notes: Yay a new year fic! Also this is for fun, not a big fic. JUST A ONESHOT.
disclaimer: I don't own Fairy Tail.
But i do own these dumb resolutions?
warning: featuring some OCs who sure have really dumb names.
Shana: Interviewer
Masane: Cameraman
Shana: Welcome! This is a special interview, based on New Year resolutions, featuring our very own local guild, Fairy Tail. I am Shana and welcome back to Magnolia TV. *whisper* Masane, over here! This is a previous video, of last year's resolutions which unknowingly turned into a brawl!
Masane: *whisper* can't see..
Shana: *whisper* this is HD..
After fixing the camera
Shana: Okay! So we fixed some issues! So here we are in front of the Fairy Tail guild door.
*door opens*
Mirajane: Welcome to Fairy Tail. *gets hit by flying shoe*
Erza: Natsu! Gray! Stop it this once!
Mirajane: We'll be back after a few minutes! Uh, stay tuned?
Shana: OMG! Here we have our very own Titania Erza and Demon Mirajane! Woah! *ducks flying table* Masane turn it off!
Shana: Now here we are in the Guild Hall. Oh! And there is our own Salamander! So Natsu, what's your New Year resolution?
Natsu: Eh? What is ree-saw-loo-shun?
Gray: Idiot, it's something you want to improve for the following year!
Natsu: Oh..
Gray: You don't get it, do you?
Natsu: Nope.
Shana: Here is our own Ice Maker! Gray, what is your resolution?
Gray: Mine? I don't mean to brag but—
Juvia: Hey! Gray-sama is Juvia's, you freakface! *growls at Shana*
Shana: *backs away* Oh and here is Juvia the Water Maiden...
Gray: My resolution?
Shana: Continue *backs away from glaring Juvia*
Gray: My resolution is to be the best Ice Maker, which I already am, so I'll improve. And also beat Natsu in an epic battle. And also not strip.
Juvia: Kyah! *blushes*
Shana: Kyah! *nosebleeds*
Masane: Eh..Gray. Your clothes.
Gray: What the?!
Natsu: What the hell? If resolution means talking about things you can do better, then I'll also beat you in an epic battle!
Shana: Natsu, it means something you want to do, or improve for the following year.
Natsu: Oh I see. Then I'll try to find Igneel!
Shana: That's sweet! *fangirls*
Gray: What the hell?! You didn't understand when I said the same thing!
Masane: *scoffs* Shana, get off him.
Shana: I'm sorry! Now Juvia, what is your resolution?
Juvia: Win back Gray-sama.
Shana: But that's what you said last year...
Juvia: Oh, then Juvia will bring Natsu and Lucy together, so that Lucy won't be Juvia's love rival. And date Gray-sama and get married. Then get two kids and live in a huge villa. And Juvia will be cooking and Gray-sama will come back from work and —
Shana: OKAY! Moving on.
Shana: So here we have Lucy, Levy and Lisanna! What are you girls talking about?
Three of them: *blushes* Oh nothing!
Shana: Oh really now? *cheeky Mirajane face* Or are you talking about boys?!
Lucy: No way! I'm not talking about Natsu!
Shana: Oho! I didn't even mention Natsu!
Lucy: *blushes so hard*
Shana: Okay so, anybody here have any resolutions?
Lucy: Get all the zodiac keys!
Shana: That's hard work. How many do you have now?
Lucy: I have 10 zodiac keys.
Shana: Wow, Levy?
Levy: I'll get more stronger, grow, and read more...and *looks and Lisanna, Shana and Lucy* grow. *sigh*
Shana: Oh don't worry Levy! This way, you'll have Gajeel help you all the time.
Levy: And that's good?! *blush*
Shana: You, Lisanna?
Lisanna: I too, will grow more stronger and try to help everyone!
Shana: Hm, do you have any other resolutions? Like, something to do with puppets or helmets or knights? *cheeky smile*
Lisanna: *blush* What? NO!
Shana: Well I guess that's you guys done!
Shana: Currently, I am sitting next to Wakaba and Macao. What's your resolutions?
Both: Get a girlfriend.. *sigh*
Shana: Oh, feel my pity.
Both: *gleam in eyes*
Shana: I'M NOT SINGLE!
Cana: Pathetic fools.
Shana: Here is the best drinker in all of Magnolia, Cana Alberona! Such an honor meeting you.
Masane: Wait a minute, isn't that kinda weird she's know for something so disturbing and you're holding an honor for that?
Cana: Honor meeting ya too!
Shana: What's your resolution?
