Princess Peach and Princess Daisy sighed as they put down their cards, crumpled their one-millionth notepads, and tossed them into Peach's pink waste basket. They had tossed them so many times, they had stopped missing a while ago.
The reason for their frustrations was that they were playing a game. A board game. But, they needed three players, and they were only two. More frustrating to them was that the board game was really fun to play. Fun, addictive, and logical. You had to use your brain for strategy and the process of elimination.
The board game they were playing was called Clue.
They were introduced to it not long ago. A couple weeks ago, the princesses were sulking around the corridors in Peach's castle, having absolutely nothing to do while not being kidnapped. Their sulking became so utterly unbearable to the poor servants that worked at the castle that Toadsworth decided to take action. Beckoning the royalties to follow him, they watched curiously as Toadsworth hobbled toward a closet. Grabbing a stool, he reached as far as he could and somehow managed to yank a rectangular box. It was labelled Clue. Toadsworth explained to them that while on a trip as an ambassador, he bought Clue to support an old friend. It was year 1949 when he bought it, of course, he was using the other world's method of time, but he continued to explain it was when he was Peach and Daisy's age, so they estimated it was quite a long time ago.
After explaining the rules, the princesses decided to give it a shot and quickly realized that Toadsworth had selected a board game that was quite superior in terms of enjoyment from their experience.
What he failed to mention was that he was an unbeatable opponent.
The time spent buying all the editions and playing an uncountable number of games made him skilled enough to have all the information he needed in only a couple of turns.
And. He. Never. Made. An. Incorrect. Accusation.
Anyway, the princesses were absolutely hooked on Clue. And they had no one to play with.
Toadsworth was always up for a game, but since the outcome was already known to all, they didn't really want to play with him. Daisy had once noted Peach had definitely inherited her competitive streak from Toadsworth, and it was clear the streak did not fade away with age.
Toadette and Toad would play occasionally, but only once a week at the most.
Mario and Luigi never played. They couldn't. They were always helping others and never took any lazy days to relax.
Rosalina claimed she would play, but since she orbited the cosmos to visit Earth only once in a lifetime, they would never truly know.
The princesses once tried playing with Waluigi and Wario, but found out the hard way the Anti Bros. didn't take kindly to losing. In layman's terms , losing a game= ripping the board to pieces. They wouldn't make the same mistake twice.
Once they tried playing with Pauline, and it was all going pretty well. She had a fair chance, but she was beatable. Unfortunately, half way through the first game, Donkey Kong broke in, snatched Pauline, and ran off. They invited her over again, several forms of apology having been sent, but they never got a reply.
They even tried playing with Yoshi, who decided Clue was about swallowing the pieces and leaving them as eggs. That one was messy.
And so it went on, and on, and on. Failure after failure after failure every time they tried to find someone to play with.
Which brought them to now, playing with each other, but not really. The reason being was that if the other player didn't have a card, one could automatically conclude the card was involved in the case. The "games" were over with in a minute. As all hope seemed lost, Peach had an idea.
"I've got it!" she exclaimed.
"Hm?" Daisy inquired.
"Why don't we trick someone to playing with us?"
"How we would we do that?"
"Well, it's not tricking, but rather... trapping. You see, Bowser sends me letters, and as soon as I read the letter and close the envelope, I'm teleported to his location. He even gave me some after I asked, I've just never found the use for them... until now," Peach explained.
"Ah, I see..." said Daisy. "But, how are we going to ever get that envelope to the right person?"
"Don't you see, Daisy? Getting them to the right person is the whole point! All you have to do is give the envelope directions. In fact, I'll do it right now." Peach scrambled around and found a pen, along with a light pink enveloped with a heart at its tip. Grabbing a piece of paper, she began writing.
'To our most treasured guest,
I am pleased to announce that you have been chosen to spend the afternoon with me, Princess Peach. Entertainment and refreshments shall be provided. Please, no presents, your presence is all that is asked for. So, please come and enjoy yourself, and have a fantastic evening!
