A/N Posted originally in Spacebattles.
He had spent a day on the body of Tommen Ba- *cough* Waters *cough* -retheon and he was already sick of it. He had a love and hate relationship with his mother aka Cersei Lannister. The part that Tommen used to know loved her but never really understood her faults but now he understood her faults and more. The more surprising thing really is her being the book version and not Lena Headey.
That was a major problem. And the problem was because from his memories Tyrion Lannister looked like Peter Dinklage although he had the book mismatched eyes and was more like the show version being more kind and all that. The Old Lion was Charles Dance who was also with green eyes and thank the gods that, as Tywin with whiskers would get some time being used to. Oh, and Joffrey looked like the weasel version of the show with the green eyes and not the dashing prince he was on the book.
Well, he himself was a mix of both, for example I was of the age of three and ten. No, that sounds stupid(Damn you, Tommen side!). Tommen was thirteen but didn't look at all like the show version of Tommen Baratheon. The most noticeable thing was the baby fat on his face which was still noticeable and also I had long blonde hair and green eyes. I looked like an older book version of Tommen.
Yesterday was the day before the Purple Wedding which would definitely happen because FUCK JOFFREY! That was something that his past life and his life now agreed on although him being king, neither side were too happy about that. Too much responsibilities and all that. But still better him than Joffrey, right? Right?
Tommen heard some knocking at the door and he bid them in and then came his servants or should he say Cer-his mother's servants. They were definitely on her payroll and were probabl-no, definitely spying Tommen. But for now it was on his benefit to have them.
He changed into his golden doublet and headed to the Queen's Ballroom and started to break his fast… no, he started to eat breakfast. Yes, that sounded better. He observed his uncle and his lady wife who looked nothing like Sophie Turner and looked everything like her book version. She seemed very sullen. Of course, she's sullen you idiot. Her mother and brother got brutally murdered on a wedding. His uncle noticed he was looking at him and stared a bit but Tommen smiled which made his uncle smile in return.
Then his mother presented Joffrey and Margaery the cloak that Joffrey would drape on Margaery. And eventually me. "It is the cloak I donned when Robert took me for his queen, the same cloak my mother Lady Joanna wore when wed to my lord father."
Then they were given gifts as per the Reach's customs. From Jalabhar Xho, Joffrey received a great bow of golden wood and quiver of long arrows fletched with green and scarlet feathers; from Lady Tanda a pair of supple riding boots; from Ser Kevan a magnificent red leather jousting saddle; a red gold brooch wrought in the shape of a scorpion from the Dornishman, Prince Oberyn; silver spurs from Ser Addam Marbrand; a red silk tourney pavilion from Lord Mathis Rowan. Lord Paxter Redwyne brought forth a beautiful wooden model of the war galley of two hundred oars being built even now on the Arbor. "If it please Your Grace, she will be called King Joffrey's Valor," he said, and Joffrey looked at it and announced. "I will make it my flagship when I sail to Dragonstone to kill my traitor uncle Stannis," he said. Tommen held back a chuckle knowing his brother's future.
Then his uncle presented Joffrey with an old book and Tommen knew immediately which one it was. The Live of Four Kings. It was an illustrated book so that made it even better. Joffrey just leafed through the pages. "And what is this, Uncle?"
"Grand Maester Kaeth's history of the reigns of Daeron the Young Dragon, Baelor the Blessed, Aegon the Unworthy, and Daeron the Good," his uncle answered.
"A book every king should read, Your Grace," said Ser Kevan which looked like his show version of him.
"My father had no time for books." Joffrey shoved the tome across the table to land near me. "If you read less, Uncle Imp, perhaps Lady Sansa would have a baby in her belly by now." Joffrey laughed and everyone else laughed beside Tommen and the offended.
"Mayhaps, brother, I will find time for it." Tommen interrupted knowing what would become of the book if he didn't. "There are only four copies of it." This surprised a great deal of people especially his uncle who looked equally surprised and grateful.
"Do as you wish, brother." Joffrey disregarded Tommen and the book very quickly.
Lord Mace Tyrell came forward to present his gift: a golden chalice three feet tall, with two ornate curved handles and seven faces glittering with gemstones. "Seven faces for Your Grace's seven kingdoms," the oaf explained. He showed them how each face bore the sigil of one of the great houses: ruby lion, emerald rose, onyx stag, silver trout, blue jade falcon, opal sun, and pearl direwolf.
"A splendid cup," said Joffrey, "but we'll need to chip the wolf off and put a squid in its place, I think."
"Margaery and I shall drink deep at the feast, good father." Joffrey lifted the chalice above his head, for everyone to admire.
His grandfather waited until last to present the king with his own gift: Widow's Wail. Looked certainly more impressive than the show version. Its scabbard was made of cherrywood, gold, and oiled red leather, studded with golden lions' heads. The lions had ruby eyes, she saw. The ballroom fell silent as Joffrey unsheathed the blade and thrust the sword above his head. Red and black ripples in the steel shimmered in the morning light.
