Disclaimer, yo: Haha. You're funny.
This is part three of a one/twoshot trilogy. The first one is One Hour and the second one is Complicated. You should probably read those two first unless you want to be very confused. Okay you won't be that confused, but...oh nevermind. And now I hereby present you with.............................................................................................
What Do You Say We Leave For California?
Meteorology: the earth science dealing with phenomena of the atmosphere.
Meteorologist: a person who studies meteorology; a weather forecaster.
Weather: the state of the atmosphere with respect to wind, temperature, cloudiness, moisture, pressure, etc.
No matter how you say it, they all relate to the same thing. Meteorologists study the condition of the atmosphere to predict the weather, which is what meteorology is. And I hate it. I hate that stupid study and the stupid earth and the stupid weather and the stupid state of New Mexico and how it's always stupidly bright and sunny like nothing could ever go wrong.
It's all so...so...so freaking stupid if you ask me!
Usually, I enjoy the sun and I appreciate how my home town and state is always so warm and welcoming to visitors. I usually love how I can most of the time wake up and walk over to my sliding glass doors and pull open the drapes where Mr. Sun will greet me. Even at the day's most early hours. I usually love to spend my time outside tanning by the pool, letting the hot yellow ball of gas beat down on my flawless skin. And there's usually nothing I adore more than taking my little dog Boi on walks all over the neighborhood and too the park.
Usually.
But today is a different story. Today, the stupid blazing hot nearing-the-end-of-summer sun is the second thing in the world I hate the most today. I can't even begin to explain how badly I wish it would rain and pour and maybe that Albuquerque would even get a few thunder rolls or lightening claps. That would be perfect to fit the mood that I'm in. Right now, I hate how the stupid sun is glowing up in the stupid clear blue beautiful sky. I hate how it seems like the gorgeous day today is probably making everyone else happy, and putting me through even worse hell because of how badly I wish everyone else would suffer with me.
It's just not fair. Nothing is fair anymore. My summer had started out so great...so amazing. I'd spent the first couple of weeks just hanging out with all my friends and my boyfriend, and then had spent two weeks in Hawaii- the place I love most, on the island of Maui, with my family. The rest of the summer after that seemed to go by so quickly, because that's when the last minute preparations for college came in to play, and all of us were freaking out. I hardly even got to enjoy the last half of it. And today...today is the worst day of all, because in less than 24 hours the love of my life is leaving me. Hopefully not forever, but for a long time I know. I knew ever since prom of senior year that this day would come. I knew it would hurt, I just didn't think this much, and I certainly hadn't expected the hurt to start so early. I thought the pain would kick in maybe a few hours before he left me for stupid California for a whole semester. (The first thing I hate right now.) But not the day before. The glorious day before that I so desperately wished would be gloomy and dark and grey and rainy and awful to suit my mood just right and bring everyone else down with me.
Why should the day be beautiful? Why should everyone else in this stupid hot state get to enjoy it while I'm suffering? Why why why? My life as of now, is just full of questions and no answers. Like why do couples always have to get seperated for college? Why do summer flings never seem to last? Is my relationship going to last? We promised each other we would try, but who really knows for sure? And of course, there was the most important question of all:
Why was he leaving for some other college other then the U of A?
It just didn't make sense, and no matter how many times he'd tried to explain it to me- explain that freakin' Berkley was right for him, I couldn't and wouldn't bring myself to listen to his excuses. I don't want to know how amazing of a school the University of California apparently was. I don't care. All I care about is the fact that he is leaving and there's no way around it. He's already got his things packed up in his truck and he's all ready to go on his long road trip at noon tomorrow. I should know, I was there when he was packing up luggage two days ago.
-Flashback-
"I really don't understand how you're planning to successfully make it all the way to California in this pile of junk." I said to Troy, watching helplessly as he tossed a navy blue suitcase into the back of his car. He turned to me with a small smile.
"It'll be fine, my dad had it fixed up and ready to go last week 'cause he knew I'd be leaving today."
"You know, if you would just take a plane there that would give you a whole other day to spend here with me." I said, not bothering to hide the hurt in my voice. "Me, you know- you're GIRLFRIEND."
I know he hates it when I pull the pitiful girlfriend card on him, like I have seemed to be doing a lot of lately. But just because he hates it doesn't mean I'm about to stop. I don't care that I think he deserves to feel guilty for choosing to do things the hard way because really, wouldn't it make more sense for him to just grab a plane ticket and go there a day later then he would if he took his truck, if he really must go at all? It's not fair. NONE of this is far!
He looked at me for a moment, a cross expression on his face, before pulling me into a hug. I kept my arms folded across each other, not returning the hug and not willing to forgive him for doing this to me. For putting me through this. For loading up his truck to LEAVE ME when I'm standing RIGHT BEHIND HIM as he does so when what we are really supposed to be doing right now is cuddling in his room.
"Hug me back," he says, and I shake my head stubbornly against his warm, broad chest, knowing that if I give into doing what his wants, I'll turn even more pathetic and start bawling at any second. But I have to keep some of my dignity, right?
"Hug me back," his voice is a little more stern now as his grip around me tightens, and I'm just about to give in but I fight it with a determined;
"No."
"Sharpay," he says, his tone so serious and calm that it almost scares me because now I'm almost positive he's going to win this battle, but I still try to ignore him anyways.
"Hug me back."
He may as well have just said "alaKAZAM!" instead because it really did seem like with those three repeated words he cast a spell on me because that's when I finally surrender and loosen my arms from their crossed position and I let them circle around him finally as well.
"Baby, I love you so much!" I exclaim then, forgetting about trying to keep my last bit of dignity as the pitiful words start to flow from my mouth.
"How can you leave me? How?" I ask him, almost sounding demanding while pressing my face hard against his chest as I cling to him desperately aching for him to stay. I know I'm being pathetic and acting ridiculous for trying to make him feel guilty or something but once again I don't care. All I want is for him to stay because what I said is nothing but completely true- I love him so much. So much that it hurts. And I can't bear this- I can't bear watching him loading up his truck so casually as he readies himself to leave Albuquerque for good in just a few days. And the fact of knowing that there is absolutely nothing I can do about it, just hurts even more.
"I love you too, babe. More than anything." Troy tells me in such a sincere and gentle tone that just makes me want to give into my horribly strong urge to bust out in tears even more. But I don't, I force my eyes to remain dry.
"And I'm not leaving yet. I'm not leaving for four more days. We still have time, it's okay."
"Time to what? Time for me to wish would never end because even right now as the seconds tick on, all we're doing is just nearing even closer to the moment you're gone?" I choke out, my voice breaking. A sign I'm about to break down and let the on-coming tears take control over me. But I still don't surrender to my painfully stinging eyeballs. I refuse to cry. I refuse it.
"What? No, I mean... time to just....spend together." He's still holding me ever so closely as he says this. His grip on me hasn't faltered one bit.
"Well excuse me, but having to stand here like a helpless idiot as I watch you pile suitcase after suitcase into your car isn't exactly what I'd like to spend time doing!" I tell him in frustration, my voice muffled by his t-shirt. "I don't want you to go."