Yours truly,
Princess Peach.'
"Done!" she exclaimed. Placing the paper inside, she sealed the envelope. "Send this to someone who is smart enough to be a challenge, but inexperienced enough to actually lose against us in a game of Clue. Now, go!" With that, the envelope sprouted wings, and flew off.
"Now, all we have to is wait," smirked the pink princess, satisfied.
"Alright... but, what about 'refreshments'?"
"Oh, crap... Um... I'll be right back!" And with that, Princess Peach dashed off, down the stairs to retrieve "refreshments."
~Insert relatively short time skip of your choice here~
When Princess Peach trudged back up the stairs, huffing and puffing, and holding refreshments the first thing she saw was Daisy laying on the floor.
With a person laying on top of her.
"Ow..." he muttered, and, upon looking down, gasped and jumped off Daisy. "Oh my god! I'm sorry!" he said as he helped Daisy up, rubbing her back.
"It's... fine," she managed to groan out. "I'll deal with it. It was nothing, really."
"Are you kidding? I sat on you!" he exclaimed.
"I'm fine. Really."
"Okay..." he said warily. "Excuse me, miss, but, do you know how I got here? I mean, one minute I'm in my room, then poof! I'm here."
"The name's Daisy," she smiled. "Anyway, I don't really know. How did our guest arrive, Peach?"
Peach took a moment to glare at her fellow royalty, before turning her attention to her guest.
"I... uh... well... you see, I sent you here using magic."
"Magic?" he asked in disbelief.
"Magic. How else would I have got you here so quickly?"
"Hm... Okay, then... So, why was I brought here?"
"To spend the evening with Daisy and I, of course! Didn't you read the letter?" she asked, faking innocence.
"I, uh, well, you see, I was sitting my bed, on the computer, when suddenly I felt paper when I rested my hand on my bed! I... skimmed through the letter, it was something about how I was invited to spend the evening with royalty, my presence but no presents, something corny along those lines."
Daisy couldn't help but giggle while Peach did her best not to take the comment as a personal attack.
"Okay, then you know why you're here then, right?"
"Uh... I guess..." he trailed off.
"Good! Daisy, go get the Clue box!"
"Get it yourself," Daisy muttered, but none the less, dragged herself over to the box, picked it up, and placed it in-between the three of them.
"So, Bookworm, are you up for a game of logic? One to test your smarts?" Peach smirked.
Bookworm sensed "no" was not an option, so he simply nodded. "Sure. What are the rules?"
"Daisy, have you already separated the cards into piles?" asked the blonde. After receiving a nod, Peach continued to explain to her "guest."
"Okay, so clue is a board game that is a murder mystery."
Oh, this is going to be fun, Bookworm thought, but he didn't interrupt his "host." Yeah, right. In this case, host was synonymous with kidnapper and guest was more like hostage. "The object of Clue is to find who the killer is, where they committed the murder, and with what weapon. So..." Peach reached out and grabbed a detailed looking piece of paper. "This," she pointed to the piece of square paper, "is your notepad. The reason there's four squares across is so you can play four games on the same pad. Anyways, as you can see, down the rows are a list of suspects, weapons, and rooms. One of each will be placed in this special envelope," she held it up, and it was labelled 'Clue CONFIDENTIAL,' "and your goal is to find which suspect, weapon, and room is inside it. So, the possible suspects include..." Peach grabbed a pile of cards and showed them to Bookworm, "Colonel Mustard, Professor Plum, Mr. Green, Mrs. Peacock, Miss Scarlet, and Mrs. White. The possible weapons are a knife, candlestick, revolver, rope, lead pipe, and a wrench. Finally, the nine rooms are the hall, lounge, dining room, kitchen, ballroom, conservatory, billiard room, library, and study," Peach finished. "Daisy, are you done?"
"Yeah," she confirmed.
