A/N: This is a story that we wrote for English. Since our teacher totally loved it, we thought we could change it into a fanfic. :D another friend of ours added in for our English but then, she prolly wont see this so ha ha. It's in Fuji Yumiko's POV. And fyi, Yumiko's Shuusuke and Yuuta's sis(: enjoy!!! Oh and btw it is out first fic! So if it doesn't rock… Well, it's out first fic! xD That's our excuse hehe.
I was over at a friend's house, babysitting her little girl while she went out for her anniversary dinner with her husband. I looked around her vast house, my eyes taking in the beautifully but simply furnished rooms. I walked into the living room, only to find a little girl of about age 5 sitting at the coffee table, staring at a pile of flash cards that lay on the smooth surface of ebony.
Kneeling down beside her, I asked her for her name.
"Aiko," she whispered while turning her head away in bashfulness.
Trying to be affable, I smiled and said "Aiko is a really nice name. Are you learning colours right now?"
She blushed at the first comment and nodded at the second. I wanted to laugh at how adorable she was. Hiromi must be happy to come home to such a lovely daughter everyday. I looked at the stack of flashcards and decided I was going to teach Aiko the colours.
"Colours." Colours of the rainbow and more. Colours of my life. I looked into Aiko's innocent brown eyes, her carefree smile reminding me of the short period of childhood I had and treasured to this day. I chided myself, I was teaching her colours, not reminiscing about my past.
She lunged for a pink flashcard.
"Pink." Pink like my fairytale dress. I was five years old and everything had looked bright and shiny to me. I loved the colour; it reminded me of my favourite pink dress out of a western fairytale. I was truly happy and carefree, like Aiko was now. My parents had held a party for me in celebration of my fifth birthday. I remember myself walking in, wearing that very pink dress, the soft material swirling around my legs.
She lifted the green card from my lap.
"Green." Green with envy. My brother had been born then, and my parents had dedicated all their time to him. I was already nine years old and but still needed care and affection from them. I had once speculated murdering him, choking the child to death. At that time, I had thought that was the only method to get the attention I deserved from the two of them.
She hugged the blue card to her chest.
"Blue." Blue like the sky. I spent my days out in the yard, running around to my heart's content. Eleven years old, but still I longed for the love and adoration my parents gave whole-heartedly to Shuusuke. His eyes were almost the exact colour of the sky, everyone praised, but I never bothered to look at him. Another brother had been born: Yuuta. He wasn't as popular as Shuusuke was with the adults, but he received more attention than I did. I blended into the background, but sought solace in all things blooming in our garden instead, and whispered my heart's desires and deepest secrets to the wind.
She twisted the brown card skeptically in her hands.
"Brown." Brown like the dead soil on the ground. I was a flower in full bloom, but trampled to the ground by the people visiting the garden of my life. I lay on the ground, my soul stamped out of me, receiving no support from the family which was supposed to be my stem. Too concerned about Shuusuke and Yuuta, they were, and left me on the ground to rot. I was only a child, barely twelve years old. But my childhood had been crushed and I felt nothing could blossom in the dry soil abandoned in my heart.
She stared at the red card with wonder.
"Red." Red like blood spilling out from my shattered heart. My heart was filled with anger, at my parents, at all of those who ignored me. I had loved them with every breath that I took, but they were unable to reciprocate with that parental love I needed. My anger was directed at my brothers too, for they never included me in their games, and took our parents adoration and love all to themselves. My heart felt like puzzle pieces messed up and scattered around in my chest. I could not piece together that beautiful picture of which should be my life.
She distanced herself from the grey card.
"Grey." Grey like the heavy rain clouds that hung in the sky. My parents had died in a car accident, leaving a kid of only fourteen to survive with her two brothers. While others sent me their condolences, I was actually rejoicing and thankful on the inside, thankful for them disappearing from my life. The rain fell outside, splattering against the windowpane, but I felt no remorse or sadness fill my heart.
She held the black card to her face, peering at it with interest.
"Black." Black like my heart that was darkened by my evil thoughts. They clasped around my heart like thin steel wires, choking my breath and the blood out of me. Forcing the colour out of my life, and I felt the belated remorse hit me like a bullet only half a year after. Both Shuusuke and Yuuta had cried at their funeral, and had long let go and came to terms with the past. But for me, the repressed emotions were suddenly brought out when our homeroom teacher showed us a picture of a car wreck one day, and I ran out of the classroom sobbing. Counseling, that's what they suggested. I had neither the will nor energy to object as my mind retreated into darkness.
She used the white card to cover my face and giggled with mirth.
"White." White like the clouds that floated in the sky, like the complete blankness of my mind. Counseling helped. It released the worries and misery that clouded my mind. However, I never felt the happiness I had felt eleven years before, when pink was the only colour in my life. Shuusuke and Yuuta sometimes wondered where all my time went, and why I didn't spend all my time with them or love them like our parents did. I couldn't admit to them that it was because I didn't have the time, dedicating it to getting over the depression that caused my mind to be a blur of white.
She placed the indigo card between the blue and black cards.
"Indigo" Indigo like the skies just before dawn. Shuusuke would always wake up at dawn in an attempt to cook a decent breakfast for me with his clumsy hands. At first it was just burnt toast but as the days passed, Yuuta joined in, cooking together, just for me. I never realized how much they cared for me, nor how much I really loved them on the inside. I vowed to get better, for their sakes. They needed an adult in their lives, and I was the only one around to care for them.
She gasped in delight as she held up a yellow card for me to see.
"Yellow." Yellow like the rays of sunshine. My first ray of sunshine was in the form of a boy, compassionate and caring. I had just turned nineteen. He had stepped into my life with a kiss and I felt the love I had craved for with the gentle brush of his lips on mine. He watered my parched heart and patiently pieced together each puzzle piece. For the first time since my parents' death, I managed to smile from the bottom of my heart.
She poked at a purple card, fascinated.
"Purple." Purple like the colour of his garden gates. The boy who had managed to make me feel complete grinned at me, ushering me into his house. I stepped in; taking in every detail of the house I was soon going to be living in. I laughed freely, something I had lost the ability of until his arrival in my life. Things had just continued going uphill since then. We were engaged.
She smiled and picked up the pink card again, nuzzling it to her face.
"Pink." Pink like my reception dress. I felt like I was three years old again, but something was different. I had found my other half, my soul mate. I smiled as I took the wedding vow, pledging my life to his. We were finally and truly one.
I smiled down at Aiko, who still held the pink flash card in her arms. Taking the remainder of the flash cards, I taught her the rest of the colours. Aiko finally opened up to me, and even played a couple of games with me after learning about colours. I tucked her in bed, and brushed the dark hair out of her face. I watched her as she slept, and wondered if having a child of my own would bring me this much joy.