A/N: I had this idea pop into my head and it wouldn''t leave me alone. I am proud of this as it stands as my first completed work of fanfiction. It is meant to be stand alone but will serve as a companion piece to a larger piece of work I plan to do in the fandom once I finish my Star Trek TNG piece. This is my first attempt at a 1st person present tense POV. I hope you enjoy it. I love feedback!
I'm Your #1 Fan
Fandom: The Incredibles
Pairing: Mirage/Elastigirl (Helen Parr), Hint of future Mirage/Violet Parr
Rating: T
. . .
I stand in front of the door, nerves keeping my hand from knocking. It is a nice house, a proper subruban home for a family of five. I chew my lip. Indecision runs rampant through my mind. Finally I lift my hand, rapping my knuckles against the cold, hard door. A full minute passes before she opens it, distracted by her infant gurgling and squirming in her arms.
"Helen." My voice sounds far away. She blinks, then again. The baby ends our stare, nearly leaping fron her arms. She flexed, looping a rubbery but strong arm around her son. A loud crash came from inside the house. "I'm sorry is this a bad time?" I feel stupid showing up unannounced...uninvited and unwelcome. She regarded me warily, subconsciously pulling the boy closer. I had heard about the incident with Syndrome. I don't blame her. Shouting behind her drew her attention. I am tempted to flee. Why had I come here in the first place?
"Um no...Bob is out. Look can you come inside? I think Dash broke something." Without warning she thrust the baby into my hands before disappearing into the house to correct whatever her older son had done. I look down at the boy in my arms. He released a bright, gurgling chuckle complete with bubbles. I can't help but smile at him. I follow her inside and close the door behind me.
I can hear a stern discussion from the other room: Dash had broken a lamp trying to touch every object in the room in under five seconds. I walk towards the commotion, spotting the timid daughter holding a stopwatch. It pleases me to see the super family embracing their unique abilities. She gives me a shy smile, dark hair falling in front of her right eye. Before I can speak Helen returns to take the baby from me, handing the joyous infant to his sister.
"Take Jack-Jack and go in the living room for a little while."
"Isn't she..." Violet began. Helen silences her with a maternal frown. Even my curiosity is quelled.
"Now." The single word electrifies my spine. I clasp my hands together to keep from fidgeting. The children take their brother and slink away. I can tell they want to eavesdrop, but they wont. I am alone with her now. I watch her walk away, leading me through the dining room and into the kitchen.
"I see your family is adjusting well," I say as I admire the boy's athletic ribbons decorating the refrigerator. I smile at the variety of colors. He certainly knows how to be a good sport. I look back at her. She has her arms crossed, innocently hostile to me. Again, I can't blame her.
"I am finding it hard to believe you came here to check up on my family Mirage." I try not to wince. I hate that name but it is the only one she has.
"Would you believe I stopped in for a chat?" I offer a timid smile, my confidence seeping away like sand through a broken glass. She lifts an eyebrow before shrugging, waving me towards the table before sitting and lacing her fingers together. Nerves pin me briefly before I tske my seat, fumbling clumsily with the chair. Only she makes me fumble and stutter and pause.
"So, what did you want to talk about?" What do I want to talk about? I think to tell her about Bob, about how I never wanted to try and seduce him, how he never strayed...how much he loved her. The time is passed for that conversation. She knows. About Bob anyway.
"Hello? Earth to Mirage? Anyone home?" She waves a hand in my face, her arm stretched across the table. "You wanted to talk?" I realize I have been too quiet for too long.
"I want to apologize. For everything I put your family through." I hang my silver hair in my face, mimicing her daughter, head bowed in shame. "I'm the one who told Syndrome about Mr. Incredible." She stays quiet for a moment, thinking. I ramble on, not ready for her response.
"I didn't know you were married. I never would have tried to appeal to him as a man had I known how easy it was to appeal to him as a hero." Her jaw tightens at my admission of seduction. I can see the mistrust is still there between them even if only a little. She scratches the back of her head, embarrassed.
"Do you want a drink? I am going to make some coffee. Do you like coffee?" She jumps up, missing the shake of my head. She busies herself with the preparation, pointedly avoiding my gaze. I let it wander.
She is beautiful even after three children and fifteen years of stressful hiding, pretending to be anything other than what she was: Elastigirl. I watch her stretch and bend, reaching for the things she needs. She mumbles to herself. I catch the word 'temptress' and I blush.
"Look, I don't want to cause any marital discord. I just...I felt like I needed to say something. Especially after I heard Syndrome tried to take..." I feign misremembering his name, attempting to draw her back into the conversation.
"Jack-Jack." She looks over her shoulder at me before returning with two cups of hot instant coffee. Mine is the same color as my skin. I try not to feel flattered. I run my fingers around the rim, unsure what to say next.