He's silent for a while after that. We both are as we just stand there, leaning against his truck, hugging, until finally he's able to mumble two short words.
"I'm sorry."
Before I can yell at him that that's the stupidest thing he could come up with and that I'm disgusted, he places his finger under my chin and tilts my head up so I have no choice but to look directly at him. And before I can yank myself away from him in even more anger and frustration, he captures me in a kiss so loving I can feel the butterflies playing Ring-A-Round-the-Rosy in my stomach. I kiss him back because his stupid lips have reeled me in and I'm not even able to pull away. Like, my body- my mind- my soul, won't allow it. Not only that, but I almost instantly find myself deepening the kiss more and more, hoping that the harder I kiss him, the more pain will ease.
-End of Flashback-
The pain didn't ease. It didn't fucking ease at all. If anything, even more pain was added from his exotic kiss because it just made me think that in only a matter of days, and now hours, he won't be able to do that with me for a very long time. And now I'm sitting on the white loveseat in my room, staring blankly out the window at the stupid beautiful day outside, waiting for him to return with the stupid Pepsi's he went downstairs to get us.
Troy came back up and sat next to me a little while later, handing me the ice cold drink.
"Thanks," I mumbled, taking it and taking a small sip before setting it down on the mini coffee table in front of the couch we were on. My room has a pretty nice setup.
"So," he said after taking a couple drinks of his soda. "What do you wanna do today?"
I just sat there after he asked his question, continuing to sit still, facing and staring out the window. I had to think for a while, heartbroken, totally unsure of what to say. I mean, just ask yourself: what would you do if in less than 24 hours, you were going to be separated from the jerk that later became your boyfriend? We had such a short amount of time left together, and it pretty much sucked that I couldn't think of anything to do. I knew we had to make our time worthwhile, but I was too depressed to think about possible things to spend our time doing that could be "fun." I just couldn't do it. I shrugged, still not looking at him.
"I don't know."
"Well it's pretty hot out," Troy said, "wanna go swimming?"
"Not really." I told him, not in the mood for swimming.
"Okay...how about we take Boi on a walk?" He suggested then. I glanced over at my bed were my little yorkie was sleeping peacefully before turning back to the window.
"He's asleep." I told Troy, meaning "no."
"Uh...let's go get some ice cream then. I heard they just opened up a new ice cream place downtown," he suggested thoughtfully.
"I don't really feel like eating anything." I said with a shrug.
"Well, I'm fresh out of ideas then, Shar. Come on, there's gotta be something you want!" Troy said, throwing his arms up in the air, giving up on trying to get me to go along with one of his ideas. I finally turned to him then, staring emotionless at his face.
"You wanna know what I want?" I asked him, and he looked back at me.
"Yes I do."
"I want you to stay." I said for about the fifty millionth time in the last week or so. He ran a shaky hand through his hair.
"I'm sorry, Shar," he said apologetically, now staring down at my couch rather than me. "I just...I can't."
"And why the hell not!?" I demanded to know, feeling as though I could punch someone at any second. What the fuck was so freaking great about Berkley anyway? And why couldn't he wait another day? Why did he have to leave tomorrow? He was the very first one out of our group to leave. Even Gabriella, who was going to Stanford, which I heard was just like half an hour away from Berkley, wasn't going to be leaving for a few more days. Why did Troy have to go so early before everyone else? Ryan was going to head off to Julliard in a week, and Tay was taking off for Yale a couple days after him, leaving me and Chad here at the stupid U of A all alone. Life basically sucked ass.
"Look...I couldn't back out of Berkley even if I wanted." Troy said to me, "it's too late now. The semester starts next week. Summer is ending, I've gotta do this."
"No, you don't." I said, reaching for his hand. "The college here offered you a scholarship earlier in the year, did they not? You could still go here if you want to."
He didn't respond to that, he just looked down at our interlaced fingers without a word. A few seconds went by before I quietly asked,
"Why don't you want to?"
He still didn't say anything.
"It just doesn't make sense!" I exclaimed, "you're not making any sense! You have the perfect opportunity to stay here and go to school with your best friend and your girlfriend. Why don't you want to, Troy? Why would you rather go to some college over a thousand miles away, where you're not even gonna know anyone at first? Why are you doing this? Even your dad wants you to go to-"
"Sharpay, just stop. Okay?" Troy finally spoke up, cutting me off. "Why can't you just go along with what I want? It's already gonna be hard enough as it is saying goodbye to everyone. Especially you. So it doesn't help that all you've been doing this whole summer is nagging me about it."
"If it's gonna be hard," I asked, "why go? What is the point? What's so great about stupid college in stupid California? What is so wrong with staying here, in New Mex-"
"I didn't get in!" Troy blurted out, immediately shutting me up. I stared at him in shock, waiting for him to continue. He still wouldn't look me in the eye.
"Everyone thought it would be so easy for me to get into the U of A," he told me and shook his head in disgust with a scoff. "Even I thought so. But it wasn't. But because I thought it was so easy, I guess I slacked off on my application to them, thinking it would be no problem to get in. But they rejected me. They fucking rejected me! But just because that bitch ass school didn't want me, I'm not about to throw my life away at community college! And it was either that or Berkley."
He turned to me and looked at me then, taking both of my hands in his. "I loveyou, Sharpay, I really do." He said and then sighed, "...but I need to do this. I need to focus more on my future right now, so I'm going to California. I'm going to Berkley, and maybe driving there alone instead of taking a plane will help me clear my head more. Because I'm still worried how everything is going to play out." He paused.
"I'm scared as hell."
I just stared at him for a while, a million thoughts running through my head at once. He didn't get into the U of A? All of us had been assuming all along that he had and was just choosing Berkley over it. I, for one, had never stopped to think for a second that he didn't even get into it, and that that was the reason he was taking off for the University of Cali. I'm still heartbroken as ever that he's leaving, but maybe had he told me that little fact sooner it wouldn't of been hurting this much all along. Maybe I would've- no, I know I would've understood his decision a lot better if he would've told me a long time ago.
And what did the last part of his little speech mean? I need to focus more on my future right now? What the hell was that supposed to mean? Was he...god, it even stung like a billion bee stings to even think it...but was he...was he saying it was over? Was he saying we were over?
"Are you...breaking up with me?" I asked him, tears springing into my eyes. I couldn't imagine him dumping me. Especially when he'd been saying to me all summer- ever since the prom, that we were going to make this work no matter what. Was he going back on all of that now? Had all of it been just a bunch of BS? He had been lying to me all along about not getting into the university here?...or maybe I'd just been assuming this whole time without him really even needing to say anything about it. But still. Had our whole relationship been a lie?
How I even managed to ask him if he was breaking up with me, I didn't know. I couldn't even believe I'd managed to utter those few words. And I don't know what I would do if his answer was "yes."
But he just looked at me, watching as I fought the tears once again like two days ago when we were standing beside his truck.
"Hey," he said softly after a while as I felt a little tear trickle down my cheek. "None of that, baby. Come on."
He let go of one of my hands and gently wiped away the tear that had slid down my face. "Don't cry, please? I'm not breaking up with you, that's not what I meant. I'm sorry for making you think that."
