Blond Jokes

By stormshadow13

Disclaimer, If I owned there would be a season two in the anime.

Author's Note; I got this idea in algebra and it wouldn't leave me alone until I wrote it down. I would also like to add this is not my normal View on Blonds. Thank you.

Speech

(Daisuke to Dark)

((Dark to Daisuke))

Satoshi to Krad

Krad to Satoshi

It was the typical highst for Dark Mousey, Break into the museum, steal the artwork of the night, allude the police, get chased by Creepy Boy, lose Creepy Boy and Escape. Well maybe not so typical since he hadn't quite pulled off the escape part this time. He was currently being pinned to a pillar by his psychotic homicidal other half.

("Dark! How could you let him catch you!")

(("Sorry Dai Chan I didn't see him coming."))

("Didn't see him? How could you not see him? He stands out like a beacon! I mean how can you not see a guy with blond hair, white wings, and dressed in white and gold?" At NIGHT??)

(("Okay, okay I get the point. Now shut up and let me think of a way to get out of this situation. I got it, I could kiss him, that would make him let go of me."))

("Kiss Krad!? Eww, no way!")

(("You could always think of it this way Dai Chan, you'd be indirectly kissing Creepy Boy."))

("NO!")

(("Well, you do have to admit Krad is attractive in a psychotic homicidal blond kinda way."))

("DARK!")

(("Alright alright, no kissing Krad, this time. Hum, I got it!")) Dark turned his attention outward to his gloating other self. "Hey Krad, I have a question for you."

Krad stopped in mid gloat, "eh?"

Dark smirked as he felt Krad's grip loosen a bit. "Why do blonds wear pony tales?"

"..."

Dark answered his own question. "To hide the valve stem." He twisted free from his confused other half and nearly laughed out loud at the expression on Krad's face. (("Oh, this is priceless."))

"Valve stem? Did Mousey just imply that I'm an airhead?"

Satoshi who was listening from the back of Krad's mind coughed. "I think the joke was referring to blonds in general, but since you are a blond... I believe that the answer is, yes Krad he did just basically call you an airhead."

"I'm going to kill him," Krad turned a murderous amber gaze in Dark's direction.

Dark ignored the glare Krad was giving him and continued. "So why did the blond get so excited after finishing a jigsaw puzzle in only six months?... Because on the box it said from 2 to 4 years... Do you know the difference between a smart blond and UFOs?"

Krad snarled and began to advance on Dark forming a glowing ball of deadly golden energy.

"UFOs have been sighted." Dark ducked the energy ball ignoring the fatal damage it did to the stone pillar behind him. "Ah, didn't like that one huh? How about this, If a blond and a brunette fell off a building who would hit the ground first?"

Satoshi was now smothering his laughter.

"The brunette the blond would have to stop for directions." Dark dodged a second fire ball still grinning. "So what do you call a smart blond?"

Krad lunged for Dark and the Kaito leapt out of the path of the irate hunter. The blond skidded on the slick tile floor and spun to face his other half.

Dark laughed, "a yellow lab," he was enjoying this.

Krad paused in the formation of a third energy blast. "What's a yellow lab?"

Satoshi had now completely lost his battle not to laugh aloud. "It's a breed of dog."

Krad's eyes narrowed, "I am not only going to kill him and incinerate his mangled corpse but I am going to cover his ashes in kerosene and incinerate them once AGAIN!!!"

("Um Dark, are you trying to piss him off or have you just lost your mind!?")

(("Aww, come on Dai Chan, I'm just having a little fun."))

Daisuke blinked, ("Fun? You call this FUN??")

Dark grinned and watched his counterpart stalk towards him. Krad's wings were half spread giving him the appearance of being larger then he actually was, his teeth were bared in a feral snarl and his amber eyes glittered in fury. (("Wow, he's really cute when he's mad."))

Daisuke smacked his forehead. ("Oh for...")

"So why do blonds wear their hair up?"

Krad leapt for Dark not expecting what happened next.

Dark instead of dodging Krad's leap stepped forward, caught the startled ice demon by the wrist, twisted and threw him over his head.

Krad suddenly found himself airborne and not of his own volition. He flipped landing flat on his back and lie there winded.

Dark took advantage of his counterpart's disorientation to straddle him and pin Krad's hand's above his head. Dark leaned down and wispered in the blonds ear. "To catch everything that goes over their heads."

Krad began to thrash trying to break free. "GET OFF!"

("Dark, you should have run for it when he first hit the floor. But you just had to get that last answer in.")

(("Don't worry Dai Chan, I know how to quiet him."))

("Dark, what are you going to do? DARK?")

Dark ignored Daisuke and swiftly leaned down capturing the struggling blond's mouth in a fierce kiss.

Krad froze, amber eyes widening in surprise.

Dark leaned back, "Hmmmm, you taste like a cold winter's morning."

Krad was still in to much shock to do anything but gape at his other half.

Dark leaned down again and wispered in Krad's ear. "Until our next fight." He pecked the blond on the lips and leapt to his feet. Dark sprinted across the room and crashed through the window summoning Wiz as he did and flew off into the night sky. Leaving one very confounded ice demon in the museum.