Tear Stained Cheeks
I gazed down at the paper as a chilling shiver ran down my spine. Was this true? Could it be, or was I only dreaming? The paper said he had been driving along when a car abruptly broad-sided him. It said he had died instantly. That was better I guess, he had never really been able to take pain well. Nothing anyone could have done would have been able to save him. He had been wearing a seat belt and he had his lights and blinker on, yet he was dead. I was never going to see him again. I would never be able to hold him in my arms, or feel his face against mine. He was gone, forever.
" I guess you heard about Jack?"
" Yeah, man, that's so awful. Are you ok? Should I come over? Would you like me to bring you something, maybe some chicken noodle soup, or some ice cream, or…"
" No, I think I just need to be alone."
" Ok, but if you need anything don't hesitate to call, I'm always here for you, 24/7, just call and I'll be over."
" Thanks, but really, I just need to be by myself."
" Ok."
" Bye."
" Bye."
~ 1 Year Earlier ~
Mack~
OMG! Have you seen Jack today? He looks so hot! Every time I see him I melt into molten lava. Yeah, so I was walking down the hall and when we passed I gazed into those gorgeous, cerulean, blue eyes of his. Ooooh! Man, I can't wait until next period when I get to see him. I have to go, TTYL. .
~ Izzy ~
Izzy~
Girl, you are so right. He looks so fine today. Mmm Mmm! I love the whole faded jeans and t-shirt look. You certainly have excellent taste. Oh yeah, remind me later to tell ya some chit-chat, k? See ya next period.
~ Mack ~
Izzy~
Ok so when we were in Language Arts today I overheard Jack talking about some girl he was just dying to ask out. I think it was you. Dermot was totally all like, " Yeah, so, just ask her, Jack. Just do it." Jack was all like, " No, not now. She's not even here yet." Then you came in and wow! Jack's head totally did a 360, well if it could have, it would have. I just thought I would let you know that I think Jack totally wants you! TTYL!
~ Mack ~
Mack~
No way, are you serious? This can't be true, he would never, in a million, trillion years, ask me out! But what if he did? What would I say, what would I do? Mack, are you SURE you heard him correctly? Write back ASAP!!!!
~ Izzy ~
Izzy~
Of course I'm sure! I have never been more positive about anything in my life! Just wait and see. You have science with him next, so wait and see if he makes a move. Oh, and if he does ask you out, remember that this is the guy you have been crushing on for the whole year, ever since you saw those gorgeous baby blues of his. So, duh, say yes!
~ Mack ~
Mack~
AHHHHHH! HE ASKED ME OUT! I said yes of course, thanks for the advice. I am proud to say that we are now officially an item. I could not be more jubilant then I am now at this moment in time! I can't wait to tell you all the details; you'll pee when you here them. I could tell he was really nervous, but everything worked out!
~ Izzy ~
Izzy~
Are you serious? I can't believe he actually did it today. And so soon! Wow! So, are you like super psyched? I can just see you now. You're sitting in government, or no wait, you're in gym now; you see him, he's all sweaty, mmm you think, he looks over and smiles, those crystal incisors gleam back at you, you melt. Am I right? Well, you know I am. I'll talk to you later, k?
~ Mack~
Mack~
Last night Jack and I went out running around Lake Calhoun. It was so romantic. We stopped and bought ice cream at Sebastian Joes, it was scrumptious. Then we walked back to Jack's house and sat on his balcony talking for endless hours. He said some pretty sweet things. I wish I could remember them all. Well, I should go, but I'll talk to you tomorrow at school. Are you ready? First day of senior year, this is going to be a blast!
~ Izzy ~
Izzy~
Today seems to drag on and on. I wish it were still summer. My tan is going to start fading fast. Before you know it I'll be putting on the old bronzer just to make somewhat of a difference to my starch white face. Anyway, last night was good? So, what exactly did Jack do to make it so romantic? Did he sweep you off your feet and spoon feed ice cream into your mouth? Jk! But really, you guys had to have been dripping with sweat from your run, was it all that romantic? I can just picture him saying, " Isabelle, let me wipe the sweat from your brow with my sweaty shirt." I should go. Talk to me later, k?
