AN: Hey ! So this is my uptake on how the scene between Silas and Elena should have gone during 5x02. However, instead of it being Silas pretending to be Stefan, it was really Stefan (if that makes sense.. haha). I also got inspired by the song 'I try' by Ben Taylor which I think describes Stelena SO well !
I will be updating 'It Should Have Been Her' soon :)
Enjoy the story and let me know what you think of this story :)
Games changes and fears
Where will they go from here
When will they stop
Elena was wondering through campus while talking on the phone to Damon. Something was off about that microbiology teacher. Not only did he forge Megan's death certificate, but he instantly knew that Caroline and Elena weren't in his class. How was it possible that he had spotted them straight away when there were at least a hundred other students. Elena had to talk to somebody other than Caroline. Someone who didn't know the teacher, a third party person. She knew that talking to Damon would do her some good, as if taking a weight off of her shoulders. She didn't expect Damon to have all the answers to her questions, but it just felt good to talk to him. As Elena had suspected, Damon of course had asked whether she had compelled the teacher, or threatened him or even tortured him. In a weird and strange way, it made Elena laugh and she was glad that even from a distance he was able to put a smile on her face. As she kept on walking and listening to Damon, her stomach started twirling, as if a net of butterflies being released. She suddenly got nervous but at the same time she couldn't stop herself from smiling. It was the exact same feeling she had whenever he was around, or whenever she would hear his voice. Stefan. She felt like her heart was being tied by strings and being pulled to an unknown destination by an invisible source. Elena looked at the ground while a million questions raced through her mind as Damon kept on talking. Was she actually really head of heels in love with Damon? Enough to have the same feeling she had when she was with Stefan? Had she finally cut that cord that kept pulling at her heart whenever Stefan was around? As she lift her head, all her questions were answered and it was a simple 'no'. He was here. Stefan was here. Standing right in front of her with his gray washed out jeans and a blue shirt. A smile formed on her lips; a smile that she had no control over.
"Stefan?" she asked as if making sure that it was actually him, and not some sick joke that her mind was playing on her.
"I don't know, probably mope at him. Huh," answered Damon with an easy tone, as if his brother hasn't been missing for the last three months.
"Stefan is here, right now," Elena cleared up Damon's misunderstanding.
Now, I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together, girl
But we're not
"Turn off your phone," Stefan said as he locked eyes with Elena. As if under compulsion, she immediately followed instructions. She didn't care that she was hanging up on her boyfriend. All she cared about was the fact that Stefan was right there in front of her. His deep eyes were greener than ever and his jawline was even more defined than she could remember. He gave her a small smile, glad to see her again.
"I know you're upset that I didn't call, so I just wanted to apologize in person," Stefan started off. Elena looked at him for a while before throwing her arms around his neck. Those three months without him were hard for her. She knew she had caused him an immense amount of pain by choosing Damon, but she still needed him in her life. She still needed to know that he was going to be okay. The second that she felt his arms around her waist, she sighed slightly, relieved that he would return the hug.
"Never do that again," Elena said while still in his embrace. "I thought something terrible happened to you," she added while releasing him and gliding her hands down his biceps
"Well, something terrible did happen to me. You fell in love with my brother," Stefan answered without second thoughts. He knew it was going to be a douche move coming from him, but she had to know.
"Ouch," she answered while guiding her look towards the floor; guilt reopening healing scars.
"Can't blame me for needing a bit of space."
"I know. Where did you go?" she asked desperate to change the conversation.
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
And I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin'
"Ah, it's not important. I'm sure Damon will fill you in eventually."
"You talked to Damon? Because i just spoke to him and he didn't really say anything," Elena said, not sure how to take on the fact that Damon knew that Stefan was alive but didn't mention anything. Was he scared that she would go running back to Stefan ? Did he sense it coming ?
They had started walking again and were getting to a quieter part of campus. There were a few more trees and not as many students. A few wooden picnic tables were scattered around the area. Some students were doing their homework while others were eating whatever snack they got from the cafeteria. Elena sat down on one of the tables while Stefan sat opposite her.
"Where did you go?" Elena asked again, this time more persistent.
"Why do you care so much? I haven't been around for three months, so what? I was away while you were with.. Damon," he replied choking out the last word before looking down at his feet. He wasn't going to tell her that he was at the bottom of the quarry having dreams about her.
"Stefan..." was her only response. She could sense that he wasn't telling her the truth. She placed her hand on top of his on the table but as soon as she felt that familiar jolt of electricity, she retreated.
