TITLE: Avengerous Vocabulary

GENRE: General/Humor

RATING: K

SUMMARY: Just some nonsense that popped up in my head after I saw a picture :)

NOTE: 1. Nothing belongs to me (except for Marsha).

2. If you want to see the picture that inspired me, google 'Avengerous Vocabulary' and look at the images. The first ones are the one that inspired me :)

3. Also, I just put this to happen after the Avengers movie, but Coulson's still alive, so...

Tony had invited Agent Coulson to his favourite café (a small one in a street somewhat away from the noise of Time Square) to discuss the jorney to Portland. They hadn't found time in the last two weeks, because of all the fuzz around the Avengers, but since Tony normally was a man who kept his promises (well, sometimes), and he also liked the Agent a lot (not that he would tell anyone), he insisted on the jorney. And also, the café apparently served great coffee and doughnuts. The owner, an older woman called Marsha, had took their order and vanished into the kitchen.

"So, did she write an e-mail telling you when she's got time?" the billionaire asked.

The agent nodded. "She's got vacation beginning at 31st July."

"Yeah, great. Then I'm just back from my jorney to Macao. There's an expo that can't live without the great Tony Stark. I totally understand them, by the way."

Coulson smiled. They had become sort-of friends over the past few weeks.

"There you got." Marsha said and put the plates with the doughnuts and their coffee in front of them. "Just call if you need something."

"Thank you, Marsha." Coulson replied, polite as always. Then he saw how Tony ogled their food. "What's wrong?"

"See, that's a coffee and a doughnut, right?"

The agent nodded, unsure about what Tony wanted to tell him.

"You are lost, humans! I escaped the Agardian Guards, they are no match for me, Loki, King of the Earth. Now, I will take my revenge upon you, stupid humans!" Somebody placed himself on a chair next to Agent Coulson. Loki.

"That's not possible!" said agent exclaimed.

"Wait!" Tony yelled. "Wait." he said again when he had both man's attention and also Marsha's, who had come out of her kitchen. A grey kitten padded around the woman's feet.

"Marsha, what's this?" Tony asked and pointed to the coffee cup.

"Um... a coffee cup?"

"Yeah, and this?" he pointed towards Coulson's gun that lay on the table.

"A... weapon?"

"Right, and this?"

„Doughnut... but why are you asking me?"

"Hold on a sec. What's that?"

"That's a kitten, Mr Stark, but what are you doing?"

"Ok, see. That's fuel." He pointed at the coffee cup. "That's a weapon." He pointed towards the gun. "That's also fuel, and this is a kitten. So, Loki, what about you?"

The evil god snickered. "You dare to ask me, Loki, such a minor question? Then you shall have your answer. All of this is unworthy of me, this pathetic mortal stuff. I am a god." Then the madness started to burn in his eyes, higher than anytime before. "But now I must go, for that" He pointed at the yawning kitten. "Might endanger my royal life. It is a possible ally, so I must immediately call for my army."

He stood up and vanished with a shimmer.

Tony shrugged his shoulders. "That guy's crazy." Then, more loudly: "And you, Agent Coulson? In your capacity as a top-secret agent, what are these things to you?"

The man opposite of him shrugged. "Weapon, weapon, weapon, weapon. Any questions?"

Tony frowned. "Well, how will you use a kitten as a weapon?"

"There are so many possibilities... but could we focus on Portland?" The agent took a sip of his coffee.

"Sure..." the billioniare said and looked from the corner of his eye to the kitten. If Loki regarded the little ball of fur as a possible enemy, it could maybe even try to attack Iron Man!

Yeah, fluffy kitten power! Umm, yeah. Review? :)