"Okay, Daisy's shuffled the deck so now there's only five suspects, guests, and eight rooms left, for a total of eighteen cards to be dealt out to us, and three inside the envelope..." Bookworm watched as Daisy regrouped the cards and dealt them out at lightning speed.
"Now that we each have six cards, oh, I forgot! Bookworm, who do you want to play as?"
"I... don't know."
"Here, let me help," urged Peach. "Miss Scarlet has the advantage of going first, and play goes clockwise from her. Mrs. Peacock has the advantage of being one space closer to a room than anyone else, and Professor Plum can move to the study quicker than anyone else, and use the secret passage to the kitchen, the hardest room to get to."
"Okay..." Bookworm said, despite the fact that he had no idea how these advantages were... advantages. "I'll choose... Miss Scarlet, because she's red and she gets to go first." Miss Scarlet had fair skin, a red dress, shiny black hair, and a beautiful face.
"Okay!" Peach said as she motioned for Daisy to sit next to her. "I choose... Mrs. Peacock," she stated while placing the Mrs. Peacock figurine on a blue space. Mrs. Peacock was covered in fabrics of all shades of blue, the only different thing being her orangish shade of hair "Bookworm, Miss Scarlet's space is right... here," Peach said, pointing to a red space right in front of Bookworm. He promptly placed his figurine on the red space.
"I guess I have to play as the old fart," Daisy sighed. "Old fart" turned out to be the nick name Daisy assigned to Mrs. White, a woman who's figurine was dressed in a maid's outfit, and she had wrinkles on her face. None the less, Daisy placed her figurine on a white space.
"Now, Bookworm, the object of Clue, like I said before, is to find who is the killer, where did they commit the murder, and with what weapon. To narrow down your choices, look at your cards. These cards could not have been involved in the case, so you can check them off."
Upon inspection of his cards, Bookworm concluded the murderer was not Mr. Green, the weapon was not the knife or the rope, nor was the crime committed in the ballroom, billiard room, or library. As an afterthought, he added a little key for himself: I/n equaled In hand. His notepad now looked like the following
His notepad looked like this:
Suspects
Colonel Mustard [ ]
Professor Plum [ ]
Mr. Green [X] I/h
Mrs. Peacock. [ ]
Miss Scarlet [ ]
Mrs. White[ ]
Weapons
Knife [X] I/h
Candlestick [ ]
Revolver [ ]
Rope [X] I/h
Lead Pipe [ ]
Wrench [ ]
Rooms
Hall [ ]
Lounge [ ]
Dining Room [ ]
Kitchen [ ]
Ballroom [X] I/h
Conservatory [ ]
Billiard Room [X] I/h
Library [X] I/h
Study [ ]
Scoping out the board, he noted the rooms. In the very center was the envelope, or "cellar." From his direction, the rooms closest to him were the lounge, hall, and study, with Miss Scarlet's starting space in between the first two. Right above the lounge was the dining room, and further up, the kitchen. Right of the kitchen was the ballroom, and Daisy's starting space was in-between the two. To the right of the ballroom was the conservatory, and below it was a small billiard room, with Peach's space in between the two. Below the billiard was a small library room, and below it was the study again.
"Done," he announced
"Great!" Daisy said. "Now, to narrow down your choices, you have to get the other players to show you their cards. To do this, you must roll the dice, go into a room, and make a suggestion. So, just for example..." Daisy moved her pawn to the ballroom, which was the closest room to it. Since I'm in the ballroom, I have to say I suggest the ballroom. You have to suggest the room you are in. Does that make sense?" Bookworm nodded and Daisy continued. "So, I suggest the crime was committed in the ballroom, by Colonel Mustard, with the revolver. At this point, the player who made the suggestion goes to the person closest to them in a clockwise direction. In my case, Peach. So if Peach has the Colonel Mustard, revolver, or ballroom cards, she has to show me one. If she has more than one, she chooses which one to show to me. If she doesn't have any, then I would ask you for cards, and then you'd do the same thing. If you don't have anything either, my turn just ends. If anyone does show a card to me, I check it off, as it wasn't involved in the crime. Remember, when someone makes a suggestion, show your card to them and only them. Also, suggestions are proven false in a clockwise direction. So, it would go, in my case, to Peach then to you. In Peach's case, she'd ask you, and then ask me. In your case, you'd ask me, and then ask Peach. Understand?"