"How'd you end up working for a guy like that anyway? You're better than that." A smile tweaks my llips. I'm not better than that or I wouldn't have done it. I bite my lip before being honest.
"Because at first I believed in him, I thought he was going to do more good for supers than bad. There is also you."
"Excuse me?" She splutters, choking on her coffee.
"I'm afraid I am not doing a good job of explaining. It's a long story."
I've got time." It seems her curiosity has gotten the better of her. I was not prepared to reveal my mltives for working with Syndrome when I came here.
"I've always wanted to meet Elastigirl...though I guess it's Mrs. Incredible now." I chuckle. Mrs. Incredible indeed.
"So you thought tricking my husband into going on a dangerous mission, lying to me about it then blowing my children and I out of the sky would get you that?"
"It was not my decision to launch those missiles." My resolve wanes, hurt colors my voice. Her voice is still hard.
"You didn't stop him either."
"I didn't know it was you...I didn't know there were children on the plane." She is being unfair but I deserve it. How many other supers have I led to their deaths?
"Would it have mattered?"
"Of course!" She doesn't believe me. I don't blame her.
"You've always been my favorite..." I mumble. I have been staring at my coffee, unable to look her in the eye.
"Why?" She is standoffish.
"You were one of the first...of the women anyway. Bold and brave, going up against competition like Thunderhead, DynaGuy...even Mr. Incredible. You made a name for yourself." Not like me. "Every girl wanted to be Elastigirl."
"I wasn't all that." Her tone has changed, melancholy and distant. It's easy to toy with a super; they get stuck in their pasts. I let her think, indulging in her form. I can't understand her modesty. Ordinary women would die to have her powers simply for cosmetic reasons. She could make herself tall, thin, impossibly smooth and unlined. Yet she doesn't and for that she is more beautiful to me. I finally admit to myself that I only came here to see her again...even if just once. I say the words that make me cringe but are the only ones that feel appropriate.
"I'm your #1 fan." I lace my fingers around the mug, fixing her with a kind, hopefully charming smile. She blushes. I laugh, toying with the coffee I refuse to drink.
"You wouldn't believe what he paid me to find well, anyone." Her eyes smile as they flick towards the garage that houses their new cars.
"I have an idea."
"I wasn't in the best place then...the money helped with the guilt." I frown, remembering old hurts. I flinch when I feel her palm on the back of my hand. I don't want her pity. "I like to think your husband's moonlighting and frequent relocations made it hard to find you."
"Bob couldn't not help people, you know? It's like he was always to protect people."
"He is strong so others don't have to be." My hand reflexively touches my neck, fiddling with the high necked collar. I do admire him though.
"It's more than that."
"I know. You don't have to explain it to me." I don't especially want to hear about how much she loves him. The silence becomes awkward.
"So you're my biggest fan huh?" I nod, happy to be talking about her again.
"Since you went public. It was your attitude more than your skill set." Not that I minded that either. "I mean yeah Stratogale was cool and Cascade had all the right stuff but no one holds a candle to Elastigirl." She laughs, resting her chin on her knuckles, eyes once more clouded with memories.
"I really didnt care much about the fan club thing, you know the squealing and the screaming. I never liked giving autographs. It made me feel like I was doing it for the wrong reasons." I sympathize with thay feeling. Out of the corner of my eye I think I see a vague lavender shimmer. I ignore it.
"I can't imagine doing some of the things youve done." I bite my lip and look away. "I am a coward."
"You were brave enough to come talk to a woman who though her husband had been unfaithful with you. That's something." She makes me smile. She has me riled up now, getting me to be honest. I stay the course.
"I wouldn't have. I acted like I might...like I would, but I never have."
"Why not?" She had to ask me. I glance to the side.
"My tastes are decidedly more..." Bait.
"Rich? Finely coiffed?" Her insinuation that I might be attractes to Syndrome pushes me ovwr the edge. I don't want anything from her and well...she asked.
"Flexible." Hook.
"I will never forget the exact shade of red she turns. I run a finger around the edge of the now cold coffee, watching the play of emotions across her face, trying to be brave and face my actions. She looks at the table, the cabinets, the wall. Anything but me. I wait and let her process the idea. I had wasted enough hours in my teens thinking about her, though I couldn't say I didn't enjoy forcing her to think about it.
"So...if you'd been after me...instead of Bob?" She doesn't ask directly. I shake my head. Elastigirl is not a job, not to me. I would have gotten attached...I would have been compromised. Her desperate pleas for her childrens' lives aboard the missile flanked plane had already turned my head against Syndrome. Her punch to my jaw compromised my head a little bit too.
"No." I think I see a small hurt touch her face. I tell myself it is imaginary.
"Why not?" I am not imagining things.
"If you were any other woman, maybe. I couldn't live with myself if I had allowed someone to get attached and then sent them to their deaths."
"So you're only interested in women? She ignores my admission, focusing on the evidently more shocking news.