Words could not even begin to explain the not even wave, but tsunami of relief that washed over me the moment he said that. So I'll just leave it at that. I leaned towards him, nuzzling my face into the crook where his neck and shoulder met. I felt his strong arms go around me instantly.
"Don't scare me like that!" I scolded him. How dare he make me think even for a second we were over. "And why didn't you ever tell me before that you didn't get into the U of A? How come you let me go all summer thinking you wanted to go to California to purposely...I don't even know what! Leave me on purpose or something?"
"I didn't mean to," Troy said, rubbing small circles on my back. I wanted to melt at his touch. "It was just...embarrassing, you know? Everyone, I mean, everyone assumed I would get in or got in. But I didn't, and it's embarrassing to even think about."
"You didn't even think you could trust me? Me, of all people?" I asked him, still in shock of that. Again, he didn't say anything at first. So I waited, not saying anything more either, thinking he was probably just trying to come up with some long, apologetic explanation about how stupid he was for not telling me much sooner. But after a while, the only thing I got was another;
"I'm sorry."
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I'm not sure at what point I dozed off. All I know is that I woke up in confusion and found Sharpay sleeping nice and sound on top of me. It took me a moment to realize where I was and why I was here in the first place before I finally came to the conclusion that we were laying down on her bedroom couch and the last thing I remembered happening beforehand was me holding her tightly against me. And now, well...here we are!
I sat up carefully with her still on top of me and glanced over at her bedside table at the clock, trying my best not to wake her from her slumber. She stirred a little against me but still remained asleep. The time told 9:04. So it wasn't really late or anything, but still. I knew I should probably get going. We had to of been knocked out like this for at five hours or so. I looked out the window. The last time I did so it was still bright and sunny out and now it was pretty dark. I ran a hand quickly through my already messy hair before picking my petite girlfriend up carefully in my arms bridal style and stood up off the couch, carrying her over to her fairly large sized bed instead. Boi was nowhere in sight. He must've ran off a while ago.
Sharpay moved once again just a tiny bit as I set her down on the comfortable bed that I'd laid in plenty of times myself to watch a movie with or make out with her or other things of that sort. I looked down at her sleeping form for a minute before taking the blanket that sat folded at the foot of her bed and placing it on top of her. She looked so at peace with herself and the world when she slept. She really was a sleeping beauty. After a few more seconds of watching her sleep, I leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her soft pink lips.
"See you tomorrow," I whispered to her before turning and walking out of the room- the room I knew I wasn't going to be in for a while since I was heading off to school tomorrow. I figured I'd be seeing her then, along with all my friends and of course my parents. All of them would be there to tell me goodbye one last time. I didn't like having to leave them and the place where I'd been living since second grade so soon. But I had to, I just had t
As I hopped into my car, which was already loaded up in the back with most of my belongings, and pulled out of the Evans family driveway...maybe I should've stopped the consider at least for a moment that someone was not going to show up to say goodbye to me tomorrow.
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I really don't know what it is with me and these strange dreams I tend to have about Troy. But last night, I dreamt that it was today...the day he was going to bail on all of us for California. It wasn't just the day itself, either, it was the actual moment that he was leaving. Everything that I imagine what's going to happen in real life occurred just the way I thought it would in my dream for the most part- his parents crying both proud tears of joy and sad tears at the thought of him leaving as they squeezed him to death in his driveway. Then he went over to hug Tay, then Gabi, then a bawing, blubbering Chad. All so normal, right?
But what made this dream so weird was the part when he got to hugging Ryan and I didn't seem to be anywhere in sight. I expected myself to be standing next to my brother to be the very last one to share a painful goodbye with Troy Bolton. But I wasn't. I mean, I was certainly there alright, but it was like I was an outsider- standing far along the street, doing nothing but observing the sad parting scene. Like a viewer watching a movie on DVD. I was there to witness it, but I was outside the picture...I wasn't actually therewith everyone like I know I should've been.
But all that was crazy. It was insane, it would be totally wrong and unrealistic for me to not be there to tell my boyfriend goodbye and kiss him one last time.
I got up off my bed and walked over to the sliding glass doors, pulling them open and staring blankly outside at the once again stupid beautiful morning sunshiney day, as if asking God for a sign. How did I even end up in my bed? The last thing I remember was leaning against Troy...yesterday. He must've tucked me in and then left....left, just like he was going to be doing today.
Today
Today
Today
It just wasn't right. This wasn't right, it just seemed way too soon and random and just out of place to be saying goodbye to him already. It was way too soon. I felt as though part of me was empty. A very large part. There was like this huge hole inside my body that needed to be filled. I sighed and pressed my forehead against the glass. Not only did I not want him to leave already, but it just really seemed like he wasn't even supposed to. I can't really explain it, but I really felt as though it wasn't his time yet to go. He needed to stay here with all of us if even for a couple of more days. It didn't seem right that he was leaving already. This day had come so quickly. Way too quickly. There was unfinished business between us, but I couldn't seem to place my finger on what the unfinished business was. I just knew I needed more time to think about it- time that I didn't have. Time that was non existent. I'm not sure of really anything right now. All I know is that I have this feeling in my gut that it would be wrong for Troy to leave today. It's not his time yet, I just know it. And that's the only thing that I'm sure of. But there's really nothing I can do about it.
I stood there for a while, trying to gather my thoughts and attempt to come to some kind of conclusion as I leaned against the glass doors. And then suddenly, I had this other strange feeling wash over me...a string feeling of hope. It was so small, but I could feel it. I could feel the hope bubbling up in m heart and that maybe there was in fact something I could do about this whole situation after all. Maybe I could figure out what the unfinished business was and do something to finish it.
I pulled away from the sliding double doors and raced into my bathroom to take a shower. I wasn't really sure what my exactly motive was after I got ready, but there was one thing I did know for sure:
Troy wasn't supposed to leave. The atmosphere just didn't want it yet. I could feel it. He wasn't supposed to say goodbye just yet. We needed more time. We actually needed it. I wasn't supposed to say goodbye to him yet.
So I wasn't going to.
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The first thing I did when I woke up this morning was call Sharpay. I woke up at about 9:00 to get ready because today's the big day. I still couldn't believe that I was heading off for college in just three hours. It was...unbelievable...incredible. In just a few short days, I would be a formal college guy. It was pretty insane if you ask me- today I'm still a high school graduate but in just a short matter of time, I'll be a college freshman.
Sharpay didn't answer the first time I rang her, so I tried again. And again......and again. I finally gave up after about the sixth time. I didn't even know really why I was calling her- it just seemed like the right thing to do since I'd be separated from her for a long time in just a few hours. Plus I wanted to ask what time she was planning on coming over. I expected her to come over pretty soon with the whole group so we could all spend a little time together before I took off.
Climbing off my sheetless mattress that lay alone on the middle of my floor (since most everything else was all packed up), I decided to go take a shower and that I'd try to call her again after I got ready which would only be about half an hour from now.
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"Hey Ryan, have you seen Sharpay?" I asked eagerly into the phone forty minutes later as I sat in the living room downstairs, absent mindfully flipping through television channels as I waited for my toast to pop up in the toaster in the kitchen.