It was an awful lot to take in, but it was straight forward enough. "Uh... yeah, I get it," mumbled Bookworm.
"Good!" Peach said. "Don't worry,we'll go easy on you. Once you think you know the three cards in the envelope, you can make an accusation you have to say who, what, and where you think the crime was committed out loud, and check inside. If you are right, you show us the cards and the game is over. If you're wrong, you're out of the game and all you do is show cards or move your pawn to a room if it's used for a suggestion. Oh, and keep in mind you can always make an accusation at the end of your turn, even after making a suggestion. Also, you can name any three elements you want, regardless of your pawn's location. If you make an incorrect accusation, your pawn must move if it's blocking a door. Oh, and during a suggestions, these come into play..." Daisy said, holding up a set of miniature weapons. "When making a suggestion, you move the weapon you said to the room, along with the pawn of the person you suggested. If it's my or Peach's pawn, we have the option of making a suggestion or rolling the dice, and vice versa. That's all, we're ready to play!" said Daisy.
That's all? thought Bookworm in disbelief. Eh, whatever. This is almost certainly a weird dream, so, who cares if I lose?
"Ahem..." Peach politely coughed. "Bookworm... since you're Miss Scarlet, you go first."
"Oh, yeah!" He grabbed a pair of black dice from Peach's hand, and rolled. A three and a five. Luckily, that was just enough for him to slide his pawn over the spaced and slightly to the left and into the lounge. "I suggest the crime was committed in the Lounge, by . . . Miss Scarlet, with the, uh, revolver." Might as well say me, he thought. He looked at Daisy, and she showed him the revolver card in cupped hands. He nodded, and then Daisy put it face down with the rest of her cards, and Bookworm marked the revolver off while adding Daisy/White to the right, so he could know who had what card.
Daisy nimbly caught the dice when Bookworm tossed them to her, and rolled. A five and four, more than enough to enter the Ballroom, which she did enter. "I say it happened in the ballroom, by Mr. Green, with the rope." Daisy moved the rope and Mr. Green pieced into the ballroom. Whoops. Bookworm forgot to do that his turn, but he guessed the royalties let it slide. Since Bookworm was in possession of all three of said cards, Peach naturally did not have any. Bookworm decided to show her the ballroom card, making sure Peach couldn't see, of course.
Peach grabbed the dice and rolled. Two fours, which would've been close enough for her to enter the conservatory, but she didn't, instead moving her pawn to a space two spaces left from the entrance to the room.
It was Bookworm's turn again. He took the "secret passage" from the lounge to the conservatory, bringing his pawn from the most southwestern part of the board to the most northeastern part of it. He decided to change only one variable that was in his control. "I suggest the murder took place in the conservatory, by Miss Scarlet, with the candlestick." He turned to Daisy. She had the candlestick card. Seemed like she had a lot of weapons... Hm... It was her turn now. Rolled the dice. Nine. Enough to move her pawn from the ballroom to the billiard room. "I say it happened in the billiard room, by... Mrs. Peacock, with the rope." Peach had shown Daisy a card. Well, Bookworm had the billiard room and rope cards, so... Peach must've shown her the Mrs. Peacock card! he realized. Marking it off, he added Peacock/Peach.
It was Peach's turn. "Oh, I see how it is, Daisy. Since I was moved to the billiard room, I've decided to make a suggestion," Peach claimed firmly. " I think it happened in the billiard room, by Mrs. White, with the knife! How do you like that?" she said, staring at Daisy.
