The Very Bloody Battle.
By Wasabikitty10.
"Luffy, are you sure this is a good idea?!" Zolo whisper-shouted at the captain.
"Of course! We get back at Nami by stealing her cookies! It's a great idea!"
"Shh! You need to be quiet, Luffy, if you want it to work." They quietly crept into the kitchen, and noticed the cupboard was shining.
"The cookies..." The two friends murmured as they searched.
"I have them! Mint Milano!" Luffy crowed.
"Shut up!" Zolo dumped several cookies into his mouth, and handed the bag to Luffy.
(Yucky chewing spitting and slimy scenes go here)
Finally the cookies were gone. Zolo, feeling bored, asked, "Do you think I have more fangirls than you?"
"No way! I pwn!"
"Hmmm." Zolo picked up a letter. "Dear Zolo," He read. "I love you so much! I seriously kiss your picture every night. You are so beautiful! Love, --WK."
Luffy growled. "Dear... Lu-luffy," He read. "I would like you if you were smart." He stomped on the letter hard. "I'm cool too, right?"
"Sure, Luff. Sure."
Luffy grabbed a sword Zolo had put down and jumped around, saying, "Cool! Look! I'm cool like Zolo!"
"Put that down! You'll kill yourself!"
"No I won't!" Luffy's hands slipped, however. The tip cut a gash in Zolo's face, and scratched the kitchen floor.
"Ow!" Zolo yelled. He threw a banana at Luffy, who inflated himself into Gum-Gum balloon. Unfortunately, Zolo stabbed him with a sword, making a huge river of blood come out.
"Zolo! That hurts! Awww!" Luffy yelled.
"Good! It's supposed to!"
They would have gone on forever if Nami and Sanji hadn't burst in.
"Luffy! Zolo! Are you ok?!"
"Who did this to my kitchen?!"
"I'm fine, I'm fine." Said Luffy, as he bled all over the place.
"You are not fine, and it's going to get worse!" Yelled Zolo.
"Who did this to my kitchen!" Sanji yelled.
"Luffy."
"But I did it with Zolo's sword, so it's his fault!"
"You little rat!"
The two began to fight. Nami watched in disbelief, and turned away, disgusted. She caught sight of an empty bag- labelled: "Nami's Cookies."
"You creeps!" She jumped at them and sliced at random until Luffy punched her back. Nami hit into Sanji, who was suffering from mental breakdown-itis. How dare they ruin his kitchen and ciggie stash and food stash all at the same time?! He stomped on Nami and yelled at her to quit eating all the food. She yelled back that Luffy ate all the food. Luffy bawled and blamed it on Zolo.
Soon everyone was bleeding. Nami tried to kill Luffy several times, but he always punched her away. Then, she was attacking from behind, when...
"GUM GUM HOSE!!" A steady stream of blood soaked her, completely ruining her outfit. "Ahh! Ahh! My clothes!" She tried to stab him but missed and hit Usopp.
"Ow!"
"When the heck did you get here?!"
Usopp crawled under the table and cowered.
Nami kicked him, and decided that since she couldn't safely attack Luffy or Zolo, why not beat up Sanji, who was already badly hurt? She ran over and began stabbing Sanji with her small dagger in random places. "Take that, Luffy!" She yelled.
Luffy found a new attack he could use. "Gum gum... Rainfall!" He squirted blood at the ceiling which spread and rained down steadily. Nami shrieked when a drop landed on her treasure map. She folded it into a paper airplane and threw it out of the kitchen, then screamed, "You asked for it, Rubber-boy!"
Then she shredded the skin on Sanji's legs. Poor Sanji was lying on the kitchen floor, repeating over and over, "My kitchen. My ciggies. My legs. My kitchen..."
Zolo tried to get into a cupboard to hide from the crazies. Soon he was curled up, and hidden- untill Luffy sprayed a Gum Gum hose at him. "Ahh! Luffy you freak!" Zolo shouted as he fell to the ground and was repeatedly punched. The kitchen was bright red, which clashed with Sanji's new blue plates. By the way, Sanji had just gotten Nami's signature carved into his back. He was still chanting about his poor kitchen. "Red, no... nooooo..." And generally losing it.
Nami was clawing Sanji's legs. Zolo was slashing at things, but missing because of the slash on his face bleeding in his eyes. Luffy was Gum Gum Hosing random stuff because he could see nothing but blackish-purple and red. Also he was dizzy. Ussop was hurt the least, but continued to scream, "I'm dying!"
Finally, at five in the morning, the warriors fell to the ground unconcious. Thank God. Any longer and they'd be dead.
((AN- I am in no way responsible for any sudden extinction this may have caused!))