"Troy?" my friend -slash- the brother of my girlfriend responded in confusion. "No...I haven't," he said, "I thought she was already at your house. I was actually on my way over now myself before you called."
"You mean you haven't seen her all morning?" I asked. He didn't say anything. I took his silence as a no.
"That's impossible...I left her in her room last night asleep."
"Chill, she's probably on her way there."
"Well, when did you get up?" I asked, recalling how Sharpay hadn't been answering her phone all morning. Aside from the six times I'd tried calling her right when I got up, I'd also been trying to reach her for the last ten minutes with no luck. And she always usually answered her phone. Always.
"About an hour ago. I went into her room then to see if she was up already but she wasn't even in there."
"Did you check the bathroom?"
"No...." Ryan admitted slowly. "..but I figured she was in there. You know- getting ready. Like I said, she's probably on her way over now. You know how long she takes to get ready."
"Well I've been trying to call her for the last forty minutes and she hasn't been answering." I told Ryan, "so I'm just kinda confused is all. Is her car not in the driveway?"
"Maybe her phone's just dead or she didn't take it with her." Ryan said, but I could hear the doubt in his voice as he said this. He knew Sharpay probably better than I did, and we both knew that she would never be caught dead without her cell phone.
"But hold on."I heard shuffling as Ryan probably went to go check to see if Sharpay's pink convertible was in the driveway. If it wasn't, then I could at least hope that maybe she really was on her way over. It would be the logical thing to assume, ignoring the whole cell phone thing anyway. But if her car was there, then well, I'd just be even more confused because why would her car be there while she wasn't?
Ryan returned to the line about a minute later.
"Troy?" He sounded a bit hesitant to tell me something. Worried, even.
"Yeah?" I asked cautiously, not having such a good feeling about this.
"Her car's still here."
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"And you checked, you checked her car to see if for some weird reason, she was just sitting in there or sleeping or something?"
Ryan slapped a hand over his face in annoyance as I asked this question for probably about the millionth time since he'd arrived at my house an hour ago. I couldn't help it. I had to get this straight.
"Yes," he sighed dramatically. "I did, Troy."
"And?"
"And?" he asked now, "And? What do you mean and? And she wasn't in there! I already told you that."
"And you tried calling her to?" this is the second most asked question I've been asking him. "She didn't answer?"
"Yes, I did. And no, she didn't. Not the first, second, third, or even fourteenth time I tried calling her."
I plopped down on the couch next to Gabriella who I noticed had been sitting there silently, worriedly watching me pace back in forth nervously in front of everyone. She'd arrived at my house with Ryan, as he'd gone to pick her up before coming over. I dropped my face in my hands before running them several times through my hair, wondering where on earth Sharpay could possibly be. Gabriella placed a comforting hand on my shoulder.
"Relax, Troy," she said. "I've tried calling her too....we all have, and well, maybe she just doesn't have her phone with her this one time. But I'm sure she'll turn up sometime soon."
"Soon enough to say goodbye to me before I leave in," I looked at my watch, doubt filling my voice, "one hour?"
Gabriella just let her hand fall from my shoulder, not saying anything.
"Seriously guys," I said, standing up again to pace back and forth in front of them. That's pretty much all I'd been doing for the last hour and a half since even before anyone got here. I couldn't seem to sit still for long. "Think about it- she's not answering her phone to anyone, her car is still parked in the driveway, no one's seen her or talked to her since yesterday- what if she got abducted in her sleep or something?"
"Abducted? By what?" Chad asked from his position on the recliner across the room. "Aliens? That'd be fuckin' sweet!"
I grabbed a sofa cushion from where I'd been sitting moments earlier and chucked it at his bush of a head. "No, dumbfuck. I'm saying...what if she got kidnapped?" It was terrible to even think about. There was no way Sharpay Evans would ever be able to fight off an angry, perverted kidnapper awake. Much less while she was sleeping.
"She's a light sleeper...I think she'd notice if some sicko was creeping into her room in the middle of the night, and we all know how loud she would scream. One of our parents or I would've heard her." Ryan said, "my room is right next to hers and I didn't go to bed till pretty late- like, four AM. Trust me, she didn't get kidnapped. Plus, we've got gates surrounding our house that would be impossible for anyone to get around."
Remember- Evans family + country club ownership + gates surrounding huge house = rich
"She's not that light of a sleeper, Ryan." I disagreed. "Last night when I carried her over to her bed after we fell asleep on the couch, she barely even stirred. Just a little."
"Okay, but she's not a heavy one either," the fraternal twin corrected himself, "trust me. She didn't get kidnapped. She keeps her windows and doors locked at all times. We all know that."
I glanced around the room from Gabriella, to Taylor, to Chad, who all nodded in agreement with Ryan. Even I couldn't call him out on that. We were all aware that Sharpay always slept with her doors and windows locked ever since she told us a long time ago that it was so she wouldn't get kidnapped in her sleep. That was around the time some news article about a 14 year old girl was murdered in her sleep by some sick intruder into her home, and she become all paranoid about it.
"And when I went in there this morning, none of the windows or the glass doors were broken. Everything was fine and you guys knows how strong our security system is." Ryan told us, not sounding worried that his sister could've been taken in her sleep last night at all. "No one- I'm telling ya, no one could manage to get through any of the locked doors to our house."
I was finally convinced that Sharpay hadn't been kidnapped after a few more minutes of Ryan informing us of his family's strong security system and how impossible it would be for anyone to get around it. It certainly made sense why their family would have all that security after all, Vance Evans wa a pretty well known business man around Albuquerque with probably plenty of wackjobs after him and possibly his family.
But even though we all became positive that nothing terrible had happened to my girlfriend, that still didn't excuse the fact that none of us had been able to reach her today.
Half an hour later, Sharpay still hadn't been heard from by any of us and we'd all still been trying to call her. Ryan had even gone back to their house to see if she'd shown up there but came back with no news of any appearance made by her. (He would've just called and asked their parents but they were working down at the club. In fact, Sharpay and Ryan were supposed to be down at the club with them today too but had insisted on staying to say goodbye to me- which didn't seem like it was going to happen for Sharpay.)
Even my parents were wondering where Sharpay was. My mom trailed in the living room at 11:40 with a freshly baked batch of two dozen chocolate chip cookies for the four of my best friends and I that were all here. All here, without a certain blonde girl that we were all, no doubt, extremely worried about and wondering where the fuck she could be.
"Any luck reaching Sharpay?" she asked as she set the cookies down on the table. I saw Chad eyeing them like a wild hawk out of the corner of my eye where I had once again been sitting down next to Gabriella for about thirty seconds. Had my mom not walked in here with cookies, I probably would've been up pacing again by now.
I didn't even bother to answer her question. No one did. So she could probably get an obvious answer from our silence.
"Well, Troy," my mom said with a sigh, "whether she shows up or not...do you think you're still going to be ready to leave in twenty minutes?"
I scratched the back of my neck nervously. "I don't know." I said. Would I really be able to leave Albuquerque before seeing or even talking to Sharpay again? It didn't seem possible but with the way things were going............I wasn't even sure. Where the hell was she? And why were we just sitting here, waiting around, waiting for her to come back to earth? It didn't feel very productive what we were doing. Which was nothing. It didn't seem right...us just sitting her, snacking on cookies without any knowledge of where Sharpay could be. I had to go. I had to get up. I had to get out and look for her!