Cana: Beat that Bacchus Baka!
Shana: Good luck with that..
Macao: That guy must be a real man to do that to her...
Elfman: WHY IS THIS TALK OF MEN, NOT INVOLVING THE EVER SO MANLY ME?! SHOULD I INTERRUPT, -IN A MANLY FASHION- THAT THIS IS NOT MANLY ENOUGH WITH OUT THE MANLY ME!
Shana: Oh! Here's the real man, Elfman! What is your resolution?
Elfman: To be a real man!
Shana: Even last year you said that...
Elfman: Oh please, be a man!
Shana: But I'm not a man!
Evergreen: Elfman! Stop violating the girl's space!
Elfman: I did not!
Shana: Evergreen! What's your resolution, Ever?
Evergreen: To become the best fairy there ever was! *Erza sneezes somewhere*
Elfman: That wasn't so manly..
Shana: That's because she's a woman... *face palm*
Shana: This is the Raijinshuu! Freed-San, what is your resolution?
Freed: To become worthy of being Laxus' partner, *sobs*
Shana: Uh, why are you crying?
Freed: Leave me in my sorrow of not being the worthy one! *sobs*
Shana: What the hell?!
Bixlow: Oh don't worry, sometimes he does snap..
Shana: Bixlow! Your resolution?
Bixlow: Heh! Nothing more, just become stronger and better.
Shana: Anything else. Something to do with animals, silver hair, shorts? *Lisanna coughs*
Bixlow: Uh what? No. I don't even know.
Shana: Anyway! Laxus-Sempai!
Laxus: Eh?
Shana: Can you tell me your resolution? *slight fangirl*
Laxus: To become the best there was, the best there is, the best there will be. Which I already am.
Shana: Reminds me of some wrestler...
Shana: So now we are here with Gaj and Lily.. Resolution? Guys?
Gajeel: Beat Salamander and Icy Underwear.
Shana: Something to do with bookworms, short people, blue hair?
Gajeel: No! *blushes uncontrollably*
Shana: Awwn! HE'S BLUSHING! What about you, Lily?
Lily: Help Gajeel more.
Shana: Nice.
Shana: So I'm here with the Shota and Loli, Wendy and Romeo! Happy and Carla are here too!
Wendy: L-loli?
Romeo: I AM NO SHOTACON!
Shana: Can I have your resolutions?
Romeo: Be as strong as Natsu! And beat him!
Wendy: Be stronger and worthy of Fairy Tail!
Shana: Happy? Carla?
Happy: Catch billions of fish and win Carla.
Carla: What? Anyway I would be better than that he-cat ever was!
Shana: Okay, thanks guys!
Shana: We got the rest of Shadow Gear here! So?
Jet: Get Levy.
Droy: Get Levy and eat more.
Jet: You are fatter than a panda!
Mirajane: Here's your 39th Ice Cream order, Droy!
Jet: What?!
Shana: Oh Demon Mirajane!—Uh I mean, Mira-san! Your resolutions?
Mirajane: To be a good sister and to get all these blind couples together!
Erza: What blind couples?
Shana: Oh Erza-san! Your resolutions please?
Erza: Oh, to be the best female wizard and work hard to protect my family!
Shana: Nothing about Jellal?
Erza: Je-Jellal? *blushes*
Mirajane: Yep. Blind couples together is the best resolution there is.
Shana: So true! *high five*
Shana: Our awesome day with the Fairy Tail is ending. For the last interview, we have Master Makarov!
Master: Hey!
Shana: So Master, you have a big responsibility, hm? So what's your resolution?
Master: Get all the editions of Hentai Queen..
Shana: Excuse me?
Master: Become an awesome Master...!
Shana: Oh! *turns to camera*
Shana: So our awesome day with Fairy Tail came to an end! It was fun, I agree. Stay tuned for next year! All these wizards had told me off camera, that this year was full of ups and downs, but the end of the year, they all missed it a lot. Surely I miss it too! How about you Masane?
Masane: I do miss everything a lot! But isn't it true that we all miss everywhere. Such nice memories.
Shana: Yeah! Stay tuned for next year! Happy New Year from Magnolia TV and myself! Once again this Shana and bye from Magnolia TV!
notes: HEYYY guys! Happy New Year, fellow readers! I LOOVE you all! Seriously this whole year was awesome for me, except Fairy Tail going on March 30th. :( So happy they are coming back on April 4th! Anyway this year I figured out about Fanfiction. I am so happy I found out about Fanfiction. I wouldn't have met these wonderful people, if I didn't. I'm so thankful for everything that happened this year!