"Why is it that you can always see right through me?" he asked with a slight chuckle. There was a pause between them before Stefan decided to speak up. "I didn't go away, Elena. I was at the bottom of the quarry for three months," he said bluntly.
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though i try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near
Elena gasped at his words. "Oh my god," she whispered as the realisation hit her. She placed her hands on the side of her face, scrunching up her hair at the front. "I knew I should have said something to someone, anyone. Throughout all summer I've been having this pit in my stomach that there was something wrong with you. I kept having those dreams where I was with you and then I would feel like I was suffocating and jolt awake every single time and..."
"Woah woah wait. You had dreams about me?" Stefan asked.
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near
Elena took a while to answer before saying, "They didn't feel like dreams though, they felt like hallucinations, like I've either done it before or I was actually at that place but it felt so vivid," she said trying to get it all out of her system while still making sense. "And I couldn't talk to Damon because you're his brother and it would get awkward. If I had told Caroline she would give me a lecture of how you're my soulmate and that it's some unexplained connection, which it is !" she rambled on.
Stefan looked at the table and smiled at what Caroline would have said according to Elena. Soul mates. He laughed internally at how cruel that joke was.
"Would it surprise you if I told you that I was trying to reach out to you?" he asked her in a calm tone while lifting only his gaze onto Elena's face. "Once again, you're the one person that has kept me from switching it all off. Ironically."
"Stefan," Elena started while looking everywhere but at his face. She couldn't watch the pain she had caused in his mossy green eyes.
I may appear to be free
But I'm just a prisoner of your love
"Elena, if you're going to apologise, please don't," Stefan asked of her. "You've made your choice and I respect that. But know that you're always going to be the love of my life and even if I move on, I will always know that what he had was epic," he finished while standing up from the table. He couldn't bare to look at Elena. Her eyes were filled with tears threatening to spill. She was trying to smile to to reduce the pain, but it wasn't getting her anywhere. He walked a few steps before she called out to him. Elena could feel a part of herself being ripped out with every step that he was taking away from her.
And I may seem all right and smile when you leave
But my smiles are just a front
Just a front, hey
"Stefan, please don't go," she said as she also got up from the table ready to chase him if she had to.
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
And I'll try to keep my cool, but I'm fiendin'
"You can't keep asking me to stay," he answered while turning around. "You're in college and you've got a boyfriend and I'm sure you're going to have your 'happily ever after', but you need to let me go and have my 'happily ever after'."
"I just want to know that you'll be okay," she whimpered as her first tear strolled down her cheek. Stefan walked back to her and placed both hands on the side of her face. He wiped away her tear with his thumb.
"Elena, answer this for you, alright? It's just the both of us right now and there's no one around who might overhear us. There's no pressure of saying something that will make everyone happy. So answer my question honestly, for your own sake."
"There's the pressure of saying the right thing not to disappoint you," she said.
"Do you love Damon?" he asked as if she hadn't talked. Elena stayed silent and looked at the beautiful face that were only inches away from hers. She was trying to give her answer through her look but Stefan wasn't buying any of it. He wanted to hear her speak her thoughts. At that point, Elena completely let her guard down and broke down into his arms. Stefan wrapped his arms around her shoulder and he instantly knew what her answer was to his question.
"No. No, I don't," Elena sobbed into his shirt. "Bu-ut-ut i felt l-l-like I owned it to him because i was s-sired to him and then i switch off my humanity switch. I-I-I f-felt like I had to give him a chance," she started while still sobbing. She breathed in and then continued. "Earlier, while I was talking to him on the phone I felt exactly the same way I felt whenever you were next to me and for a second I thought that maybe, just maybe I was falling in love with him. But then I looked up, and those feelings... they were because of you. My body knew you were there even before I saw you. And a second ago when you told me that you had to look for your happy ending without me in it, I felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest."
"Shh, shhh. It's okay. I got you, I got you," Stefan soothed her tightening his grip around her shoulders and kissing the top of her head.
"No, it's not okay, Stefan! This is the first time that I felt what I've made you feel over and over again for months on end. Stefan, why don't you hate me? I've broken your heart more times than I can count and you're still here."
"It's because whether you're with me or my brother, you're always going to remain my first true love. There's a part of me that dies along with you whenever you're feeling unhappy. And it's also because deep down, you know the words to our story..."
"It's you and me, Stefan. Always," she quoted herself, finishing his sentence.
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My would crumbles when you are not near
Goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Through I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near.
AN: So that was it! I hope you enjoyed it- let me know what you think ! :)