~ Mack ~
Mack~
That is not at all what it was like, it was romantic, we just sat on his balcony and talked. Then, when I was about to leave, he walked me to my car and gave me a ' goodnight, sleep-tight' kiss as we call them. My heart molded into melted butter. That's why it was so romantic! TTYL.
~ Izzy ~
Izzy~
That does sound dreamy. Except for the whole sweat thing! I still can't imagine anything being romantic when you are covered in sweat, even if it is with Jack. Today, Dermot and I were gabbing away in math, he was telling me about how Jack always talks about you. Isn't it wonderful to be loved? I think they're planning something for your birthday, but I can't say for sure.
~ Mack ~
Mack~
Well, that would be nice if they were planning something for me, unfortunately I know they are not, Jack is going away for Thanksgiving Break. It's such a long way off too, why would they be talking about it so far in advance?
~ Izzy ~
* 3 Months Later *
Mack~
Two days until Jack leaves for the next week and a half. I will be so lonely without him. But hey, it will give us a good chance to catch up on stuff. I still haven't decided on what to do for my birthday, have any ideas? I can't wait until Christmas, I don't particularly care for the Thanksgiving holiday. I can't wait to shop for gifts. Call me!
~ Izzy ~
Izzy~
I say we wait until next month for you to have a party. Think of it this way; you'll get a ton more presents, after the fact! We definitely have to do something this week! Don't worry, Jack will be back before you know it! He'll be here for Christmas, I know that for a fact.
~ Mack ~
Mack~
Jack's plane came in today around 7:45pm. I went to get him from the airport. He is so tan! The sun really makes him look quite sexy. I told him about your idea for my birthday party, being later next month, he said that would be great. He's going to throw me a party in-between Christmas and New Year's Eve. I am so happy and thankful that he came back safely, you never know what can happen. I just have to be looking out for my man, I guess.
~ Izzy ~
* One month later, Isabelle's party *
" Hey, great party Izzy!"
" Yeah, I love the way you've decorated!"
" Hola, birthday girl! Can I give you a birthday kiss?"
" Sure Jack, but, hang on, more people are coming, it will have to wait one minute."
" Ok, Izzy. Hey, who brought this beer?"
" Beer? Nobody was supposed to bring any alcohol, if the cops came by we could get in serious trouble. Get rid of it, and whoever brought it, Jack."
" Ok."
* 4 Hours Later *
" Fewfta! I'm exhausted. Mack, where's Jack?"
" He's downstairs, I think."
" K, I'll go look," as she ran downstairs and back up, "He's not down there, Mack. You don't supposed he left do you?"
" Actually, now that I think of it, I did see him get into his car, I think he was going to drive home some guys who had a little too much Bud. I'm sure he will be right back."
" I hope so, I promised baby blue I'd let him give me my birthday kiss."
* 3 Hours Later *
" He's still not back. I think I'm just going to turn in for the night, Mack."
" Ok, I think I'm going to head home."
" Bye."
* The Funeral *
As I stand here today before this crowd of mourners, my tear stained cheeks becoming damper and damper as I go, I say this; Jack lived life to the fullest, he made every moment count, every person felt loved when he was near. There is nothing that can ever compare to the love I will always keep in my heart for Jack. He taught me how to love life and to 'live life with no regrets'. I know that Jack is in a much better place, one where everyone loves and no one feels sorrow, one where the sky is always a brilliant array of blues, and the clouds sparkle as though glimmering strands of tinsel dancing across the sky. But for those of us who are left here with only the memories, there is nothing happy, nothing wonderful.
Jack, the men who took you life deserve to give their own, you never deserved to die, you left not only memories in my head, but footprints in my heart, I wish it had been me instead, but it wasn't, it was you. My only love, my baby blue.