"I'm so sorry she hasn't turned up yet," my mom said, "but don't give up hope. You've still got several minutes left. It's okay."
"Thanks, mom." I mumbled flatly. She didn't say anything for a moment, until finally she spoke up what felt like hours later but was probably only mere seconds.
"Well," she said, none of us had made a move for the cookies. "You guys better eat these up quick before Winnie comes in and attacks you for them. She was watching me while I was rolling up the dough and you know how bad chocolate is for dogs." She shook her head, "unfortunately that dog just doesn't seem to get it."
My friends all forced laughs as they reached to take a couple of cookies. But I didn't. I just sat there, thinking of my mom's dumb Pomeranian pooch Winnie that is evil I tell you! She is vicious and we've never really been all that good of friends. She is the reason I've had to use the old "my dog ate my homework" excuse on my teacher's plenty of times in the past. Only for me, it was always the truth. Stupid mutt. I get along with Sharpay's dog better then I do my own...or my moms. At least Boi doesn't growl at me every time I come around.
Wait a minute....Winnie...Boi...dog...Sharpay...Sharpay likes to walk her dog...park!
"She's with Boi at the park!" I exclaimed suddenly, jumping up from the couch. The five people in the room surrounding me all shot me baffled looks, stopping their cookie eating mid-bite.
"Thanks mom!" I said, running by my mother after giving her a kiss on the cheek before running out the door. I couldn't hop in my car and speed off to the park faster than I did. My speed was insane as I drove down to the local park. Of course! How could I not have realized it before? It made too much sense now- why Sharpay had left her car in the driveway. Why she hadn't been answering her phone. She was taking Boi for a walk in the park. She never took her phone with her when she did that because she wanted to be, and I quote her words from before exactly: "at peace with nature. Ringing phones would get in the way of that." And whenever she went to the park with Boi, we all knew how many hours she could spend there. Of course...she usually told someone when she was going for a walk with him. But still. That's where she had to be, right? In all the excitement of realizing where I was pretty sure she was, I didn't even stop to think that it didn't really make much sense for her to be spending all this time at the park on the day that I was leaving for Berkley.
I must've been searching around the perimeter of the park for not even five minutes before I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket. I flipped it out and open without bothering to look first at the caller ID.
"Hello?" I asked impatiently, wanting to get back to my search.
"Troy, when you ran out you said you thought Sharpay was at the park with Boi, right?"
It was Ryan.
"Yeah..." I said, determined. "I know she is. She has to be."
Ryan was silent a moment before responding to me.
"Look man, I'm sorry to tell you, but when I went home a little while ago to see if she was there, Boi came running up to greet me the second I unlocked the door."
My hold on the phone transformed into a clutch and I angrily punched the car horn with my other fist. Sharpay would only ever go to the park with Boi. She had no reason to go just by herself. I was sure of it.
"What!" I exclaimed in the phone, probably loud enough to bust Ryan's eardrum. "So you're saying, she's not here because the damn dog is still at home!?"
I could feel all my hope and sense of being sure drain from my veins faster than the rate at which dry ice transforms into a gas the second it touches the floor...and that's pretty damn quick...and I only know that because Taylor told me sometime last year when she was helping me with my science homework.
"Well......yeah." Ryan said. "Sorry, dude. She's not there."
I sighed, clearly defeated now for sure. "Thanks, Ryan." I said, hanging up the phone. I just sat there in my car for a while, not doing anything. Not driving, not parking, just sitting with the car motor running. It was 11:49 now. I was supposed to be leaving in eleven minutes. When I'd pictured this day, I expected all my friends and parents to be there. And that included my girlfriend. I never once thought that she would, of all people, be the one to not show up.
I drove home with a mixture of emotions running through me- hurt, anger, defeat, helplessness, confusion, worry...all the above.
Where the hell are you, Shar?
-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-
"Oh honey, I miss you so much already!"
"Me too, mom." I said, hugging my mother tightly as she soaked up my shirt with her tears. This was it. The formal goodbye. The moment I've always known was coming. It was here. It was now. And Sharpay was still nowhere to be found. My dad finally managed to get me away from my crying mother after she gave me a long speech about how proud of me she was for getting into such a fine college and to "make good choices" and be extra careful to "stay out of trouble" now that I was on my own.
"Son," my dad said as I faced him. I nodded.
"Dad."
He pulled me into a hug then. "Be good, Troy."
I pulled away from my father a little while later, actually feeling as though I could cry. But maybe that was because of the tears I saw welling up in his. My dad never cries, so it really is a huge deal when he does.
"Make me proud." He said, nodding at me and smiling. I did the same back.
"I will, dad."
With one last nod, he gave me a rub on the shoulder before I moved down the waiting line of people to Taylor, the girl who had been one of my best girl friends just about ever since I moved here. She was the one who, when I was the new kid in the middle of second grade, walked right up to me and said:
"I'm Taylor. Mrs. Webb said I was in charge of cleaning the chalk board and erasers everyday after school. You can help me sometime, if you want."
Of course being in second grade there was just about nothing cooler then being the teacher's helper, so I instantly took her up on that offer. We've been friends ever since.
"Look whose all grown up." My old friend grinned at me. I just smiled and hugged her.
"Good luck at Yale, Tay." I told her, very proud that she'd gotten into such an amazing college- and the one she'd been talking about since forever. She gave me a watery-eyed smile when we pulled away.
"I'll miss ya little buddy," she said. That was her weird nickname for me. "Little buddy." Even though we're 18, she's always called me that for some reason. "Try not to get in too much trouble."
I chuckled lightly. "I won't."
We hugged again before I moved on to Gabriella. Another friend I made in second grade when she was walking down the cement steps to the playground right in front of me and she tripped, fell, and scraped her knee and I called the playground teacher over and helped her to the nurses office.
"So this is it." She said to me with a small sad smile which I could only return.
"No, it's not," I told her. "You're gonna be half an hour away, Gab."
She nodded. "I know," she said. "But it's still not the same. You're not gonna be like right down the street anymore."
She leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek as I gathered her in a friendly hug.
"Have fun, Wildcat." She whispered to me. I smiled.
"Sure thing. See you soon?"
She nodded. "Soon."
Next it was Chad's turn, and before I could open my mouth to even get one word of goodbye in, the craziest thing happened as my best guy pal since we were children broke down in tears and threw his arms around me.
"Dude!" I exclaimed in partial shock and partial terror, awkwardly patting him on the back as the rest of the people around us could only stare and either try not to laugh or cry.
"Troy I'll miss ya, man!" My best friend exclaimed in between sobs, hanging on to me like there was no tomorrow.
"Me ah- me too, Chad." I responded, once again, awkwardly, kind of unsure of what to do to make his tears subside. He was clinging to me, blubbering like a baby, almost about as hard as my mother had been. We stood there like that for a while longer, him squeezing the life out of me and sobbing, until finally I just had to push him away.
He jumped back and cleared his throat, wiping away the tears.