"Ahem..." Bookworm coughed, and Peach quickly darted her eyes and marked off the billiard room. It was Bookworm's turn again. He checked his notepad...
Suspects
Colonel Mustard [ ]
Professor Plum [ ]
Mr. Green [X] I/h
Mrs. Peacock. [X] Peacock/Peach
Miss Scarlet [ ]
Mrs. White[ ]
Weapons
Knife [X] I/h
Candlestick [X] White/Daisy
Revolver [X]White/Daisy
Rope [X] I/h
Lead Pipe [ ]
Wrench [ ]
Rooms
Hall [ ]
Lounge [ ]
Dining Room [ ]
Kitchen [ ]
Ballroom [X] I/h
Conservatory [ ]
Billiard Room [X] I/h
Library [X] I/h
Study [ ]
Okay... so far so good.
He decided to go back to the Lounge from the Conservatory. "I think it happened in the Lounge, by Miss Scarlet, with the Wrench. Nobody has Miss Scarlet... he observed. He turned to Daisy. Wrench card. Which meant...
Weapons
Knife [X] I/h
Candlestick [X] White/Daisy
Revolver [X]White/Daisy
Rope [X] I/h
Lead Pipe [V]
Wrench [X] White/Daisy
...He knew what the weapon was. Maybe this game wasn't as hard as he thought. He gave the dice to Daisy. Four and two. That was enough for her to enter the library from one of the side doors. "I say the murder happened in the library, by Mr. Green, with the... knife," she finished. Bookworm had all three cards. He showed the library card. It was Peach's turn again.
"'I say the murder happened in the library, by Mr. Green, with theeeeeeee . . . KNIFE!'" Peach mocked.
"Stop mimicking me!" Daisy snapped.
"'Stop mimicking me!'" Peach imitated in a voice Daisy didn't have again. However, she did roll. Six and two. Enough to go the the library to further harass Daisy. "I say the murder happened in the library, by Mr. Green, with theeeeeeee . . . KNIFE!" Peach gasped out. Bookworm did his best to stifle a chuckle and showed Peach the library card. She gave him the dice, but she didn't need to bother. Bookworm had decided to go back and forth between the lounge and observatory until they had been proven to be uninvolved with the murder. Now, he was heading back to the Conservatory. Suggestion time. Conservatory. Scarlet. Lead pipe.
Daisy gave him a peak of the Conservatory card. He had to check his notepad again...
Suspects
Colonel Mustard [ ]
Professor Plum [ ]
Mr. Green [X] I/h
Mrs. Peacock. [X] Peacock/Peach
Miss Scarlet [ ]
Mrs. White[ ]
Weapons
Knife [X] I/h
Candlestick [X] White/Daisy
Revolver [X]White/Daisy
Rope [X] I/h
Lead Pipe [V]
Wrench [X] White/Daisy
Rooms
Hall [ ]
Lounge [ ]
Dining Room [ ]
Kitchen [ ]
Ballroom [X] I/h
Conservatory [X] White/Daisy
Billiard Room [X] I/h
Library [X] I/h
Study [ ]
...Now he was getting somewhere! He didn't know exactly how close his opponents were to solving the case, but at least it wasn't going to be total obliteration. He gave the dice to Daisy. Three. She exited the Library and stopped next to the billiard room. Peach grabbed the dice and rolled. Three and two. She moved out from the entrance of the library, left, and up, putting her Mrs. Peacock pawn right next to the cellar. It was Bookworm's turn again. He went from the Conservatory to the Lounge. Yet, again.
"I suggest the crime was committed in the Lounge, by Miss Scarlet, with the lead pipe." Daisy didn't have a card to show. Peach gave him a glimpse of the lounge card.
It was Daisy's turn. She rolled a five and six. One step and she was back in the billiard room. "I say it happened in the Billiard room, by... Professor Plum, with the, uh... rope." Peach turned to Daisy to show her a card. I have the rope and billiard room... So she must have Professor Plum," thought Bookworm, and marked off Professor Plum, adding Peacock/Peach. He was getting a minor headache, so he checked his notepad again.
