Characters: Blaine, Sebastian, the Warblers (mentioned)
Rating: T
Story Summary: The Warblers take Blaine to Mexico for his bachelor party. Unfortunately, what happens in Mexico can't stay in Mexico.
Chapter Summary: Blaine wakes up the morning after his bachelor party with Sebastian in his bed. That can't be a good thing. Can it?
Note: I know this form of the prompt "marriage" has been done at nauseum, but I hope you enjoy my version. Please remember that this is not only Canon Divergent but AU as I took a lot of liberties with some of the laws in Mexico.
It was Jeff and Nick's idea to throw a bachelor party for Blaine. It would most likely be their only chance to have one with just the Warblers. Even though they had helped with the proposal, Kurt really didn't like them very much.
Beat's family had a beach house in Cabo and an upcoming five-day weekend provided a perfect opportunity for them to get away. Amazingly, all of their parents had no problem with their sons going off to party in a foreign country where the legal drinking age is 18. The plan was to fly down on Wednesday, hang out on the beach on Thursday, have the actual party on Friday, recover Saturday before flying back home on Sunday and going back to school Monday. It was a good plan…in theory.
Saturday morning Blaine woke up with the worst hangover of his life. He was pretty sure it was from all the tequila shots he downed at his party, he only wished he could remember. All he wanted to do was lay in bed until the pounding in his head stopped. The problem was he really needed to pee.
When he rolled over to go to the bathroom he winced from a pain that could only mean one thing. He reached over and yes, there was another body in his bed. Despite all the pain, he sat up and opened his eyes to find out who he was.
Of course, it was Sebastian.
Damn it!
"Uuuuuugggg, Sebastian, wake up" Blaine groaned while shaking the boy next to him.
"No. Stop shaking. Too early. Head hurts" Sebastian groaned back and then the reality of the situation hit him. Needless to say, he was quite surprised "Killer, what the hell are you doing in my bed?"
"Evidently waking up from a night of drunken debauchery that led to me cheating on Kurt! Again!"
"Not so loud" Sebastian whined "And you don't know that."
"Um…the pain in my ass, the hickeys all over your neck and the three open condom wrappers on the nightstand next to you are pretty good hints."
"Three times, huh?"
Blaine smacked him across the chest eliciting another groan "Shut up. What happened last night?"
Sebastian forced his body to sit up and looked over at Blaine "I have no idea. Trust me, if I remembered having sex with you three times in one night I would be high fiving myself right now."
Blaine started to shake his head, but soon realized that made him nauseous "Oh god, Sebastian. What the hell am I going to do? I have to tell Kurt that I cheated on him AGAIN and this time it actually was with YOU."
Even though Kurt was nowhere good enough for Blaine, Sebastian didn't want Blaine to go through that again "You don't need to tell him. No one ever needs to know besides the two of us. The other guys were in just as bad of shape as we were last night. They probably don't remember anything either. We just need to come up with a plan to explain why you're in my room and I have hickeys all over my neck."
"Sebastian…"
"No, Blaine this will work as long as you don't let the guilt eat you alive."
Could he live with it? Technically, he didn't know that he cheated on Kurt even though the signs pointed to it "Do you have any suggestions?"
"How about this? We tell everyone that you pulled some guy off of me and told me I was too good for randoms. The imaginary guy is responsible for the hickeys."
"You are too good for randoms."
"Well, you're too good for Hummel."
An awkward silence came down between them as there was really no coming back from those statements. Finally, Blaine spoke up "I think the story will work. I'm going to take a quick shower so I can wake up and not smell like sex. Do you have something I could put on for now?"
"Yeah, I've got some shorts and a t-shirt you may not drown in. Go start your shower. I'll close my eyes." Once Sebastian heard the door shut, he got out of bed to grab some fresh underwear and something to put on for himself as well as Blaine. When he closed the drawer, for the first time he noticed a ring made of seashells was on his finger. "Why the hell would I buy this?" he asked out loud "Oh yeah, drunken blackout." He started to take it off but was distracted by a piece of paper on the dresser. Panic overwhelmed him as he picked it up. He may not read Spanish, but he immediately knew what the piece of paper was.
"Blaine! Get in here! Now!"
"What?" Blaine came running out of the bathroom. He could hear the panic in Sebastian's voice. He could also see that Sebastian was still naked.
"Um, are you by chance wearing a seashell ring?" Sebastian asked, trying not to notice that Blaine was dripping wet and only wearing a towel.
