Wrote this for the deatheaterdrabs over at LiveJournal, I got four out 10 votes but I didn't quite make it. I changed the name of the drabble but other then that, it's all the same.

We had two pictures for a prompt about a crack!fic, or to keep it evil and real they gave us a quote by Adolf Hitler. Eventually I'll make a drabble based of that quote (I'm some how related to his great grandfater actually...) but untill then this will have to do!

Oh, and a little warning for slighlty crude humor...I apologize.

Title: His Dark Roses

Words: 307

.In an expensively furnished room sat a handful of idiots that called themselves the Death Eaters, each one even more idiotic then next. The leader of the gang sat at the head of the table while the owner of said room sat to the side, a note unknowingly glued to his back read, 'princess'.

"Now listen up my Dark Roses." Voldemort said, his nose in the air, "Because of your stupidity I'm low on minions. So, to fix this problem," he reached down and pulled out a book, "I have written this, 'Horcruxus for dummies'."

"Oh, it's beautiful my Lord!" Bellatrix gushed, "Wonderful, fabulous, pristine-"

"Shut up, Bella!" Narcissa snapped, inspecting her nails in a bored manner.

"Yes, shut it you grovelling temptress." Lucius backed her up, fluffing his hair in a hand held mirror.

Bellatrix snarled, taking the mirror from his grasp and smashing it over his head, "You shut up, you long haired albino!"

"Oi! That was my mirror!"

"Just use reparo on it, you sniffling baboon."

"Guys." Voldemort sighed, pinching his nose. What was I thinking when I hired these idiots? Why the hell did I pick these bubbling buffoons.

"Reparo?" Lucius asked looking baffled.

"Of course you wouldn't know, you always had your nose glued to a mirror!" Bellatrix snarled.

"Your one to talk. You were always in some closet thinking of the Dark Lord with a finger up your-"

"Whoa! Too much information!" Draco yelled.

Oh yeah, that's why I hired her. "Alright you two-"

"Well it was you and Cissy who could always be found in a broom closet getting off with each other!"

"Bella, my son is in the room!" Narcissa interrupted.

"My ears, my ears!" Draco moaned.

"Yeah, watch it bitch!" Lucius piped.

"How dare you! Avada Kedavra!"

"Avada Kedavra"

"This is why I wrote the book." Voldemort sighed.