So I sit here. That's all I do now. Is sit here on this empty, gray, beach. The waves have not reached me, but they will, soon.
The school bell no longer chimes in my ears, though I wish it did. To keep me sane and whole. I can no longer here my peers whisper to me, "I dare you to kiss him!" No. Those words I can no longer hear, laugh, and then take upon the challenge. I can no longer go up to him and rap my two hands around his soft smooth neck. I can no longer fell his tickling touch as he brings his finger tips around my waist. Nor can I fell him nibble upon my neck. I will never again tilt his face heavenward to my face and then go in to kiss his soft plump lips.
I shall never again look into to his soft hazel eyes. Nor the perfect shape of his body.
Why?
Because he left and took my heart with him.
The waves are getting closer as the get more aggressive.
Oh but what of my family…
To my mother, I love you and you have been the greatest teacher to me.
To my father, there has never been such a forgiving father that I have even known of, and I will miss your warm hugs.
To my brother, you are truly the best playmate any sister could ever ask for and be strong.
To my grandparents, I love you and will continue to inspire others as it did me.
To my Uncles, Aunts, and cousins, I do love you no matter how far the connection.
To all my friends, thank you for our friend ship.
To my dearest Matthew, you I have loved the most, do not regret me nor my death, for each moment I spent living I spent it loving you. I hate to leave you and this world. But I cannot take the insanity any more.
Are you happy now, my phantom, the one that lurks in my head. Telling me to join you. Well, here I am and I'm coming. To be happy, to kiss your soft plump lips and stair into your hazel eyes.
The waves have now reached the tip of my toes and my shines. The sky is starting to get dark with the clouds above me crackling and thundering loud noises. As the waves continue up my body I see a white stream of light out on the water. The only light I have seen in hours. And it is beckoning me. I stare at it and an Angel starts to descend onto the water. It is you! My phantom, my Jordan.
I stand to my feet and go out onto the water. Each step as light as a feather, stepping onto the water. I am coming my phantom, what you had always wanted from me!
You gaze off. What is the matter? I look in the same direction your lovely gaze seems to be lost in.
It's another young boy. He is my age and screaming my name.
It's…Matthew. Do not grow angry! Stay blue! Don't let your red aurora show!
He comes running to me. I stair with a blank expression on my face. Colliding with a strong force he lifts me and twirls me around. He whispers in my ear how long he looked for me, how much he missed me, how much he loves me. I turn our bodies in a swaying motion so I can look at my phantom once more. I see tears on your face. Don't cry…Thank you for smiling...goodbye. So I wave as you fly back into heaven. As you leave me the tears streamed down my face as well. Matthew tilts my head heavenwards and I look into his hazel, yellow tinted eyes and he leans forward to kiss me. I continue to cry, and let the tears fall. The stream of light vanished and the rain starts to fall.
My Jordan, I do love you, but you must understand! I can't keep living like this! I will always be in the wings, but till you return home. I have to try and be happy without you. Thank you for letting me have my heart back.
I will always love you.