrong."

The tension of the moment was broken when Chandler approached from the counter, carefully balancing a few drinks. "Here ya go, Mon," he said, smiling at her brightly as he handed her the beverage he'd purchased for her. When he caught sight of Pete, sitting on the arm of her chair his smile faltered, and he nodded at him in acknowledgement of his presence. Pete returned the gesture, unaware of anything amiss.

Chandler plopped into the seat next to Rachel, a little forlornly, and handed her a double shot of espresso. "I know you said you didn't want anything," he explained, "but I thought you might be able to use a boost."

Rachel smiled at him appreciatively, accepting the coffee cup. "That was sweet of you, Chandler."

Chandler shrugged self-depreciatingly. "Know any hot women you want to tell that to?" he asked, taking a sip of his coffee. If Rachel hadn't already been watching him closely she would have missed his glance quickly flicking to Monica, before returning to his cup.

Rachel dropped her smile sympathetically, and asked him gently, "Not doing so well on the dating front, huh?"

Chandler shook his head, "That's putting it nicely. Since Kathy, my love life has been crash and burn. Even with girls who I thought I might have had a shot with, who've known me for a while, and haven't run screaming yet… It all just sucks. Dating sucks."

Rachel nodded. She hadn't missed the vague allusion. Unsure how to broach the topic, she asked carefully, "Are we talking anyone specific, here? A coworker?" Getting no response she added meaningfully, "A friend?"

Chandler flushed deeply, and Rachel sensed he was fighting to keep his gaze from shifting to Monica. "No," he said firmly, "No one specific."

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Rachel entered her apartment, surprised to find Monica already home from work, watching a movie with Chandler. "What are you guys doing?"

"Watching Sleepless in Seattle," Monica answered, sniffing back tears, "I love this movie!" She cuddled against Chandler, and pulled the blanket they were huddled under tighter around them. Rachel glanced at their cuddly position, her gossip's eye appraising the situation. They did look pretty close… and Chandler looked pretty happy.

The more she observed them together, the more sure she was that her suspicion that Chandler felt something for Monica was more than just that. She'd have to talk to Joey. Surely if Chandler would have talked to anyone, it would be his bestfriend and roommate of five years.

Rachel raised her eyebrows at Chandler teasingly, "Really? How'd she convince you to watch that, Mr. Manly Man?"

He shrugged nonchalantly and brushed off the teasing, answering honestly. "It's what Monica wanted to watch. I do listen to my friends, occasionally, you know, Rach."

Rachel fought down a smirk, and repressed the urge to make a snide comment about how his soft spot for Monica made that kind of consideration on his part happen with her much more often, but figured with Monica listening in, that wouldn't be fair to him. He should be able to tell her in his own way.

"You want to watch with us, Rach?" Monica wondered, "It's just getting to the good part."

Rachel shook her head. "Nah, I'll leave Tom and Meg to you guys. There's something I need to talk to Joey about, anyway. I'll catch up with you later," she promised.

She walked across the hall, and knocked on the door briefly, not even waiting for Joey to answer before barging in, already calling out his name.

Joey swiveled in his barcalounger to face her. A question spread across his face when he noticed the way she was looking at him, and he threw his pizza slice back in the box. "What's up, Rach?"

Rachel sat in the matching chair, and turned it to face him, asking bluntly, "How does Chandler feel about Monica?"

"What?!" Joey screeched, clearly unprepared for the question, "Why would you ask me that? I don't know anything," he tittered uncomfortably, snatching back his slice of pizza and taking a bite. Rachel suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. Joey was a terrible liar, how he managed to act well enough to land himself a job was a mystery.

Playing coy, Rachel looked down at her hands, picking a perfectly manicured fingernail innocently, "Oh, well, I because I was just in my apartment and they're in there watching a movie, and Chandler might've said something…" she trailed off.

Joey looked at her curiously, nearly choking on his pizza. "He did?!" he wondered, "I didn't think he'd ever tell her!"

Even though she had started the little game, Rachel was shocked to hear her suspicions confirmed out loud. "So he does feel something for her!"

Realizing he'd been tricked, Joey tried to backtrack, "What! No! What I meant was that I didn't think he'd ever tell her that he really likes being friends with her and nothing more," he explained, forcing away a grimace, looking at Rachel hopefully.

"Joey!"

"Okay, fine!" Joey conceded, knowing there was no way out of admitting the truth. "Chandler had feelings for Monica."

"Had?" Rachel asked, surprised. She had gotten the impression his feelings were very much 'on'.

"Look," Joey explained through mouthfuls of pizza, "It's not something we talk about often, okay? He just kinda mentions it once in a while, when he's got it really bad. From the way he talks about it, it seems like it comes and goes. She's his dreamgirl… the one he measures the potential candidates for 'love of his life' off of, you know? He doesn't think he stands a shot with the real thing, so he forces down his feelings and tries to find someone who lives up to the fantasy."

"So he is in love with her?" Rachel prodded.

Joey shrugged, "I don't know. I mean, he never says it like that. Guys don't really talk about that kind of stuff, and he hasn't mentioned her in months. I do know he hasn't slept with her," Joey added helpfully.