*cough* "Mm...yeah..." he said. "Sorry about that. I just ah...had a lil' somthin' in my eye, you know." He said, rubbing his eyes. I nodded, unconvinced.
"It's...it's okay, man." I said, staring at him. "It's fine."
He stared back at me for a moment before something inside of him seemed to go off again and he threw himself at me once again, crying even harder then before. It took him a minute to pull back and contain himself.
"S-sorry," he said. "I really think somethin' flew in and stung my eye that time...ouch."
"Yeah...alright." I said and pat him on the shoulder.
"I'll be ready to kick your ass on the court in November." I told him with a wide grin, changing the subject, as Berkley and the U of A were set to play each other then. (hehe) He smirked.
"You're on!"
The grin dropped from my face then as I suddenly turned serious, remembering how he was going to be attending the same school as Sharpay. "Take care of Sharpay."
"Will do, brother." Chad nodded at me, as both of us chose to not comment on the fact that Sharpay was nowhere around.
"Alright," I said, giving him a knuckle touch before finally moving on to Ryan.
"Ryan," I said hopefully. "Still haven't heard of her?"
My other old friend shook his head sadly. "Sorry man," he said quietly, sounding genuinely sorry. "Called her just now. She still didn't answer."
I looked down and nodded slowly. All of us had already been waiting outside for a little while now with any last hope that she would show. It was 12:15 and I was already supposed to be gone as of fifteen minutes ago. But we'd held off for a few minutes, all secretly pleading that she would pop up on us. But she didn't. She didn't and none of is had a clue as to why.
"Well," I sighed, looking back up at Ryan, placing my hand on his shoulder. "Guess I'll just have to wait for her to call me later then."
Ryan pulled back the corner of his lip doubtfully. "I'm really sorry, dude."
I just nodded. I mean, what else could I do? Say "it's okay" ? Because it really wasn't. It was not okay. Sharpay was supposed to be here, so why the fuck wasn't she? It wasn't right. It was nothing but wrong that she was not here with me. For me. It was going to be months before I saw her again, and she'd even been telling me all along that she was going to miss me so much. So how could she not show on the day and moment I was leaving? Where was she and how could she not be here on literally the moment where I needed her the most?
"You comin' back for Christmas?" Ryan asked me, and I nodded yes. He nodded then, too.
"Me too. See ya then?"
" 'Course." I agreed before sharing a (completely!) manly hug with him.
After each personal goodbye, everyone- my closest friends and my parents, all gathered me in one big group hug and even though I'd told them all goodbye five minutes ago, I still took a little while longer to actually leave. I tried waiting around for as long as I could for Sharpay even though I had to accept that she was probably not gonna come, which was about five minutes, before my mom came up to me as I waited beside my truck away from everyone else.
"How are you doing, Troy?" she asked me in a sincere voice. I looked away from her and didn't respond.
"I'm....so, so sorry she's not here," she told me, probably not knowing what else to say. Even my own mother couldn't figure out what to say to me at a time like this. And I certainly didn't know what to say either. There were no words to describe the pain and anger and disappointment pulsing through my veins at this very moment. No words. How could she not show? My own girlfriend! How could Sharpay not be here? What was more important that she wasn't here? I'm not sure when the next time I talk to her will be, but she better have a pretty damn good excuse for not being here right now. I didn't even want to think about the amount of time it will probably take for me to forgive her. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to forgive her, and did she even want me to? Probably not, because if she gave a shit at all she would be here right now. She probably flat out didn't care. But...it just didn't make any sense! wasn't she the one arguing with me yesterday about staying? Or was that just it? Was she mad at me? Mad at me for not giving up Berkley and not going to community college? Mad enough to not even come and see me one last time until God knows when?!
If so, screw her then! If that was the case- if she was actually not showing up because she was mad at me, I can't even see my relationship with her working out beyond this point, because that's just...that's just low. Extremely low.
"Troy?" my mom's voice cut into my thoughts again. I finally turned and face her, sniffing, but not crying.
"I'm gonna go," I said, and she nodded slowly and sadly.
"I love you, Troy. My beautiful, beautiful, grown up son," she said to me, tears filling her eyes once again. I smiled back.
"I love you too, mom." I said, giving her one last tight squeeze before climbing into my truck.
"Don't get too lonely with me out of the house." I told my mother, rolling down the window, at least attempting to part ways with her on a lighter note. She flashed me a tearful smile as my dad came up behind her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders and they both waved at me.
I pulled away from the curb, honking and waving back at my parents and dear old friends, the thought of Sharpay still spooking my brain.
-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-
If you've ever tried sleeping on a sheet of cold metal with bags and bags of luggage surrounding you in a tiny dark cramped area, then you should be able to understand my pain and discomfort.
Much like last night, I don't even remember when I fell asleep. I just remember how I woke up just now: someone pounding or tapping or whatever-ing the side of the "room" I was in. I sat up quickly, almost banging my head on the ceiling of the car, having forgotten for a moment where I was. I looked around, thinking; where the hell am I? because all I could tell from my surroundings was that I was in a very dark place with little bits of light peeking through holes in the middle and bottom corners. It took me a little while to remember where I was exactly and what my purpose of being here was.
"Hey man," I held my breath as I heard the warning masculine voice outside. "Easy on the exterior. This thing is already falling apart."
I knew that voice. I could recognize that voice anywhere. I mean- what girl wouldn't be able to recognize the voice of her own boyfriend?
"Sorry, just tryina' test the strength of this baby, bro." An even deeper voice answered with a hint of redneck in his accent. I wish I could see the time on the little golden watch my parents gave me for my last birthday. I was completely brain dead as to what time it was and it was too dark in the back of Troy's truck where I was to be able to tell. How long had I been in here? And how long had he...we...he...been driving? How long had I been sleeping? I didn't know. I had no clue. All I knew was I was tired of laying down in this horrible cramped up position, my neck hurt like a bitch on Monday morning, and I wanted out of here!
I listened carefully as the two male voices seemed to fade further and further away before finally deciding after a little while that the coast was clear. Then, I leaned forward and felt around a little bit for the door handle to push open and forward to let myself out. Usually, Troy kept the top/back part of his truck off but I guess he just had to have it on to make his long road trip from Albuquerque to California. Which sucked because of how tiny and cramped it was especially when he had all that stupid luggage in there, providing less space for me to squeeze in between, but I suppose it made for a better hiding place so who am I to complain?
My legs were a little bit wobby and the bright rays of sun hurt my eyes a bit as I crawled awkwardly out of the back of the car. I stretched my arms up and groaned. It felt so good to finally move around a bit.
After regaining the feeling in all movable parts of my body, I finally looked around to try and figure out where I was. It didn't take long for me to realize that I was standing outside at a gas station, right in front of one of the oil tanks. I glanced around the side of the truck and saw the gas nozzle sticking into the gas hole in the side, feeding the truck oil.
"Excuse me, but did you just crawl out from the back of that truck or are my eighty three year old eyes playing tricks on me?"
I whirled around quickly upon hearing the voice and ended up facing an elderly woman who stood frozen by her little red Honda Civic, holding another gas nozzle in her shaking hands. I smiled as politely as I could. It wouldn't be that hard to make a senior citizen believe you weren't a total creeper, right? I mean...I might as well just tell her the truth.