"Magnificent," declared Mathis Rowan.
"A sword to sing of, sire," said Lord Redwyne.
"A king's sword," said Ser Kevan Lannister.
King Joffrey looked as if he wanted to kill someone right then and there, he was so excited. He slashed at the air and laughed. "A great sword must have a great name, my lords! What shall I call it?"
"Widow's Wail." Tommen said immediately so he could get this over this quickly but that earned a few raised eyebrows particularly by his mother and uncle.
"Thank you, brother! And yes! It shall make many a widow, too!" He slashed again. "And when I face my uncle Stannis it will break his magic sword clean in two." Joff tried a downcut, forcing Ser Balon Swann to take a hasty step backward. Laughter rang through the hall at the look on Ser Balon's face.
"Have a care, Your Grace," Ser Addam Marbrand warned the king. "Valyrian steel is perilously sharp."
It was time to leave for the wedding and he had to share the litter with his mother. The litter was something he surprisingly didn't bother him that much probably old Tommen getting used to it.
His ponderings were interrupted by his mother, "What was that before?"
"What?"
"Don't play coy with me, Tommen." Mother scolded him but he frankly didn't care that much.
"What he wasn't going to read the book so I might as well read it myself. As I said they were only four copies and thank the gods the book wasn't near him or there would be only three left." His mother stared at him hard with her green eyes almost like she was regarding him on another level.
"And the sword?"
"Wanted to get it over quickly. Just chose the cruelest name that came to mind." Tommen explained and Cersei looked a bit taken back by Tommen's logic and also sad because of his logic.
The ride was as quiet for the rest of the way but Cers-his mother didn't stop observing him for some reason that Tommen couldn't possibly think until he realised something. Meek Tommen changed in a single tonight to… well him.
Joffrey was adorning a new crown as he recalled from his memories, a glory of crystal and spun gold. It still wouldn't do. Joffrey and Margaery who looked like Natalie Dormer but with brown eyes and as they stood side by side they made a pretty noble couple.
The seven vows were made, the seven blessings invoked, and the seven promises exchanged. When the wedding song had been sung and the challenge had gone unanswered, it was time for the exchange of cloaks.
He let out a yawn as he watched them and he looked down below to see the rather scornful gaze of his mother and his uncle's amused face. Mace Tyrell removed his daughter's maiden cloak tenderly, while Joffrey accepted the folded bride's cloak from him and placed it on Margaery.
"With this kiss I pledge my love!" Joffrey declared in ringing tones. When Margaery echoed the words he pulled her close and kissed her long and deep. Rainbow lights danced once more about the High Septon's crown as he solemnly declared Joffrey of the Houses Baratheon and Lannister and Margaery of House Tyrell to be one flesh, one heart, one soul. If that was true then Margaery would have died along with him… or should I say should die along with him.
Why couldn't Joffrey die earlier? He just wanted to sleep or do something entertaining.
Ser Loras and Ser Meryn led the procession from the sept in their white scale armor and snowy cloaks.. After the royal couple followed Queen Cersei and Lord Tyrell, then the bride's mother arm-in-arm with Lord Tywin. After them it was him and after him the Queen of Thorns tottered after them with one hand on Ser Kevan Lannister's arm and the other on her cane, her twin guardsmen close behind her in case she fell. Next came Ser Garlan Tyrell and his lady wife, and after them his uncle and his lady wife Sansa.
The cheering outside was annoying and the propaganda disgusting. It's like they forgot they tried to kill Joffrey and he didn't buy Margaery's act at all although there could be some truth in there but for now he was going to think the worst of everyone except of course the only person he could trust. Tyrion Lannister.
Joffrey and Margaery stood surrounded by Kingsguard atop the steps that fronted on the broad marble plaza. Ser Addam and his gold cloaks held back the crowd, while the statue of King Baelor the Blessed gazed down on them benevolently. Tommen had to offer his congratulations although rather lazily. He kissed Margaery's fingers and wished her every happiness.
He then went to join his mother on their litter. Thankfully, he could stand the heat but he doubted Tommen could have before. His thoughts went on how he had to approach the aftermath of Joffrey's poisoning for he had already planned to lay the seeds during Joffrey's death. He winced as he remembered the crying Cersei as she held her dead son in her arms and he almost wanted to tell her right there and then that Joffrey was going to be poisoned but the hatred of Joffrey and fate of the realm outweighed his mother's happiness by quite a bit.
"You seem quite taken by the Stark girl today." His mother commented as she observed his reaction with her green orbs but he kept his composure but he still almost started laughing out loud.
"Yes, you could say so." His mother raised an eyebrow at that. "I was taken by her strength. To endure all that loss it must take quite a bit of willpower to not throw yourself from your window."
His mother just stared at him completely taken back by his answer and she went silent for a moment before nodding slowly.
They then returned to their own chambers and he changed to a gold and black doublet to represent the Baratheon colors who he shared no blood with.
But now it was time for the real wedding to start. As in Dothraki culture a wedding without a death will be seen as dull affair.