"Is that a problem?" I lift a perfectly manicured silver brow. She flails her arms wildly in a panic.
"No!" She splutters. "No, it's kind of a relief."
"I can imagine." Silence grows again. "I didn't come here to talk about this."
"I know, I don't mean to pry into your personal life. I don't think I've meet anyone quite like you." She is old fashioned.
"You mean a lesbian? Sure you have." A blank look settles on her face. I grin. Her attempt to figure out the answer based on visual factors is cute. "Do you know Cliffracer?"
Her eyes widen in surprise.
"That flashy speedster?" I nod. "And I thought Bob was a show off."
"She certainly was something." I haven't really talked about her before. Melancholy threatens to settle in.
"I heard she had trouble integrating." Helen also grew sad. The forced integration of supers was an unpleasant memory for both of us. In this moment, we become friends. It is nice, I have never had friends. The moment is ruined by the wail of the baby from the front room. She looks at me strangely as if she did not want to leave me.
"You should see to your son. I have taken enough of your time." I stand, wiping sweaty palms on my black dress.
"Thank you." Her voice is quiet.
"For what?" I should be thanking her
She crosses the room in a single step. She is standing too close. Panic freezes my veins, makes me swallow. I close my eyes, bracing myself against whatever it is she is going to say. She does not answer my question. She changes the topic.
"You said 'maybe' if I was any other woman. Why do I get a 'no?'" I have to look at her now. She is still too close.
"I have too much respect for you. You are special...to me. I never had a good role model growing up. Then you showed up...you saved my life once and you didn't even know it. You saved my life again when you found Bob and I in that room." I feel her fingers on my collar, peeling back the fabric to show the hand shaped bruise that discolors my throat even now, a month after. Concern flashes across her face. I take her hand and pull it away from me. I am still nervous since her husband had suspended me from the floor by my throat. I can still feel his immovable grip in my sleep.
"He really hurt you didn't he?" Her hand is on my cheek now. I look away without turning my head. No one else notices but my voice is deeper now. "In a way he hurt both of us...though he didn't mean to." She is right but she is also wrong.
"I hurt you...I hurt him too. I never wanted to but it was easy. It was bittersweet to see you on that island Helen." I like saying her name, knowing her secret identity, her human self. I thought of all the supers I had located...I had to know everyone, but no one knows me. The thought forces an awkward sad noise from my lips. I take a step back. I need space. She steps towards me again.
Before I can open my mouth, her arms are around me; her lips touch mine. My eyes widen in surprise, my hands pushing gently against her shoulders before the fight leaves me. I let her kiss me. She is soft. A moment passes, we separate. She is blushing again.
"What was that for?" The baby interrupts me a second time. She darts from the room, returning quickly with the red-faced child. I let her lead me to the door. She stops me at the concrete step.
"A little something special for my biggest fan." She regards me playfully and I understand her gesture. It touches me. Another crash sounds from inside the house. I wave an unseen goodbye as she returns to her house, bellowing. "DASHIELL ROBERT PARR!" The boy yells in protest. The conversation is cut off when the door shuts behind her.
I smile and touch my lips. I feel like a super, like Ive gone back in time...top of the world. I had gotten a kiss from Elastigirl. Not Mrs. Incredible, not even Helen Parr. No matter who might come after, she will always be my favorite.
. . .
I feel bad letting my brother take the blame for the broken coffee cup. Not too bad though, Mom is used to his messes and his accidents. He barely gets into trouble any more. He can take the heat for me just this once. I don't know why I wanted to look at her cup...I just did. I tasted it...the chill bitterness surprised me and I dropped it.
Mom and I stay quiet while I help her clean up the mess. The coffee, I notice, is the same color as Mirage's skin. I blush, feeling strange for putting the two thoughts together. I cast a glance towards Mom. Her cheeks are pink and I can't help but wonder if we are thinking the same thought.
I don't know what to think about what I've heard, what I've seen. My parents loved each other, I know that, but when Mom talked to her, kissed her, she seemed almost like someone else. I can't talk to Dash about it...he won't understand. I'm not sure I understand.
I go to my room to think, laying down on my bed. I try to distract myself with forcefields, specific invisibility. I cant stop thinking about that kiss. I wondered what my first kiss would be like. I blushed again wondering how Mom had felt...I wondered if that woman, Mirage, was happy or sad about what had happened. I remember her bruises. I cant imagine I would be happy...knowing I couldn't kiss the woman...man...person I cared about because they loved somebody else. I didn't think it was fair of Mom to do something like that, but then it hadnt hadn't been fair of Dad to lie to her about doing hero work with Lucius on "bowling night."
Eventually it is time for bed. Mom comes to say goodnight. I mumble a quiet reply. She turns out the light, unsuspicious of my silence. It is normal for me. I try to let the matter rest. There is only one persob who can answer my questions. But how do you find a mirage?