"Yes, yes in fact you did..." I said, "I was actually just hiding out in the back of my boyfriend's vehicle because I'm not ready to say goodbye to him yet as he leaves for college over a thousand miles away from home."
I, Sharpay Evans, am certainly a lot of things, but shockingly enough, compulsive liar is not one of them...well, most of the time. Why would an 83 year old care anyway? It's not like she was going to do anything about it. I saw her fake, drawn-on little eyebrows raise quickly before she turned away, focusing her attention back on filling her gas tank to her vehicle. I could've sworn I heard her mutter "the things crack is doing to teenagers these days," but I didn't have much time to think about it before a different extremely recognizable voice from behind me suddenly exclaimed;
"SHARPAY!?"
I couldn't whip around fast enough. My lips curled up into a nervous, quavering smile at the sight of my boyfriend's shocked, adorable looking face as a small bag of what was probably random junk food items from the AM/PM mini mart he'd just walked out of, fell out of his hands to the ground beneath him.
"I'm hallucinating, right?!" Troy exclaimed, advancing towards me with a look of caution. His whole face had gone flour-pale as if he was seeing a ghost.
"No...I-" I stopped, "you're not." I answered carefully, not knowing really what I should do to handle him in this shocked far beyond belief state. But the closer he got to me, the more worried I suddenly became because of him in freak out mode.
"You...you're really here!" He practically shouted once he seemed to have gotten a better, closer look at me, and I could sense the old lady staring at us from behind me, but I didn't care. Troy grinned and laughed. "You're here! Oh my fucking god...you're here!"
He threw his arms around me then in a gleeful embrace, squeezing and holding me tighter than those blood pressure things squeeze your arm whenever you get your blood pressure checked. God. Like he thought I'd been dead or something. Then again.....how far away from Albuquerque were we?
"Troy...air...can't...breathe." I choked out as he knocked the wind out of me simply by hugging me so tight. Not that I didn't enjoy the feel of his strong arms around me, gripping me tightly, but a girl needs to breathe!
"Sorry," he said, pulling away from me but still grinning like an idiot and keeping his hands firmly on my arms as if I would float away otherwise or something. "I just can't believe you're here...actually here..." he went on to babble for several more seconds about how I was "here", until the grin dropped from his face suddenly and contorted into pure confusion.
"...What are you doing here?!"
I didn't answer, I just looked at him, making sure to have innocence written all over my face. He finally seemed to have gotten over his shock/confusion/happiness and whatever else had been there before, because he suddenly dropped his hands from my arms and took a careful step back.
"You...where the were you all morning?!" he exclaimed, staring at me like I was an alien from another planet as the questions started to spurt from his mouth left and right.
"Why haven't you been answering your phone?!"
"Why are you here now?!"
"Why weren't you there to say bye?!"
"What the fuck, Sharpay?!"
But before I could answer any of his demanding questions, I had a question of my own.
"Where are we?" I asked, meaning, what town or state are we in? I knew we were at a gas station somewhere...but where?
Troy blinked at me. "Tuba City," he said, "Arizona."
Sweet freaking lord! That meant I'd been asleep in his car for, what...five hours? Six even? I think Tuba City was a little over four hours away from Albuquerque by car..but I'd climbed into Troy's truck probably a little after ten after walking there several blocks on foot. I wouldn't of been sure where to park my own car around his house otherwise without it going noticed , so I'd just decided to leave it at home.
"What time is it?" I asked him then, and he replied
"Time for you to tell me what the fuck you're doing here, two hundred and seventy three miles away from home!"
"I looked down at the ground hesitantly, wondering how he would take the news of me being in the back of his truck this whole time. Would he be mad? Oh yes. I knew Troy...he would be furious. But I had been expecting that.
"I couldn't say goodbye," I whispered, my eyes burning into the tops of my shoes. I could just imagine the incredulous look on his face right about now.
"What?"
His tone of voice gave it all away.
I scratched the bridge of my nose. "I couldn't say bye to you," I repeated, speaking a little louder. "You're not supposed to leave yet."
"What are you talking about?" Troy asked me, obviously dumbfounded. "Yeah...I have to...or I won't make it to school in time."
"No, Troy." I said, looking up at him. "Don't you get it? You're not supposed to be going yet! It just..it doesn't seem right for you to be going now, it's too soon!"
Apparently deciding to not comment on that, he questioned me next how I ended up here in a freakishly soft voice..
"I hid in the back of your car," I admitted, unsure of what he would say, but knowing he would be angry by that fact for one simple reason- it was dangerous.
"ARE YOU CRAZY?!" Troy screamed at me, apparently forgetting that we were in a public outdoors place and there were a few people watching us.
"You're telling me that all these hours have gone by, me and everyone else back home wondering where the hell you were, and you were in my car the whole time??"
I was too worried by his loud, frantic tone to say or do anything, even though yeah, that was pretty much it.
"My god- you're a...you're an idiot!"
My eyes instantly snapped up to his at that insult, widening in shock. It'd been a while since he'd ever insulted me since he'd decided to stop being a total jerk the day a few months back when he confessed to liking me and asked me to prom. But did he really just call me an idiot?
I guess I kind of was for doing what I did, I was aware of my actions and that they could be seriously dangerous in that horribly uncomfortable cramped up space in the back of his car, but that still didn't mean he had to go on and call me that! Especially since I did it for him and...for us.
I think he was too shocked/mad to notice or the clearly insulted look on my face. Or if he did, he certainly didn't care, because he kept right on going with the words.
"You could've suffocated!" Troy loudly informed me, advancing towards me. I stumbled back nervously, wondering what he was doing now. I didn't know but I sure didn't like how he was acting....it really was freaking me out and it would probably safe to not be too much near him while he was like this, but I didn't have much time to get away and I wasn't quick enough because he grabbed me before I could make a run for it.
"You're so stupid, Sharpay! You could've died back there!" He shouted in my face. I was still too much frozen in terror to do anything. I was positive that there was no way that Troy would ever act violent towards me, especially not in front of other people who were complete strangers, but that didn't stop me from being completely horrified at the way he held on to me with way too much force and yelled in my face. I knew that even though it seemed like he was going to, he wasn't going to hit me. He would never hit me. But I was still afraid of him in this state anyway. He really needed to back off a bit. And although I wasn't expecting him to hit me, I sure as heck wasn't expecting him to do what he did do...which was kiss me.
I didn't even have a second to respond to his kiss before he pulled away just as fast as his mouth had come crashing down on mine in the first place.
"Tell me what were you thinking?! That was the stupidest thing ever!" Troy exclaimed, and then kissed me again- hard and harsh, sending chills down my spine. He sounded less frantic then before but still kind of mad about the whole thing. I placed my arms around his neck, letting my fingers tease the ends of his hair on the back as I pressed my lips with equal fervor against his, not caring anymore about him calling me an idiot and that I was stupid. Hey, I was for staking out the back of his truck. But had I not done it, I wouldn't be kissing him right now. I'd probably be back home in my room, sulking pitifully because he was gone.