Rachel scoffed and rolled her eyes, "Men are pigs." Joey shrugged, not prepared to debate the topic. Rachel wasn't ready to give up on her quest for information, however. "He must be feeling something," She persisted, "How do you not know if your bestfriend is in love with your neighbour?! This is news!"

Joey shrugged again. "Chandler will tell us if he wants to." He looked at Rachel, alarmed. "You aren't going to tell him I told you, are you?"

"No," Rachel said, "But maybe Monica should know?"

"Rach," Joey said, sounding surprisingly serious, "I don't think it's really our place to get involved, do you? I mean, Monica has Pete… is it fair for us to mess that up for her? Even if it would be cool to see Monica and Chandler hook up."

Rachel sighed, her enthusiasm deflated. On her mission to find out what exactly Chandler's feelings were for Monica, she had completely forgotten about Pete. "I guess not. This sucks."

"Why do you care so much, anyway?" Joey asked, devouring another slice of pizza, "You've got enough on your hands dealing with your own issues with Ross and Em–"

"Don't even say her name," Rachel groaned, adding, "I figured I could help Chandler. Since my own love life is a bust."

"Want me to hook you up?" Joey asked, sympathetic.

Rachel laughed, "Set up by you? No thanks, I'm not quite that desperate, yet. I've heard enough horror stories from Chandler to last me a lifetime."

Joey pouted. "The last girl I set him up with wasn't that bad," he claimed, going into a spiel about how Chandler was just too picky and a 'big forehead' was not a just reason to dislike a girl. A minute into the conversation Rachel had completely tuned him out, her thoughts instead focused on what she was going to do with her newfound information. Should she tell Chandler she knew?

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Rachel tossed and turned in her bed, unable to get to sleep. No position seemed comfortable enough. She knew that was only part of the reason, though. Her conversation with Joey and her feelings for Ross were weighing on her mind, as well. Why was it fair that people like she and Chandler had to suffer through unrequited love, while others got away scot-free? Life wasn't fair, she decided.

Upset at the revelation she buried her head under her pillow, trying to push the unwanted thoughts from her mind, but that did nothing to help. Frustrated, she sat up in bed, and flung her pillow against the wall. That made her feel a little better, so she snatched up a shoe from the floor beside her bed, and flung that at the wall too, completely forgetting that her roommate was probably asleep on the other side of that wall.

It was only after she had flung the second shoe, and Monica burst into her room, worried, that Rachel realized she'd probably woken her up.

"Oh, Mon," Rachel apologized to her roommate, "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up."

Monica carefully sat on the bed next to her, and touched her knee gently, "Are you okay? With all this stuff going on recently… it must be hard for you. I've been busy with Pete, recently, and we haven't really talked about it."

Rachel sniffed away tears, not wanting to seem like anymore of a pathetic charity case than she already was. "I'm okay," she said quietly, "I just had a bad day. I learned something about a friend today that kinda made me reevaluate my own life."

"About Ross?" Monica ventured hesitantly.

"No," Rachel sighed. "A- a guy from, ah, work. Though Ross is the real source of my problems, I guess," she agreed, downtrodden.

"Oh, Rach," Monica comforted her, "You'll find your perfect guy, someday. So what if Ross isn't it? There are tons of other great guys out there. Look at me. I thought I was in the same boat after Richard, and that I'd never find anyone… but I've got Pete now."

Seeing the opportunity to deflect the conversation from her feelings, Rachel asked, "But do you really love him like you loved Richard? I mean, we all see you together, Mon. Sometimes the way you act towards one another seems more like a business transaction," she claimed. "You didn't even like him until he kissed you for the first time! Are you really telling me you think Pete's the one?"

Monica faltered. "I – uh, I don't know," she answered honestly. "Some days I do, some I don't. Most the time, I'm not really sure. Relationships need time to grow and adapt, though, I don't want to rush it. We're happy, I don't want to ruin that."

Rachel nodded, "At least someone is. I'm miserable. Chandler has been lately, too," she added hesitantly, wanting to interject him into the conversation and see how Monica would react. "It seems like he has been ever since Kathy, I guess…"

"Yeah," Monica said quietly, and opened her mouth as if she were about to add something, but closed it instead.

"What?" Rachel asked.

Monica flushed, "Well, this is going to sound stupid, but sometimes I used to think that maybe Chandler and I could've worked as a couple, and he could have been my 'one'. I mean, I don't think either of us would ever have tried anything, and especially not after what happened with you and Ross… but some days it seemed like potential was there, you know? He can be quite sweet, when he's not being an idiot. Anyway, like I was saying, it's stupid. I've got Pete now and I'm happy with him," she reiterated.

"Yeah," Rachel agreed, her head spinning from Monica's revelation, "happy. We should probably get back to bed, Mon. Thanks for talking with me."

Monica smiled at her, "No problem, you're like my sister. If you ever need to talk, I'm here, okay?"

Rachel nodded, "Okay, thanks. Goodnight." Monica echoed the statement, and left.

Rachel flopped back on her bed. Things were getting complicated.

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Thanks for reading :)

I'd love if you'd leave a review, especially since this is a first chapter, it's important to me to get feedback on whether I should pursue this or move onto another story. So… let me know what you think.