"Yeah" Blaine was confused at why his ring would be such a big deal "I just figured one of the guys bought it for me as a gag gift."
"It's not a gag" Sebastian said as he held up his left hand to show his matching ring and his right hand to show the piece of paper "Because I'm pretty sure this is our marriage license."
"Ohmygod, Ohmygod, Ohmygod" Blaine repeated over and over again as he began to pace "Sebastian, are you sure?"
"I'm pretty sure. The address to where this supposedly happened is on the license. Go back to your room and get dressed. Give me 15 minutes and I'll meet you out front. We have enough problems right now without the guys seeing my neck. Hopefully they're all still passed out or are on the beach. Leave them a note saying we went out and will be back soon."
"And what reason should I give them for us leaving?"
"I don't know. Oh, tell them we went to discuss what happened with the Slushie. None of them would want anything to do with that."
"Sebastian…"
"Blaine, stop. I'm just as freaked out as you are. While you're there worrying about Hummel, I have my own problems. All I can think about right now is how pissed my father is going to be, not that I got married but that I got married without a prenup!"
"Slushie talk. Got it! See you in 15 minutes." As Blaine snuck back to his room he berated himself for being so selfish. He hadn't even taken a moment to consider how this affected Sebastian. Yes, he had just fucked up his life, literally, but it didn't mean that Sebastian needed to be drug down with him.
Both of them were able to get out of the house without seeing anyone. It was a short walk into town and about a half hour later they found the address on the license. It definitely was not what they expected.
"This can't be right. This looks like a voodoo shop" Blaine whispered.
"Santería" a beautiful young woman corrected him as she walked into the shop from a back room "I expected to see you both again, but I did not believe it would be this soon."
"You know us?" Sebastian asked.
"Of course, you are Señor Blaine and Señor Sebastian Anderson-Smythe. I am Rosa. I was a witness at your wedding last night. You don't remember?"
Sebastian's signature smirk appeared for the first time since all of this began "Anderson-Smythe?"
"A before S" Blaine murmured and then tried to determine if that was a statement or a memory. He quickly covered up by asking "Um…Rosa, you said you were a witness at our wedding?"
"Si, my mother and I were your witnesses and my father was your officiant."
Blaine stumbled back and sat in a chair. Despite everything he knew, that last statement of Rosa's made it all real. He and Sebastian were married. Sebastian wasn't much better, but when he looked over at Blaine he knew he would need to be the one to ask the questions for a while "Is your father around? See, Blaine and I were a little drunk last night and might not have been in the best state of mind to consent to marriage."
Rosa began to giggle "No Señor Sebastian, you were not a little drunk. You were what you Americans call shit-faced."
"Then how could your father have married us?"
"Your true love story."
"Our what?!" The boys spat out in unison.
"Your true love story" Rosa repeated, giggling again like it was the most obvious thing in the world "Many people come in here, insisting to be married while under the influence of the tequila. When that happens, we have them tell their true love story to my Abuela. If she says that their story is indeed one of true love then my father will marry the couple."
As if on cue, a woman (who Blaine and Sebastian silently agreed had to be at least 100 years old) in a traditional Mexican dress shuffled into the room with the assistance of a walking stick. When she saw the two of them she gave a toothless grin and motioned for Sebastian to sit next to Blaine. It took her a while, but eventually she stood in front of them, patted their faces and called them mis hermosos niños. The woman who they assumed was Rosa's Abuela sat in a chair and motioned for Rosa to join her. The entire scene was a bit surreal to Blaine and Sebastian, but the women across from them smiled at what they saw. It was clear to them that neither boy realized that they had been holding hands since the moment Sebastian sat down.
Blaine regained his ability to speak so he asked "How would she know our…true love story…was true?" The true love story part had been extremely difficult to say. Yes, there had always been something between himself and Sebastian, but true love? He loved Kurt. At least he thought he did.
"Abuela is a blessed with a psychic Mexican third-eye." Rosa told him.
Blaine knew his mind was still a little fuzzy, but he was sure he had heard of that before. But where? After promising he would figure it out later, he turned to Sebastian and asked "What the hell did we tell her?"
Abuela began to speak very quickly, in Spanish of course, so neither of them understood what she was saying. After a couple of minutes, she stopped and signaled for Rosa to translate for her "She told me to remind you of your true love story. I translated it for you when you told Abuela. She is afraid that you will not be strong enough and will let others pull you apart."
"We have to know" Sebastian said and Blaine nodded his agreement. They were ready to hear it. How bad could it be?
