Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore Girls.
This was requested from someone on Tumblr and I just rolled with it. Hope you enjoy!
She's awake before him which usually never happens. Being awake this early should be illegal. But today, as the daylight is just breaking through the gauzy pink curtains, she's awake and watching him while he's still peacefully asleep. Whenever she catches him watching her while she sleeps, she always comments on how it's creepy. Secretly it's endearing. Creepily endearing. Still she likes watching him sleep, it's intimate.
It's terrible to say, or think since she's not really talking to anyone but herself in her own head, but she's surprised at just how big a role intimacy plays in their relationship. Especially when it's concerning their sex life.
Before they got together, she would often wonder how Luke would be in bed. It was usually a fleeting moment brought on by the rare moments she was alone in the diner watching him work. That's when she discovered she had a thing for his hands. Or moments when they were toeing the line between friendship and lovers. If only one of them had the courage to speak up or make the first move.
When they finally got together, and she means finally in the most exasperated way, they both agreed it had been a long time coming. Eight years in the making. Their first time that night was a build up of those first kisses shared months ago, of countless phone calls shared while he was away, of their interrupted kisses when he finally got back into town, and of the eight long years they spent dancing around one another. In another words, it was hot, full of passion, and definitely better than anything she ever dreamed about with him.
Their second time that night was slower. It's when she learned just how intimate he could be when the moment was right. It's when she also learned that intimacy played a huge part in elevating sex from just sex to making love.
With Christopher, sex had always been just sex. It wasn't a terrible thing, sex with him was almost always fun. But, in the moments after when they were both sweaty and trying to catch their breath, a longing for something more lingered. She pushed it away because he managed to satisfy her more times than not but still that feeling that there should be more lingered around. And because he was always there telling her how much he enjoyed their time together and how great she was and how great they were together. And they were, at least for the most part.
Lorelai didn't realize what was missing from her sex life with Christopher until her sex life with Luke came along. That's when she found out was missing. The intimacy. The moments after when she no longer wanted for something more, when she no longer felt like there was something missing because he had satisfied her in ways that no one else, even Christopher, ever had.
It was how Luke took the time to sometimes slowly build her up and even ease her down after her high. How he lavished her body with kisses before, during, and after. How he always made the effort to make sure that she was satisfied. How well he knew her body and what she liked, even on the first night. How it was the first time she ever saw him as vulnerable. How they moved so in sync like they had been practicing for years.
Even after their relationship fell apart and she went back to Christopher, those moments were desperately missing from her married sex life. She fooled herself into believing that those moments existed but in the after when Christopher was asleep, he had the tendency to fall asleep right after, and she was alone with her thoughts, she was faced with the truth. Her sex life with Luke wasn't in the same ballpark as hers with Christopher's.
Luke's was a World Series kind of life while Christopher's was the intramural team of guys desperately clinging to their high school glory days.
But then Luke came back into her life, bringing back all those little moments and so much more because of their time lost. They had a deeper understanding now. A realization of what was lost during those long, torturous months, and the realization that they weren't going to lose each other again. And they expressed that through their love-making.
Sex with Luke was never just sex. It never had been. Even from the first night, she would call it making love rather than sex. Even in the moments when they were both uninhibited and the best term to describe their night was primordial, there was always something more. And she never wanted to use that term before. Not before Luke. But now that was the only thing that defined what they were and how they moved together.
Lorelai smiles when she notices that he's waking up. She snuggles back down in bed and comes to eye level with him before she presses a kiss to his lips. His eyelids flutter before he's fully awake.
"Were you watching me sleep?" he asks.
She shakes her head and denies it. "Nope."
She grins when he doesn't fight it but instead lifts up his arms and whispers a sleepy 'come here'. She obliges, cuddling up to him. Her head on his chest and one of her legs thrown across both of his. This is the moment she was talking about. Scratch that…thinking about. The ones where it's just them, the before and the after when they're just holding one another close and not talking because words aren't needed. One of the few times in her life that she doesn't feel the need to fill the silence with endless babbling.
He's here and he's holding her close, stroking her back lightly and pressing kisses into her hair. And she's content. No longer longing for something that's always been missing with everyone else. She has everything that she needs. Everything that she's ever wanted.
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