Suspects
Colonel Mustard [ ]
Professor Plum [X] Peacock/Peach
Mr. Green [X] I/h
Mrs. Peacock. [X] Peacock/Peach
Miss Scarlet [ ]
Mrs. White[ ]
Weapons
Knife [X] I/h
Candlestick [X] White/Daisy
Revolver [X]White/Daisy
Rope [X] I/h
Lead Pipe [V]
Wrench [X] White/Daisy
Rooms
Hall [ ]
Lounge [x] Peacock/Peach.
Dining Room [ ]
Kitchen [ ]
Ballroom [X] I/h
Conservatory [X] White/Daisy
Billiard Room [X] I/h
Library [X] I/h
Study [ ]
Peach's turn. She rolled a four and three. Just enough to make her way to the Ballroom. "I think it happened in the ballroom, by Colonel Mustard, with the wrench. Bookworm only had one card to show. The ballroom. It was his turn again. Now that the conservatory and now the lounge had been taken care of, it was finally time to roll. Three and six. Off to the hall went Miss Scarlet's figurine. They may pick up on the lead pipe on the weapon if I keep guessing it and Miss Scarlet, thought Bookworm. "I suggest the crime was committed in the hall, by Miss Scarlet, with the... Rope," he stated. There. It would throw them off and help him narrow down his choices. "Daisy, do you have a card for me?"
"Nope," she said.
"Peach?" he inquired.
"...No."
"Okay, then..." he trailed off, deep in thought. I guessed the rope, and I have it, but I already know it was the lead pipe. The two I didn't have, weren't in Daisy's or Peach's hands. So... he marked off his notepad, satisfied.
Suspects
Colonel Mustard [X]
Professor Plum [X] Peacock/Peach
Mr. Green [X] I/h
Mrs. Peacock. [X] Peacock/Peach
Miss Scarlet [V]
Mrs. White[X]
Weapons
Knife [X] I/h
Candlestick [X] White/Daisy
Revolver [X]White/Daisy
Rope [X] I/h
Lead Pipe [V]
Wrench [X] White/Daisy
Rooms
Hall [V]
Lounge [x] Peacock/Peach.
Dining Room [X]
Kitchen [X]
Ballroom [X] I/h
Conservatory [X] White/Daisy
Billiard Room [X] I/h
Library [X] I/h
Study [X]
"I'm ready to make an accusation!" he exclaimed.
"What?" Peach and Daisy asked in unison.
"I said I was ready to make an accusation...?" he mumbled.
"Okay, then, tell us your guess," Daisy smirked.
"Alright. It was Miss Scarlet, in the hall, with the lead pipe."
"Mmm... Now, away from us, open the cards," Peach instructed.
Bookworm nodded, and carefully grabbed the special envelope in the center of the board. Turning away from the princess, he opened it. The cards revealed... Miss Scarlet, with the lead pipe... Come on, please be right! he wished. He took in a deep breath as the final card was revealed to him.
It was the hall.
"I won!" he announced louder than he probably should have.
"No way!" Daisy said
"Show us the cards!" Peach demanded.
As the cards were revealed to them, they gasped, and then collapsed, moaning like whales.
After their fit of losing, Daisy had an idea. "Hey... he won because of a lucky guess, I bet it wouldn't happen again..." she claimed. Peach and Daisy turned their heads to Bookworm, and raised their eyebrows. "Best two out of three?" Peach asked.
"You're on," Bookworm smirked.
And with that, my tribute to the Clue board games draws to a close. I hope you enjoyed reading this story, and if you haven't, go buy Clue. Seriously, it's a ton of fun, and they just re-released the 1949 edition in 2010, so you can find it for a fairly cheap price. If you don't you're missing out!
Sincerily,
Bookwormvideogamer