Abuela stared at them while Rosa began "The two of you fell in love the first moment you looked into each other's eyes, but Señor Blaine was under the spell of the Evil Troll Gayface."
Sebastian let out a loud laugh at the mention of the name they had given Kurt, but quickly apologized (even though he didn't mean it) and asked Rosa to continue.
"Señor Sebastian tried to free Señor Blaine but Evil Troll Gayface had too strong of a hold. That was when Señor Sebastian made a special potion to try and break the spell. However, the potion hit Señor Blaine instead of Evil Troll Gayface. Since the special potion was only meant for evil trolls, it hurt Señor Blaine very badly due to his pure and loving heart."
"I really am sorry about that" Sebastian mumbled.
"I know you are" Blaine answered and then gave Sebastian's hand a quick squeeze to further his point.
"Señor Sebastian's heart shattered when he hurt the boy he loved, which made the spell Evil Troll Gayface had on Señor Blaine stronger. He tried one more time to break the spell, but Señor Blaine no longer remembered their love and the Great Yellow-haired Trouty Mouth was able to convince him to go back to Evil Troll Gayface's Kingdom."
"You were obviously in charge of naming the characters in this story" Blaine whispered to which Sebastian just nodded and continued to listen.
What could he say? It was a good story.
"Then came the day before Señor Blaine would be betrothed to Evil Troll Gayface. He went to ask his friends for help and when he did, he found Señor Sebastian there as well. They found out very quickly that, even though they had been apart, their connection remained strong. So strong that the connection pulled them into a loving embrace like, um, what is…?"
"Magnets" they said in unison causing Rosa and Abuela to smile.
"Si, yes, magnets. That embrace made them realize that they still loved each other. Señor Blaine tried to break the spell, but he could not, and he and Evil Troll Gayface became engaged to be married. But the good news was that Señor Sebastian and Señor Blaine had very good friends and they saw the love the two of them shared. They were able to find just enough magic to break Evil Troll Gayface's spell but only for a short time. They would have to fly to a special place and it would last only five days, but they knew that they had to take this chance to be with each other. When they arrived in the special place, they were so happy but also sad because they knew they would have to go back soon. That was when they found a new potion that made them unafraid of Evil Troll Gayface."
"Tequila" they agreed. That was no doubt about that one.
"It was during that time they decided to get married, that way even though Señor Blaine would have to go be with Evil Troll Gayface, Señor Blaine and Señor Sebastian would always belong to each other."
Neither of them knew what to say. They couldn't deny that this was their story, well without the evil troll part (although that was only Blaine's opinion). How could it be a story of true love?
"Rosa, Abuela, that is our story, but when we get back home I will have to go be with Kur…Evil Troll Gayface" Blaine kept looking over at Sebastian as he began to plead their case, thankful that he wasn't making comments that could make their situation worse "Is there any way we could be granted an annulment?"
Rosa relayed the question to her grandmother, but she shook her head and answered "No, no, no". She then pointed at her forehead and then over at Sebastian. "A marriage can be annulled if it was not consummated on the wedding night. However, Abuela says that her physic Mexican third-eye says that's not the case with you two. Plus, the bites on Señor Sebastian's neck show you were together."
Panic overtook Blaine once more "We have to have an annulment! If we were to get divorced it would show up when I go get a marriage license with Ku…him. And Sebastian, your father would find out about the whole no pre-nup thing. Isn't there another way?"
After Blaine asked that, for the first time since he had sat next to him, Sebastian let go of his hand.
Rosa translated what Blaine had said, however, Abuela did not look happy when she replied to the question.
"There is one other way for the marriage to be annulled" Rosa told them "When you return to your home, you cannot see or communicate with each other for one year. You cannot even ask friends about each other. You have to cut each other out of your lives completely. Then on one year and one day from the day you part, you come back here and if you still want it, you will be granted the annulment."
"How will you know…?" Sebastian began to ask, but Abuela pointed at her forehead making the rest of the question unnecessary. So instead he turned to Blaine and asked "What do you think?"
"I'm pretty sure I can hold off the actual wedding planning for a year. And, New York is a big place so it's very unlikely that we would run into each other. This shouldn't be too hard."
"It will be easier than you think since I'm not going to school in New York."
"What do you mean?" Blaine was in shock. No, he was downright flabbergasted. Whenever they discussed college, Sabastian always said he was going to New York. "You were accepted to Columbia."
"I was also accepted at Harvard. I'm going to Boston."
"When did you decide this?"
"A couple of weeks ago."
Blaine didn't have a response for that.