"I was thinking it's not time for you to go." I responded quietly after we pulled away, looking him dead in the eye, our faces still close together in after-stance of our lip lock.
"It's not time for me to go?" Troy repeated in question form, his hands resting on my lower back. "Or you're not ready to let me?"
I raised one eyebrow slightly, my lips barely parted as I felt wetness come about my once dry orbs.
"Both." I whispered gently, and I saw his adams apple move for a second as he swallowed before sliding his arms fully around me in an enduring clutch as he rested his chin atop my head.
And then unexpectedly, after all these days I've somehow managed to keep myself from shedding tears, minus the one I accidentally let escape and roll down my cheek yesterday in my room before I fell asleep on Troy, it was like some valve opened up inside me which allowed me to release the buckets of juice from my eyes at once nonstop without a moment of interference.
I cried into Troy's shoulder for an abiding while, moisture load after moisture load of waterworks rushing from both my eyes to drench his shirt- choking sob noises present and all.
He didn't say anything to me in order to stop the oceans of tears from flowing. Not a word. All he did was clench his appendages around me oh so very tightly and let me cry against him for however long I needed to, which was just the way it should be.
And then, later, after what seemed like hours of my endless bawling, we got into his car (I actually rode in front this time) and drove for several long miles after him saying that we really needed to talk about all of this. But all that resulted in was us finding a vacant lot that he pulled into after a while of driving around aimlessly and after maybe two minutes of us "talking" we ended up making love for the first time, right there, in his truck.
-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-|-
"You know you have to go back, right?" Troy asked me carefully. I inhaled and then exhaled deeply as I laid back against him. We were still in his car, laying on the rather small upholstered sitting area in the front.
"I know." I said, staring up at the roof of the truck as he affectionately rubbed my bare shoulder.
"But how am I going to get back? I'd hate for you to have to drive back over two hundred and whatever amount you said miles."
"We'll work out something." Troy told me, and I just continued to lay back in silence, loathing that I for sure was probably going to be sent home tonight, probably by plane or something.
"Just...no more hiding out in the back of my truck, alright?" he reasoned with me with a light nervous chuckled. I smiled to myself and rolled my eyes, remember the dramatic scene between us at the gas station.
"Fine," I agreed reluctantly.
"By the way, why didn't you answer your phone at all today not even once? Do you not have it with you?"
"I was in a hurry to get ready and get moving this morning before someone noticed me climbing into your car that you don't keep locked!" I giggled, "I must've left it plugged into the charger."
"Now that's really unlike you." Troy teased me.
"Shut up," I said, and then both of us continued to lay there, unmoving and nonspeaking for what felt like a pretty long time, before he spoke up again.
"You know," he started, "I was pretty...I don't know...I just felt....really awful when you weren't at my house earlier."
I snuggled deeper into his side. "I'm sorry."
"Everyone else was there, and we couldn't stop wondering where you were," Troy said, "I even, you know...drove to the park, thinking you might be there with Boi."
I glanced sideways at him, internally wondering how he could've thought I would've chosen taking my dog on a walk over him the day he was leaving. Then again, I couldn't blame him...he probably hadn't known what else to do, as I'm sure he never would've thought to just check the trunk of his very own vehicle.
"But when you weren't there...I just...I didn't know what to do. Shar, we even waited for several minutes, hoping you'd show up but you didn't."
"Troy? Yeah, if you're trying to make me feel guilty....it's working. I'm really sorry," I repeated. I actually was sorry...I know how dumb I'd been acting not just this whole day, but this whole week, all just because I didn't want him to go to Berkley...and because I'm still a firm believer that he's not supposed to yet.
"What I did today was selfish, stupid, not well thought out at all, risky, dangerous, unthoughtful, spur of the moment, unbelievable, time consuming, and just overall idiotic."
"It was," Troy agreed with me, "...and yeah, maybe you should feel a little guilty about it for making us all wonder in pain and agony, especially me. But you know what?"
He sat up on his elbow and looked down at me, admiration sparkling about his gorgeous crystal clear optical orbs of blue that I love and adore and am going to miss so damn much.
"It was also brave, strong, amazing, incredible, daring, loving, caring, and completely you, and I love that you did it, because otherwise I would've been almost halfway to California, alone, by now."
I grinned up at him, my wonderful boyfriend that I'd only been with for a few months but that I had known for over ten years and was already deeply in love with, and reached up to gently run my hand back through his already tousled hair.
"I love you," I told him, meaning every single word with every particle of my soul, mind, and body as I massaged his hairline with my thumb.
"and I love you." Troy responded expectantly, flashing me his perfect gleaming white all-star grin.
And as he leaned down to kiss me again in order to start off another round of what we'd done for the first time ever probably around ten minutes beforehand, I think I realized exactly what the unfinished business between the two of us was and had been all alone and what will probably be forever as long as we continue to be together.
At first I guess I'd pretty much assumed that as weird as it was, maybe sex...maybe that was what we needed to do before he went off to college without me, because we'd done...other stuff, we'd just never gone all the way before today. But even after we were finished that first time, and even though we were about to do it again now, I still had that empty feeling inside me. And I know I didn't feel empty because I wasn't actually happy with him and I didn't actually love him- because I do, I love him with everything that I have and I know that the feeling is mutual between us. But that's the thing- just now, when I told him I love him, and he said it back...something just clicked. Maybe us having sex or better yet making love was the final factor in me realizing what our unfinished business was since we'd been exchanging those three words with each other all summer, but it wasn't the business itself. It was just one step further and the final step to figuring out what it was because I didn't realize until now that what mine and Troy's unfinished business was.
So what is it, then?
Love.
And that empty feeling? That? Yeah, I'm thinking it will be there forever, no matter if I'm in New Mexico and Troy's in California or if were happy and right on top of each other like right now,
because love...real love...it's never finished.
A/N: The crying scene with Chad/Troy; lol, right? :P I had that in mind from the moment I started this story, only to realize as I was writing that part that hey that it's already been used before. :( booo! In Zoey 101, the episode Goodbye Zoey, her guy friend Michael is totally bawling like a baby when he's saying goodbye to her. I didn't mean to copy that though. xD and hey! my version was two guys, sooooo...yeah. lol.
The scene where Troy was yelling at Sharpay about how stupid and idiotic she was while at the same time bi-polar-ishly kissing her; TITANIC! duh! The scene where Rose is being lowered off the ship into that little canoe thing but then at the last second jumps back onto the ship where she then runs to meet Jack and he does the same thing with her.
And, of course, all the amazing sweet fluffy Troypay writers on this very website were my other inspirations! My mind was bouncing to lines and scenes and such of many of your guys' stories! Not to say that I was copying everyone and have absolutely no originality, but I guess some things just reminded me of....oh whatever you know what I mean. I'll just shutthefukkup now. Final "inspiration" was for once real things used in HSM 3. Like the real colleges everyone's going to.
Please take the time to review! (even if you hated it.) So I can get some kind of feedback on these thousands of words that I typed out. (The second part of these three stories, Complicated, only got 8 reviews. D: bummerrrrrrr!)
Pretty please? :) you know how we do.
-Serena/HeSaidSheSaidx :)